How Much Light
by MyWindingWheel
Summary: This story begins with the group just discovering the prison. Kate, a member of Rick's group since the beginning after finding herself stranded in GA when the fall occurred, realizes she has feelings for Daryl. She doubts very seriously he feels the same way about her. A slow burn romance that intertwines with the events of S3, before exploring the time at the prison between 3&4
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

\- KATE -

It had been a long morning out in the prison yard with not much to do but wait and worry. A few hours had passed since Rick had led Daryl, T-Dog, Maggie & Glenn into the inner gate of the prison.

The rest of the group stayed in the yard that they had cleared the day before.

"This is going to take forever." Carl whined.

"How do you eat an elephant?" Hershel joked. "One bite at a time."

Carl grinned. "I wish I could eat an elephant right now!"

They laughed, despite their hunger, before looking back at the prison.

"What is going on inside those walls?" Lori worried, absentmindedly rubbing the front of her belly.

Kate and Beth sat Indian style on the grass, taking in the surroundings and talking about things before the turn: movies, music, food. If it wasn't for the fact that they were filthy and only several feet from creatures waiting to tear the flesh off their bones, you might think they were two carefree girls enjoying an afternoon in the sun. A few feet away, Carol sat next to Lori, the two women talking in hushed tones. Kate imagined they were discussing Rick and Lori's deteriorating marriage. The last few months they had had little privacy, moving together from house to house, staying quiet, searching for food and running from walkers. It was a rare opportunity to get to speak to someone without the others within earshot.

Hershel and Carl walked the perimeter several times, waiting for the first sign of their group to emerge. Finally they heard the scraping of metal on cement as Glenn pushed the sliding door entrance to one of the buildings open and stepped out, squinting into the bright sun. Maggie followed closely behind. At first they all froze, afraid of what Rick, Daryl and T-Dog's absence meant. Kate's heart felt like it had dropped into her stomach, but almost immediately they knew all was fine because Glenn was grinning ear-to-ear.

"Get the stuff. We're moving in," he shouted. "We cleared a cell block. Rick, T and Daryl are dragging out the last of the walkers now."

They all scrambled up. Kate and Carol helping a very pregnant Lori to her feet. They went to the truck and filled their arms with their few belongings - backpacks holding whatever necessities they had managed to find while scavenging houses and their bedrolls. Glenn led the way into the pitch black of the prison, a small flashlight dimly lighting their path. Fallen walkers littered the narrow hall. It was eerily quiet. Eventually though, they could hear Daryl and T-Dog and, soon after, Glenn opened a door to a sort of common room.

It was filled with a filmy light that streamed in from narrow, barred windows that reached to the top of the high ceiling. The room held a guard tower on the wall opposite the one they just came through and two metal octagon shaped tables with four seats cemented around each. On either side of the door there were empty cages. Glenn continued down the few cement steps, crossed the common room diagonally and opened the steel barred door leading to the cells.

They walked into the narrow room single file. It was gray and filled with debris. Daryl was throwing the last remaining walker off the top level. It landed with a loud thud on the cement below before T-Dog grabbed it by its legs and started dragging it to the door. The cell block was long, with two levels of small cells lining the left side, seven on top, seven on bottom and windows on the right. About two thirds down the block was a set of stairs leading to the landing above and a second set going back down where there was another steel barred door. A large "C" was painted in black on either side of the room.

"What do you think?" Rick asked as he headed down the stairs.

"Home sweet home." An exhausted Glenn replied as he headed towards a cell.

"For the time being." Rick returned.

"It's secure?" Lori looked questioningly around the room.

The look on Rick's face as he eyed his wife went from satisfaction to irritation and maybe even resentment.

"This cell block is." He replied curtly.

"What about the rest of the prison?" Hershel asked.

Rick laid out his plan. "In the morning, we'll find the cafeteria and infirmary."

Kate headed up the stairs to find a relatively clean cell. She thought she might feel safer up there. She passed Daryl on the landing, he had pulled a bunk mattress out of a cell and onto the floor. He was making himself comfortable, muscled arms kneading at the thin mattress.

"I ain't sleeping in no cage." He said to her as he folded his arms behind his head and stretched out his legs. She smiled at him and peered into the closest cell. There was a narrow bunk on the right hand wall with a plastic covered mattress the color of hospital scrubs. On the left there was a couple of metal shelves, a filthy toilet and a small sink. Neither were operable. She threw her bed roll onto the bottom bunk and her backpack up top. She sat on the mattress with a sigh and looked around. Blackish blood was smeared on the opposite wall and she could see some more on the bars. This place definitely needed some cleaning, but they could handle that. A little smile appeared on her lips as she thought about how Rick had said they could make this place a home. She was thinking he might be right.

She must have dozed off because when she heard Rick call out for them to all gather in the common area, her cell was pitch black. She stood up and started feeling her way to her pack to grab her flashlight.

"You need a light?" Daryl's gruff voice filled her cell at the same time his light did. She quickly found her's and turned to him.

"Thank you." She smiled and clicked her light on and off before following him out and down the stairs.

Out in the common room, Rick stood near one of the tables, a camping lantern they had found a few weeks back illuminated the room in a yellow bath of light. Maggie and Glenn sat closely on the steps by the door to the yard. Hershel, Beth and Carol occupied the seats at one table with T-Dog, Carl and Lori at the one closest to Rick. Kate crossed the room and sat next to Beth. Daryl chose to lean against the guard tower, crossbow still at his side. Carol started passing around a jar of half finished nuts and a stale bag of crackers. It wasn't much, but it was something and they had a roof over their heads.

Rick started, "Tomorrow, a few of us will continue deeper into the prison. Hopefully find food and supplies. Those of you staying back can start cleaning up the living quarters. I know we don't have water or cleaning supplies yet, but we can get all this junk out of here. Hershel and I were talking, we agree it would be wise to have a guard up in the tower each night. At least until we know we are secure. We figure two shifts a night. Everyone should get enough sleep that way."

Everyone shook their head in agreement. Hershel stood.

"Rick asked me to put together a schedule. For the time being, I've gone with three teams of two. You will alternate every third night. You can decide amongst yourselves who takes first watch before switching for the night. Maggie and Glenn, you'll get tonight."

If Hershel noticed the playful glance the two exchanged he didn't let on.

"Tomorrow night, T-Dog and Carol. Night after, Daryl and Kate."

Kate turned her eyes towards Daryl and smiled. He didn't smile back, but held her stare a few seconds before looking down. Rick dismissed them and everyone headed back to their cells to spend the first night in their new home. Kate watched as Maggie and Glenn left the block, each dragging an extra bunk mattress and their bedding. She had no doubt they were looking forward to the privacy a night in the tower would provide.

As she laid down in her bed that night she thought about her new home and the people she shared it with. She was so thankful for Rick and his leadership. After the Randall incident at the farm, they all realized that people in this world were capable of terrible things. She was so lucky she was with a group lead by a man with morals, who would fight for his family - which she believed now included her. She trusted him completely and knew he took on a great burden that he didn't ask for.

Lori and Carol both brought some stability to the group. They tried to keep a sense of home to wherever they ended up. Both had been dealing with heavy issues. Carol with the death of Sophia and Lori with her pregnancy and the fall out she and Rick had been experiencing since Shane's death, but they still worked hard for that feeling of normalcy. Kate didn't have as much in common with them as she did with Maggie and Beth, but they were the ones that brought her into the group back on the highway the night Atlanta was bombed and she would always be grateful.

Hershel was one of the best men she had ever known. A wise man who had earned everyone's respect easily. Kind, devoted to his family, moral and tough as nails when it came down to it, he took their group in and provided food and shelter at one of their most desperate moments. The medical experience he had made him invaluable - a luxury she was sure few had in the world these days and the man himself was such a comfort to everyone.

She and Glenn had made fast friends back in camp at the beginning of this all. He and she fell into their friendship naturally and he kind of filled the role of a brother for her - here 3,000 miles away from her own. He was funny and kind and these days you couldn't get enough of either.

Beth and Maggie had become her closest confidants. Not that there was much to confide when they were all practically living on top of each other. But on the days when she missed her family so much the tears couldn't be held, it was them that she talked to about it. They also could spend hours talking like girlfriends do. Getting all the good info about Maggie and Glenn or talking about things they missed from the past.

T-Dog was a big softie. He had one of the biggest hearts and was so considerate. He was always up for whatever they needed. If Kate was having a rough day, T always picked up on it and would check in with her. Sometimes just getting her mind off of it by telling some story or joke he knew.

And then there was Daryl. Lately she had realized she was feeling differently about him and she was still trying to sort out what that meant. Things were different now. Simple crushes seemed frivolous and distracting. There wasn't time to indulge in silly school girl antics when people were dying, food was scarce and everyday was a fight to survive. Still, she was only human and watching Daryl go from an angry outsider who everyone gave plenty of space, to the man he was now, had been moving. His kindness and loyalty came as a surprise to everyone as it slowly emerged during their days on the Greene farm. The months on the road after they fled confirmed that everyday. He was clearly Rick's go-to man, someone to be trusted, the one they all counted on for food and protection. The one that would always go that extra mile when everyone else was done. Do the jobs no one else would do. It was like he was constantly having to prove to himself and everyone else, that he was worthy. That if he didn't belong, he could at least earn his keep.

When she first met Daryl, back at the camp when she had followed Shane, Lori and the Peletiers from the road, she was immediately put off by him and his brother Merle. She was ashamed now about how she felt, but they seemed like they were no good, redneck trash. Merle was the talker and all that came out of his mouth was profanity laced racism and sexual remarks. They both drank, smoked and didn't seem to want to be pleasant to anyone. She wondered often why they stuck around at all. She kept her distance from them both, thankful that Shane was there to keep everyone in check. She felt safer. How ironic considering how that all turned out now.

But somewhere between that rock quarry and the fall of the farm, she began to see him. If she was honest with herself, it wasn't just his transformation. She would find herself distracted by the rope-like muscles in his arms, his broad shoulders, his gravely voice and that pissed off gait of his. The very last person who would think that Daryl Dixon was attractive was Daryl Dixon and that made him even more so.

Despite all of this, she tried her best to push these feelings aside. There was no place for that in this world and she was quite sure Daryl would never return her feelings.

Kate fell asleep, glad to spend what she hoped would be the first of many nights in their new home. They had a lot of work to do, but for the first time in a long time she felt hopeful.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

\- Kate -

Kate woke up when the light started streaming through the grimy windows. The first thing she saw when she opened her eyes was the filthy toilet and she couldn't help but laugh. Maybe if they were here long enough, they could figure out a way to hide them. She had slept better than she had in a long time, but still woke several times out of habit. She could hear people moving around downstairs and she made her way out of the cell.

Lori was coming out of the cell she and Carol were sharing, two spots down from Kate's, looking uncomfortable and puffy. She waited and they walked downstairs together. Poor Lori whatever her responsibility in the demise of her marriage, Kate knew she must feel so alone and scared. They were all very thankful that they had Hershel there, but if something went very wrong, there was nothing that could be done. Kate did not envy her situation and offered a small, encouraging smile.

"How'd you sleep?" She asked.

Lori looked at her like she was crazy and rolled her eyes with a sigh.

"Not very well."

"I'm sorry." Kate said, genuine concern in her voice.

"It's ok. It's pretty impossible this far along."

Kate nodded and watched Lori walk towards her son, who ducked out of her reach and went to stand with his father who was getting the same group that cleared the block yesterday organized to head deeper into the prison. Since they didn't have any food left, it was decided it would be best if the search for the cafeteria happened first thing. Hershel was going to join them in hopes that if they found the infirmary he could see what supplies they had and he could start prepping for Lori's delivery. The six of them headed to the door that led from the common room to the rest of the prison and disappeared one by one. Carl shut the door behind them.

"Where should we start?" Carol asked cheerily.

Carl rolled his eyes and groaned. He clearly thought he should be helping clear the prison and not stuck cleaning house. The rest of them didn't mind, they got to it. They didn't have cleaning supplies or even trash bags, but they were able to start piling the junk from the cells out in the common room. Not much time had passed when they heard the commotion.

"OPEN THE DOOR! IT'S HERSHEL! CARL, COME ON!" Rick bellowed.

At his father's command, Carl ran to the steel door separating the cell block from the common room and unlocked it as quickly as possible. They came rushing in with Hershel, unconscious and bloody, laid out on some sort of rolling table.

"Oh my god!" Carol blurted out.

"Daddy!" Beth cried, as Rick and Glenn tried to steer the table into a cell. Maggie leaned heavily on what was left of Hershel's right leg, her face twisted in horrified concentration.

"Get him on the bed." Rick ordered. "He got bit."

"Oh my god, he's gonna turn!" Beth wailed, pressing herself uselessly against the wall of the tiny cell.

"Did you cut it off?" Lori asked. "Maybe you got it in time."

They moved Hershel onto the bed and Kate stood outside the cell watching helplessly as Carol used what little training Hershel had given her in hopes she could assist in Lori's delivery to figure out a way to save his life.

In the chaos she hadn't noticed that Daryl hadn't returned with them, until she heard him shouting from the common room.

"That's far enough!"

She sprinted back to the door and watched through the bars as five men in prison jumpsuits came through the door that led to the rest of the prison.

Daryl had planted himself at one of the metal tables, his crossbow aimed at them.

A slimy looking guy with deep set, narrow eyes and long greasy hair pulled back in a half ponytail spoke first.

"Cell Block C. Cell 4. Thats mine, gringo. Let me in."

Kate didn't miss the gun tucked into the front of his pants and she tried not to panic.

"Today's your lucky day, fellas. You've been pardoned by the State of Georgia. You're free to go." Daryl growled.

"What you got going on in there?" The man asked, looking towards the cell block and spotting Kate.

"It ain't none of your concern." Daryl snarled, still looking down his crossbow.

"Don't be telling me what's my concern." The man snapped back, his eyes darted back to Daryl and he pulled out his gun.

One of the other prisoners, a huge black man with a kind voice, spoke up.

"Chill, man. Dude's leg is messed up. Besides, we're free now! Why are we still in here?"

"Man's got a point." Daryl spat.

"Yeah, and I got check on my old lady." A third prisoner added and Kate almost felt sorry for them as she realized they had no idea how bad it was outside of these walls.

The man with the gun, apparently their leader, spoke up again.

"A group of civilians breaking into a prison you got no business being in, got me thinking there ain't no place for us to go."

"Why don't you go find out?" Daryl's anger was rolling off of him.

"HEY, we ain't leaving!" The one in charge declared.

"You aren't coming in either!" T-Dog yelled as he emerged from behind the guard tower with a gun pointed.

The prisoner pointed his gun back.

Kate, relieved Daryl wasn't in there alone, hurried back to the cell Hershel was in to get Rick. The shouting had gotten loud enough for everyone to hear and Rick pulled himself away from Hershel's side to go deal with the problem. Kate stayed back.

"What's going on?" Beth asked, fear darkening her tear stained face.

"Prisoners. Five of them. One guy has a gun. He was saying this cell block was his. Daryl was telling them to leave, but they won't go." Kate explained.

The noise died down and they heard the door to the yard slam shut. Kate headed to the common room, but it was empty.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

\- Kate -

The fear-filled hours ticked by slowly as they monitored Hershel closely for any signs of fever. His bleeding had stopped, but he was still unconscious and with as much blood as he had lost, none of them felt very optimistic.

The bright spot of the day was when Rick and T-Dog returned to the cell block with food. They had struck a deal with the prisoners, half the rations in the cafeteria in exchange for helping clear out a different cell block for them to live in.

The idea of living in the prison with actual prisoners was terrifying. Kate wondered what each of them had done and whether they would be in any danger. The exchange she had witnessed between Daryl and their leader was troubling. He didn't seem reasonable and beyond that there was something sinister about him. But she trusted Rick, she didn't want them to kill anyone they didn't have to. She knew they had protected her so far and she would continue to rely on Rick's judgment.

The three men returned that afternoon exhausted and bloodied.

The second Rick walked into C Block, Carl blurted out, "Hershel stopped breathing. Mom saved him."

Everyone gathered in and around Hershel's cell, looking helplessly at their unconscious friend. Kate stood next to Daryl and Carl right outside the bars. Suddenly, as if knowing they were all surrounding him, Hershel's eyes fluttered and he slowly came to. Relief and happiness filled their dank quarters.

Lori stood quickly from her spot at the foot of his bed and left the cell. Rick followed a second later. In their excitement about Hershel, no one seemed to notice the couple slip away except for Daryl and Kate. They exchanged a hopeful look. They all had been dealing with the burden of Lori and Rick's fragile marriage, it hung over the group like a dark cloud. Every single one of them wanted to see a resolution, maybe they could finally start to rebuild in time for the baby to arrive.

As twilight took over the sky and the group finished off a satisfying meal of canned beef from their new stockpile, Rick approached Daryl and waved Kate over.

"Tonight was supposed to be T-Dog and Carol's night, but I'd like Carol to stay close by Hershel for now, just in case. Do you think you two could take guard tonight?"

Daryl nodded, "You got it."

Kate shook her head in agreement. Daryl turned to her, "I got first shift if that's alright with you. I'll come in and wake you up when it's your turn."

"Sure." She responded and he walked out the door.

Ever since Hershel and Rick had assigned guard duty, Kate was trying to psych herself up. Before the turn, Kate had been a big chicken. Anxious with an overactive imagination, she had the uncanny ability to come up with the worst-case scenario for any given situation. She kept telling herself how ridiculous it was to feel that way now. The worst-case scenario was that almost the entire population had turned into flesh eating creatures. Could it get worse? But now, her shift suddenly being hours away and the new knowledge of them sharing their space with prisoners of unknown crimes, her anxiety was getting the best of her. She was suddenly jealous that Maggie and Glenn had each other. They both just spent the entire night up there together.

After trying to sleep with no luck, she had an idea. She remembered Daryl saying last night that he didn't like the idea of sleeping in the cells. Maybe he would be willing to sleep in the guard tower at the end of his watch instead of heading back in. She wouldn't be afraid to be on the tower all night if Daryl was sleeping inside the shack. Would he be willing? Was it too much to ask? She thought she should go now and find out rather than wait for him to come inside to wake her. Once inside he might be inclined to stay. She stood up, put on her boots and wrapped a thin blanket around her shoulders. Grabbing her flashlight from the shelf in the cell, she crept out and headed down the stairs. She figured whoever was up with Hershel could let her out.

The yellow glow from the lantern in Hershel's cell gave off the only light. As she descended the stairs, she saw Maggie leaning against her father's bed.

"How's he doing Maggie?" Kate whispered, approaching the cell.

"So far, so good," Maggie gave her a tired smile. "He doesn't have a fever. He's in some pain though."

Kate frowned, the idea of Hershel in pain disturbed her.

"I'm so glad he doesn't have a fever, I think he would by now if he was going to, right?"

"I think so, but I'm afraid to hope." Maggie looked up at Kate and looked a little confused, "Where are you going? Its not time for your watch yet, is it?"

"Can't sleep. Thought I'd go ask Daryl something. Can you let me out?"

For once Maggie let an opportunity to tease her pass. Kate hadn't shared her feelings about Daryl with her friend, but she either picked up on it or enjoyed teasing her for no good reason. Maggie stood and grabbed the keys, following Kate to the door.

She said goodnight to Maggie and quietly headed out of the common area. She heard Maggie shut the door behind her and the lock clicked in place. Kate turned on her flashlight and tried to hold in her growing fear as she half ran to the outside door, leaping over the dead walkers they still hadn't had a chance to remove. She threw the door open with more force than necessary, forgetting how noisy it was, and made a run for the tower. Daryl's flashlight shone down in her direction.

"Somethin' wrong?" he shouted down from the railing of the guard shack.

"No, everything is fine." She said breathlessly as she reached the tower and opened the door. She started to climb the metal steps when Daryl swung the trap door at the top open, his flashlight in his mouth, and offered her a hand as she stepped into the shack.

"Hey. Thanks." She said, out of breath from her sprint across the yard, her adrenaline pumping.

She looked around the small, dark shack. It was a square shaped room with corrugated metal covering the bottom half of the walls with windows making up the top half. It was empty except for two prison bunk mattresses pushed together in one corner that Glenn and Maggie must've left here the night before.

"What's going on?" He asked, clearly trying to figure out what she was doing out here already. "Hershel ok?"

"Ya. Oh ya. Sorry. He's doing ok. In some pain, but no fever." Daryl winced a little and looked confused.

Kate faltered for a second. She hadn't thought about how she was going to ask him. Suddenly she felt extremely childish. After everything they had been through and witnessed since the turn and she was afraid of this. He was going to think she was ridiculous. She thought she was ridiculous.


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

– Daryl -

He was still standing there waiting for an explanation. She had burst out of the prison, blanket flapping around her like a cape. Her sudden appearance had sent a rush of adrenaline through him. Now she was standing here, her blonde hair glowing in the glare of his flashlight, chest rising and he still didn't know why.

"This is going to sound really ridiculous," She started, self consciously. "...but, especially after finding the prisoners, I'm really nervous about being out here by myself..."

Daryl eyed her suspiciously. Was she going to ask him to cover her shift too? After everything he had to do today, he was really looking forward to getting some sleep.

"I was wondering, I mean you mentioned yesterday you didn't want to sleep in a cage, so do you think you could sleep in here tonight while I do my watch out there?" She looked at him hopefully.

"I can do that," he said in his customary low growl. No expression on his face.

He was immediately rewarded with a beaming smile that did things to his insides. It was such a little thing she was asking for, but it obviously was a great relief to her. They stood there awkwardly for another second.

"Well, I better get back out there." He gestured to the outside with his head. "You stayin' in here to sleep or going back to the prison?"

"Do you mind some company?" She asked.

"Nope." He shut the trap door and walked out to the outer railing of the guard tower and she followed.

They stood quietly looking over the dark prison yard. She broke the silence first, as she often did.

"So, what happened today? With the prisoners?"

Daryl continued to look over the yard, keeping his eyes occupied.

"There were five of them. Been locked up in the cafeteria for 10 months. Guard stuck them in there with a gun when it all went down. One guy kind of put himself in charge. Kept talking all this shit about it being his prison and how we had to leave. He and Rick agreed that in exchange for half their food, we would help them clear out another block to live in."

"Makes me nervous." She piped in.

"Don't be." He said with force, looking into her eyes "Ain't going to let anything happen to you."

She smiled and that feeling burst through him again. It felt a lot like it did when he used to swing over the river in an old tire someone had hung when he was a kid. He looked quickly back at the dark prison yard.

"We start clearing the block and one of their guys, huge bastard, called him Tiny, he gets bit, or maybe just scratched, I don't know. They all start freaking out, demanding Rick do something and while Rick is trying to explain how it is, that prick with the gun goes up and beats Tiny to death with a crowbar."

Kate's eyes opened wide in surprise. "What?! His own guy?"

"Ya. Brutal. We kept on and this asshole is tryin' to kill Rick. Like for real, tryin' to make it look like an accident. Swingin' his weapon close to his head, throwin' a walker at him."

"What did you guys do?"

"Rick killed him. Had no choice. Another guy went runnin'. Rick chased him down and locked him outside with some walkers.

Kate was silent. Daryl continued.

"The other two, Axel and Oscar, they didn't give us any reason to not let them live. Left them to clean out their cell block. Rick warned them to stay away."

"Do you think they will?"

"Don't know. If they don't want Rick to kill them. But that's why it's even more important to keep watch." He looked back at the prison, almost like he had reminded himself they had to keep their eyes open.

"You said Hershel was in pain?"

"Ya. Maggie told me on my way out here."

"Maybe I can go on a run tomorrow. Take the bike, see if I can find a pharmacy."

"That's a good idea. Maggie and Beth would be so thankful."

"I'm going to head back in for a minute," Daryl gestured to the prison. "Gonna grab a mattress and a blanket. I ain't touchin' that bed in there."

Kate giggled. "Yeah, I'm sure they didn't mind the privacy up here."

He stilled and looked at her intensely and she quickly looked down at her feet.

"Better get going then." He threw his crossbow over his back. "If you can handle bein' by yourself out here for a few minutes."

She nodded and he headed into the shack.

Later that night Daryl stretched out on the bed he had made in the opposite corner of Maggie & Glenn's. He laid on his back, arm across his forehead, staring at the metal ceiling and trying his best to push the thought of her from his mind. It seemed inappropriate after today, a day where he witnessed the death of two men and someone he cared about have their leg axed off, but here he was with the thoughts of her making their way into his mind again. Just like they had been for so many nights since they left the farm. He wondered if he would have been so quick to agree to sleep up here if anyone else in the group had asked him or if it was just because it was her. He tried to convince himself he would have done it for anyone. That it had nothing to do with the feelings he had been telling himself he didn't, COULDN'T, have for her.

These days he found himself watching her a lot from across the room, sometimes she'd look over and catch his gaze and it was like a bolt of lightning. He didn't really know what to think of it and he had been trying his best to ignore it. It didn't help that she was currently only steps away. He wondered if she would've asked anyone else to sleep up here and then felt stupid that he even considered for a second that he was special to her. That she was asking him for any reason beyond her own fear. He knew there was no way a girl like Kate would be interested in a man like him. They certainly hadn't been before the turn and he thought it would take more than the dead walking to ever change that.

Still, he liked that he was helping her. Couldn't deny that. And the way she had looked at him when he said he would. It lit him up inside. Wasn't even a sacrifice for him anyway, he didn't mind sleeping out here. Might even prefer it. She could fulfill her watch duty and he would sleep in here as soundly as if he was inside.

Sleep came quickly after that and for the first time in a long time Daryl didn't wake when the sun came up. It was the big metal door of the prison banging against the cement as it was pushed open.

He saw Kate stand and go to the door, knocking softly.

"Come in." He called out, his voice raspier than normal. He sat up and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. She looked tired.

He heard T-Dog shout from below, "Kate, is Daryl up there?"

"I'm here." Daryl replied and then to her. "Better head down."

Daryl opened the trap door and motioned for Kate to lead the way and he climbed after her.

"Hershel doing ok this morning?" He heard her ask T-Dog.

"Yes, he's awake. No fever."

The three of them headed to the door of the prison, T-Dog opened the door and Kate went inside. As she walked through he gave Daryl a knowing smile.

"Don't even." Daryl growled, walking past the man and into the dark prison.

"I didn't say a word." T-Dog laughed, closing the door behind them.


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

\- Kate -

Kate was sitting at one of the common room tables with Maggie, Glenn and Beth when Daryl walked over.

"Was thinkin' 'bout goin' on a run, take the bike and see if I can find a pharmacy. Try and get some painkillers for your dad." He said to Maggie.

"Thank you Daryl. That would be great. I hate seeing him hurting."

Daryl nodded and looked over at Kate. "Wanna go with me?"

She was surprised he was asking, but quickly said yes.

"Be ready in 15 minutes. I'm gonna go talk to Rick and get the bike going."

He left them then, walking out the door and into the yard. Kate looked at Maggie but regretted it immediately.

"I take it whatever you had to talk to Daryl about in the middle of the night went well?" She said, mischief lighting up her face. Kate rolled her eyes. She should've known Maggie wouldn't let the opportunity pass.

"What?!" Maggie said feigning innocence. "I'm just askin'. You both spend the whole night up in the tower together and now he's askin' you on a run?"

"It's not like that Maggie. Who else is going to go with him? You, Beth and Carol need to stay with your Dad. Lori obviously can't. He's not going to take more men away when we need all the protection we can get here."

Maggie backed off. Kate provided a convincing argument; so much so that she felt disappointed herself. Of course that is why he asked her. It made perfect sense. Why did she let herself think for a minute it was because he was interested in her?

She headed back to her cell to grab her pack and added a few things from their make-shift kitchen.

Armed with her knife and gun, she headed out the main door and heard the roar of Daryl's bike. He was down by the gate with Rick and Carl.

She sprinted across the yard to them and threw her leg over the back of the bike. Rick and Carl opened the gates and she gave them a wave as they headed out.

"Hold on." Daryl shouted over his shoulder. She slipped her arms around his waist and he gave it gas, tearing out of the prison gate, quickly passing the clutch of walkers who had been drawn to them by the noise.

A few minutes later, they turned onto a main road and Daryl picked up speed. Kate relaxed a little when the number of walkers started to dwindle and there were patches of road where they didn't see any at all. It was during those moments when she wondered how life had led her here - hurtling helmetless on the back of a chopper in the middle of nowhere, her arms around a Georgia redneck.

About an hour on the road and Daryl pulled off into a small town, she had spotted a Walgreen's sign off the highway a while back and was surprised when he didn't stop.

"There was a Walgreens." She shouted above the engine's roar.

"Naw. Picked through a long time ago." He had shouted back over his shoulder.

They drove up a few blocks lined with small stores until they came to a small medical building. In peeling white vinyl across the plate glass window it read, "Rhodes Pharmacy". He parked the bike and she climbed off the back. She looked at him expectantly when he stayed put.

"I was thinkin'." He began. "If you wanted, I don't see any reason I couldn't sleep in the tower while you're on watch. If it helps."

"Yes! Thank you!" She said and in an effort to not make him too uncomfortable, she suppressed the desire to throw her arms around him. "That is such a relief."

He stood and swung his leg off the bike and headed for the building. He knocked on the door a few times and almost immediately two walkers were pressing their faces against the glass, jaws snapping open and shut and their rotting fingers slipping. Kate took a step back.

"Good sign." He motioned towards the walkers. "Maybe no one has been in here yet."

He looked around the sidewalk and found a large rock in some weeds.

"Get your knife out."

With a grunt he hurled the rock through the large plate glass window. In the moment it took for the walkers to make their way through the shards of glass, Daryl had his bow aimed and took the first one out easily. He moved forward quickly and buried his knife deep in the skull of the second one before casting the body to the side. He loaded his bow again, turned and held his hand up to her. She understood he wanted her to wait and she eyed their surroundings, hoping the shattering glass hadn't drawn the attention of any more walkers.

Daryl crept in slowly, and surveyed the store quickly before motioning her in. Kate gingerly stepped thorugh the window and looked around the dark store. It was small and although it wasn't untouched, there was enough stuff remaining that she thought they might find some useful things.

"I'll go look behind the counter." Daryl said. "See if I can find anything for Hershel. You check out the rest of the place, looks like there's some good shit here."

Kate started down the first aisle, opening her empty backpack. She filled it with some bandaids, gauze, rubbing alcohol, bars of soap, tiny bottles of travel sized shampoo and lotion, condoms (hey, at least Glenn and Maggie could use them.), Kleenex and all the toothbrushes and toothpaste they had left. A lot of this stuff seemed like a luxury, they had gone without it for so long, but it was here and maybe they'd be at the prison long enough to make use of it all. Maybe they could use one of the cages in the common room to store supplies like this that they found on runs.

She was a little wrapped up in daydreaming about what could be and didn't even notice the walker that was pinned to the ground by a fallen shelf until she stepped right in front of it. It grabbed her ankle with its outstretched hand and she screamed. The creature had gripped her tightly, trying desperately to gnaw through her boot. She tried to step back and fell to the ground, simultaneously kicking and trying to pull her knife. She heard Daryl yelling her name and scrambling over the counter. She wrenched her leg free and dragged herself backwards down the slick linoleum floor. She heard the thrum of an arrow and the walker fell silent forever.

Daryl rushed down the aisle towards her and hit his knees as she tried to scramble to stand.

"Kate? You ok? Did you get bit?" He demanded, his voice cracking.

"I'm ok. I'm ok." She gasped, holding onto his arms for support and trying to catch her breath. Her hands were shaking badly and her knees felt weak.

"That was a close one." She said, taking a deep breath and hoping she didn't sound as scared as she was.

He pulled away from her suddenly and took a few steps back. His face twisted into a scowl. "Damn girl, pay attention!" He turned to head back towards the pharmacy counter, and shouted over his shoulder. "You're gonna get yourself killed."

His annoyance took her by surprise and her fear quickly turned to anger.

"I'm sorry," She bit back. "I was under the impression you'd cleared the store."

She said it to his back and he wheeled around quickly. This time it was more than annoyance contorting his features. He was angry, she could see it in the set of his shoulders and his eyes were narrowed into slits.

"I ain't your babysitter." He spat, taking a few angry steps towards her and pointing to his head. "Use your brain. Can't just go around expectin' everyone else to keep ya safe."

She heard the words and they stung. She immediately thought of his willingness to keep watch with her and she felt abashed, but she could see doubt in his face too, although she didn't know what it meant.

She looked back at the walker laying still on the linoleum floor of the pharmacy and saw Daryl's crossbow bolt sticking out at an angle from its temple.

"Use your brain Daryl" She said mimicking the insult he had just hurled at her. "You don't have an unlimited supply of these arrows."

She thundered over to the walker, feeling Daryl's eyes on her the whole time, and reached down to rip it out of its head. She'd seen Daryl do it a million times over the last several months and she thought she might throw it at him to make her point. She grasped the arrow firmly and yanked hard, but it slipped right out of her grip and she took a clumsy step back into the shelf. Her face turned red and her hand began to sting. She reached down again, this time with both hands and pulled. Nothing. She pulled harder, and finally, with a great deal of effort managed to free the bolt from the walker's skull. She looked up to see Daryl grinning at her. It was a smart ass grin and at first she really did think she'd hurl the arrow at him, but then she realized how ridiculous the whole scene had been and she started to laugh.

"You done?" He asked, a hint of laughter in his voice and all the anger gone.

Kate walked towards him and put the bolt in his open hand.

Her mouth curled into a smirk. "Yes. I am and from now on I'll leave the arrows to you."

"Probably a good idea."

He headed for the pharmacy counter again and Kate followed him. It didn't take long for them to finish going through the shelves. They found a couple of bottles that either had instructions that seemed to be related to pain, "Take two as needed every four hours", or some more common painkillers and antibiotics they even recognized the names of. Codeine, Vicodin, Amoxicillin were all loaded up into Daryl's pack and they headed back out the front, looked around for walkers, climbed onto the bike and started back to the prison.


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6

\- Daryl -

Daryl leaned against the railing of the guard tower and lit a cigarette. He inhaled as he scanned the fences and woods surrounding the prison. Walkers peppered the gates, clawing and moaning. Kate had taken the first shift while he slept on the makeshift bed in the corner of the guard shack. When she had come to wake him up for his turn, she knocked softly, but he was already awake and putting his vest back on. He stood and opened the door, "Ready to get some sleep?"

"So ready." She yawned. After their adventures at the pharmacy today he wasn't surprised. They'd ridden back to the prison in silence, not that they would've been able to hear each other very well over the roar of the engine anyway, but it had given him plenty of time to ruminate on how badly he'd fucked things up.

"Anything interesting out here?" He couldn't think of anything else to say to fill the silence.

"Nope." She glanced at Maggie and Glenn's bed in the corner and then at Daryl's. "Do you mind if I use your bed?"

He looked at her flatly, trying not to betray the thoughts that were racing through his brain. He shrugged and mumbled, "'s'fine" before quickly walking outside. Truth was, at that moment the thought of her sleeping in his bed took his breath away. He leaned against the railing and fished in his pocket for a lighter, trying his best to keep his thoughts off the girl that occupied most of them. Knowing she was curled up in his bed just a few feet away made it more difficult than it already was and he cursed himself for not being able to control his emotions.

He'd guessed she must've forgiven him for the pharmacy because she was acting like nothing had happened. He wished it was as easy for him to forgive himself. He couldn't even clear the fucking store, almost getting her killed because of it and then, like an asshole, he blamed her. Truth was, it had scared the shit out of him. He hated to admit it, even to himself, but in that moment when he saw her on the ground he couldn't pretend he didn't have feelings for her. He had no business having them and he knew it. The fact that he seemed unable to stop them pissed him off even more. He'd reacted like he normally did when emotions were at play, he got angry. Except he hadn't expected for her to fight back, drawing attention to his failure.

He figured about an hour had passed when he heard the door to the shack open. He looked up to see her walking towards him with sleepy eyes. The moonlight behind her was lighting up her frizzy blonde hair like a halo.

"Couldn't sleep?" He asked. She gave him a weak smile and shook her head.

"Dream woke me." She said, a trace of sorrow in her voice. Daryl leaned against the outer wall of the shack and slid down.

"Nightmare?"

She moved to sit next to him, so close he could smell her. How she managed to still smell so good when they all so rarely could bathe was beyond him.

"It wasn't a nightmare exactly. I dreamed I was home, with my family."

That same sad smile found its way to her face again and he found a part of him wanting so badly to comfort her, but not knowing how. The only person he had to miss was Merle, and he did, in his own way, but he imagined it was a lot different than someone who was separated by thousands of miles with no way of knowing if they were dead or alive.

"Ya miss them a lot, huh?"

She looked at him then, like this whole conversation was unexpected. Of course it was. Daryl didn't usually ask a lot of personal questions. He was surprising them both quite a bit these days.

"I do." She said simply. "Mostly it's the not knowing and how hard it must be for them to not know about me."

"Do ya miss your boyfriend?"

He didn't know much about this part of her story, only knew that was why she had been in Georgia. He didn't even know the reason they had been separated, just that she was trying to get back to her family that night Atlanta was bombed. She looked at him again, questioning his newly found conversational skills before replying.

"No." She paused. "Is that bad?"

He shrugged and looked away into the darkness.

She continued, "We had only been together about six months when it happened. He was a great guy, but I hardly knew him. I've known all of you guys longer. Care about you all more too. You guys are all I have left in this world."

The weight of that statement hit him. It sounded a lot like responsibility and commitment and he hadn't had a lot of either in his life before the turn. He imagined it was true for all of them in this makeshift family they had formed, even for him, but it was a different thing hearing it said out loud. They grew quiet after that, sitting side-by-side, the silence stretching on for a while. She was hardly ever this quiet. Then he noticed her head nodding and all at once it fell softly against his shoulder. She was asleep. Daryl froze. He had been touched by her before, she was holding onto him tightly on the bike just this morning, but this was different somehow. Vulnerable. He stayed there with her until the sun started its slow glow in the distance and the metal door to the prison screeched open. As Rick walked out, Kate rose her head quickly from Daryl's shoulder. She looked at him guiltily, wiping what he was sure was drool from the corner of her mouth and still managing to look beautiful doing it.

"I guess I fell asleep. Sorry about that."

"'s'nothing."

Except it kind of was. He knew that. She knew that. There had been a shift between them that night. He was no longer going to be able to push down those feelings he had for her, but whatever it was that passed between them, he still couldn't imagine her ever considering being with some backwoods redneck like him. He knew he didn't deserve her.

She had started to climb back to the ground while he stood at the top. She crossed the yard and waved to Rick as they exchanged good mornings. As she slid the door to the prison open she looked behind her, up at the tower and gave a smile before disappearing into the prison. Daryl looked down at Rick, who was looking back up at him with humor in his face. Daryl scowled and headed for the ladder.


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER 7

\- Kate -

The next few days were calm ones for the group at the prison. Hershel was improving everyday and there was no sign of infection. The remaining prisoners had stayed clear of them, which was a relief. They had spent a lot of time cleaning out the block, as well as starting on the yard, but that was going to take more time. Lori was overdue and everyone was holding their breath, waiting for the baby to be born. It was a stress they all shared and they would all be relieved when the baby had arrived safely. Carol had practiced performing C-sections on walkers, but she was hoping Hershel would somehow be well enough in time.

Living in close quarters, it was hard to miss anything, and the group had all noticed Daryl and Kate had been different with one another. Neither had any idea that it was obvious and no one dared say anything to either of them - except for Maggie. She teased Kate frequently just to see her friend squirm.

"It's not like that Maggie." She would always sigh, paranoid that someone would overhear them.

For her part, Kate knew she had developed feelings for Daryl, but she was pretty sure she wasn't the kind of girl Daryl would want. She was younger than him, less worldly. He sometimes made her feel like a kid, with her fears and her lack of independence. He seemed to do so well on his own and she was in desperate need of the group. Besides, Daryl seemed the type that would run at the first hint of emotion. They were trying to survive here, the last thing she needed to do was complicate things with something like this. She was content to keep her feelings to herself, if only Maggie would let her.

The next night, they had watch. Daryl was already up in the tower by the time Kate got there. He was leaning against the railing, leg bent, with his crossbow resting in his lap.

"Anything going on out there?" She asked, not expecting anything different.

"Few more walkers these past few days, might be a problem eventually."

They both watched the dead paw at the fence line as the sky darkened. A small gust of wind blew through and Kate pulled her sweater closed.

"Weather is starting to change. It's going to get cold soon."

"You've lived in Georgia your whole life?" She inquired.

"Yup. Never left. Not once."

"Really?" She said, surprised. He looked at her with a hint of defensiveness in his eyes.

"No reason to." He changed the subject quickly. "What about you? You always out in California?"

"Ya, I was born there, but I have family in Arkansas. I've spent plenty of summers staying at their farm."

"You're kidding?" Daryl snorted, with a half smile on his mouth.

"Nope. I've even had chiggers once." She said with a big grin. "Why? Does that surprise you?"

"Ya. Doesn't fit with how I've been picturing your life before. Prissy California girl - beaches and movie stars."

Over the years, she'd heard all the misconceptions people held about California.

She laughed, "Sorry to disappoint you, never liked the beach and I've never met a single famous person. What else do you think you've figured out?"

Daryl shrugged. "College girl. Boyfriend. Nice family." He guessed.

"My family isn't as nice as you might think..."

He just looked back at her chewing on his thumbnail.

"Don't get me wrong. I have a great mom, brothers. My Dad, he's another story. He never grew up. He wasn't around much, when he was he just yelled. He was out of work a lot too. Utilities were always being turned off, we were evicted once, lost our home. I'm pretty sure we ate nothing but peanut butter and jelly for two years straight."

Daryl was looking at her like he was trying to figure something out.

"What about you?" she asked. She didn't know if he'd answer, she wasn't sure, but she had a feeling Daryl's background was an uncomfortable subject for him. Daryl and Merle didn't come off as people who had had easy lives. They were surviving long before the rest of them had to.

"Not much to tell." Daryl said quietly. "My Mom died when I was just a kid. She probably wasn't the best mom, but I knew she loved me in her own way. After she died, it was pretty much just me and Merle - and he was off in juvy or the army most the time."

"What about your Dad?" She asked, troubled at the image of a young Daryl fending for himself.

"My old man wasn't around much. Better when he wasn't. He was a drunk - a mean one too. He probably would make your Dad look like 'Father of the Year'. But Merle and I took off when I was 16 and it's just been us since then."

"You miss him a lot? Merle?"

"Ya. I mean, Merle has his problems. But he's my brother. Only person whoever gave a damn about me. Ya, I miss him."

"Well maybe he's still out there. You never know Daryl. You Dixons seem to be really good at surviving. Stranger things have happened. Rick found Lori and Carl."

"And what if I do find him? What then? You think the group is just gonna welcome him back with open arms? I mean, you met him."

She smiled, remembering his crude brother.

"Yes, I did. Called me Goldilocks the whole time."

"Better than what he called Andrea. He snorted.

"Sugar tits!" Kate remembered. They both laughed. "But Daryl, he's your brother. That makes him our family too. If you found him, we'd all be OK with that. We would all welcome him because we all want you to be happy."

Daryl looked at her intensely, biting at the inside of his lip, before looking away to break the connection as he mumbled a thank you.


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

– Kate -

Daryl climbed quietly down from the tower in an effort to let Kate sleep longer. Neither of them had slept much last night, they had both stayed awake talking about a lot of things: hunting, Daryl's chupacabra, the Shane/Rick/Lori triangle. Sometime around dawn she had started to fall asleep, curled up on the bunk mattress they had been taking turns sleeping on.

Kate woke up a short time later and made her way to the common room. Everyone was busy eating their milkless cereal and barely looked up when she came in minutes after Daryl. She grabbed an orange prison bowl and sat down next to Glenn, ignoring the teasing twinkle in Maggie's eyes.

As the group finished up breakfast, Lori, Beth and Carl made their way back to the cell to see how Hershel was doing. He'd been improving faster than anyone had hoped and with the help of some crutches they'd found in the prison infirmary, they hoped to get him up and moving today.

The rest of the group slowly made their way out to the yard, intending to finally get all of the walker bodies burned and the yard clear of debris.

They were standing on the gravel path that lead from the courtyard to the entrance gate, laughing at Glenn and Maggie's expense and waiting for the couple to head down from the guard tower where they thought they'd escaped for some privacy. Everyone was in good spirits, buoyed by Hershel's continued improvement and the fact that they'd had food in their bellies for several days.

"Hey Rick", T-Dog said, the sudden concern in his voice disturbing the light hearted mood.

Rick turned to see what T-Dog had spotted and his face went stoney with anger. The rest of them followed his stare and saw Axel and Oscar, the remaining prisoners, making their way to them. Axel had his arms folded in front of him and Oscar looked unsure of the situation, as if it wasn't his idea and he might be shot by Rick as promised just for showing their faces. Rick marched forward, ordering Daryl and T to his side.

"That's close enough." Rick growled as they approached. "We had an agreement."

"Please mister." Axel started pathetically. "We know that. We made a deal. But you've got to understand. We can't live in that place another minute, you follow me? All the bodies. People we knew. Blood, brains everywhere. There're ghosts!"

"Why didn't you move the bodies out?" Daryl asked. Carol and Kate had caught up and were standing at a cautious distance.

"You should be burning them." Added T-Dog.

"We tried. We did." Axel returned.

"The fence is down on the far side of the prison." Oscar finally spoke up. "Every time we drag a body out those things just line up, droppin' a body and just running back inside."

"Look!" Axel said emphatically, taking a step forward. "We had nothin' to do with Tomas and Andrew. Nothin'. You trying to prove a point, you proved it bro! We'll do whatever it takes to be part of your group, just please, please, don't make us live in that place."

"Our deal is not negotiable." Rick said sternly. "You either live in your cell block or you leave."

"I told you this was a waste of time." Oscar said to Axel. "They ain't no different than the pricks who shot up our boys. Know how many friend's corpses we had to drag out this week? Just threw them out like, these were good guys! Good guys who had our backs against the really bad dudes in the joint, like Tomas and Andrew. Now we've all made mistakes to get in here Chief, and I'm not gonna pretend to be a saint, but believe me, we've paid our due, enough that we would rather hit the road than to go back into that shit hole."

Rick and Oscar stared each other down. Kate felt compassion for what they were saying, but she wasn't sure that meant she wanted them sleeping in their cell block. She was thankful again that the choice wasn't her's.

Rick looked back at Daryl who shook his head no. Rick sighed.

"The road it is then. Daryl, lock them on the outside of the first gate. We'll get you some food and water. Last you a few days." Rick had made his decision.

Daryl led the two men outside the gate, shut and locked it.

"Come on dude." Axel pleaded as Daryl stalked away from them and approached the group.

Poor T-Dog was conflicted. Hell, they all were. No one liked this choice, but they liked the idea of being vulnerable even less. Kate appreciated T-Dog speaking up. Part of her agreed with him. It reminded her of when they were back at the farm and Dale was trying to convince the group that they didn't have to kill Randall. She had sided with Dale on that one, but this was different. The prisoners could choose to stay in their cellblock and even the road wasn't certain death. They had choices this time, just not good ones.

They got back to work. Rick decided they should pull their vehicles around to the upper yard so they'd be ready if they ever needed to get out fast. He sent Maggie, Carol and T to handle that while he asked Daryl, Kate and Glenn to follow him out to the dog run. The hole that they'd cut in the fence the day they arrived was tied up with wire and Glenn unwound it so they could exit out into the woods to collect firewood to burn the bodies. Rick figured one big fire would be worth the attention it might attract if they could be rid of them.

They gathered firewood quickly and returned to the dog run and Kate tossed the branches she'd collected to the ground and held the gap in the links open to let Rick, Daryl and Glenn back in with their armfuls of wood. She heard the rolling metal door to C Block slowly open and turned her head to see a slow moving Hershel being led down the steps by Lori. Everyone brightened at the site of him up again.

"Man, he is one tough son of a bitch." Glenn said, clearly impressed. "ALRIGHT HERSHEL!" he yelled, earning him a scolding glare from Daryl who pointed out walkers heading towards the prison from the woods.

Everyone had stopped to admire his progress, their spirits raised with this victory, until they spotted the walkers. Dozens of them began pouring from around the prison buildings.

Even from though they were on the other side of the yard, they could hear Carl scream "Walkers!" and watched in horror as he and Lori turned and began shooting.

"NO!" was the single word that ripped from Rick's throat as he went tearing down the dog run.

Daryl, Glenn and Kate followed.

"Get the hole!" Glenn yelled back at Kate, who turned and ran back to lace up and secure the dog run from the walkers. Her fingers shook as she tried to loop the wire through the chain links. She heard more gunfire and knew that Maggie, T-Dog and Carol must have joined the fight. She kept looking over her shoulder, willing Rick, Daryl and Glenn to get to the yard quicker.

She pulled the wire tight, tied a knot and went sprinting through the run towards the prison. She saw Maggie, Lori and Carl disappear behind the sliding door to the cellblock. She was relieved to see Hershel and Beth had managed to secure themselves in a gated entryway to the opposite block.

Rick, Daryl and Glenn had just reached the end of the run and headed up the gravel drive with Axel and Oscar close behind when sirens suddenly blared from speakers she didn't know existed. She reflexively covered her ears to the deafening sound. Rick started shooting the boxes before angrily approaching Oscar and Axel who looked as confused as she was. Kate got there just as Rick demanded they follow him into the prison. Daryl turned and pointed at her, "YOU stay right here." He commanded.

"I can help!" She yelled back, knife in hand.

"No! No way! I ain't gonna worry about you too. STAY. HERE."

Kate froze in her tracks. They all disappeared into C Block. Kate climbed the steps up to where Hershel and Beth were safely enclosed. Beth was white as a ghost.

"What happened?" Kate screamed over the blaring noise.

"Gate wasn't closed. Glenn said the lock had been hacked open." Beth replied, straining to be heard over the sirens.

"Hacked open?! By who?" Kate was bewildered, she didn't get the impression Oscar or Axel would do such a thing. "Is everyone ok?"

Beth shook her head, her eyes tearing up.

"T-Dog was bit." Hershel began. "We couldn't tell if anyone else was. We don't think so. He and Carol headed into the prison."

Their conversation ended there. With the siren still blaring, it was too much of an effort. Besides, there was nothing more to talk about. All they could do was wait. Kate paced around the yard, tears streaming down her face at the thought of T-Dog being bit, knife remaining in her hand. She took a closer look at the downed walkers, making sure there wouldn't be any surprises like at the pharmacy. After a long while, the siren stopped. Her ears were still ringing, but it was a relief. She looked out at the perimeter. There was a large increase in the number of walkers and they were still flooding in from the woods. Finally Rick, Glenn, Daryl, Oscar and Axel came running out.

"Hershel?!" Rick cried.

"You didn't find them?" Hershel asked, desperation in his voice.

"We thought maybe they came back out here." Glenn replied, only to be met with them all shaking their heads.

"What about T? Carol?" Hershel inquired.

"They didn't make it." This time it was Daryl who spoke up.

Rick turned to him and growled, "That doesn't mean the others didn't!" He said, "We're going back! Daryl and Glenn you come..."

Rick halted mid-sentence as the unmistakable wail of a newborn echoed off the cement walls. They all turned to see a bloodied Maggie exit C Block carrying Lori's baby in her arms. Carl followed slowly behind, head hanging and his gun held loosely at his side. The axe Rick had been holding fell from his hands. It hit the cement with a clunk. Kate heard him try to form the words to ask where Lori was. Maggie's sobs were answer enough. He went to Carl, crying, "No, no, no..." and he fell to the ground.


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

\- Kate -

Later that night, Kate and Glenn stood on the guard tower entrance to the prison. Daryl and Maggie had left almost immediately to find formula for the baby. A girl. It was dark now and they were waiting on their return. Axel and Oscar had been dutifully killing walkers through the fence since Daryl had delegated that chore to them before he left.

After Maggie and Carl had appeared with the squalling baby, Rick had collapsed and Daryl took the lead. Rick retreated into the depths of the prison with an axe and hadn't emerged since. Glenn had tried to go after him when he wasn't back after an hour or so, but Rick wasn't leaving and Glenn said he was acting out of his mind. Hershel, Beth and Carl headed back to C Block to try and comfort the baby.

Glenn and Kate dragged the four walkers that had been killed in the block earlier out and started to dig graves for T, Lori and Carol. Eventually Oscar and Axel had come to offer their help and Glenn and Kate found themselves waiting anxiously for Daryl and Maggie's return.

"Almost like old times, me and you hanging out." Kate offered weakly. "Too bad everything sucks. Glenn, what the hell happened?"

"It was one of the prisoners." Seeing the confusion cross her face, Glenn quickly added, "Not Axel or Oscar. One of the ones we thought was dead. I guess he managed to escape. He broke the lock on the gate, turned on the alarms. Daryl, Oscar and Rick came across him in the generator room. Tried to take Rick's head off with an axe. Oscar shot him."

"What about T & Carol?" She wasn't sure she wanted to know, but she had to ask.

"We found what was left of T inside. Walkers were still on him. There wasn't anything left of Carol, just her scarf next to T-Dog. Daryl found it."

"Oh my God Glenn." Kate covered her mouth as she started to cry. After all they had been through, the things they had done, the precautions they had taken and like that, in a blink of an eye, almost a third of their group was gone.

"Back at the quarry camp..." Kate said thickly, sniffling, "T-Dog was the first one to really make me feel welcome. He had that huge church van, I remember he was telling me he knew we'd be alright. That God had brought us together for a reason. We used to play checkers in the back of the van, I swear he let me win everytime."

They both laughed, remembering the first few days they'd spent together as a group. It had kind of been the three of them in the beginning. It was probably because they bonded over being alone. None of them had any family or friends with them. They had to look out for each other.

About an hour later, after Axel and Oscar had joined them at the fences, they heard the roar of Daryl's bike and he and Maggie came into view, blasting through the open gate before Oscar quickly closed it behind them. Glenn and Kate hurried down the tower steps and out into the yard as Daryl drove the bike to the upper yard. Kate and Glenn met them there and Glenn and Maggie held each other for a long time while Kate and Daryl looked at each other awkwardly.

"Any luck?" She broke the silence with a dumb question, knowing Daryl wouldn't have come back without food for the baby.

"Daycare - got some formula, bottles. It ain't much, but it'll do for a couple of days. Buy us some time. How'd it go here?"

Maggie and Glenn had broken apart and the four of them made their way to the sliding door to C-Block, Axel and Oscar behind them. Hershel and Glenn decided earlier the men had earned the right to stay, at least in the common area for now.

"Rick is still inside somewhere. Glenn tried to go after him."

Daryl shook his head. "Poor bastard."

As they got closer to the cellblock, they could hear her cries. Daryl entered first and immediately scooped the crying baby from Carl's arms. Maggie called her sister to her side and started emptying the bag to make a bottle with the supplies they had found.

Daryl stood with the fussing bundle in his arms, swaying a little as if he'd done it a million times before. Beth handed him the bottle of formula and Daryl spoke softly to the infant as she found the bottle and began to drink. Daryl's face broke out in a rare grin. He looked around the room and his joy was infectious. They all smiled as the man they all thought was least likely to have a soft spot for babies, rocked their newest family member in his arms.

Kate felt her heart swell. It wasn't with the lustful thoughts she had been experiencing towards him, or even the silly idea of a crush. After today that would feel inappropriate, but instead it was the realization of a deeper feeling she had for him. One she had been fighting, unknowingly, for a while. Standing there in their dark little home, watching him beam at the baby girl, she knew she loved this man.

The next morning came early for everyone. Even if they could've slept after the events of the day, the baby woke every couple hours. Kate, Beth and Maggie took turns, sometimes all getting up at the same time. Carl was a devoted big brother, he woke up as often as they did. Glenn and Daryl took watch, both of them finding this a better choice than baby duty. Rick remained in the bowels of the prison and all they could do was hope for the best.

When Daryl came in for breakfast, he found Kate at their make-shift kitchen, shaking a bottle of formula.

"How's little ass kicker doing today?" He asked, using the nickname he'd bestowed on the nameless baby the night before.

"Pretty good. Eating. Crying." She smiled, tired.

"How're you?" He asked in a way that made her feel like he really wanted to know.

"I'm ok." She said, more to convince herself, shaking her head up and down and taking a deep breath. "How are you?"

"I'm worried about Rick. He been up here?"

"I haven't seen him." She said sadly.

"What about Carl?" He looked around to see if there was any sign of the kid.

"He's doing great with the baby. Seems really devoted to her."

Daryl shook his head like the answer made sense and satisfied him all at once. With bow slung over his back, he grabbed a mug of black coffee in one hand and stuck the bowl of dry cereal in his teeth as he turned and headed back out to the yard.

The day inched along, mostly because the cloud of Lori, T and Carol's deaths hung so heavily around the group. They had lost so many over the last year that death was different now, it didn't hurt less - it was just that it was expected. Before this life, she hadn't had anyone close to her die. Mourning was a feared mystery. Now she was almost used to it. Although she wasn't sure anyone could ever say they were used to it exactly. These days it happened all the time and they had to move on if they were going to survive. They didn't forget the dead - there were many times in the months since they left the quarry that stories would be told and retold. They would all smile and remember. At night too, when it was quiet, Kate always thought of the ones who were gone - or missing. She knew the others did too. But days like today, when the losses were fresh, it hung on them all like wet clothes. They mourned personally, they mourned for Rick, Carl and a baby who would never know her mother, and they mourned the sense of security they had begun to believe they had.

The men worked in the yard, trying to finish the job they started yesterday. Maggie and Kate took turns lending a hand when they were needed, but mostly they stayed inside helping with the baby and preparing meals. They saw little of Rick. Lunch was quiet. Everyone was tired, dejected, struggling internally. Daryl took his meal outside again, this time without a word or glance her way. She felt ridiculous to be wounded by such an imagined slight when the reality of their situation was so much worse, but she couldn't help it.

Later that night, at dinner, they were all serving themselves the latest creation of canned beans and corn from a big stockpot they found in the cafeteria. Kate had just ladled out a big spoonful into her bowl when Axel approached her.

"Well hi!" He said enthusiastically. "Mind if I sit with you?"

"Sure." She said with an easy smile.

Either he was full of Southern charm or still trying to convince them all he was a good guy. Kate headed to a table with Maggie and Glenn and sat down. Axel sat in the empty seat to her right, but instead of digging into his meal, he just sat there looking at her with a huge grin on his face. She glanced up from her spoonful of beans, caught his stare and laughed nervously,

"What?" she asked.

"Excuse me if I'm staring. You are just the prettiest thing I've seen in a long time."

Kate forced a short laugh, but Glenn literally snorted on the apple juice he was drinking. Kate muttered thanks and tried her best to kick Glenn under the table. Maggie saved the day by quickly asking Axel about the area of Georgia he was from and their meal continued without further incident outside of Axel watching Kate intently.

Kate stood to collect her dishes and offered to collect everyone else's too. Axel rose quickly,

"Let me help you with those," he offered in what she assumed was supposed to be his most gentlemanly voice.

"Oh no. Thank you, really, I've got it." She tried to discourage him politely.

"No, no, I insist." He said, his mustache twitching above his smile. She smiled weakly and they headed towards the washbasin. She threw a "help me" look over her shoulder at Maggie and Glenn who had both started laughing uncontrollably. She made a mental note to kick their asses later.

They handed the dishes off to Carl, who had volunteered to take kitchen duty that evening. Just when Kate thought she could escape politely and hide in her cell, Axel leaned against the wall in front of her.

"So." He began, with that grin still plastered across his face. "Do you have an arrangement with any of the men in the group already?"

Her mouth fell open. "Excuse me?" She said, genuinely confused.

"Do you belong to any of the men here?"

As the meaning of his words became clear, she was amazed at his forwardness and offended at his archaic view on the matter. She was about to answer when, seemingly out of nowhere, Daryl stepped between them. With gritted teeth and his finger poking into Axel's chest, Daryl growled,

"That ain't none of your concern. Now go on and leave her alone!"

"I'm sorry Daryl. I truly am." Axel sputtered, his face changing to red and he slipped away quietly.

They both watched him go and saw the rest of their group had all been silent observers to the little bit of drama. Daryl seemed suddenly embarrassed. Like all at once angry clouds had cleared and he realized he had maybe overreacted. He took a couple steps away before looking back at her with a scowl and storming off outside again. She just watched him go, baffled. She looked over at Maggie and found her friend looking back at her with wide, questioning and thoroughly amused eyes. Kate just shook her head in response. What had just happened?

The night was long and much like the one before. She, Maggie and Beth took turns with the baby while Glenn, Daryl, now joined by Oscar and Axel in a nearby tower, hid from the crying by staying on guard all night.

Truth be told, Beth had taken most the responsibility for the baby on herself. Maggie and Kate were only filling in now so she could get some sleep too.

That night, sitting on the bottom bunk, Maggie held the baby in her arms, feeding her formula. Kate sat next to her, marvelling at just how tiny she was and wondering what they would do if they couldn't find enough formula.

Maggie turned to Kate, her eyebrows raised over her big green eyes and whispered, "So what's going on with you and Daryl?"

"Me and Daryl?" Kate squeaked. "Nothing that I know of."

"Really?" Maggie returned unconvinced "Don't hold out on me girl. I've seen the way he watches you across the room when he thinks no one is watching. You guys are up there doing watch together every other night and he almost killed poor Axel tonight when he started flirting with you."

Both girls stifled their laughter at the thought of Axel's attempts at flirting and the yet unnamed infant in Maggie's arms stirred a little.

"I swear Mags - nothing is going on." Maggie remained doubtful. Kate continued, "I have NO idea what that was with Axel and afterwards it was like he was angry with me. He's been acting so different since what happened..." She trailed off guiltily.

Maggie was quiet for a second. "Kate," she began gently. "You have feelings for him?"

Kate weighed the consequences of admitting her feelings to Maggie and decided she might like to have someone to talk to about it.

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't." At this confession Maggie's face broke into a huge grin.

"Don't say anything Maggie!" Kate pleaded. "I don't want him or anyone else to know. There is NO way Daryl Dixon would even think about it. He has more important things to do - like keep us all alive and fed! My GOD! Lori, T-Dog and Carol just died. I feel so selfish for even talking about this."

She looked at Maggie horrified and desperate before covering her face with her hands.

"Selfish?" Maggie practically spat the word. "For what? Trying to live? Kate, we all deserve a little happiness in this world and if you can find some with Daryl then that is great."

"Maggie, believe me, he is NOT interested. It is all one sided." Kate said deflated.

"You sure about that?" she said sweetly.


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

Kate

Breakfast was a silent affair. Their orange prison spoons scraping bowls, scooping up flavorless oatmeal. A little squeak or grunt from the sleeping baby in Beth's arms. They had found little stools in the guard shacks that they could pull up to add more people to each table and so most of them were crowded around one - Beth with the baby, Hershel, Maggie, Glenn, Carl and Kate.

Daryl and Oscar sat on the stoop leading to the yard. Kate watched Daryl. He seemed preoccupied with Carl this morning. Rick was still wandering the inner prison and his son was doing a valiant job of holding it together, but between his father's absence and having to have a hand in his mother's death, it wouldn't surprise her if Carl started acting out. She was glad Daryl seemed to be keeping tabs on the situation. She imagined if Carl eventually did need to talk to someone, or worse, went off the rails, Daryl would be a good one to handle the kid.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the iron door that led to the rest of the prison swinging open and Rick walking in. The look on his face, the way a nervous energy moved through his fingers, reminded her of a different Rick. The Rick that seven months ago stood and told them he killed his best friend for them. It wasn't the focused leader who had helped them survive out there or found them their new home. This Rick made her uneasy. She watched him walk to Carl's side.

"Everybody ok?" He asked while they all stared at him like he was a wild animal.

"Ya. We are." Maggie offered.

"What about you?" Hershel was the only one that dared ask the question everyone wanted an answer to.

Rick dodged the question.

"Cleared out the boiler block."

"How many were there?" Daryl asked from his spot on the steps. He looked a little pissed off, but he didn't call Rick out.

"I don't know. Dozen. Two dozen. I have to get back. Just wanted to check on Carl." He patted Carl on the back, turned and headed towards the gate. Glenn stood up and called after him.

"Rick, we can handle taking out the bodies. You don't have to."

"No. I do." He said, anger contorting his face.

Kate wondered if the anger was directed at Glenn. If he was still angry that he went after him that first afternoon or if he was just angry at the walkers, the world, Lori, Shane - himself.

He suddenly approached Daryl.

"Everyone have a gun and a knife?"

Daryl nodded. "Ya, running low on ammo."

Glenn who had never sat back down interrupted.

"Maggie and me, we were planning on making a run this afternoon. Found a phone book, some places we can hit, look for bullets and formula."

"Cleared out the generator room." Daryl continued, "Axel's there trying to fix it in case of emergency. We are gonna sweep the lower level as well."

"Good. Good." Rick replied as he walked across the room and out the gate.

"RICK!" Hershel called after him, but Rick just kept walking.

Kate looked at Carl who was staring at his oatmeal like he wished he could disappear in it. She looked around the room at the rest of her family and saw the same concern she was feeling on their faces.

Not long after Rick retreated back into the depths of the prison, Daryl stood and as he had so often done lately, he got them organized for the day. He surprised them all when he asked Carl to help him sweep the lower levels with him and Oscar. It was good to see a smile sneak back on Carl's face, if only for a moment. Daryl asked Glenn if he and Maggie were set to go, if Kate and Beth could handle the gates as they left. Everyone nodded and headed out.

Hershel hugged Maggie and Glenn goodbye and reminded them unnecessarily to be careful - like a Dad watching his kids heading out for a night out instead of sending them into a world of hungry dead. He was going to stay back in the cell with the baby, so the four of them headed out to the yard.

Glenn decided to take the Suburban and loaded it up with a few supplies in case they couldn't make it back in one night. Beth and Kate hugged them goodbye, opened the gates and waved as they headed down the lane, walkers lamely following.

Kate turned to Beth and sighed. Beth smiled her sweetly before her face crumpled and tears formed in her eyes.

"I hate when she goes." She said in a small voice.

"I know. Me too." She put her arm around Beth's shoulders and they made their way back to the cells.

Later that afternoon, Carl and Oscar had returned from the lower levels. Kate had asked where Daryl was and Carl just said he was staying down there for a while. Great, she thought bitterly, just what we need, two of them avoiding everyone else by running after walkers.

She knew it wasn't fair. The walkers needed to be dealt with. She was just worried.

Oscar headed off to his cell, a pair of slippers in his hand, to take a nap. She gave the slippers a funny look and he just shrugged and smiled.

"It's the simple things." He called over his shoulder.

She was starting to like that guy.

Carl seemed a little more himself after his adventures. He filled them in on the walker they killed and finding Carol's knife. Kate's heart ached imagining how scary it must have been for Carol and a fresh wave of grief crashed over her.

She sat next to Hershel at a table in the common room. Beth was busy working on something in a large stockpot. Kate hoped it was dinner because she knew one of them would end up responsible for the next meal and she was out of new ways to make spam and canned beans interesting. She was listening to Hershel tell her a story about when Maggie was a baby, and as he looked down at the little bundle in his arms she could tell he was nervous about his daughter being on the run. Their recent losses making all their anxieties come to the surface.

Kate's eyes caught movement at the gate and Rick walked into the common area slowly. She wondered for a second what this visit would bring. Which Rick would this be. She was almost nervous that Daryl wasn't there, but she reminded herself that she knew Rick. Besides, he almost looked sheepish as he walked slowly into the room.

Everyone froze in place, eying him warily. Without a word he approached Hershel. He looked almost afraid, like he was trying to decide if he really wanted to do what he came in to do. He finally reached out and gingerly took the sleeping girl from Hershel's arms. Kate watched him closely as he held his daughter for the first time. So many emotions colored his face until it finally decided on one and broke into a smile. He held his daughter to his chest and for a minute it really felt like everything would be ok.

A few moments later, they followed Rick into the sunshine of the yard. Carl was smiling wide and Rick was looking more like his old self. Kate was watching him again when she saw his face change and knew he had spotted something. He handed the baby to Carl and slowly walked past the guard tower and down the sloping gravel path leading to the dog run.

At first, Kate thought he might have heard a vehicle approaching and she hoped that Glenn and Maggie had found success already and were returning earlier than expected. They all started to follow Rick's path, slowly, being mindful of Hershel on his crutches. She watched as Rick approached the dog run, his gun in his hand. A row of walkers were lined up, as usual, clawing and gnawing. Except one of them wasn't a walker, unless walkers could carry baskets now.

"There's a woman out there!" Beth gasped.

Carl quickly handed Judith to her and took off in a sprint to the gate, the prison key ring already in his hand. Rick stood at the fence, chain links the only thing separating him from her - until suddenly the walkers realized they had a living meal and she moved away.

"Does she have a sword?!" Kate asked. She was impressed and terrified all at once.

The stranger quickly fought off the walkers, but she fell to the ground.

"I think she's injured." Hershel said.

They had almost reached the fence, watching in horror as the walkers started to close in on her. Panic started to well up in Kate's throat. She couldn't take another death right now, not even a stranger's. She opened her mouth to scream, but the blast of Carl's gun beat her to it.

A second blast quickly followed and then Rick opened the gate and he and Carl ran out, firing on a few more walkers. Rick reached her as Carl headed for the basket she dropped.

"Is she bit?" Hershel questioned as Rick looked over the semi-conscious woman at his feet.

"Gun shot!" Rick replied, and threw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, her long dreads hanging down.

Kate had run ahead to get the door to the cells open and as she watched them make their way towards her she thought for a second about what a sorry sight they made. A man struggling to carry a shot, bloody woman, an old one-legged man hobbling on crutches as his young daughter, juggling a newborn in her arms, agonizes over his every step and a boy lugging a basket. The basket. She didn't pay much attention to it before. It was red, the kind you use at a store if you're only getting a few things. As Carl passed through the door she looked at the contents and all she saw was baby formula. Fear flooded through her. Why formula? How did she know there was a baby here? Where were Maggie and Glenn?

She slid the gate shut and quickly followed them into the common room. Rick was already shouting out instructions.

"Carl! Get a blanket. Beth, water and a towel." He laid the woman gently on the ground. "She's not coming in the cell block!" he ordered and then to her, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, steady now."

Kate watched as Rick took the water Beth brought him and dribbled some over the stranger's chest.

"It's alright. It's alright. Look at me. Look at me. Who are you?"

Kate knew he was trying to be soothing, but she didn't blame the woman one bit when she lunged for her sword. Rick kicked it away expertly, a leftover from his sheriff days she guessed.

"We're not going to hurt you unless you try something stupid first, alright?"

"Rick." They looked up to see Daryl walking slowly from the cell block.

Kate was relieved to see him, the situation felt dangerous and Rick had just started acting normal again.

"Who the hell is this?" Daryl snarled.

Then again, Daryl wasn't friendly with strangers.

Rick leaned down to look at her again.

"You wanna tell us your name?" Rick asked.

The woman just looked at him like a cornered animal: scared and ready to fight for her life. He repeated his question.

"You wanna tell us your name?" Again was met with silence.

"Y'all come on in here." Daryl coaxed them all to follow him back to the block.

"Everything alright?" Rick questioned.

Kate guessed he was probably wondering, as she was, what could be so important as to take them away from this situation. They didn't get visitors often.

"You're gonna wanna see this."

"Go ahead." Rick said, giving them all permission to follow Daryl, "Carl, get the basket."

He turned back to the bleeding woman on the floor.

"We'll keep this safe and sound" Rick motioned to her sword in his hand. "Doors are all locked, you'll be safe here. We can treat that."

He looked at her bloody leg.

"I didn't ask for your help." She finally spoke, strong and stern.

"Doesn't matter, can't let you leave."

He turned and they all walked into C Block. Curiously following Daryl. He stopped at one of the lower level cells. Rick looked in. Kate couldn't see what he was looking at, but he froze there in shock and Daryl was wearing a rare grin.

Over the last year, they had all watched plenty of folks rise from the dead, but this was a new one. In the cell, looking dirty and exhausted (which was saying something in this group) was Carol. A woman they had symbolically buried two days ago.

"How?" She heard Hershel ask, astounded.

"Poor thing. Fought her way into a cell. Passed out. Dehydrated." Daryl explained.

They all were embracing her, holding her, thanking God (those of them that still believed there was one) and wiping grateful, happy tears from their eyes. Kate looked at Daryl and he grinned at her. They stood there in that happy moment and held that gaze a second longer than necessary. It was all she needed, it buoyed her hopes and erased all the confusion she had been feeling about his behavior towards her.

Rick, Daryl, Hershel and Carl headed back out to deal with the situation in the common room, but not before Kate pulled Rick aside.

"The basket, it's all baby formula." She explained anxiously.

"I know. I saw." He said, acknowledging with his eyes they were worrying about the same thing.

"We'll get to the bottom of this."

Carol was holding the little girl while Beth and Kate tried to fill her in on everything: the rogue prisoner being responsible for the walkers getting in, how Oscar had killed him and earned a spot for him and Axel within the group, how Lori died and how poor Carl had to shoot her so she wouldn't turn, Rick's recent return to their company from the bowels of the prison and how Glenn and Maggie were on a run. That made Kate eye the basket of formula nervously, before glancing towards the common area. She hoped they were getting some answers.

An hour later they all stood in the cemented yard of the prison while Rick, Daryl, Oscar and Carl loaded up the Hyundai with ammunition and supplies. They had gotten answers from the woman, whose name was Michonne. A man from a town called Woodbury had shot her. She was running from him when she came upon the store Maggie and Glenn were searching. She was hidden, but saw this man take them by force, she assumed back to this town. The town had tight security and plenty of ammo, but she thought they could get in. So it was decided, all of them were willing, but only Rick, Daryl, Oscar and Michonne would go to rescue them.

Kate was scared to death to see them go. She wanted Maggie and Glenn back and this seemed like the only way, but how dangerous would it be? Only four of them going in against a whole town? It sounded like a suicide mission. She wondered if she'd ever see any of them again and the thought panicked her.

She looked across the yard, watching the man she knew she loved prepare to once again, willingly, throw himself into a dangerous situation to protect them. They were leaving too fast. She wanted to talk to him - explain to him that even if he didn't feel the same way, that she loved him. That she saw him. Saw that he was good, loyal, kind, fiercely protective, smart, all the things she knew he doubted. But there was no time for that now. Oscar and Michonne had already gotten into the small SUV and Rick was saying his goodbyes to his son. Daryl had just walked out, both hands holding bags of supplies. He was at the car, just out of sight of most of the group.

"Daryl." She called.

"Ya?" He turned towards her. She stepped towards him, boldly closing the distance between them until there was only half a step left and she had to look up to make eye contact. Daryl's whole body stiffened. She knew he wasn't used to anyone being in his personal space. She noticed the way he sometimes flinched when people touched him, but if he was uncomfortable with her nearness, he didn't step back.

"I need you to promise me something." She had desperation in her eyes, she knew it and didn't care. Adrenaline coursed through her, causing her to breathe heavily. "I need you to promise me you'll be back.

"Maggie and Glenn are strong..." He started, completely seeming to miss her meaning.

She cut him off and put her hands on his chest.

"No Daryl. You. I need you to promise that YOU'LL come back."

He stared at her hard. It wasn't anger, but it was still a scowl. His eyes looked for the meaning in her's and didn't believe it when he found it.

He nodded once but didn't say a word. Impulsively, maybe heedlessly, she rose up on her toes and kissed the corner of his mouth softly. Almost imperceptibly, he moved his mouth towards her's. She lowered her head and stood flat on her feet again. She was afraid to make eye contact, afraid to see rejection lurking in his. She mumbled something about being careful and walked towards the cell block. Her sudden courage dissolving with every step.

Rick passed her and nodded, something in his eyes made her wonder what he saw. She heard him ask Daryl if he was ready and Daryl's quick affirmation. She didn't follow them to the gate like she normally would've, but hung back with Carol and the baby before disappearing into her cell.


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

– Kate -

It wasn't until the next day, sometime in the late morning, that they heard the sound of tires crunching up the gravel lane.

"Please be them." Carl said under his breath.

Carol and Carl were down at the fence with Kate. It felt like they had been gone forever. In the relatively short amount of time since they'd left to rescue Maggie and Glenn, a group of four found their way through a back, unsecured part of the prison.

The people, Tyreese, his sister Sasha, a man named Allen and his teenage son, Ben, seemed nice enough, but the new people made her nervous without Rick or Daryl around. Now that they knew there was a way in, she felt vulnerable. She was anxious for Rick to handle the newcomers, see Maggie and Glenn safe at home and to have Daryl back.

Sure enough, the Hyundai came into view and the three of them hurried to open the gates. Rick opened the door.

"Drive it up, I'll meet you up there". He said to Maggie who she was relieved to see in the driver's seat. She couldn't make out who else was in the car and she was desperate to know if Daryl and Glenn were ok.

"Is everyone back?" Kate demanded.

Rick looked at her carefully and the expression on his face made her feel like she'd swallowed a boulder.

"We lost Oscar at Woodbury..."

"Where's Daryl?" Carol asked, panicked as she peered through the back window.

Kate made some kind of sound she didn't recognize as her own and she felt like her knees were going to collapse under her. Carol didn't look much better. Rick, realizing they were all suspecting the worst, quickly spoke up.

"It's alright. He's alive."

She felt like she could breathe again, but her mind started to race. Was he following behind in another vehicle, was he hunting, did he get captured?

"Where is he then?" She heard herself demand.

"We ran into his brother. Merle. They went off." Rick explained gently.

"His brother? How?" Rick wasn't filling her in fast enough. "Went off? Where? Hunting?"

He just shook his head.

"They left?" Carol asked incredulously. "Daryl left? He's gone? Is he coming back?"

The two women stood there in front of Rick trying to understand. It was clear Rick was struggling with the answer as much as they were.

"Why!? Why wouldn't they come back?" Kate needed to understand.

This didn't make sense. She remembered that night in the tower, Daryl's fear that the group wouldn't accept Merle.

"Did you try to stop them? Did something happen?"

She was trying her best to keep from sobbing, but there were tears in her eyes and her voice shook. Carol had started to whimper at her side. Somewhere in the back of her mind Kate was wondering about Carol's reaction, but she couldn't think about that now.

"It was Merle that took Maggie and Glenn." Rick said gravely.

Kate covered her face with her hands. Rick continued, "He worked for the leader of the group, the Governor is what they call him. Merle tortured Glenn and when we got there they were about to be executed."

It was too much. The thought of her friends being in that situation, how close they had come to losing Maggie and Glenn, that Merle was responsible for it all. That Daryl had been forced to choose. She needed to think, needed to not be here right now. She nodded tearfully at Rick and walked past the fence and up the drive.

She knew she couldn't go back to her cell. She knew Hershel and Beth would be joyfully welcoming Maggie and Glenn home and she didn't want to bring them down. So instead she walked into the field, towards the fence. She reached the end, to a spot there weren't any walkers and sank into the long grass.

She understood of course. On some level anyway. She had brothers that she loved, she would never be able to walk away from them. But she also knew she wouldn't have to. Her brothers would never do the things Merle had done. Part of her felt foolish. She stood there and forced him to promise something he couldn't. There were no guarantees in this world, especially going into something dangerous and unknown like he had been. But she had wanted him to know that she cared for him. That it wasn't just Daryl Dixon out there in the world alone. She wanted him to know he had something to come back to, something that was just his if he wanted. But not only did he not come back, he chose not to. He knew he was breaking his promise to her, and although she understood his devotion to his brother, it hurt.

She cried about Daryl being gone, what it meant for her selfishly. Her heart broken, her pride wounded. She cried because losing another member of their family was a loss for everyone, emotionally and because Daryl provided so much to the group. She cried because she knew Daryl didn't have a choice and she hated that he had been put in that losing situation. Once the tears were flowing it was like she was crying for everything they had been through: the deaths, the lack of security over the months, no food, the constant fear that the worst was still to come. She cried for her mother and brothers. Mourning people she didn't even know were dead or alive. She cried for all the times she didn't let herself.

And when she had no tears left, her face swollen and her body feeling like an empty shell, she just sat there staring at the woods, willing him to come walking out of them. Ignoring the walkers that hungrily swarmed at the fence in front of her.

The next few days at the prison were dark and desperate. Rick was spiraling again, except this time, instead of chasing walkers in the bowels of the prison, he was chasing ghosts. Tyreese's group was forced to flee when Rick became frighteningly unhinged. One minute he was fine and the next he was shaking, screaming up at the walls and waving his gun.

Maggie and Glenn were both still traumatized by their experience at Woodbury. Glenn seemed to be trying to take back control by acting out. He saw Rick's current descent into madness and Daryl's absence as his call to step-up. In the shadow of the Governor's threat, he wanted to be aggressive, defensive and take action. Hershel, who seemed to be holding them altogether, tried to reason with him, counter his rash strategies with practical thinking.

Maggie, in the meantime, spent most her time in her cell, turned towards the wall. Whatever she went through had turned her lifeless and unreachable.

Axel, normally chattery and cheerful, was mourning the death of Oscar. While Michonne, suffering from a concussion, practically slept for two days straight, locked behind a cell door where Rick insisted she stay. He planned to make her leave as soon as she was able, although what she had done to earn his mistrust wasn't exactly clear to the rest of them.

Much discussion was had about whether they should stay or run. Hershel thought leaving was the safest bet, but Glenn argued that it would be impossible with a crying newborn and a one-legged man on crutches. Kate was afraid to stay, but secretly dreaded leaving. She knew if they did, any chance of Daryl returning to them would be gone.


	12. Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

"The way back home's through the wild and the winds. The way back home's in your arms. All my life I've been searching for someone and I could never get it right. I've never seen so much light. - Ryan Adams

\- Daryl -

Daryl regretted his decision as soon as he turned his back on Rick and saw his brother's ugly grin. Merle looked triumphant and it made Daryl's stomach turn. He didn't want to walk away from them, the closest thing to a real family he'd ever had. But it was his brother, what could he do? Even if he wanted to turn his back on his own blood, leave him in this world you couldn't survive in alone, he didn't think he could. He'd been following Merle without question his entire life. It was practically all he knew. Merle was all Daryl ever had. Except that wasn't true anymore. He had a home now and people who cared for him, didn't he? People who fought with him and for him. People he'd die for. And there was Kate. She surprised him, approaching him wild eyed and breathless. Making him promise her things he shouldn't. A promise he was breaking now. She would understand though. They'd talked about Merle. She knew how he felt and once they filled her in on what his brother had done, she would know the Dixons were no good and she would be relieved.

The thought of her finding out about Merle torturing Glenn filled Daryl with shame. Over the years he had gotten used to living with the consequences of Merle's actions. People treated him as if he were the same and he accepted it. But being away from Merle he had stopped being judged on his brother's choices and suddenly being lumped in with him again felt all wrong.

On the way to Woodbury, with her kiss so fresh he could still feel it on the corner of his mouth, he let himself hope. Hope that her unexpected emotion and affection for him was proof that she had feelings for him too. That maybe he actually was the kind of man she could be with. At least in this messed up world. He'd told himself for so long it was impossible, but maybe it wasn't. For a second he had let himself imagine their return, pulling through the gates and seeing relief light up her face. He let himself pretend that he would be the sort of man who would walk right up to her, take her in his arms and kiss her properly.

Now any chance of that, however small, disappeared and in place of it was the promise of a life of following Merle around. They had no shelter, no food, no plan.

Daryl and Merle had been wandering the woods for hours and all they had to show for it was a skinny squirrel. Merle hadn't shut up since they split from Rick and the others. Daryl had forgotten how much he talked. Half the time, Daryl tuned him out. Merle would rattle on for half an hour about some conversation he'd had years ago, coked out of his mind with some drunk guy on the street or some army story Daryl had heard a hundred times where Merle was somehow always the star. Merle cracked Merle up.

Daryl had stopped listening hours ago, instead his mind was back at the prison. He was sure he had made a mistake leaving with his brother, but he didn't know how to fix it. Maybe they'd just show up at the prison and they wouldn't turn them away. Maybe everyone just needed to cool off. Merle stopped in a small clearing between a ring of trees.

"Maybe we can set some snares here. Catch us some supper." He suggested.

Daryl just shrugged.

"What's the matter baby brother? You haven't said two words in the last hour. Old Merle borin' you?"

"Nothin' to say." Daryl mumbled.

Merle started working on the snares, running his mouth the whole time. It was no wonder they hadn't caught anything.

"So Andrea was sayin' your group lost a lot people. Said her sister died."

"Ya. While we were still at camp." Daryl still couldn't believe Andrea was alive and willingly living at Woodbury, but then again he didn't think he'd ever see his brother again and here he was.

"Such a shame. I remember that one was a good lookin' girl. Who else is still around? I was surprised that Chinese kid was still alive."

"Not many people left that you would know. Carol, Glenn, Carl...Kate." Daryl said cautiously, unsure where his brother would go with it.

"Kate? Was that the other blonde girl at camp?"

Daryl nodded.

"Goldilocks!? Goldilocks is still around?!" Merle let out a low whistle. "MmmmMmmm. I wouldn't mind reacquainting myself with that one. See if she missed Uncle Merle."

Daryl's jaw tightened and he gripped his bow.

"Shut the fuck up Merle."

"Ohhhhhhh, does Darylina have a girlfriend? Must be the end of the world, a girl like that let a no-good redneck like you into her bed?"

"I said SHUT THE FUCK UP MERLE!" Daryl bellowed, spit spraying out of his mouth and his face turning red.

"Ok. Ok." Merle held his arms up in mock surrender. Asshole grin on his face. Clearly he was thrilled he'd managed to get under his brother's skin. "Don't get your panties in a bundle."

A few hours later they circled back to the same spot to check the snares. They'd barely spoken since Merle had mentioned Kate. Merle was taking a piss while Daryl stood nearby, aiming his bow at random branches, hoping something edible would venture out.

"There ain't nothin' out here 'cept 'squitos and ants." He complained.

"Patience little brother." Merle said knowingly. "Sooner or later, squirrel is bound to scurry across your path."

"Even so, that ain't much food."

"Eh, more than nothin'."

"Have better luck goin' through one of them houses we passed back on the turn off." Daryl suggested.

"Is that what your, uh, new friends taught you, huh?" Merle started in, turning towards Daryl and sounding so much like their old man. "How to loot for booty?"

"Man, we've been out here for hours. Why don't we find a stream, try our luck with some fish?" Daryl suggested, trying to keep the conversation away from the group.

He fiddled around with the scope on his bow while Merle moved to check a snare.

"I think you're just trying to lead me back to the road, man. Get me over to that prison."

"They've got shelter. Food. Pot to piss in. Might not be a bad idea."

Merle looked up at him from where he was kneeling on the ground. "For you maybe. Ain't gonna be no damn party for me."

He stood to wind the snare string up.

"Everyone will get used to each other." Daryl was trying to convince himself as much as Merle.

"They're all dead. Makes no difference."

Daryl couldn't tell if Merle really believed this or if he was just trying to convince him they shouldn't head that way. Either way, hearing him say that made it feel like ice water had just filled his veins.

"How can you be so sure?" He asked, his tone flat in an attempt to hide the self hatred and dread he was experiencing inside.

"Right about now he's probably hosting a housewarming party where he's gonna bury what's left of your pals. Let's hook some fish. Come on."

Merle stalked off. Daryl followed lamely, trying to think of a way to get himself out of this mess he'd created and back to the prison where he was needed.

As it turned out, Daryl didn't have to come up with a plan. As they had drawn nearer to Yellow Jacket Creek, they heard the cry of a baby. Daryl went running towards the sound, much to Merle's displeasure, and found a family fighting a group of walkers on a bridge. They were cornered and would easily be overtaken, but Daryl was able to get it under control. When the last walker was killed, Merle, who couldn't bother to help, started to dig through the family's car, planning to take whatever he wanted as payment for Daryl's good deeds. In that moment, with his brother pawing through the car of desperate people, where an hysterical mother sat trying to calm her wailing baby, he saw the face of the man whose family he just saved. He saw the fear and disgust he held for Merle and Daryl and he couldn't do it anymore. In that moment he really saw his brother and how truly selfish he was. He forced Merle, with his crossbow pointed at his head, to get out of the car and the family drove away.

Daryl stormed off, not caring if Merle followed.

"What shit you doing pointin' that thing at me?" Merle said angrily, catching up with Daryl in the woods.

"They were scared man." For the first time in his life, Daryl didn't care if Merle was mad at him.

"They were rude is what they were. Rude and they owed us a token of gratitude." Merle fumed.

"Ah, they didn't owe us nothin'." Daryl continued to walk quickly through the undergrowth, Merle running after.

"Ya, you helpin' people out, out of the goodness of your heart, even though you might die doing it. Is that something your Sheriff Rick taught you?"

Merle stopped and Daryl turned, his anger overflowing.

"There was a BABY!" He shouted. How could his brother be so uncaring?

"Oh otherwise you would've just left them to the biters then." Merle prodded.

Daryl paused.

"Man, I went back for ya. You weren't there. I didn't cut off your hand neither. You did that, way before they locked you onto that roof and you asked for it."

Daryl was shouting, waving his arrows around, standing up to a brother he never could stand up to before. Merle laughed, it was a defensive and angry laugh. Memories of their father flooded Daryl's mind, his father would do the same thing as he was working himself up into a fury.

"You know what's funny to me?" Merle started. "You and Sheriff Rick are like this now, right?". He crossed his two fingers. Daryl eyed him warily, anger still oozing out of every pore. "I'll bet you a penny and a fiddle of gold, huh, that you never told 'em that we were plannin' on robbin' that camp blind."

"Didn't happen." Daryl growled, teeth gritted, trying to distance himself from a plan he was ashamed to have been a part of, knowing now how it would've hurt those he cared for.

"Ya, it didn't 'cause I wasn't there to help you." Merle spat.

"What, like when we were kids? Huh? Who left who then?"

"WHAT?" Merle exploded, "Huh? Is that why I lost my hand?"

Daryl got in his brother's face. "You lost your hand cause you're a simple minded piece of shit!" and he turned and started to walk away, disgusted with himself for leaving the group for this. For breaking his promise to her. For what? This sorry excuse of a person who was bent on dragging him down with him.

"Ya, you don't...", Merle screamed and grabbed Daryl's shirt, causing it to rip and Daryl to fall to the ground.

Merle stopped yelling and stood there. The fight suddenly gone from him while Daryl tried to pull his shirt back on. He knew what had made his brother stop, he knew he could see the scars their father had given him. They criss crossed his back, a permanent reminder that he was worthless. Another way his past was always with him, no matter how he tried to escape it. He kept them well hidden, enough so that Merle hadn't even seen them before.

"I, I didn't know he was...," Merle sounded sorrowful and apologetic, but it was too late.

"Ya. He did. He did the same to you." Daryl said, holding back the emotion and failing. "That's why you left first."

He was gathering the arrows that had scattered when he fell.

"I had to man. I would've killed him otherwise." Merle stammered his reasons. Daryl had stood, marching into the woods.

"Where you goin'?" Merle called after him desperately.

"Back where I belong." Daryl cried.

"I can't go with you. I, I tried to kill that black bitch, damn near killed the Chinese kid."

"He's KOREAN."

Merle's face contorted in frustration, "Whatever! Doesn't matter man, I just can't go with you."

"You know, I may be the one walking away, but you're the one that's leaving. Again."

Daryl walked off. It was true. Merle had done this to himself. He couldn't just do the awful things he did and expect Daryl to continue to pay the price. He shouldn't have to throw away what he had worked for because Merle wanted to beat people, steal from people, kill people. They weren't the same, they never were. Merle was his brother and he would always love him and care about him, but Daryl had always longed for more. A place to belong, a sense of family, a chance to be worth something to someone.

He had that now. For the first time ever, here in this fucked up world he had found a family and a place to call home. And maybe, maybe if he was really lucky, he'd have someone to share it with. His life had been filled with so much darkness, there was always that emptiness inside him that he was looking to fill. He realized now that when he was with her, he didn't feel so empty and now, far from her, not knowing if she was ok, the emptiness was there again.

Here, back in the darkness, he realized what it had been all along, he had never known someone that was so filled with light. She wasn't just good, she had this ability to walk in a room and fill it up. When she talked, her whole face came alive. She just made life better and if he could get back in time, he swore to himself, he would spend the rest of his life loving her. She might not want anything to do with him, but his heart was her's for the taking.

At some point on his journey back to the prison, Daryl became aware that Merle was following him. Once he had cooled down, Daryl was glad for this. It wasn't that he wanted him out of his life, he just wasn't going to spend the rest of it following him around.

He worried how it would go with Glenn, Maggie and Rick when Merle showed up with him, but he knew they'd figure something out. One thing he was sure of, he wasn't going to leave them again.

He had gradually been steering them towards the prison over the last couple days, but still it was taking forever to get there. Daryl tried to push the idea that they were all dead out of his mind. He would never forgive himself if that were the case. They were about a mile out, deep in the woods, when they heard the first shots ring out. Daryl looked at Merle, eyes wide with realization and panic.

"The prison! Come on!" Daryl yelled, running as fast as he could through the kudzu and fallen branches of the Georgian woods.

His side ached and his lungs stung, but he didn't stop. The gunfire continued on, stopping for a couple minutes, before starting up again. The walkers were growing heavier the closer they came, being drawn by the same noise that they were. He and Merle emerged from the woods that surrounded the prison. Daryl saw Rick pinned against the outer fence struggling with two walkers with more approaching. He stopped, aimed and sent a bolt through the walker's skull. Merle came running forward, a length of rebar he'd picked up on the road in his hands. Between the three of them, they handled the immediate threat. Rick and Merle stopped at the fence, surveying a field of walkers. Daryl took off running towards the prison, Merle shouting after him. He ran alongside the dog run, pushing walkers aside, stabbing them when they got too close. He turned and ran through the fallen gates and up the gravel slope to the prison building. He could see the rest of them huddled near each other at the fence.

"Open the gate!" He bellowed. Carl ran to unlock it and Daryl pushed his way through. He saw her then, she took a couple hesitant steps, but their eyes met and he thought she must've understood then because she broke into a run, a sob escaping from her throat and threw herself at him. He held her, ignoring everyone else for the moment, resting his lips on the top of her head as she cried into his chest.


	13. Chapter 13

CHAPTER 13

– Kate -

Even after Daryl's return and their scene in the prison yard, Kate wasn't sure where she and Daryl stood. The rest of the group seemed to assume and accept that Daryl and Kate were together now, and in a way, she guessed that they were. There was an unspoken understanding, something wordless that had passed between them as he had held her sobbing in the courtyard. She knew their intentions, it was just a matter of getting through the steps. Starting a relationship wasn't an easy thing when your group is preparing to fight an enemy who has already shown himself capable of unspeakable actions. She imagined things like first dates, first kisses, declarations of love and affection weren't easy things for Daryl as it was, but it was almost inappropriate to consider doing any of that when they could all be dead by tomorrow. If they could deal with their new threat, she and Daryl could explore the rest of it then. For the time being, it was enough to know they were back under the same roof.

Daryl had returned, black sheep brother in tow, just as the Governor and his men were retreating. They had driven up to the gates, peppering the courtyard with rounds and killing Axel (and almost Carol) in the process. They were lucky it wasn't much worse, the Governor had filled their yard with a truckful of walkers and Hershel was stranded, vulnerable and on crutches far from the safety of the prison building. Rick was caught outside of the gates, leaving the rest of them in the courtyard to fight off the sniper that had managed to make it into a guard tower on their own.

That night, as Kate sat on her bed, removing her boots, Daryl knocked softly on a bar of her cell. He stood there, filling up most of the open space between the cement wall and the bars.

"Hey" He said in a coarse whisper.

"Hey" She said with a big smile, unable to hide just how happy she was that he was home.

"I wanted to say sorry, um, for not comin' back right away. After how we said goodbye, the promise I made you..."

"Daryl." She cut him off. "Thank you for apologizing, but seriously, you don't have to. He's your brother, I completely understood that you were in a no win situation."

He looked at the ground. "I feel like an asshole."

"Don't. I mean, I was upset, I'm not going to lie, but not because I was mad at you. I was upset because the situation sucked and I was afraid I'd...we'd lost you. I'm just happy you are home, we all are. That's all that matters."

Kate wanted to get up and go to him. Wrap her arms around him and feel him hold her. Confirm to herself he was there, but she wanted Daryl to set the pace. She had already made the first 'move' with her impulsive plea when he left for Woodbury. So instead she just sat their lamely on the edge of her bunk with her hands holding onto the mattress.

"I'm not goin' anywhere." He promised, looking at her intensely.

"Good" She squeaked, digging her fingers even tighter into the bed to convince herself to stay put. There was an awkward moment where neither of them said anything. She was silently willing him to walk in her cell and stay, but instead he mumbled,"G'night Kate."

"Good night Daryl."

He turned and took the four paces to his mattress on the perch at the top of the stairs.

The next day tensions were high at the prison. Their field was filled with the walkers the Governor had released and with the fences down, they had been joined by several dozen since. Rick decided it wasn't worth the ammo to kill them now to fix the fence. They needed all they could get for when the Governor returned. Rick also insisted they all remain inside as much as possible to avoid having anyone else fall to the same fate as Axel. With the exception of whoever was placed on guard, they all were in "C Block" together. That normally would be fine, they'd spent plenty of time in tighter quarters, but the anticipation of the next attack and the fact that Merle was now sharing their space only days after bringing this all upon them was making it particularly difficult.

Kate felt torn. She sympathized with Glenn and Maggie. They had every right to want him gone. Truth was, after what he had done she wasn't thrilled he was there either. But if it was the price they paid for having Daryl back, she wasn't going to complain. She knew Daryl would keep him in line. He couldn't control his mouth, but at least he wouldn't let Merle hurt anyone. Merle did seem to be on the best behavior Merle could manage and they were making him sleep in one of the caged cells in the common room to give everyone a little space and peace of mind.

She felt bad for Daryl who had to defend his brother's presence more than once to Glenn, who couldn't seem to keep himself from reminding everyone how he felt about it. His patience pushed to the edge when Glenn referred to Merle as 'a snake in the nest'.

"Man, are we gonna go through this again!?" Daryl had snapped.

He was growing impatient with it all. Kate knew he must hate having to defend someone he knew was wrong. She wished Glenn would give it a rest, even if she understood why he couldn't let it go.

That afternoon, Carl came running in. He had been on watch with Maggie when they spotted Andrea approaching the prison. The group headed to the yard, but instead of welcoming her warmly she was ordered to the ground and searched.

Andrea had been one of them, but their paths had diverged and now she was in the enemy's camp. They were all relieved and happy when it was discovered that Michonne had been with Andrea all winter. Kate had hoped she had somehow found safety, but knew it was unlikely that she made it off the farm alive. But now, they didn't know if they could trust her.

Andrea seemed offended and in disbelief that they weren't overjoyed at her appearance at their gate, but Andrea had always demanded people treat her with more grace than she ever afforded anyone else.

Rick led her into the common room and Andrea looked around the small, gray space.

"Hershel, my God." She said, looking sorrowfully at his missing leg. "I can't believe this. Where's Shane?"

Rick shook his head and looked away.

"And Lori?"

Hershel spoke up, "She had a girl. Lori didn't survive."

"Neither did T-Dog." Carol added.

"I'm so sorry. Carl."

The boy eyed her coldly.

"Rick, I-" She tried again to offer sympathy, but Rick turned away from her. "You all live here?"

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They didn't miss the pity in her voice. The prison was their home. They all felt a sense of pride that they had established this refuge together. It didn't sit well with any of them that she seemed to be sorry for them. They didn't need her sympathy.

Andrea had come with the intention of talking some sense into Rick or to somehow elect herself the mediator between the two sides. The way she spoke of the Governor, Phillip, as she called him, made it clear she didn't know the side of the man they had seen. She even thought the resolution could include them all living at Woodbury together, peacefully. As if Maggie and Glenn could just set up house where they had been tortured. As if Daryl and Merle could put their experience with the Governor aside. No, it was clear Andrea didn't know the Governor. She also didn't know them anymore. She seemed taken aback that her attempts at convincing them a reasonable solution was possible were met with threats and promises of war.

Later that afternoon, they watched their old friend drive off in one of the cars left at the prison. It probably belonged to one of the guards that had died at the fall. There were plenty to spare and despite her short sightedness, they still cared about her. They would welcome her back when she eventually realized 'Phillip' wasn't the man she thought he was.

That night they all gathered together in the cellblock. Merle had told them the Governor would attack again, but hearing Andrea say he was preparing for war was sobering. Rick had decided they weren't leaving and so it was a lot like sitting around waiting for the sky to fall. They sat, or stood, wordlessly, feeling helpless.

The next morning, Rick, Michonne and Carl set off to replenish their weapons supply. It was Kate's turn to take watch up on the catwalk, behind the wooden pallets that lined the chain linked fence, providing the barest of covers. Binoculars in hand, she surveyed the prison fences and the edges of the woods. Aside from the walkers that still wandered aimlessly through their yard, she found no sign of life. The door opened and Daryl stepped out, his crossbow across his back - a nearly permanent part of him. Her face broke out in a grin.

"Want some company?" He asked.

"I do."

He picked up a crate and set it down next to the one she was sitting on. She was peering through the pallets, allowing his shoulder to touch hers. She handed him the binoculars and watched him scan the fence.

"Kind of interesting that Rick took Michonne. Do you think he's starting to trust her?" Kate was curious if Daryl had any insight to Rick's thoughts.

"Guess we'll see."

"Ya. I hope so. I like her."

"Not much to like. She barely talks."

"Neither do you and I like you a lot!" She teased, nudging him playfully with her shoulder until he gave her a smile. He looked at her intensely and swallowed hard.

"Lucky for me you're a terrible judge of character." He said without a hint of humor.

"You know that isn't true Daryl."

They both turned back to the field in front of them, but she allowed herself to rest her head against his arm and she felt him tense ever so slightly.

They sat together like that for a few minutes, talking about how they could clear the yard, when they thought the Governor would attack, how Merle was doing amongst them all. They both heard the sound of the engine at the same time and stood up quickly to get a better look at the gravel drive.

"It's too early to be Rick." Daryl thought aloud.

The car slowly came into sight and they recognized it as the car they allowed Andrea to take yesterday. Kate looked through the binoculars.

"I don't recognize the driver. Some guy. Andrea is in the passenger seat."

"Stay put!" Daryl instructed her urgently as he took off through the door to C Block. Less than a minute later, Daryl, Merle and Glenn exited the door to the courtyard and Maggie and Carol joined her on the catwalk, armed.

The car rolled to a stop at the only remaining gate between the yard and them. Andrea and the man emerged, no guns or weapons pulled. Their group continued to aim at them.

"What do you want?" Daryl bellowed.

"To talk." Andrea replied, annoyed.

"Didn't we do that yesterday?" He returned. Walkers started to approach the car slowly. "Better make it quick. You ain't comin' inside."

"Come on Daryl. Its me." Andrea said, looking over her shoulder. Daryl didn't reply. She sighed. "Where's Rick?"

"Anything you have to say to Rick, you can say to me." He said. "Might want to take care of your friend there."

Andrea turned, pulling her knife and sending it through the rotting skull of the approaching walker.

"Look, Phillip agreed to sit down and talk to Rick." She turned again to stab another walker while her companion took care of a couple on the other side of the vehicle. She faced them again, breathless and annoyed. "Tomorrow, 10AM."

"Where? We ain't going to Woodbury."

"Feed mill, about 5 miles north of here."

"I'll give Rick the message. Now leave."

Andrea gave another exasperated sigh before she and the man got back in the car and reversed back down the road. They all watched them go before heading back inside.


	14. Chapter 14

CHAPTER 14

– Kate -

Rick, Michonne and Carl returned as the sun was retreating behind the tree line. They had had a successful trip - a stockpile of weapons and ammunition, a small, portable crib for Judith, some food and various supplies. It was also apparent that both Rick and Carl were warming to Michonne and she seemed different too. She and Carl especially seemed to have bonded on the run and Kate fully expected Michonne to be part of their group moving forward. As soon as they returned, Daryl filled Rick in on their visit from Andrea. Rick didn't love the idea of meeting with the Governor on his terms, but it might actually be worth it just to meet the man face-to-face.

It was decided that Rick would take Daryl and Hershel with him and go a little early to scope out the location so there wouldn't be any surprises. Kate didn't like the idea of Daryl going, but she knew it made the most sense. The next morning, after an early breakfast, Rick pulled the green Hyundai to the courtyard. Daryl, choosing to take the motorcycle, parked next to it. Merle and Kate were at the door, watching them pack up the car and fill the tanks from gas they siphoned from other cars at the prison.

Daryl stalked towards them, his walk always made her feel like prey in the best way, and stopped at the gate, tangling his fingers in the wire. He looked at his brother.

"Merle, don't do anythin' stupid while I'm gone or I'll kick your ass out myself."

Merle turned his head and spit. "Sure thing baby brother." He said with a grin. Daryl eyed him for a couple seconds before turning to Kate.

"Can I talk to you?" He asked, motioning her away from Merle with a nod of his head.

Kate was surprised by the request, but immediately headed down the steps to follow him.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh." Merle teased, "Where you taking Goldilocks, Darylina?"

"Shut up Merle!" Daryl shouted over his shoulder. Rick looked up from his task at the back of the car, but didn't say anything.

Daryl led Kate around the side of the building to the only area inside the gates that couldn't be viewed by those in the courtyard or on watch. It was a small alcove between the cell block, gray concrete walls rising around it and grass working its way through the cracks in the ground. He stopped and turned to face her.

"Just ignore him." He said, looking quickly from her to the ground and wiping his hands on the sides of his pants nervously.

"I do." She said with a smile. Her heart had started to race.

He reached for her hand and came up with her wrist instead, pulling her towards the wall and taking a step closer to her. She backed up a little until she was leaning against the cinder blocks. They were cool through her thin t-shirt, but she didn't mind. Daryl had never been this close to her and she worked up the courage to turn her face up to look at him. He still had his hand around her wrist, but he slid it down until he was clumsily holding her hand in his.

"I didn't want to go without saying goodbye."

He took the last half step, closing the distance between them and leaned his head down to kiss her.

They started unsure and slow. He kissed her once, twice. Her hands moved to his head and his to her waist. She inhaled his smell, an earthy musk, and as she did, he pulled her to him tightly before deepening his kiss. It was a little desperate, a little sloppy - like two people dying of thirst and finally getting a drink. He drew back a little, leaving his forehead pressed up against her's as they both caught their breath. He brought his hands up to her face and pulled her mouth to his again, kissing her softly twice before pulling her into an embrace.

'Stay safe." She breathed into the leather of his vest.

"You too." He said into the top of her head. "If anything goes down, Merle will keep you safe until I find you."

He looked down at her in his arms before kissing her one more time. They walked back towards the courtyard, fingers entwined briefly. He pulled his warm hand from her's just before coming into view of Rick and the others. Hershel was getting into the Hyundai awkwardly, with Maggie's help, pulling his crutches in after him.

"You ready?" Rick asked Daryl.

"Mmhmmm." He looked at Kate again and nodded before heading to his bike and climbing on.

Rick, Hershel and Daryl returned to the prison only a few hours later. Everyone had gone out to open the gate and see for themselves they had all made it back safely. It was obvious to all the meeting hadn't provided any answers. The three men had arrived somberly and Rick had ordered everyone inside. They all stood in the cell block in silence, not a word from any of them, even Merle. Their eyes were on Rick, waiting for him to let them know how it went.

"So, I met this Governor." Rick said. "Sat with him for quite awhile."

"Just the two of you?" Merle interrupted.

"Yeah." Merle turned and under his breath said disapprovingly to Glenn, "Should have gone when we had the chance, bro." and walked towards the back of the group. Glenn stared him down.

Daryl turned to Kate with a questioning look. Kate leaned towards him and he leaned his head towards her's.

"They had a disagreement. I'll fill you in later." She whispered. Rick continued on.

"He wants the prison. He wants us gone. Dead. He wants us dead for what we did to Woodbury." He paused then, letting everyone process his words. "We're going to war."

They all stood there silently. The air thick with fear and disbelief, exchanging looks of dread.

Rick left to stand guard.

Carol broke the silence.

"Why are we staying here? We should go. We'll find something."

"No way" Merle weighed in. "He'll expect that. They'll be watching. See a big group like this leave. Drag us back. We should attack first."

"I hate to say it." Michonne said gripping her katana. "But I agree with Merle"

"They'll expect that too." Hershel said with authority.

Most of them stayed silent. Kate was scared to death. She suddenly felt claustrophobic in their concrete cellblock. She asked herself how this could possibly be happening. They were tough, but they weren't soldiers.

Later that night, she and Daryl sat on the catwalk outside keeping watch. They sat side-by-side, leaning against the chain link fence, shoulders touching and her arm linked through his. She could tell he was getting more comfortable with her touch, but it still took him some getting used to. She wondered how long it had been since he'd been touched with any tenderness.

"Tell me what went on with Merle while I was gone."

"Oh, ya, well Merle kept insisting they should go and kill the Governor while you were meeting."

"Wouldn't have been a bad idea." Daryl looked at his boots. "Might've worked."

"Ya. Maybe. Glenn was afraid one of you would get caught in the middle. Probably didn't help that it was Merle's idea. Anyway, Glenn wouldn't let Merle go. Got in his way. They started fighting, like actually rolling around the ground, fighting."

"Goddamit Merle."

"Maggie and Michonne helped pull Merle off Glenn. I don't think anyone thinks Glenn could win that fight. Beth actually shot a gun into the air."

"What the hell?" Daryl kind of snorted a laugh in spite of the situation.

"I know. I think I might've said that out loud when she did it! We're lucky a bullet didn't ricochet and kill someone."

"Would've served Merle right. I'm gonna talk to him."

"I don't know. If we are all going to live here together, it might be better if they work some of this out themselves. It shouldn't all be on you Daryl."

They sat there in the quiet for a minute before Daryl spoke again. With amusement in his voice he told her a story about going out in the woods with Merle as a kid. Daryl had accidentally shot Merle in the ass. They both laughed as he recounted how Merle did the dance of pain, shouting the whole time how he was going to kill Daryl. It was so nice to hear Daryl with a smile in his voice and pressed up close to him she could feel the vibration of his gravely speech. Up here in the cool evening, as uneventful hours ticked by, she could almost pretend they weren't waiting to be attacked. Kate pressed her face into his shirtsleeve and breathed deep, smelling the earthy smell. When she looked up, he was looking at her and gave her a soft, slow kiss that she felt down her entire spine.


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15

– Kate -

She didn't see Daryl much the next morning. He, Rick and Hershel spent a lot of time out of the earshot of the others, discussing plans. He also went with Glenn and Michonne to see what they could do to secure the prison, slow the Governor's group down.

Kate kept to the cellblock, trying to keep herself busy and occasionally standing watch. Rick wanted everyone inside when possible and the idea that it was too dangerous to step outside added to the anxious feeling around the prison. Daryl, Rick and even Hershel seemed troubled, more than the rest of them and she wondered what they were keeping to themselves.

Kate sat on a cold cement step in the common room and cradled Judith in her arm. She stuck the bottle in her mouth and watched the little girl guzzle the formula hungrily. The door from the yard swung open behind her and Kate turned her head to find Daryl walking in.

"You seen Merle?" He asked.

"No, actually, last time I saw him was when you were in the truck with Glenn and Michonne. He was in here talking to Carol. Maybe she knows."

"Ok. Thanks." He leaned down to pat Judith's head. "You doin' ok?"

She smiled weakly and nodded, "You ok?"

He shook his head, but he seemed distracted and she wasn't so sure.

About an hour later, Kate was still sitting in the common room, Judith sleeping soundly in her arms. Carol had joined her and was chatting with her as she sorted bullets when they were interrupted by Carl.

"We're meeting outside at the picnic bench in five minutes. My Dad needs to talk to us. Have you guys seen Maggie and Glenn?"

They both shook their heads and Carl walked back out to the yard.

"For as few of us as there are here, no one can find anyone today." Kate observed.

"Right?" Carol said, stacking several blue and white boxes of bullets and standing.

Kate stood with Judith and the two women headed out to the yard where Hershel, Beth and Carl were already sitting at the bench, a crate full of Moltov cocktails on the tabletop, a vulgar contrast to Beth's innocent face. Kate and Carol took a seat on the bench and waited with the rest in silence for Rick to appear. Meetings like this rarely brought good news and Kate thought maybe they would finally find out what had been troubling Daryl all morning, she doubted she wanted to know. Rick walked up and stood waiting for Maggie and Glenn, who made their way over. She wondered if Merle was to be included in this meeting, but Rick began as soon as Maggie and Glenn walked up. Kate looked out at the field. Where was Daryl? Michonne? Why was Rick starting without them?

"When I met with the Governor, he offered me a deal. He said...he said he would leave us alone if I gave him Michonne."

At Rick's words Kate felt as if she'd been punched in the gut. Rick would never give in to such a request, he couldn't. What kind of people would that make them? She looked at his face and her mouth went dry, the guilt was so evident in his eyes.

"And I was gonna do that to keep us safe."

He said 'was'. WAS. She felt herself begin to breathe normally again, but she couldn't help but wonder where Michonne was now. Or where Daryl was for that matter.

"I changed my mind. But now Merle took Michonne to fulfill the deal and Daryl went to stop him and I don't know if it's too late."

This time it was fear Kate felt. Fear and anger. Fear for Michonne. Fear for Daryl. Anger towards Merle and even Rick. Her chest rose and fell as she took deep breaths to try and calm herself down.

"I was wrong not to tell you. And I'm sorry. What I said last year, that first night after the farm. It can't be like that. It can't. What we do, what we're willing to do, who we are, it's not my call. It can't be. I couldn't sacrifice one of us for the greater good because we ARE the greater good. We're the reason we're still here, not me. This is life and death. How you live. How you die. It isn't up to me. I'm not your Governor. We choose to go. We choose to stay. We stick together. We vote. We can stay and we can fight or we can go."

When Rick had finished he looked over at Kate apologetically. Carl got up angrily and stormed towards the prison door. Rick looked skyward and sighed before turning to follow his son into the cell block.

Kate still sat on the bench, Judith still asleep in her arms. Maggie walked over and sat next to her, taking her hand in her's.

"Daryl will find them. He will." She said, her voice soothing and full of compassion. Glenn stood next to her shaking his head in agreement.

Kate was sure Daryl would, but would he find them after Michonne was already delivered to the Governor? Michonne didn't deserve that, no one did. And if Merle got Michonne to the Governor it was unlikely he would just let Merle go, after all, he was a deserter, wasn't he? Daryl wouldn't just let his brother go, he'd try to save them both and they'd probably all end up dead.

"Do you guys know how long they've been gone? How long after Daryl followed?"

They all shook their head. Hershel suggested they all go back inside, someone should be on watch and they shouldn't all be out here unarmed. Kate volunteered for watch, she knew she'd be useless anywhere else and she wanted to wait for Daryl. Beth took the sleeping baby from her and Kate made her way through the cell block and up onto the catwalk.

Time inched by. She had scanned the woods continuously, only stopping when someone came out to check on her.

Rick had just come out, rifle in hand to see if she needed a break, when they spotted movement in the trees. Rick raised his scope as she peered through the binoculars. It was Michonne and she was alone. Kate felt like she was going to be sick. She couldn't imagine a scenario where Michonne returned that didn't include Daryl being dead.

She and Rick headed down through the cell block and into the prison yard. She was sure her legs would fail her, but somehow she kept up with him. He was still unlocking the gate for Michonne when Kate started peppering her with questions.

"Where's Daryl? Did you see Daryl?" Her own voice sounded foreign to her as she tried her best to not betray the panic she was feeling.

Michonne eyed her quietly. "He went after his brother. Said to not let anyone go after him."

"Where is Merle?" Rick asked.

"I don't know. He let me go." She turned to Kate. "Told Daryl the same thing and he took off."

Although Michonne's explanation was an improvement on Kate's initial conclusion, it did little to relieve her worry. She knew Daryl would stop at nothing to help his brother. She looked out at the woods and took a deep breath before turning back to them.

"I'm glad you're back Michonne. You belong here. You are one of us." She gave Rick a pointed look before turning and heading back to the walk to wait.

Kate was unaware of just how much time had passed. Maggie had come up to ask if she wanted some food, but Kate wasn't interested. Ever since Michonne had exited the woods without Daryl, her stomach had been churning.

She was going over the various scenarios for the millionth time when she saw him. With his crossbow over his shoulder, he stepped out of the woods and headed up the drive.

She stood up quickly, nearly tripping over the crate and she yelled down to Rick, "Open the gate! It's Daryl!"

She flew through the door into the cell block. "Daryl's back!" She called to everyone as she climbed down the stairs to the common room, running to the sliding door and out into the yard.

Daryl was heading up to the door at a quick pace while Rick was behind him locking the gate. Kate ran to him, "Daryl!" she said with great relief, but he walked right past her without a word or even a glance in her direction. Kate stood frozen, bewildered, her mouth hanging open and tears forming in her eyes. She looked to Rick who eyed her uncomfortably - a mix of compassion and sorrow. He approached her, laying a hand on her shoulder and saying quietly,

"Merle. He didn't make it. Daryl had to put him down." He walked to the prison block and Kate lamely followed.

Daryl didn't come out of the cell block for the rest of the night - skipping dinner and not saying a word to any of them. Normally Kate would have gone to him, found whichever cell he was holed up in and asked if he needed anything, but after his reaction to her in the yard she decided to give him his space. She didn't want to push herself onto him if he needed to be alone and honestly she didn't know if she could handle the rejection again. The group was particularly somber that evening. No one pretended that they loved Merle so much, but they did all love Daryl and they were devastated for him. They also knew that the Governor was going to come for them and soon. Rick elected to take watch that night and Hershel joined him.

Kate said goodnight and with a sympathetic look from Maggie and Beth she left the common room and headed to her cell. She pulled her flashlight from the back pocket of her jeans and clicked it on, heading up the cell block stairs. Daryl wasn't in his normal spot at the top of the stairs and she wondered where he'd holed up for the night. She entered her cell and let out a startled gasp. Daryl was sitting on the floor against the wall opposite her bed. His knees were up and his forearms rested against them. She shone the light on the ceiling so she could see without blinding him. His face was swollen and his eyes were red.

"Oh Daryl" She said, her voice full of compassion. She dropped to her knees in front of him. He grabbed onto her like he was drowning, burying his face into her stomach, stifling sobs. She cradled his head in her arms, planting comforting kisses on his hair. She wasn't sure how long they remained that way, but she heard some of the others make their way to their cells for the night. Judith woke and made a fuss and they could hear Beth singing a song in her clear voice. After his sobs had turned to sniffing and his grip had slowly lightened, he pulled away from her just enough to look up at her face.

"Can I stay with you tonight?"

"Of course."

Kate stood and held her hands out to Daryl to help him to his feet. He stood and they hugged each other tightly. The bunks were narrow and not ideal for two people, but it didn't matter that night. Kate scooted to the end of the bed and Daryl laid down. She moved to his side, his left arm around her shoulders, her head on his chest just under his chin. She placed her hand over his heart, feeling it beat and fell asleep.


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16 –

\- Daryl -

Daryl didn't sleep much. He wasn't sure how much of that was because of Merle or how much had to do with sleeping next to Kate. Daryl wasn't used to sharing a bed with anyone. Before, on the occasional night he actually ended up staying over with some woman, he was usually too drunk to remember. They probably were too. So he never really knew what it was like to just hold someone. Smell them, feel their soft skin, listen to their quiet breathing.

Once Kate was asleep there in the dark, tucked into his side, it was like his senses were alive. He hadn't known what he needed when he asked her if he could stay, he just knew he couldn't lay alone all night with nothing but the image of Merle staring up at him with those empty eyes. He needed the distraction and it worked. But even here with her, it was hard to escape the ache he was feeling in the middle of his chest.

Merle was far from perfect, a fucking asshole on most days, but for most of Daryl's life Merle provided the only love he got. Merle always looked out for Daryl, in his own way. The Dixon brothers were loyal, if nothing else. But now it was just him.

After the incident on the roof, when Merle was just gone, Daryl told himself he could look for him. As soon as things were secure, after they found Sophia or when the Randall issue was under control, but now there was no one to search for. Without Merle, the one constant in his life, Daryl felt a little untethered. When he had grabbed onto her last night, in a way he was trying to keep a grip on reality, remind himself he mattered to more than just Merle. Laying here now, he did feel embarrassed at his behavior. At pushing her away, only to cry like a pussy in her cell. Would she see him differently now? Were they past worrying about these things? For Daryl, he needed her more than ever and he had already committed himself to her in his heart. He didn't know if she felt the same way.

He could tell she was awake now, even with his eyes closed. He had been listening to her breathing most the night. He opened his eyes and sure enough she was looking up at him sleepily with her bright blue eyes. Suddenly he wanted much more than to lay here with her, but he also felt like running.

"Good Morning." She whispered.

"Morning." He said quietly. In close quarters like these a whisper could carry and he wondered what the rest of the group had heard last night as he cried. The claustrophobic feeling tugged at him again.

"I gotta go talk to Rick. Get somethin' to eat." He whispered against her hair.

"Ok. I'll be down in a minute."

He pulled himself away from her and immediately missed her warmth. He was still fully dressed, just needed to put his boots on. He exited Kate's cell, with a quick look back at her lying on the bunk, and ran smack into Carol who was coming out of her spot two doors down. She was so quiet he didn't even hear her.

"Good Morning." She said, her lips in a tight line and her eyes going quickly from his face to Kate's cell.

He nodded awkwardly and waited for her to go down the stairs before he headed down. He didn't want to end up in a conversation about Merle or his sleeping arrangement. He knew he couldn't duck it forever, but he wasn't ready. Although he was in a better place than he'd been yesterday, he was still struggling with Merle's death. Right now it didn't feel real. If he had lost Merle before the turn he probably would go on a bender for days and hole up wherever he and Merle were crashing at the time.

In the new world, if he had learned anything, it was that nothing stopped for death. You had to keep moving forward or you would be dead too. Maybe it would just be easier if he told himself Merle was still out there, like before. Like he wasn't gone forever.

Once downstairs, Daryl grabbed some dry cereal and a bowl. He was relieved to find Carol nowhere in sight, but Beth and Hershel were there and one of them had made coffee. Hershel approached him quietly and looked sincerely into Daryl's face.

"Daryl, I'm sorry for you. I know that you loved your brother and he loved you."

Daryl nodded. Hershel walked off, already moving expertly with his crutches. Daryl was relieved that Hershel didn't require anything more from him. He also appreciated that he didn't try to dress up his opinion of Merle for the benefit of sympathy. Daryl remembered when his father died; his father's sister came in from Tennessee. He remembered her dabbing her eyes with Kleenex and saying something to him about what a good person his father was. He glared at her, his scars feeling like they were tingling as if in protest of her empty words.

Hershel didn't love Merle. Merle was responsible not only for bringing the Governor down on them, but he had taken Maggie to him. He didn't know exactly what happened to her, but it wasn't good. Hershel's kind words to Daryl, in spite of that, raised his opinion of Hershel in his mind even more, if even possible.

He sat on the steps between the cages, shoveling the bran flakes into his mouth with his fingers, gulping down the black coffee and the lump in his throat. He watched Kate head down the stairs a few minutes later, her tight jeans tucked into her boots, a navy long sleeved thermal with little flowers all over it hugging her curves. She smiled when she saw him watching her and he felt warm inside. Like he belonged with someone. Like she was home. He imagined she was now, for him anyway.

She grabbed some cereal and crossed the room towards him. She asked how he was. How he slept. He could tell she was trying to check up on him without being pushy. Despite their evening together, he could tell she was trying to give him space. He felt bad about how he had treated her when he got back yesterday, but he knew if he had stopped and given her the answers she was looking for, he would have broken down in front of everyone.

"I'm a'right." Was his short reply. She smiled and squeezed his arm.

"I'm gonna go find Rick. We've got to have a plan. Governors gonna be at our gates."

Turns out Rick did have a plan and the group quickly started working on it. They packed up their cells, which didn't take long given how little they had. They also packed up their remaining food. Everything went into the back of the Hyundai. Hershel, Beth, Carl and Judith were going to drive it into the woods and wait there. The rest of them were staying back. If things went bad, which was a big possibility, they'd meet up there and try and make a getaway.

The plan was to draw the Governor's group into the depths of the dark prison. Rick figured they'd either split up to search the prison for them, which would leave them weaker or so many of them would be pushing their way through the narrow, lightless halls that it would be easier to overcome them. Everyone took strategic positions - Maggie and Glenn near the infirmary with easy access back through cell block E, C and the catwalk, Michonne in the boiler room, Daryl and Kate in the generator room and Rick and Carol taking the cafeteria. They would use flash grenades if any of the Governor's people headed near their position, in hopes it would cause chaos and while they were scrambling they could get the advantage.

The Governor had more people, but less than he did (thanks to Merle), and they didn't know the prison. Maybe this would work.

The roar of their trucks coming up the gravel drive was their first warning before the Governor burst through their gates. By the time the bullets were flying, everyone was in position. It turned out it was a short fight. More noise and fear than war.

As Rick predicted, the Governor's people split up - one group headed towards the generator room and the other towards Rick and Carol in the cafeteria. Daryl rolled a flash grenade into the path of the group that headed their way and Kate flipped the switch for the alarms to blare like they did the day Lori died. He and Kate didn't have to fire a single shot, they just put their backs against the door and waited. Those Woodbury 'soldiers' started hollering, shooting and running. They were fleeing out into the yard in a matter of minutes. Maggie and Glenn took position, body armor on, and shot as they fled. The Governor and his people got back in their trucks and left.

After the retreat, the seven of them stood at the broken gate, having pulled it shut and pulling a chain through the links in hopes of securing it. They felt satisfaction at having chased them off, but Daryl knew the Governor wasn't they type to let it be. It was decided they'd follow to finish it. It was a risky move, at Woodbury they would be prepared and have the home field advantage, but they couldn't live in fear.

He saw Maggie and Glenn exchange looks and knew they had their doubts about the plan. Daryl took Kate aside, "I need you to stay here."

"No. I need to help, you guys can't go alone."

He looked at her, surprised at just how badly he wanted to keep her safe.

"I won't be able to do what I need to do if I'm worryin' about you."

She sighed and looked away. He knew she was worried about him, and although he knew he had no right to demand, much less ask, he hoped she would just stay.

"I'll be a'right." He lied, she knew it too. No one had a guarantee. "Please stay here."

"Fine." She said, resigned.

They walked back towards the group. Glenn was just telling Rick that he and Maggie were staying back, that they'd protect the prison if the Governor returned. Kate gave Daryl a pleading look, he knew she was hoping the new information would change his mind, when it was exactly why he'd pulled her aside in the first place. Before she got any idea that he had doubts, he spoke up.

"Kate is staying too. It's just the three of us."


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

Kate

It was early morning before they heard the roar of Daryl's bike signaling their return. The night had been agonizing. The first few hours after Daryl, Rick and Michonne had left to chase down the Governor were bad enough. Kate knew the dangers they were facing. She knew they were outnumbered, out gunned. How many times would they be lucky enough to win against Goliath? Were the three of them going to be able to take him and his people down? Remove the threat? She had her doubts. She also regretted agreeing to stay back. They needed all the help they could get, but Daryl was so protective and insistent. Now, sitting here counting the hours and imagining the worst, she wondered why she had agreed so easily.

As the afternoon gave into night, she tried to tell herself there was a logical reason they were still gone. Maybe they were laying low until it was dark, figuring they had a better chance slipping in under the cover of night.

She watched the sky slowly welcome the sun while perched on the catwalk. She volunteered for watch, knowing sleep wasn't an option. Apparently she wasn't the only one. Carl had joined her immediately and Maggie and Glenn remained in the courtyard. She'd been here too often lately, left, waiting anxiously for Daryl's return. Was this how it would always be? Helplessness and despair had started to drown out any logical reasons she could come up with for their continued absence. She started dwelling on how ridiculous it was to send three people in against dozens. She was keeping her mouth shut though, Carl was just a kid. He didn't need to be burdened further by her fear. Just as she was beginning to think they should talk about going after them, Carl stood up with his hand to his ear.

"I think I hear the bike." His face broke out in a cautious grin.

Kate strained to hear what he did. Sure enough, a few seconds later, she could hear a motorcycle engine and it was coming their way.

"Let's go!" Carl encouraged, but Kate stopped him.

"Let's wait until we see them. What if it's not them. What if it's the Governor and his people. What if they have Daryl's bike. We need to stay in position." She rambled, trying to manage her expectations.

The roar intensified, sending the ambling walkers in their yard into a frenzy trying to follow the sound.

Up the gravel drive came the bike, Daryl and his unmistakable poncho leading the way with their truck and a large gray bus behind him.

This time it was Kate flying to the door, Carl close behind. As they ran down the metal stairs from the cat walk into the common room, Carl called out to Hershel, Carol and Beth that they had arrived.

Out in the courtyard, Daryl was off the bike. Kate approached him with a smile of relief, slipping her arms around his waist and laying her head against his hard chest. He wrapped his arms around her.

Kate looked over at the bus. She recognized Tyreese and his sister, Sasha, the people Rick had chased off when Daryl was gone with Merle. They were helping several others off. Most were older, or children. She looked to Daryl for an explanation,

"The Governor killed all his soldiers. Found them in the middle of the road on the way back to Woodbury. Karen there was the only survivor." He pointed to a pretty woman with curly brown hair. "We took her back to Woodbury where Tyreese and Sasha were standin' guard. The Governor was gone. Never went back. These people were the ones who couldn't fight. Rick told them they were welcome here."

They filed off the bus and all walked tentatively towards Hershel and Carol who were directing them into the cell block. Daryl walked to the back of the truck. It was loaded with what she assumed were supplies from Woodbury. Tied to the open truck gate, wrapped in a brown blanket was the unmistakable form of a body. Michonne was standing next to it somberly.

"Is that Andrea?" Kate asked.

Daryl shook his head and moved towards her body, unsheathing his knife to cut the ropes away.

* * *

There was suddenly so much to do around the prison. For days they had sat like ducks, bored out of their minds and scared to death. Now there weren't enough hours in the day to get everything done.

On that morning the Woodbury group had joined them, the first order of business was to clear the yard of walkers again and begin to repair the gate.

While Rick, Daryl, Michonne, Tyresse, Maggie and Glenn worked on that, Kate, Beth and Carol were helping their new neighbors get settled in. They put them all in "E Block", which had been cleared out by Oscar and Axel. Merle had torn up most of the mattresses looking for drugs, but they were able to collect or repair enough of them to make sure everyone had a bed. They unloaded the truck, which was mostly filled with food and the belongings of those who came back with them. A team would head to Woodbury again to load up anything else they could use.

In the yard, they leaned the piece of fence that the Governor had blasted through back in place. Although it no longer would slide on its rails, they were able to pin it shut with the Woodbury bus. It formed a sufficient enough barrier to keep the walkers out as they worked on clearing the dozens that were inside. With plenty of ammo, they made short work of them and hauled them off. The bus was hardly a permanent solution, but it would buy them some time until they could gather the materials to fix it correctly. Hershel said he even had some ideas that he had been working on.

With the walkers cleared and the fence holding tight, the men turned to digging graves. It was a task they had performed far too often since the first ones Jim had dug back at the quarry camp. The graves were for Andrea and Axel, although they were adding markers for Oscar and Merle as well. That evening, with the sun sinking below the tree line, their group gathered at the growing cemetery to say goodbye. The Woodbury group kept their distance, sensing that this was a private moment for their 'family'.

Hershel, in addition to being their doctor and voice of reason, had also become their preacher. He prayed, read scripture and spoke to the meaning these lives all had and the love God had for them. Kate imagined not all of them still believed in God, but they all seemed to appreciate the tradition of a service, a remnant of life before. After Hershel's remarks, Michonne, who could convey such strength and tenderness at the same time, spoke for Andrea. She recounted how she had found her in the woods that cold day. Andrea had been fighting for her life all night and into the morning after fleeing the farm. Although Andrea would have said that Michonne saved her, Michonne explained that it was the other way around. That Andrea had pulled her out of a dark and lonely place.

Rick spoke to Oscar's bravery. How he had saved Rick's life that day in the generator room by shooting Andrew. How he was more than willing to go to Woodbury to rescue Maggie and Glenn despite having only known them a short while.

"And the man liked slippers!" Kate piped in. She always had a hard time behaving in situations like this.

Carol, who was the only one who had much interaction with Axel once Oscar had died, made them all laugh remembering how he assumed she was a lesbian because of her short hair. After that she discovered he had quite a sense of humor and was a good storyteller. She wished they had all had more time to get to know him better. A shadow crossed Carol's face and Kate's heart went out to her, knowing she was the one with him when he had been shot. Carol really had lost so much since the turn. Kate was impressed by her resilience and hoped that the future would bring good things for Carol.

When Carol had finished, they all looked to Daryl. He chewed his thumbnail and looked at Kate, who smiled encouragingly at him. She knew he wasn't comfortable speaking in front of everyone, even if they were family - especially about emotional stuff. Making the situation more difficult was the fact that he knew there was no one here that was really sorry that Merle was gone. He stuck his hands under his arms, his thumbs hanging out awkwardly, and folded his arms self consciously over his chest.

"Merle was an asshole. Ya all know that. But he was my brother and he was there for me and he died tryin' to take out the Governor and his men, tryin' to give us all a chance." Merle never did nothin' like that in his whole life. That's all I've gotta say."

He stepped back and she wove her hand through his. She knew he still wasn't entirely comfortable with affection, especially publicly, but she wanted him to know he wasn't alone.

Beth closed the services by sweetly singing. Kate figured it was an old hymn, she didn't recognize it, but it fit. When she was done, the group slowly made their way back to the cell block for dinner. When they arrived in the common room they were pleasantly surprised to see someone from Woodbury had been kind enough to light a couple lanterns and heat up enough food for them.

Despite having just said their goodbyes to friends, the meal was light hearted. A huge weight had been lifted from their shoulders and for the first time in a long time they had a home, food in their bodies and no immediate threats. There was talk about next steps at the prison: the gate, water, starting a garden and supply runs. Carol and Kate had started a list of items the Woodbury group had requested, as well as the things needed in C Block.

As they started to disperse, dropping their dishes into the bucket (it was Glenn's turn to wash them up tonight), Daryl leaned towards Kate and whispered, "Wanna go for a walk?"

Kate's face brightened and she shook her head yes. Daryl had been on her mind all day. With the Governor seemingly gone, she was looking forward to getting on with life and that included the chance to spend time with Daryl. A walk was the closest thing to a date she could get these days.

She stood up, grabbed her plate, dropped in in the bucket and headed to the door, Daryl close behind.

With Daryl's flashlight illuminating their steps, they wandered aimlessly around the courtyard, the gravel path and the field. It was a pretty night, with the moon high and bright and the air crisp. They were so used to the gurgling symphony of the walkers that she almost forgot they were there. Daryl remained, as always, on alert and aware of their surroundings, sweeping his light around them every so often, his crossbow strapped to him.

Eventually they stopped at the picnic benches by the basketball court and Kate hopped up on the end of the table, her legs dangling down. Daryl approached her slowly, never taking his eyes off of hers. He pulled his crossbow off over his head and dropped it onto the seat to her right. He still seemed to be a little uneasy when they were close, but it was getting to be more natural for him and tonight she noticed something playful in his eyes. He moved in closely, standing between her knees and after looking in her eyes for a second longer he kissed her slowly. His hands tangled softly in her hair as he gently pulled her head back. Her lips parted, allowing his tongue to explore and he groaned softly. His hands moved down her face and neck, letting them linger around her collarbone. His thumbs resting at the base of her throat.

Kate let her hands explore his broad shoulders and strong arms. God, how many times she had pictured doing just this during the past few months. Her body came alive under his touch. Every nerve felt like it was tingling, every sense was responding. She raised her chest towards him, inviting him to touch her. She drew him closer towards her with her legs, tightening them around him. His hands had dropped to her ribs, thumbs digging into her as if he was determined to keep them there. She lowered her mouth to his neck, scattering slow kisses down and back up. She could taste the salt and dirt on his skin and it increased her desire.

While Kate was coming undone, finally getting a chance to let herself get lost in Daryl, he seemed to be concentrating on keeping control. She could tell he was holding back, his hands still glued to her sides. She lifted her hips, pressing herself into the part of him that was betraying his self-control.

"Dammit Girl!" He whispered against her mouth. "What are you tryin' to do?"

"You don't want to?"

"Hell ya I want to."

"Then what?"

"Not out here. I don't have an rubbers anyway."

She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She smiled conspiringly, "We have watch tomorrow in the tower."

"I traded nights with Glenn. I'm heading out with Michonne in the morning."

The mood changed immediately.

"On a run?" She tried to hide her disappointment and surprise.

"Michonne wants to track down the Governor, finish the job. Wants me to help her find him."

"Seriously? The Governor?" She was annoyed. "Do you really think he'll come back? He doesn't have anyone to fight with him."

"I don't know. He might. Don't seem the type to walk away from a fight."

"So what's the plan then?"

"We are gonna go see if there's any trail to pick up. Go around, search towns for any sign of life. Gather supplies as we go. Should only take a couple of days."

"A couple of days!" She groaned, burying her forehead into his chest.

Daryl laughed.

She raised her head and glared at him. "What's so funny? I don't think this is funny!"

"Nothin'. I just ain't ever had anyone want me to stick around before."

"Well you better get used to it Daryl Dixon." She pouted a little and grabbed onto the edges of his vest, tugging him towards her again. She kissed him a few times before starting in again, not being able to hide her aggravation.

"Two nights?! Seriously. For the record I am not a fan of this plan. I'm so gonna kick Michonne's ass!"

He snorted, "Ya. Good luck with that."

She laughed, "She's not so tough. Seriously though, I thought I could breathe easy for a couple days. Plus, when were you even planning on telling me? "

"I don't know." Daryl said, exasperation in his voice. "I'm not used to this."

"To what?"

"To, you know, being with someone. Having someone care if I stay or go."

She looked at him and knew it was true. She had no doubt Daryl was devoted to her, but she knew this wasn't going to be like any of her past relationships. For one thing, this wasn't the old world anymore, but even then she knew Daryl hadn't been the one people dragged home to meet the parents. The old rules didn't apply.

"It's ok." She kissed him again. "I'm just going to miss you. Miss this."

"I told Glenn when I got back that we'd do two nights in a row in the shack. Figured they shouldn't get all the fun."

"Well, I'll try to look forward to that when I'm not worried about you dying."

"I'll be safe. I have you to look forward to. Can't go dying now."

He kissed her again and she tried to believe him.


	18. Chapter 18

CHAPTER 18

\- Kate -

It was a chilly morning and the sun had just started to shine on the dewy prison yard when Kate made her way outside to see Daryl and Michonne off. She pulled her blue knit sweater, the one she found in an abandoned house shortly after they fled the farm, tighter around her and watched the two of them stack supplies into the back of the green Hyundai. Every time they used that car she thought back to that traffic snarl they had lost Sophia in. It seemed like a lifetime ago, they had lost so many and seen so much since, but it hadn't even been a year.

"I think that's it." Michonne said after the last of their crates were placed in the back.

Daryl shut the hatch and wiped his hands on his pants, glancing up at Kate. Michonne headed to the driver's seat and Daryl waved her on, "Go on, I'll meet you over there." She drove down the gravel drive slowly, stopping at the gate where Maggie and Glenn were standing, ready to help let them out.

Daryl walked towards Kate and for a second she was afraid she was going to start crying so she quickly threw her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest. The familiar smell of dirt, sweat and leather filled her nostrils as she took a deep breath to collect herself. After all the times she had to see him off lately, this was the time she was going to cry?

"Hey, hey." He said gently, grabbing her elbows. "It's only a couple nights. I'll be a'right."

She looked up into his serious face and smiled. He kissed her sweetly, wrapping his arms around her and she let herself enjoy the strength and protection she felt whenever he held her like this. He let go too soon, he always seemed to, and the two of them headed down to the car.

"Don't worry about me. You take care of yourself while I'm gone."

They reached the end of the path and Daryl ducked into the car, but before he could shut the door Kate leaned in and laid a big goofy kiss on his mouth.

"Get out of here girl." He acted annoyed but, although clearly embarrassed, he was still smiling. "You've got a gate to open."

Maggie pulled the Woodbury bus away from the gate. She parked it and hopped down the steps, pulling her knife and waiting for Kate and Glenn to drag it open. Glenn took one side and Kate entwined her fingers around the chain links at her side. On his count they lifted it and awkwardly carried it to the right. Maggie stood ready to take care of any walkers that managed to get through, but Michonne hit the gas and sped down the path before any had a chance. As quick as possible they dragged it back in place. Kate stood watching the car retreat down the road suddenly feeling incredibly lonely.

After maneuvering the bus into position, the three of them headed back up towards the prison. Maggie put her arm around Kate's shoulders and grinned.

"Cheer up. Michonne'll keep your man safe."

Kate laughed.

"She better!"

"Wanna get some breakfast?" Maggie offered.

"I think I'm going to try and get some more sleep in. It's too early for me."

Later that morning, after getting in a few more hours in, Kate headed down to the common room to grab some breakfast. She was happy to see some of the Woodbury group sitting around. Kate was a people person and it was exciting to her to have new people to get to know. She was determined to not just waste her days away on watch, counting the minutes until Daryl returned and the Woodbury folks would provide a welcome distraction.

She approached the first table. Mrs. McLeod, an older Hispanic woman, and a young girl of maybe 12 were sitting across from each other.

"Do you mind if I join you, Mrs. McLeod?"

"Of course not!" The woman smiled.

Kate sat and turned towards the girl. "Its Eryn, right?" The girl shook her head. "Are you guys settling in ok? I know its a big change."

"Yes. So far. Thank you so much for welcoming us." Mrs. McLeod said.

"Of course, we are glad to have you."

Eryn remained quiet and Kate wondered if everything was ok for the girl. What a difficult world to live in as a child and if she remembered correctly she didn't think Eryn had any family come in with her.

"I'm still trying to keep your group all straight in my mind." Mrs McLeod explained. "Are you Maggie's sister?"

"No. Beth is Maggie's sister. Hershel, the man with the crutches, is their father and Glenn is Maggie's fiancee."

"I see. Is Beth the one with the baby?"

Kate smiled, it wasn't the first time Beth was mistaken for Judith's very young mother.

"The baby is Judith. Her mom, Rick's wife, she died giving birth to her. Beth takes care of her a lot of the time."

"Oh no, I didn't realize Rick had lost his wife. That poor baby, without a mother. That is terrible. Eryn here lost her parents too."

"I'm so sorry Eryn." Kate said.

"What about you?" Mrs McLeod continued. "Are you married? Do you have family here?"

"Me? No. I'm not married" Kate hesitated for a second before adding, "Daryl and I are together, but I don't have any family here, well not family from before the turn, but I consider everyone in my group my family now."

"Daryl? Which one is he?" Mrs. McLeod frowned. "He's not Merle's brother is he?"

"That's him."

"Really?" Mrs. McLeod said slowly, a hint of disapproval darkening her response. "That surprises me."

Kate started to feel defensive for Daryl. Maybe she wasn't so eager to get to know Mrs. McLeod after all. Before she had a chance to respond Eryn spoke up.

"What happened to your family?" She was looking at Kate with a mix of sadness and hope. Like she could maybe find comfort in the kinship of tragedy.

"It's kind of a long story." Kate began.

"What else have we got to do?" Mrs. McLeod offered, Kate barely glanced her way. She was still annoyed at her attitude towards Daryl.

"I'm not from Georgia actually. In fact, until just days before everything fell apart, I had never even been here before. I'm from California and that is where my family is. I have no way of getting to them, knowing where they are or if they're even alive. They have no idea if I'm ok either."

"Why were you here?" Eryn asked.

"I had a boyfriend, we hadn't been together long and his parents lived here in Georgia. We flew out for a visit, I was meeting them for the first time. We had heard a few odd stories here and there about a bad flu going around, but nothing that made me think I shouldn't leave. I don't think anyone really believed something like this could ever happen anyway, you know? A couple days into our visit things started to go bad pretty quickly. I called my mom and told her I would try to fly home. That was the last time I spoke to her. My boyfriend offered to go home with me of course, but I could tell he was worried about leaving his parents. I didn't want to ask him to leave them. I was so confident at the time that I would be able to get to LA, I insisted he stay. I left, headed for Atlanta and ended up stuck on the road. There were cars stopped as far as you could see. We hadn't moved an inch in hours. The radio had started directing people to the refugee center in Atlanta, reporting the airport was shut down. I was literally stranded with not a single soul I knew, scared to death and I didn't know what to do. People were getting out of their cars, setting up lawn chairs, some people fighting. Finally, I went up to these two women who had kids with them, figured they were safe. One of them was Carol, the woman here with the short gray hair and the other was Lori, Rick's wife. There was another man who used to be in our group there too, he was a sheriff like Rick was, and when he went ahead to scout he saw that Atlanta was being bombed. He was pretty sure it was Napalm and he knew there wasn't any place safe in the city. He led us to safety. We ended up making a camp at this rock quarry. Our group was pretty big at first, that is where I met Rick, Glenn and Daryl. I've been with them since the beginning."

"Do you think you'll ever see your family again?" Eryn asked quietly.

"I don't know. At first I thought I might. I was hopeful. I thought the government would get it all under control. That it might take a while, but once communications were back up I could find them. Eventually though, I think I realized it wasn't very likely."

Kate got quiet remembering their experience at the CDC and the moment she realized how bad everything really was. After that she spent a lot of time trying to think of some way to get to California or maybe even to her grandfather in Arkansas, but she was hardly capable of such a journey. There were walkers and worse, the people who were thriving in this lawless world. She missed her family so much and most days she was in denial about it. She told herself there was some chance, anything was possible, but explaining it all to Eryn and Mrs. McLeod made it difficult to fool herself and coupled with Daryl being gone, she found herself with tears coming to her eyes.

She waved her hands in front of her face.

"Oh man, I'm sorry. I feel so stupid crying. We've all lost people we love."

"It's ok." Eryn said in a small voice. "I cry all the time."

* * *

\- Daryl -

Michonne headed down the walker dotted road towards the last place they knew the Governor had been. Karen had told them that she heard him drive off heading North as she was playing dead in the field. Daryl didn't really track vehicles, but it was all they had to go on and maybe they'd get lucky.

"You and Kate are cute together." Michonne said with a playful grin, knowing it would ruffle Daryl.

"Cute?" He snarled.

Daryl had never been called cute his entire life and he didn't really want it to start now. He had to admit though, it was kind of nice to hear Michonne say that. He still couldn't believe Kate wanted him and he liked someone else acknowledging it was actually true.

He couldn't stop thinking about how Kate was all over him last night. It surprised him how eager she was to be with him and it had taken a lot of self control to slow it down. He didn't know anything about her sex life before the turn, but he didn't think things would move along so quickly. He was glad, but he had to admit to himself he was nervous too. It wasn't that he was inexperienced. There were plenty of nights that he and Merle had hooked up with women they met in some bar. He was usually drunk out of his mind and it was rarely anything but a one night stand and none of them were meaningful.

The first time he had sex was when he was 16. Merle had gotten out of the army and rescued Daryl from the hell hole he lived in with his old man. If Daryl thought his Dad would insist he stay, he was wrong.

"I don't give a shit where ya go. You've always been more trouble than yer worth you fucking crybaby." He had slurred loudly from his ratty recliner.

Daryl was disgusted with himself for letting his father's words hurt him, but they did. Merle must've sensed it too because he started carrying on about knowing just what Daryl needed. Fifteen minutes later Daryl sat alone in Merle's junky car, parked alongside an alley, while he watched his brother talk to two women in extremely tight skirts and heels so high they barely could walk straight on the broken asphalt as the three of them headed towards him. Merle had opened the door and yanked him out by his arm, shoving him in the backseat next to the one with dark hair. She was wearing a purple top that showed her stomach and her boobs were overflowing. She had a tattoo on her left tit that said, "Ray" and hickies all over her neck. She put one arm around him and the other about two inches from his dick and whispered that her name was Michelle. She smelled like grape gum and cigarette smoke.

Merle pulled into a cheap motel that rented rooms by the hour and came out of the manager's office holding two keys, tossing one to Daryl before grabbing the hand of the other woman and disappearing behind a door.

Michelle took the key from his hand and next thing he knew she was taking his clothes and her own off. It didn't last long and afterwards Daryl didn't know what to do, so he got dressed and headed back out to the car to wait for his brother. Merle and his "date" stumbled out of their room the full hour later and Merle started in on embarrassing Daryl right away.

"So how was it baby brother? Did she make a man of you?"

After that it was just a string of nameless, faceless encounters. He followed Merle's lead and Merle liked women.

He thought of Kate then and felt ashamed of his past. She was so good. Wholesome. He didn't suppose she was a virgin or anything, but he didn't peg her as the type that slept around. He felt like he was walking across the snow in dirty boots. She deserved more than him. She deserved someone who could at least remember half the people they'd slept with.

The other thing making him nervous was that despite the fact that he had been with quite a few women, it was never with any effort to help them enjoy it in anyway. He was worried he wouldn't be any good at that part and he wanted to be for her.

Daryl was thankful when Michonne pulled off the road onto the small main street of the first town they had come to. He needed to get his mind off his past and concentrate on the task at hand.

They made their way through the town quickly. There were several walkers to contend with and most the stores had been looted a long time ago. They got back in the car and Michonne unfolded her map, placing an 'X' over that town before tracing her finger north and pointing to their next stop.

Four towns later and there still was no sign of the Governor or anyone else. They had found some supplies, so it wasn't completely a waste of time, but it was going to get dark soon and they needed to find a place to stay. The pair headed to a neighborhood of houses that was down the road from the main part of town. It was a small cul-de-sac of two story homes tucked back into the trees.

They approached the second house on the right. It looked untouched and they headed around the back to get a better look inside. The property was overgrown and Daryl kept himself from taking aim at several fat squirrels that scurried up trees at their approach. They took the steps two at a time to the wooden deck. Michonne went to the back door and peered through the open blinds.

"Kitchen. It's a little messy. Can't see much else." She rapped on the window and they waited about a minute before she shrugged.

"I got this." Daryl raised the butt of his crossbow and Michonne stepped out of the way as he sent it cracking through a spot near the knob. He reached in carefully and unlocked the door and swung it open.

"Ladies first."

"Oh what a gentleman." Michonne rolled her eyes and headed in, her boots crunching on broken glass, her katana poised for action. They searched the entry level: a kitchen, living room, bedroom and bath. There were stairs leading up and another set heading down to a basement below. Michonne headed to the stairs to the second floor.

"I'll take upstairs, you get the basement."

Daryl grunted in agreement and headed down the narrow stairs, crossbow ready. At the bottom there were two doors. He slowly turned the knob to the one on the left. It was dark down here and he stuck his flashlight through the crack long enough to identify the room as a garage. They could go through it later, it looked promising. He shut the door and turned his attention to the door on the right. He knocked and when he didn't hear anything banging or groaning he slowly eased the door open. The room was pitch black, he grabbed the flashlight out of his mouth and bounced the light around the room. Crouched under a desk he saw a kid about Carl's age, maybe a little older, watching him fearfully from behind dark rimmed glasses.

"Hey kid. It's a'right. I ain't gonna hurt you. You by yourself?"

Daryl moved inside to clear the rest of the room.

"It's...it's just me." The boy said, afraid.

"Well come on out. I said I ain't gonna hurt you."

The kid crawled out slowly, standing with his hands raised like a criminal. Michonne appeared at the door.

"What's your name? This your place? Put your hands down, you ain't under arrest."

"P-Patrick. No, my house is two doors down. I was here looking for food when I heard you guys come in."

"You have anyone back at your place?" Michonne asked.

"No. Just me."

"You tryin' to tell me you've been on your own since the start?"

"It wasn't always just me. My dad was with me, but about a month ago, he went on a run and never came back. I've just been living off what we had, but it's gone now. I've been trying to go through these houses hoping we missed something, except the blue house. There are those things in there."

Daryl looked at Michonne and she must've understood the question in his eyes because she nodded her head.

"We've got a place. It ain't nothin' fancy, but it's secure. Plenty of room, food, good people. We can take you back with us, unless you'd rather..."

"Yes!" Patrick cut him off. "Please. I'll go. Thank you!"

"We'll stay here tonight. Round up supplies and you can get some of your belongings in the morning. We have a few other towns we need to hit tomorrow. Probably spend another night somewhere before heading back to the prison" Michonne explained.

"The, the prison?" Patrick repeated nervously.

"Ya. What were you expecting? A 4-star resort?" Daryl retorted, swinging his crossbow over his shoulder and heading back up the stairs.

* * *

As promised, they returned to the prison two days later. Daryl left Michonne and Patrick in the courtyard to unload the car. He was anxious to see Kate again. He found her in her cell, her back to the door. She was singing, which made it easy for him to sneak up on her. He came up from behind and threw his arms around her, whispering in her ear, "Didja miss me girl?"

She half-screamed, half-squealed before turning in his arms and kissing him eagerly.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'." He said between mouthfuls of kisses. He took a couple backwards steps towards the door, dragging her playfully along with him and stuck his head out of the cell.

"Must be our lucky day. Everyone's gone."

He walked her back to the bed and lowered them down onto the bunk, the days away from him making him bold. She felt so good in his arms, soft and warm and damn she smelled good. Even the way she was breathing turned him on - slow and deep and then suddenly, if he touched her a certain way or moved against her, it would catch and he felt like he was going to lose his mind.

He kissed her ferociously letting his hands roam. He pulled his mouth back a second and she whimpered in protest. He grinned and started sliding his hand up her shirt.

"Hey Kate?"

Rick's voice abruptly pulled them back to reality.

"Whoa! I'm sorry. I didn't realize...I'm leaving." Rick had turned his back, one hand up in a declaration of innocence and the other holding Judith and headed back to the stairs. "I'm sorry you had to see that Judith." They could hear him joke.

Daryl let out a frustrated sigh, dropping his head on her shoulder. Kate covered her face, laughing in embarrassment.

"Goddammit!" Daryl groaned. He rolled off the bed slowly and stood, adjusting the front of his pants. "You better go see what Rick wants. I should go help Michonne unload the car anyway. We actually brought someone back with us - a kid, Patrick."

"A kid? How old? Where'd you find him?"

"About 13. He was holed up alone, in a house we were searchin'. Nice kid. Kind of strange."

"Any sign of the Governor?"

"Nope." He leaned his head down and kissed her. "See you later."

Daryl was unloading the supplies from the back of the Hyundai when Kate walked outside a few minutes later carrying Judith. She smiled brightly at him and his breath hitched. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to the fact that this girl had anything to do with him.

Michonne was standing a few yards away, Patrick happily by her side. She had been introducing him to Tyreese and Greg who were now busy letting her in on plans for the new gate. Greg was one of the newcomers from Woodbury and he apparently had experience as a builder.

"The idea with the wooden spikes is that if there are walkers piled up at the gate, when it swings open they'll be pinned." Greg explained.

"Hey Kate!" Tyreese's enthusiastic greeting caught Daryl's attention and rubbed him the wrong way. "How is baby Judith today?"

Daryl watched as Tyreese leaned down close to Kate to coo at Judith, grabbing a tiny hand in his fingers. Tyreese looked up at Kate and said something that Daryl didn't catch. Kate laughed loudly. Michonne started to introduce her to Patrick then and Kate shook his hand, but Daryl had stopped paying attention. He couldn't get the image of her laughing with Tyreese out of his mind. Had he ever made her laugh like that? Was Tyreese interested in her? Did the new people know they were together? Worse than the thought of Tyreese being interested in her, was the realization that Kate had choices now. He knew she was too good for him, couldn't believe she wanted him to begin with. Maybe that explained it. There wasn't much choice before. Now there was Tyreese, Greg...he tried to think if there was anyone else in the Woodbury group. He was pretty sure Michonne had told him Tyreese had been a pro football player back in the day. Daryl hadn't been anything.

Daryl stopped himself. He remembered the look on her face when he surprised her in her cell, the way she kissed him, how she'd let him touch her. He tried to push the doubts out of his mind and hoped with everything in him that she wouldn't wake up and realize how much better she could do than him.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Kate

A little jolt, like electricity, ran through Kate's body when she looked around the prison yard and found she and Daryl were finally alone. They had headed up to the tower early, right after dinner was done. Since Rick interrupted them this morning in her cell, they hadn't had a chance to talk. These days there was always something to be done and Daryl was always needed somewhere. So at the first chance they got they headed to the relative solitude of the tower and as they watched their growing group take advantage of the last rays of sun they discussed how they'd filled their days apart. As usual, she did most the talking, asking Daryl questions until she had enough information to satisfy her curiosity about his run, filling him in, without prompting, on all the things she'd done in his absence.

Mostly though, Kate was thinking about tonight when she and Daryl would finally get some time alone and just exactly how she planned to use it. She couldn't remember the first time she had actually thought about having sex with Daryl. If she had to guess, it was during the days when Sophia had first gone missing. He was trying so hard to find the little girl, becoming less of a loner and more an actual part of their group. She found he wasn't as intimidating to her away from his brother. On the day they were all searching the woods, the day Carl ended up getting shot, Daryl took the lead. She knew that he was a tracker, knew that it was his hunting that kept them fed on most days, but she had never been with him in the woods, he usually went alone. She had little knowledge of what it entailed, being from a city, and navigating it for the first time under these circumstances was frightening. They had all trudged nervously through the overgrowth, on edge, not sure what they might run into. But not Daryl, he strode ahead confidently. He was in control, focused and fearless. To see him in his element like that was impressive and she felt safe with him out there.

Later in the day, after they'd split up to search for Sophia, Maggie, a stranger to them at the time, had frantically ridden up to them on horseback insisting that Lori come with her, that Carl had been shot. Daryl demanded she stay, "We don't know this girl. You can't get on that horse!" There wasn't going to be any stopping Lori of course, she was a mother fearing for her child, but Kate didn't miss the fact that he was being protective of a member of their group and she found it endearing.

After that, during their days at the Greene farm when they had more time than they knew what to do with, she found herself watching him closer, daydreaming about the way he walked or the way his strong arms looked when he was aiming his crossbow. What they might feel like wrapped around her. There was no intention behind it at first. Daryl Dixon was still the surly redneck he had always been. She could never imagine herself actually being with a guy like him. It was just a way to pass time, or at least that is what she told herself. If she knew then that she would eventually be perched in a prison tower about to give into all those fantasies, she would have been shocked. The only thing that might have surprised her more would be just how much she loved him.

She had been standing at the railing staring off into the trees, lost in her memories of Daryl stalking through the woods, when she looked around the yard and saw that they were alone. She turned to find him leaning against the guard tower, watching her. He had a way of looking at her that sent desire shooting through her bones and she felt her face go red. A small smile quirked the ends of her mouth and she walked slowly over to him, her stomach flip flopping a little with each step.

"Looks like everyone has gone in for the night." She said as she ran her hands up his shoulders before interlinking her fingers behind his neck and kissing him. She looked up at him meaningfully and took his hand to lead them into the seclusion of the shack when he pulled her back to him.

"Kate." Something in the tone of his voice, the look in his eye was suddenly vulnerable. He swallowed hard. "You sure you want this? With me?"

She laughed a little, underestimating the weight of this question. "Daryl, I've spent the last 9 months imagining how many ways I want this."

He breathed out heavily, but remained serious. "Once this is done, it can't be undone."

She felt confused and pulled away from him. "Don't _you_ want this?" She asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

He looked at her carefully.

"Mmm Hmm. 'Bout as much as I've wanted anythin'. But I'm not a fool Kate. I know this ain't exactly a fair trade."

As the realization of what he meant hit her, her heart ached. How could he think so little of himself? She wanted so badly for him to believe just how worthy he was of love.

She stepped into him again and took his rough face in her hands. He met her eyes cautiously, shame lurking just behind his.

"Daryl. I know you. I see you. And yes, I want this." She shook her head with disbelief and her eyebrows were knitted with concern . "Can't you see how much I love you?"

His eyes widened slightly at her confession and the hesitation that was there was replaced by something new. What she wasn't exactly sure - Relief? Gratitude? Devotion? He captured her face and responded with a punishing kiss. She met it passionately, grabbing hold of him tightly and trying to wordlessly echo the feelings she'd just admitted. He walked her backwards towards the door. Running his hands down her back, he grabbed her by the back of her thighs, lifting her to him. She wrapped her legs around him, and they disappeared into the dark room.

The guard tower was freezing, but for once she didn't notice, distracted by desire and the realization that this was actually going to happen. They'd clumsily pawed and pulled at each other's clothes, rushing to get them off and retreating under the thin prison blankets that were spread out on the floor.

Daryl made love like he did everything else - his movements driven by primal instinct and an intensity rolling off his body. There was nothing smooth or practiced about it, but his entire heart and soul was in it.

it was intense and emotional, more so than she had ever experienced before. A culmination of their need for acceptance and connection with another human being, finally belonging completely to someone else in the middle of this torn apart world. A physical manifestation of the devotion they had for one another.

And after, as they laid there exhausted and naked on the floor of that metal shack, high above dozens of hungry walkers, in the middle of the Georgia woods, she knew the significance of what had just passed between them and for the first time in so many months, she felt like she was home.

Daryl

Afterwards they laid there together, Kate curled into his side. She fell asleep quickly, but Daryl couldn't. Could someone be too happy to sleep? Is that what this was?

He was remembering the first time he saw her. She had showed up at the camp early in the morning the night after everything went to shit in Atlanta. She came with Shane's group. Daryl remembered how pissed Merle was when he found out Shane was a sheriff, knowing it would make his plan to rob the camp more difficult. Daryl had just shrugged. As usual he was along for the ride, Merle called the shots and he followed, but he didn't really see the point, there wasn't much to take.

Kate was hard to miss. She was beautiful, even with red-rimmed eyes and a tear stained face. She looked completely lost and scared to death. Merle, who had a knack for spotting the vulnerable, quickly pointed out that she didn't seem to have any family or friends with her.

"Goldilocks over there is all alone. Looks like she could use some comfortin'. Who knows what she'll do for a little protection."

Merle had taken it upon himself to introduce the two of them to her.

"Hi Darlin'. I'm Merle and this is my baby brother, Daryl."

"I'm Kate." Was all she said and Daryl saw the expression on her face as she looked back and forth between him and his brother. They made her uneasy. She felt threatened. He had seen that look hundreds of times before. Merle, always aiming well out of his league, would approach some girl at a bar and it always would be that same look. Daryl hated when he saw Merle headed towards one of those women because he always felt the rejection as if it had been him asking himself and not his dumb ass brother.

Unlike Merle, Daryl knew who he'd have a chance with and he stayed far away from the rest. Kate was definitely in the 'stay away' category. That first night at camp, with the fire low, he watched her sit comfortably with Glenn. They were talking and laughing and acting like they'd been friends forever even though they had just met. Daryl found himself feeling so jealous towards Glenn. Not because of Kate, but because people didn't feel threatened by him. People wanted to get to know Glenn, give him the time of day. Glenn got the pretty girl laughing at his side and Daryl just made her more scared than she had already been.

But here they were now, not even a year later and Kate was asleep in his arms. Her naked body warm against his.

And she loved him.

Thank God for the end of the world.

He couldn't remember when exactly she had stopped looking at him with fear behind her eyes, but he knew he'd never forget what her eyes looked like tonight when she told him she loved him. How long had it been since someone had told him that? Told him that and meant it? He honestly couldn't remember. He didn't know how badly he had needed to hear it.

Laying there with her he made a silent vow. He knew he had done a lot of stupid, fucked up things in his life, but for some reason, God, karma, fate, whatever, had decided that she belonged to him and he was damned if he was going to fuck it up. He would be a better man for her, he would love and protect her, build a life for them and spend the rest of his days trying to be worthy of this woman.


	20. Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20

Kate

"You two are disgusting. I can't even stand it." Maggie teased, pretending to stick her finger down her throat and gag.

"Whatever Maggie! Like you should talk." Kate laughed and drove a piece of rebar through the eye of the nearest walker. It fell with a clink against the chain link fence.

Kate, Maggie and Beth were on fence duty, killing the walkers that were pushing against the outer fence. They had just been gathered in the common room where Rick was informing them of some exciting plans for the prison. The gate repairs had started and after that there were plans to get some water running inside. They might actually get some showers and that was reason enough for everyone to be excited, but Kate had been distracted.

"Seriously, I was trying to pay attention to Rick and all I could see was Daryl making eyes at you like he couldn't wait to have his way." Maggie continued to badger her.

"You're totally exaggerating!" Kate protested, her face turning red.

Maggie turned towards her sister for support. "Beth, did you see it? Tell me you saw it."

Beth looked at Kate apologetically, "I did, but I think its sweet."

"Told you." Maggie said with a triumphant look before plunging a long knife through the fence into a walker's skull.

Kate covered her face laughing. "Oh no. I'm embarrassed and Daryl would die if he thought people were paying attention. Do you think anyone else noticed?"

"Yes!" Maggie exclaimed at the same time Beth said, "No."

They laughed.

"So does Daryl talk at all or do you guys just have sex?"

"Oh my God Maggie! Of course he talks."

"What?! I just can't picture it. He's not exactly a talkative guy. Although I didn't really think he was the boyfriend type either and he looks like a puppy dog following you around."

"Oh I'm sure Daryl would love to hear you say that. Let's change the subject please." Kate shook her head, defeated. "Have you and Glenn decided whether you're having a wedding or not?"

"I don't know. I think whatever we do it'll be kind of simple. I'm not gonna wear a dress or hold flowers or anything. But I kind of like the idea of making a public declaration, you know?"

"Daddy would do a great job." Beth offered.

"He would." Kate agreed. "What does Glenn think?"

"He'd be fine just saying that we are married, but he'll do whatever I want to do."

Beth sighed.

"I always dreamed of a big wedding. A huge dress that Mama would help me pick out, Daddy walking me down the aisle. Now I just hope Rick or Daryl find someone alive out there on a run that isn't 70 or 13. My choices at the moment seem to be Patrick or Carl."

"Don't forget about Mr. Jacobsen. I think he's only 65." Kate teased.

Beth laughed, but there was some sadness there. "I'm serious. I need a boyfriend."

Maggie and Kate looked at her sympathetically.

"It'll happen Bethie. We aren't the only ones alive." Her sister promised.

"Maybe less talking and more killing ladies!" Glenn joked.

The three of them turned to see him and Daryl approaching them.

"Hey guys." Maggie laughed. "We were just talking about you." She looked right at Daryl.

He looked back and forth between the girls, clearly uncomfortable at the idea. Choosing to ignore Maggie, Daryl turned to Kate.

"Can you help me with something for a minute?" He asked.

"Unbelievable!" Maggie laughed loudly as if her whole point had just been proved.

Daryl looked at her, narrowing his eyes, "What's so funny Greene?"

Kate shot Maggie a warning look.

"Nothin' Daryl." She said, still amused, as she turned her eyes to Kate. 'Go on and help your man with whatever it is he so desperately needs your help with. We'll finish up here."

Kate handed Glenn her rebar and apron and walked away with Daryl.

"What was that all about?" Daryl asked.

"Nothing. Just ignore Maggie. She likes giving me a hard time. Where are we going?"

"Generator room." He said with a shy smile, barely meeting her eyes.

They made their way inside the prison, passing a few others on the way. Daryl still wasn't comfortable with all the new faces, honestly Kate wasn't sure he ever would be. Most of them knew that Daryl was a key member of the group and although they were all friendly to him, he always seemed surprised that they'd acknowledge him at all. His usual response was a nod or a grunt. Kate on the other hand was so outgoing that when they were together she more than made up for it.

In the short time it took to get to the generator room, they had stopped several times so she could make small talk. The final time, when Kate stopped to talk to Jeanette, a woman from Woodbury, about how her day was and if she'd been sleeping better, Daryl could hardly hold in his impatience.

"It ain't exactly sneaking off if you talk to everyone on the way." He said to her as they walked away from Jeanette.

She rolled her eyes and smiled. "No one is paying any attention to where we are going Daryl."

They reached the generator room and Daryl shut the door behind them. There wasn't a lock, but the room was split by a row of machines (what kind she didn't know) that formed a private area on the side opposite the door.

Daryl let his crossbow clatter to the cement floor and stalked towards her determinedly. He wasn't going to waste any more time. He backed her against a yellowing wall between two machines and started kissing up and down her neck.

"Pretty cool that we are going to get showers. Hot showers are one of the things I miss the most." Kate began rattling on, acting like she didn't now what they were here for.

"No one said anything about them being hot." Daryl mumbled against her throat.

"Oh I know. I'm still excited." She continued, trying hard to ignore how her body was reacting to his. "Rick said a group is going on a supply run tomorrow. Are you going?"

"Mmmhmm." He said, tugging her shirt upwards. She raised her arms in the air and he pulled it off, tossing it aside.

"How long...will you...be gone." She asked, between kisses, finding it harder to concentrate as he started to push her bra straps off her shoulders with his thick fingers. He ignored the question and instead reached down and hooked her leg around his hip and pressed himself against her. She completely abandoned her questions and grabbed for his shirt. She worked on his buttons while he started on her jeans and then his. She pushed his shirt off his broad shoulders and he was already inside of her - lost in the rhythm, pushing her up against the cement wall. She loved when they were together like this. It was like they were the only ones that existed. Maggie could tease her all she wanted about it being about the sex, but she knew it was more than that. Daryl was addicted to the connection, the reassurance of her love and commitment, the chance to let himself go in the safety of her acceptance. She could see it in his face, feel it in his touch and in the urgency of his movements. When they were alone he didn't have to wonder what people thought of him, he didn't have to be on guard, he could be himself. He did need her. Needed to belong to her and needed her to be completely his in return. And she was.

When they were done she started rebuttoning his shirt, his eyes on her the whole time. She looked up and smiled at him.

"What?" She asked quietly.

"Nothin'. I just like watchin' you."

She smiled again.

"Probably only one day."

"One day?" She asked, confused.

"Your question, before, about how long we'll be gone. Rick thinks there is a place pretty close up in Decatur, we can get a lot of the tools and supplies there. You ok with that?"

"I am." She smiled, glad he was trying to check in with her about his plans. "I've got to get used to it. Its what you do here and I don't mind the short trips so much. Plus things have been going pretty well lately. Where is Decatur? How far?"

"About an hour away, Northeast of here."

They sat on the floor against the wall, Kate with her head on Daryl's shoulder, her hands sitting in his lap wrapped around one of his, tracing the small star tattoo on his hand.

"Anything you want me to get you if I come across it?" He asked.

"Oh I see, there are advantages to sleeping with the guy who goes on the runs." She smiled.

"Hell ya there are. I'm gonna keep my girl taken care of with the best of scavenged goods."

"Well in that case," She laughed. "If you happen to see any curtains or sheets we can hang in my, _our_ , cell. Maybe we can get a little privacy in there and not have to do so much of this sneaking around."

"Good thinkin'."

The door to the generator room opened and Kate and Daryl scrambled to their feet. Daryl grabbed his crossbow off the ground just as Rick, Hershel and Greg appeared.

'Daryl, Kate..." Rick nodded as he greeted them with a huge, knowing grin on his face. The three men just stood there with amused expressions, watching Daryl squirm. There wasn't any logical reason for the two of them to be in there except for exactly what they had been doing and everyone there knew it.

"We were just leavin'." Daryl said, walking quickly past them and out the door. Kate smiled at the three of them and followed him out.

* * *

By all accounts the Decatur run was a huge success. Everyone came back in one piece, Rick's lead on supplies proved to be even better than he had hoped and they had come across a group of twelve survivors. The group consisted of men and women in their 20's and 30's, including a doctor. They had been living in a warehouse for the last six months and their supplies were running low. Sending runners further and further out had worked for awhile, but last week they had lost two of them. When Rick told them about the prison and asked if they wanted to come back they took a quick vote and unanimously decided to join the group.

Kate, who had taken it upon herself to be the unofficial welcoming committee, led the Decatur group to Cell Block B. They had been making progress in clearing out other parts of the prison and there was plenty of room for the newcomers.

"You guys can stay in here. There isn't much in the cells, probably just a mattress, I'm not sure what you brought with you from your camp. If there is anything you find you need, you can let me know and I can add it to the supply list. When they head out on runs they try and keep an eye out for things. It takes a couple trips sometimes, but they usually eventually get it. If its within reason, of course. We sometimes just eat in our common room areas within each block, but we've recently opened up the cafeteria and so more meal prep will happen in there now that we are growing. You guys are welcome to eat in there too. Oh and we even have a library now. That was cleared out a couple days ago and Carol and I have been working to get it all cleaned up - so books!"

The group looked happy to be part of everything. They immeditely started choosing cells, some bunking up together and others walking to the far end of the block to find some solitude.

"We are so grateful to be here." A dark haired man approached her with two others at his side. "I'm David. This is Gabe and Chloe."

"Nice to meet you guys, we are glad to have you. It is really nice having new people around here."

"We'd really like to help. Is there anything that we can get started doing?" Chloe asked.

"Well, there is always plenty to do, but the easiest thing to just start on is fence duty. You might have noticed we have walkers that pile up against the fence. We try to kill them so that there aren't too many at a time. The job never really ends, but we try to have people out there most the time to stay on top of it. There are aprons and tools hanging on the fence by the gravel path. You guys can head out and whoever is on duty now can show you the ropes. Although it really doesn't consist of much. Once everyone gets settled we can see what other jobs there are too."

"Awesome. Thanks again." David said enthusiastically.

"Of course. Please let me know if you guys have any questions or need anything. I'm in Cell Block C. " Kate turned and headed out the door.

Daryl, Rick, Michonne and Glenn were unloading the trucks in the courtyard.

'Did you get them all settled in?" Rick asked as she walked up.

"Yes. I think they are going to be a good addition. Everyone is so nice and they seem eager to help out."

"Group that big, surviving as long as they have. Seems like they'll have some skills to contribute - plus Dr. S. They might be worth it just to have another person with some medical skills around." Michonne added.

"Definitely more mouths to feed though." Daryl sounded concerned. "I'll probably head out in the morning to hunt. See if I can get some meat in here. Haven't been out enough lately."

That night as they got ready for bed, Kate sat on the edge of the narrow bunk rubbing some lotion Daryl had brought back all over her legs and watching him straighten the blue and yellow curtains he had found and hung over their cell door.

"They are perfect." She said appreciatively, clapping her hands together. She was genuinely excited, now she could change her clothes without having to worry about someone walking by.

"I found enough for everyone in C. I'll keep looking each time I go, probably a good idea if everyone has them."

He stood in front of her, shirt off, fiddling with his belt.

"We got a bunch of tools on the run. I think I can manage to get the bunks off the wall. Maybe Glenn and I can go with the truck and get a couple mattresses from an abandoned house or something. There wouldn't be room for much else in the cell, but it would be better than the bunk."

"Seriously? That would be awesome. We've been sleeping on a mattress that God only knows how many prisoners have slept on, any real mattress would be amazing and we'd have more room."

He leaned down and she scooted back towards the wall before he climbed onto the narrow bed and pulled her into his arms.


	21. Chapter 21

CHAPTER 21

Daryl

Over the years, Daryl had woken up in so many different places it was impossible to keep track. When he was a kid he usually fell asleep in front of the little TV in their one room trailer. The TV only got about four channels and that was if you could get the antennae pointing exactly the right way. One night, when he was maybe 10, his old man wanted to watch some movie and he made Daryl stand holding the antennae in one awkward position for over an hour. Daryl didn't dare complain, even when his arms started to ache and his fingers tingled. He knew better. His father had been drinking all day and hadn't let up. Eventually though, no matter how still he was trying to be, the screen went all squiggly. His old man stood, stumbling drunk and screaming. He ripped the metal rod off the back of the TV and hit Daryl all over his body with it until he tired himself out. Daryl slept in the woods that night. He did that a lot on the bad nights.

When he got older, after Merle came back for him, they never stayed in one place very long. Sometimes they'd crash with whoever Merle was sleeping with. He always had two or three women who would always take him in and Daryl was part of the deal. He'd crash on their couch and have to listen to Merle fucking whoever it was every night until Merle would eventually piss her off and they'd have to move on. One time it was because he'd taken all the pills, another time some chick caught Merle sleeping with her sister. But no matter what Merle did, the same women would eventually take them back in.

If they came into some money, selling a deer or fixing someone's car or bike, Merle would get a motel room for a couple nights. And if all else failed, there was always the woods.

Since the turn, Daryl had stayed consistently in one place more than he had in years. The prison was the best home he had known and now when he woke up he was usually wrapped around Kate. The bunk allowed so little space that they didn't have any room to change position and he'd sometimes wake up with a crick in his neck or his arm dead asleep, but he didn't care, he'd never been happier in his entire life than when he woke up and realized she was real and in his arms.

On this particular day, Daryl rose early, pulling himself reluctantly from her warm body and dressed quickly in the dark.

'Where you going?" She asked, as he kissed her goodbye.

"Hunting. Remember, gonna try and get a deer for Maggie and Glenn."

"Oh ya." She smiled, still half asleep. "Be careful."

Daryl headed out the cell and down the stairs quietly. Hershel was the only one up, out in the common room reading his Bible.

"Mornin' Hershel."

"Good morning Daryl. Heading out to hunt?"

"Thought I'd try. What are you doin' up so early?"

"My leg bothers me sometimes. Especially now that it's so cold."

"You need me to pick somethin' up for it on a run, you let me know."

"I appreciate that Daryl. But I think I'm going to have to learn to live with it."

Daryl nodded. "You're a tough bastard Hershel."

He headed out into the cold, misty morning. Tyreese was on watch and climbed out of the tower to let Daryl out. The new gate was working perfectly. The few walkers that were drawn close enough, were pushed right into the stakes allowing Daryl to slip out quickly. He only had to put down two more before he slipped into the woods. He quietly made his way through the trees, looking for any sign of deer or other animals he could hunt.

Maggie and Glenn had decided to have their wedding, if you could call it that, tomorrow. It was just going to be out in the field with whoever wanted to go. Hershel would perform the ceremony. As far as Daryl knew he wasn't official or anything, but he was the closest thing they had to a preacher and these days no one was keeping track of those things anyway. Kate told him that Maggie wasn't looking for anything fancy - no dress, no flowers. She just wanted to make it official and she wanted witnesses.

Glenn wanted something special for Maggie. He knew that most women spent their growing up years picturing the whole fancy wedding day and the big party afterwards. Glenn couldn't do anything about the dress or the fancier things, but he had an idea for a celebration.

Every time he'd been on a run recently, he collected any CDs he could find - in people's homes, in abandoned cars, on shelves in stores. On the afternoon of their wedding, he was going to pull one of the cars out to the field and with the doors wide open and the speakers turned up, they'd play whatever songs they wanted from the CDs he'd found. He had even picked out a first dance song from the selection. He told Daryl he remembered that at his sister's wedding that was a big deal to her and thought maybe it would be to Maggie too.

Daryl knew next to nothing about weddings. He had been to one once, as a kid. His aunt, his mother's sister, was getting married at the little church in the town his Mama had grown up in. Her folks didn't have much, but she had had a nice enough life before she got pregnant with Merle at 15 and ran off to marry a no good Dixon. As the years went on, she saw her family less and less. Daryl figured she was mostly ashamed of how life had turned out. When her sister got married though, his Mama bought him and Merle new shirts with collars. His father refused to go and told her it was a waste of money dressing his boys up like sissies to try and impress people who thought they were better than everyone else, but for once his Mama didn't let him stop her and so Daryl knew it must've meant something to her.

He'd seen enough movies since to know that girls did seem to care and he thought what Glenn was planning for Maggie was really nice. Glenn had asked Daryl if he could get some meat for the party, preferably a deer, but anything that would make it a little more special. So that's how Daryl found himself out in the woods on the trail of wedding supper.

Several hours later, miles from the prison, he had a big buck. It was large enough that he knew he'd have to field dress it in order to get it back. It was riskier this way, standing in the woods and opening up the deer, potentially attracting walkers, but he wasn't going to be able to drag it back on his own.

It was late in the afternoon before he arrived at the prison, covered in dirt and blood and dragging the gutted deer behind him. Carl opened the gate and Rick ran out to help Daryl get in without too much interference with the walkers.

Glenn was heading down the gravel path from the prison with a big smile on his face.

"Thanks Daryl! This is so awesome."

Daryl took the deer to the side of the yard to skin it and break it down. He would have preferred to let it age, but the wedding was tomorrow and fresh deer meat was still better than spam or whatever they had in cans in the cafeteria. By the time he was done and had cleaned up as much as he could in the buckets of water Glenn had brought up, it was almost dark.

After stopping by the cafeteria to grab something quick, he made his way up to their cell. He found Kate sitting Indian style on the bunk, her back against the cement wall, reading a book. The little battery operated camping lantern wasn't very bright and so she had it next to her on the mattress.

"Hey." She said, her whole face lighting up with a smile that thrilled him. "I hear you got a deer!" She tossed the book aside and leaned forward to meet his kiss.

"Yep. Big son of a bitch too. How'd you know?"

He leaned his cross bow against the wall and started to change into clothes a little cleaner than the current ones which were caked with dry blood.

"Beth was up here awhile ago. She thought I'd be happy to know you were back safe."

"Did ya have a good day?"

"Ya. I kept busy. Did some fence duty, took Judith for a while and helped get dinner going. After dinner, Beth and I were playing this card game, Phase 10, with some of the Decatur group. Chloe brought the game with her. It's a lot of fun."

Daryl kicked off his boots and laid on the bed, his head in her lap.

"Which one's Chloe?"

"Um...she has long brown hair, wears a headband a lot. Does fence duty."

Daryl started chewing on his thumbnail, shrugged and mumbled something about not being able to keep everyone straight. Truth was, he was gone on runs a lot, or hunting and even when he was around he wasn't the most social person in the group.

"You like playin' cards?"

"Well this isn't a regular card deck. It's kind of like Uno or something like that. It was nice getting a chance to just play, but weird. It felt like camp or something, sitting around the table with a lantern and just laughing."

"Wouldn't know, I never went to camp."

"I went a couple times. Well, not like summer camp, but church camp. For a week at a time or whatever."

"Kiss many boys at church camp?"

"Maybe."

Daryl asked the question jokingly because all the movies he had ever seen about camp always had everyone hooking up, but he didn't really think Kate would have said yes. He was surprised how jealous he felt over some boy who was probably a walker by now.

He looked up at her, "How many?" he demanded, only half joking.

"Well if I tell you, you'll have to answer the same question."

"Well that's easy. I ain't ever kissed any boys."

She laughed and slapped his chest.

"You know that's not what I meant!"

"What are you doing kissin' at church camp anyway? Weren't you supposed to be prayin' or readin' your Bible?"

"I don't know. He kissed me. It was only the one guy anyway."

"I want to punch him in the face."

"Daryl Dixon, are you jealous?!"

"I just don't like the idea of anyone kissin' my girl."

"Believe me, no one has kissed me like you before. Besides I don't exactly like the idea of anyone kissing you either."

Daryl shook his head and rubbed his hands over his face.

"You ain't got nothin' to worry about there. You're the best girl I've ever had. Ain't even worth discussing."

Kate was running her fingers absentmindedly through his hair. It was weird how such a little thing could make him feel so loved. He couldn't explain how being alone with her quieted the fight inside him, but it was more addicting than any drug he'd tried.

"Did you get something to eat? Want me to go down and grab something with you?"

"I ain't leaving this cell 'till morning and neither are you." He growled.

He turned over, grabbing her legs and dragging her down next to him, kissing her and covering her body with his.

Kate

Maggie and Glenn exchanged vows in the yellowing grass of the prison field. Almost everyone had made their way out to witness the joyful moment, a fun departure from the normal routine. Hershel kept the ceremony short and simple, but it was still emotional. He spoke about being a helpmate to one another and how the importance of that in this current world couldn't be overstated. When he spoke of the deep love Maggie and Glenn shared for each other, Kate couldn't help but look up to the man at her side.

After the bride and groom shared their first kiss as man and wife, which was met with enough hootin' and hollering to remind her she was in the south, Rick pulled the truck down from the side yard. Carl fiddled around in the front seat and Rick climbed into the bed.

"Hey everyone, Glenn and Maggie didn't ask me to give a speech..."

"You'll always be my best man Rick!" Glenn yelled out with a big smile.

Rick smiled back at him, "...but there are just a couple things I wanted to say. The circumstances that brought us all together, that even led Maggie and Glenn to meet, have been terrible. No one wanted a world like this and everyday we are faced with this reality and the challenges and darkness that come with it. The first time I met Glenn, he was saving my life. And everyday since then he has worked hard for this group, was willing to put himself on the line to keep people fed and safe. Since Glenn met Maggie, those of us who have been around to witness their love grow, have been lucky to see two people continue to live and find joy in this life, despite the circumstances. I'm so grateful to count them as family and I'm so happy they found each other. So here's to many years together."

Everyone clapped and Maggie and Glenn kissed sweetly.

Rick continued.

"Now some of you may be wondering why I dragged this truck out here. Well, Glenn, being the romantic man that he is, has made some plans of his own..."

Everyone, including Maggie, looked at Glenn who just looked at her and smiled.

"...we have a collection of music here that he has been gathering and we are going to crank up the volume on this thing and y'all can dance and enjoy the music. Feel free to come look through the songs. Carl and Patrick will be our DJs for the night."

Carl tipped his hat and Patrick did some awkward cheer with his arms.

Kate laughed. Patrick was such a goof, but everyone loved him. He was so happy to be here.

"Also, if you haven't already caught a whiff of that smell, we have a deer on the grill, thanks to Daryl. I think it won't be too much longer before you can grab some of that. And finally, and then I'll let you get to it, Glenn has picked a song out especially so he and Maggie can have a first dance. So Carl, if you want to start that up. Congratulations to the happy couple!"

Kate looked at her friend, who was beaming at the thoughtful man she had just married. The first notes of some country song Kate didn't know played through the speakers and they all watched Maggie and Glenn dance.

The afternoon was just the thing their growing group needed. A celebration to give them all a break from the life they'd all been fighting through. The picnic tables that were normally up in the courtyard had been moved down to the field as well as any other chair not nailed down in the prison. Kate looked around at the smiling faces as they sat and ate their fill of deer off of the orange prison plates, happily talking to one another and enjoying the music.

Although their selection of songs was limited, it had been so long since they had gotten to listen to any, even the tired tunes and overabundance of country music somehow sounded beautiful to her. Kate didn't expect Daryl would ever want to dance, but she had fun with Beth, Maggie and Chloe.

Rick, who was a good dancer, took a turn spinning some of the girls around the grassy field. First Carol, then Beth and finally Michonne. Kate noticed that the playfulness he displayed with both Carol and Beth had all but disappeared as he moved Michonne around the long grass. She wasn't sure if that was due to something brewing between the two of them or if he was just still not as comfortable with her as the others.

Daryl hung back, still not at ease in the larger group or really with being social at all. Kate watched as he worked at the grill or headed to the fence to help contain the growing number of walkers being attracted by the music, an unexpected side effect to their fun. She didn't mind Daryl's reluctance to be in the middle of it all. She knew it wasn't his thing.

She was standing with Rick, Michonne and Sasha, talking and laughing when David from the Decatur group approached her.

"Hey Kate," He said, giving a friendly smile and nod to the rest of them. "I was wondering if you'd like to dance with me?"

Patrick had just started playing a slow song and she saw that Maggie and Glenn, as well as Karen and Tyreese were dancing already.

Her friends grew quiet around her, trying their best to pretend they weren't paying attention, looking off in the distance and exchanging looks with each other.

"Oh thank you so much for asking David, but I shouldn't." She stopped short of explaining she was spoken for. She didn't want to over estimate his intentions. He probably just wanted to have some fun.

He looked a little embarrassed, but seemed good-natured enough about it.

"Well if you change your mind, come find me."

She managed a small smile as he walked back to a few of his friends.

Rick gave a low whistle. "That there is a brave man." He laughed, shaking his head.

"Or maybe he has a death wish." Michonne suggested. "Where is Daryl? Did he see it?"

"Did I see what?" Daryl's voice sounded behind them and they all turned to see him walking up.

"David just asked Kate to dance" Sasha replied, they were quickly discovering that she was never one to mince words.

"Now you've done it." Rick chuckled.

Daryl looked at Kate, like he needed her to explain the situation.

"It wasn't a big deal." She assured him with a smile. "I told him no."

Daryl scowled, eyeing everyone in the yard. His body had taken on a defensive posture and he looked like an animal ready to pounce.

"Which one of these fools is David?" He snarled.

"Easy Daryl," Rick said calmly, a grin on his face. 'I don't think he meant anything by it. I doubt he even knows you two are together."

Daryl kept looking over at the small group from Decatur, but he didn't say anything more. When Daryl was worked up she could practically feel the hum coming off his body. Kate wasn't sure what to say to calm him down, she knew Rick was probably right. Between all the runs Daryl went on and the hunting most the time they spent together was in their cell and even when they were out among other people, Daryl wasn't really into open displays of affection. But explaining that now would probably be a waste of time.

"As much as I hate to say it, we probably need to cut this short soon." Rick said, changing the subject "More walkers coming to the fence than I thought. Probably wasn't a very good idea. We'll have to double up on fence duty the next few days to get on top of it."

"I'll head over now and clear some out." Michonne offered.

"I'll come too." Sasha said. Always looking for an occupation, the two women headed towards the fence.

"I think there is a little stereo in the library. Might need batteries, but we could probably find some for the special occasion. Maybe we could move inside?." Kate said.

"Great. Cafeteria is probably big enough. I'll send Carl in to get that going."

Rick walked over to Maggie and Glenn to explain the new plan. Kate watched them both look to the fences and shake their head in agreement. Rick hopped back into the bed of the truck.

"Sorry everyone. Change of plans. We didn't anticipate, although we probably should have, the amount of walkers being drawn by the music. We are going to move inside, to the cafeteria, and continue this celebration in there. We could also use a few more people helping out on the fence, so if you get a few minutes tonight and you want to help down there, that would be great."

The group slowly broke apart, most headed up to the prison for more fun. A few others walked to the fence, grabbing aprons and weapons. Kate began collecting dishes that had been left behind while Daryl talked to Patrick while the teenager was gathering the CDs. The only other people left in the yard were the half dozen or so that were at the fence and they were working a spot near the gate.

As she grabbed the last dish the truck's speakers came alive with the soft opening piano notes of "I Can't Help Falling in Love With You" and Elvis's unmistakable voice drifted through the air. She turned to see Patrick had left and Daryl stood leaning against the truck. His eyes were fixed on her and his arms were crossed over his chest, but as a smile broke out on her face he took steps towards her and extended his hand.

She took it and he gathered her to him, his hand pinning her's to his chest and the other wrapping tightly around her waist. She slipped her other hand around his neck.

"I ain't any good at this." He apologized.

They stood there, swaying to the music, barely moving their feet. It was more like a drunken hug than actual dancing, but she didn't care whether he was a good dancer or not, she was just thrilled they were dancing at all. She knew this wasn't easy for him. She closed her eyes, resting her head against his shoulder and pressing her face into his chest. She felt like she was on a date instead of dancing in a prison yard.

The song ended, too soon for her, but she didn't miss the look of relief on Daryl's face.

"Thank you. That was very romantic."

He rolled his eyes, "I don't know about that." He mumbled, walking to the truck to turn off the music.

Once the speakers fell silent the growl of the walkers could once again be heard and she looked towards the fences where some more people had joined the fight and caught sight of David watching them. She felt a twinge of guilt for not explaining to him further why she didn't dance with him and promised herself she'd explain when she got the chance.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

KATE

Daryl was on the road again. Michonne had gone on searches for the Governor a few times since their first attempt, but she wanted to go further and no one (except Michonne) thought it would be a good idea for her to attempt that alone.

Daryl thought they'd be gone two nights - three at the most. So Kate put on a brave face and kissed him goodbye. She had made a great effort lately to not just sit and worry while Daryl went on runs. In the three months since Woodbury, he had been countless times - gathering supplies, bringing back new survivors, hunting. By nature Daryl was a wanderer. He didn't do well staying inside for too long. He needed freedom, time to explore, a purpose outside of the prison walls. In every way he had surpassed her expectations of him as a partner, he had surprised her with his affection, his tenderness and his thoughtfulness. He might do those things in his own way, like waiting until they were alone to dance with her, but he was always trying to be so good to her even if it was out of his comfort zone.

Kate decided the best way she could be a good partner to Daryl was to give him the freedom to go and provide a loving place for him to come back to. She was doing her best to not complain or impose her anxious feelings about his excursions on him.

As often as Daryl went, Kate hadn't been out of the prison gate in weeks. She had always been a homebody and the dangers lurking on the other side made it even less appealing. Occasionally she would hunt with Daryl or go with him on a run, if the area had been scouted and he felt it was safe enough. He was overprotective to say the least, but it made her feel safe and that was something she needed. She was perfectly content spending most her time on the safe side of the fences.

But on the second day Daryl was gone, Chloe from the Decatur Group mentioned that she was going on a run. Gabe had asked Rick if a few of them could make a trip themselves. They felt, as a group, they'd had weeks to settle in and since they'd been used to scavenging for supplies themselves, several of them were anxious to get back to it. Rick had been for the idea, with some conditions. Since a simple run had been what lead the Governor to the prison in the first place, Rick wanted to make sure that certain steps were taken to ensure no extra attention was drawn to them.

On this first trip out, he wanted Glenn and Maggie to lead the group and he wanted it to be a short trip - just a few hours. The plan was simple enough and when Chloe told her about it Kate had the sudden impulse to go. She figured it would keep her occupied, get her out of the prison for awhile.

The eight of them loaded up in the truck and the Suburban and headed to a small town East of the prison. The idea was to go through some of the shops and if they didn't have any luck, maybe explore a couple houses.

Kate jumped into the truck with Maggie, Glenn and Chloe. Gabe, David, Kelly and Mark took the Suburban and they headed down the road. Half an hour later they turned down a small street with a row of shops and a water tower at the end reaching into the sky. They parked between a one screen movie theatre and a dentist's office and got out, gathering at the tailgate.

"Let's split up into two groups," Glenn instructed. "Maggie and I will head over to the hardware store. Anyone want to take the thrift shop at the end?"

"I'll do it." Kate volunteered.

"I'll go too." David offered.

Kate glanced at him and he smiled. She felt a little uneasy, she hadn't talked to him since the wedding and now she wished she had. Rejection was never something she had been good at, she was always too afraid of hurting someone's feelings.

Glenn continued with the plan. "Ok, Mark and Chloe, you come with us and Gabe and Kelly head with Kate and David. If there is any trouble, shout and everyone will come running."

The two groups headed in opposite directions, packs and weapons in tow. Kate stood in front of the brick storefront of the little thrift store and Gabe knocked loudly on the window. They waited a couple minutes and when nothing appeared David took a crowbar to the door and they headed in single file. They swept the store carefully, finding it empty of walkers.

Kate looked around. The store wasn't untouched, but there were still a lot of things remaining. In the front there were racks of breakable dishes and decorative items. Things they had no use for anymore. The walls hung with framed prints, all with neon green stickers on the lower right corner listing their price. She stopped in front of a big picture of a black Labrador standing in a pond with a duck hanging limply from its mouth. The mat around the painting was a camouflage print.

"Who wants this stuff in their house?" she asked Kelly who walked by on the way to the shoe section.

"My Granddad, that's who. He had that same one in his living room."

Kate shook her head. She still wasn't used to Georgia.

The entire right side of the store was racks of clothing. The once well organized rows now were littered with fallen items and broken, plastic hangers, but there were still plenty to search through. She walked through the aisles, reading the little computer printed signs taped to the end of each one. She stopped at the baby section and started flipping through the tiny pieces of clothing looking for stuff Judith could wear. She was growing so quickly and the few items she had were getting too small. She stuffed a couple pairs of miniature jeans and a little knit sweater into her pack as David approached.

He stood opposite of her, absentmindedly glancing through the clothing. She continued to sort quietly through the baby items, occasionally finding something useful and adding it to her bag.

"Can I ask you something." David finally broke the silence.

"Sure." Kate said, without stopping, moving to the next aisle that had rows of men's clothing and stuffing a black and green plaid flannel for Daryl into her pack.

"At the thing for Maggie and Glenn, you wouldn't dance with me, but then I saw you dancing later with Daryl. Is he your boyfriend or something or are you just not interested in me?"

The term boyfriend seemed so inadequate to Kate. It sounded temporary and casual. It made her think of dates at a miniature golf course and late nights on the phone. High schoolers had boyfriends. Daryl was her entire world.

"Daryl and I are together. That's why I didn't dance with you. Sorry, I should have explained."

David's face darkened a little and he started to say something but apparently thought better of it because instead he just mumbled something to himself and shook his head.

"What?" She demanded. She hated when people did that.

"I just think you could do better than _that_ guy." He said it with a certain amount of disgust that immediately made her angry.

"Really? Better than " _that_ guy" that keeps you fed? You wouldn't even have a place to live if it wasn't for Daryl."

"So is that why you're with him? So you have a place to live? Food to eat? Because, Kate, I've been going over it in my mind and I really can't figure it out."

"Fuck you." Kate rarely swore like that, but in that moment it was either that or slapping him across the face. She couldn't believe he was saying these things, did he really think she was that kind of woman. "You don't know me and you definitely don't know Daryl. You aren't half the man he is."

"Kate, I'm sorry, it's just that..."

"It's just what, David? You know what, never mind, do me a favor and don't talk to me and I'll return it by not mentioning this conversation to Daryl."

"Kate, I just, what are you doing with a guy like that? What does he have, like an 8th grade education, I know you aren't from around here, but backwoods guys like that..."

"Are you serious right now? I don't know who you think you are or why you think you have any right to insult us, but you're a guest at the prison. Don't forget that." She said, staring at him with cold eyes, finally satisfied when he looked remorseful.

She started back to her search, the hangers screeching against the metal bars as she angrily flipped through them. David wandered a few aisles over.

To say she was pissed was an understatement. In the process of welcoming and getting to know the Decatur group over the past several weeks, Kate had interacted with David a lot. He was always around when she and Beth played cards with them and sometimes they'd talk when she was on fence duty at the same time, but it wasn't until he had asked her to dance that she became concerned that he had misinterpreted her friendliness as anything but that. Since then, she had kind of kept her distance. She guessed she was hoping he would just have lost what little interest he might have had, but apparently he was planning to tell her exactly how he felt and if that meant tearing Daryl down on the way he was fine with that.

She was pulled from her thoughts by a loud, terror filled scream. They ran for the door. As David threw it open and they headed into the sunlight they found a small clutch of walkers, maybe a dozen, had descended on the narrow street that ran in front of the building. Mark lay on the ground in front of the hardware store, writhing and bleeding profusely from his neck. A dead walker lay next to him, a knife sticking out of its skull. Chloe, who had been the one who screamed, stood next to him in shock but hadn't pulled a weapon. Maggie and Glenn were fighting off walkers as best as they could with their backs to the store.

Kate pulled her knife and quickly approached the closest walker from behind, slamming the blade through its matted hair and into its skull. It fell with a thud. David was fighting next to her and she heard Kelly cry out when she spotted Mark on the ground. When the six of them had finished off the last of the dead, they stood bloodied and out of breath, looking at one another, assessing everyone for injury.

Chloe's strangled cry drew their attention to Mark who had died sometime during their battle and had slowly started to come alive again. Glenn acted quickly, driving a knife through the side of his head. Mark fell back to the ground, stilled forever. Kelly turned and threw up on the asphalt.

The drive back to the prison was solemn. Kate watched from the backseat as Maggie and Glenn exchanged concerned looks with one another. Chloe was slumped against the window sobbing.

They drove through the gates and parked in the prison courtyard. The seven of them slowly pulled themselves out of the vehicles. Rick and Carl jogged up from the gate, their boots crunching on the gravel. Kate could tell they had spotted the body in the back of the truck and she didn't miss the relief that flooded Rick's face when he knew she, Maggie and Glenn were safe.

"What happened?" Rick asked, his voice a mix of concern and compassion.

"Walkers." Glenn spoke up. "We entered the stores on a deserted street and came out to a group. Mark walked out without looking first and ran smack into one. We managed to fight off the rest."

Rick nodded and sighed heavily.

"Everyone else ok?" He looked around at them, they were all bloodied and in a daze. Kelly and Chloe had silent tears streaming down their filthy faces. Glenn nodded.

David approached Rick.

"I realize we're only guests here." He began, giving Kate a sharp look. "But would it be OK if we buried Mark in your cemetery?"

"Of course it is. I'll help you." Rick turned and looked at Kate curiously, obviously not missing the point David had tried to make.

Kate averted her eyes.

The men all grabbed shovels and headed down the grassy slope to the gravesites. An hour later, joined by the rest of the Decatur group, as well as Hershel, Carol and Beth, they laid Mark to rest.

After he was buried, Kate stood under the catwalk between two of the cement cell blocks washing her bloodied arms and face off in a bucket of water that she had filled from the big blue barrels. She kept going over the afternoon in her head, it had turned out so differently than she had imagined. She thought it would be an easy run, she could get outside of the walls, keep her mind off of worrying about Daryl. Instead she had an unsettling conversation, witnessed a man's death, fought off walkers for the first time in a while and was now feeling guilty about the words she chose to use with David. She felt tired, sad, a little ashamed and incredibly homesick for Daryl. She cupped handfuls of water onto her arms over and over until all the dried splashes of black blood were gone. She wished the showers were up and running so she could wash away the sorrows of the day. She leaned over the bucket, splashing cold water over her face.

* * *

-DARYL-

Daryl and Michonne pulled through the gates of the prison having had zero luck finding any sign of the Governor, but with plenty of supplies to show for their efforts. They probably could have pushed on further, but Daryl was anxious to get back. It wasn't just because he missed Kate when he was gone, but he worried about whether she was safe or not. He'd pointed out to Michonne more than once that it was just as likely that the Governor would show up at their gates as it would be that they'd find him in their searches. Every time they headed up the road to the prison he would find himself holding his breath until he saw the gate standing and people carrying on with their duties as they should.

Once they were safely on the other side of the gate, Michonne slowed the car and Daryl rolled down his window. Rick walked up, resting his arm on the top of Daryl's door and peering in at them.

"Did you have a good run?"

"Got a lot of supplies, no sign of the Governor." Michonne replied.

Rick nodded.

"How'd it go here?" Daryl asked.

Rick sighed and looked up towards the prison.

"We let a small group go on a run. It didn't go well. They came across a group of walkers, Mark from the Decatur group was killed. We just finished burying him."

Daryl and Michonne looked towards the cemetery.

"Daryl, I should tell you, Kate was on the run."

Rage and fear flooded through Daryl's blood.

"What the hell Rick?! What the fuck did you let her go on a run for?" Daryl snarled.

"Daryl, she's a grown woman, if she wants to go on a run, I can't stop her. I'm not her father, I'm done forcing people to do things. Whether she stays or goes is between you two."

Daryl glared at Rick. The car suddenly felt very small.

"Well either drive up there or let me out of this damn car." He threw his arm up towards the prison.

Rick and Michonne exchanged a look and she put the car in drive and headed to the courtyard. She had barely come to a stop when he threw the door open and burst out. There were about six or seven people roaming around the courtyard, but Maggie's face was the only one he really knew, he stomped up to her.

"Where's Kate?"

Maggie looked a little taken aback, Daryl was clearly angry, but she pointed towards the water barrels and said, 'I think she is washing up." and he turned and stormed around the cement building and out of sight.

Daryl found Kate splashing water on her face, her back towards him. Emotions warred inside him: anger, relief, worry. Part of him wanted to just hold onto her, reassure himself that she was ok, but Daryl wasn't in command of his feelings and a lifetime of anger had hardwired his system.

"Kate!" he shouted, his voice echoing off the cement walls that rose around them. She stood and turned, happiness and relief written all over her face and for a brief second it was almost enough to cool him down. But like so many other times in his life, rage won over.

He barreled angrily towards her and he watched her face fall.

"You went on a run? Without me?!" He thundered. "Are you trying to get yourself killed? What were you thinkin'?"

He was standing over her, his face in her's and for a minute he felt so much like his father, but it was clear Kate wasn't afraid of him. He watched her eyes flash with anger.

"I can go if I want! I'm NOT going to be a prisoner behind these walls while you leave ALL. THE. TIME!" She was gritting her teeth and he realized he'd never seen her angry like this before.

He pointed his finger in her face, "You'll stay if I say you will!" he yelled, not believing for a second he

had the authority to force her, but hoping she did.

She actually laughed, an angry bark.

"You don't get to tell me what to do Daryl." She practically spat, shaking her head.

"Kate, are you ok?" An unfamiliar man's voice came from behind them. Daryl turned to see one of the new people and the animal inside him came alive at some other man acting as a protector to Kate and from him no less. He'd sooner die than hurt a hair on her head.

"David. I'm fine." She said with annoyance.

So this is David, Daryl thought. The same David that asked Kate to dance. The animal inside him roared.

"You don't look fine." David said, this asshole bravado in his voice.

"SHE'S FINE! NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE." Daryl snarled over his shoulder.

"I wasn't asking you." David replied calmly.

Daryl saw red. He stormed towards David and with one punch knocked him out cold.

He had heard Kate yell, "Daryl don't!" at the last second, but he couldn't have stopped if he had wanted to. He stood angrily over David and looked up to see Maggie, Michonne and a few faces he didn't have names for come around the building. He looked at Kate. She looked pissed, she shook her head at him and rolled her eyes. He still felt the rage coursing through him. He knew he had to cool down. He walked past Maggie, Michonne and the open mouthed strangers, grabbed his crossbow from the car and headed to the gate.

Daryl spent the rest of the afternoon hunting. He didn't catch anything, he was too angry to be quiet enough. He did kill four walkers and took out some of his aggression on them.

He'd lost control. He knew he had. It had happened many times throughout his life and even the group hadn't been spared his bouts of rage. The first time he met Rick he went after him with a knife and if it hadn't been for Shane's choke hold who knows what would have happened. There had been other occasions too, but he'd never turned his anger towards Kate and he felt terrible. He would have calmed down, but that prick David had to interfere. Like Daryl was some monster that Kate needed protecting from, when he had long ago devoted himself to keeping her safe. He was sorry he had yelled at Kate that way, but he would knock David's ass out again in a second.

He returned to the prison at dusk and he was glad to see it was Glenn at the gate.

"Dude, and the KO goes to Daryl Dixon."

"Ya, I'm a real dick." Daryl said flatly.

"No man, I get it. You won't get any shit from me."

Daryl nodded. "What about Kate? She ok?"

"I don't know, gonna have to figure that one out yourself."

Daryl headed up the slope.

Their cell was dark, but he could make out Kate's body on the bed, turned towards the wall. He slid in against her, his hand circling around her waist, his fingers finding the bare skin between her shirt and jeans. He buried his face in her neck, breathing in deeply. He started to kiss her shoulder and she pulled away from him.

"You don't get to do that Daryl." She said quietly without turning towards him.

He felt wounded and he let go of her like she was hot metal. He quickly scrambled out of the bed, grabbing his crossbow and heading towards the cell door.

"Where are you going?" She demanded, sitting up.

"Figure you want me to go." He was confused, he'd never had a relationship, he didn't know how reasonable adults handled conflict. His parents screamed, threw things, his Dad hit his Mom, he'd leave and not come back for days. He knew he didn't want that, but what he was supposed to do was a mystery to him.

"No, I don't want you to go." She sighed, flipped on their little light and sat at the edge of the bed. "But you can't just come in here thinking we can have sex and everything will be ok."

Daryl just stood there looking at her. Sex was the best way he knew to connect. When they were together like that he felt so close to her and all he wanted right now was to know everything was ok between them. She continued on.

"You were gone for days, like usual, and you come back and instead of being happy to see me, you start yelling at me like I'm a child. I get that you were worried about me or even that you were mad I went, but did you ever stop to think about what a difficult situation I had gone through? All I wanted was you to come home so I could feel safe again and instead you made me feel worse."

"Kate, if something had happened to you..." His voice broke and he trailed off. Tears threatening.

Her face softened. "I know." She stood and went to him, wrapping her arms around his middle and putting her head against his chest. He held her and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm sorry" He whispered hoarsely.

"I am too."


	23. Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

Daryl

Daryl hadn't been back from hunting long when Rick came knocking on the cell door to ask if they would mind taking guard duty that night. It was supposed to be Mark & Kelly, but for obvious reasons that wasn't happening. Daryl had his suspicions about why Rick was asking them to cover. Whether they were going to fight, make up or both, the privacy of the tower would be preferred to the open cell where every whisper and sigh seemed to echo off the concrete walls.

Now that so many people shared the responsibility of guard duty, they couldn't just leave their bedding up there like before. Daryl grabbed his crossbow and the bunk mattresses they'd kept and Kate gathered their blankets and a pillow in her arms and they made their way downstairs and out into the yard.

They found Tyreese up in the tower leaning over the railing, flirting with Karen who was smiling up at him. He saw them approaching, armfuls of bedding, and stood up.

"Are you two relieving me? I was starting to wonder if I'd be up here all night" He said with an easy laugh, he looked back down at Karen, "I'll be right down and I'll walk you back to your cell." He disappeared into the shack.

"Awww. Thats sweet." Kate cooed at Karen.

Karen grinned, "He's old fashioned. Its nice."

Tyreese walked out the door, grabbed Karen's hand and they said goodnight.

Up in the tower, Daryl tossed the mattresses down and while Kate spread the bedding out he headed outside to the railing. He lit a stale cigarette and looked over the dark prison yard.

Kate walked out and leaned against the rail next to him.

"Should we talk about it?"

" 'bout what?"

"Your run. My run. Our scene outside today. You knocking David out."

"'Told you I was sorry." He realized it sounded insincere like that and quickly looked at her and added, "I am you know."

He exhaled and watched the cloud of smoke drift off into the cold night air. He kind of thought they'd already talked about it as much as they needed to back in the cell. But he should've known better, Kate rarely missed a chance to talk something to death.

She sighed and dove in.

"I'm sorry I went on the run, not because I should stay here and never go out, but because of the way it turned out. If something happened to me, if it had been me instead of Mark..."

Daryl looked at her horrified. He didn't even like hearing her mention the possibility, but she kept on.

"You wouldn't have even known I'd gone and you would've come back to that and its not fair to send you off on runs and having you worry whether I'm back here safe behind the walls or out somewhere. So I won't go again unless you know about it. Ok?"

His lips formed a thin line, but he nodded. He wanted to tell her she shouldn't go at all, not without him, but he figured he'd cross that bridge when they got there.

"What are you going to do about David?" she asked.

"'Bout David?"

"Ya, I mean, are you going to apologize...or..."

"You think I should apologize?" He snarled.

"Well, no, I mean." She sighed again and closed her eyes. "I don't know..."

"That asshole deserved it Kate. And if he keeps sniffin' around you and gettin' into our business I'll knock him out again."

"I know. I get it. He can be really persistent and really annoying. I seriously almost slapped him across the face on our run today. I don't fault you for hitting him."

Daryl didn't know what David had done to make Kate mad, but he was pissed off just thinking he had upset her. He paced around a bit before returning to the rail and gripping it tightly, trying to keep his temper in check. He didn't want to take it out on her again.

"But instead of slapping him, I said some rude things and I feel awful about it. You know, we don't have to like everyone here Daryl, but we all have to live together. I just don't want it to be weird."

"I ain't apologizin'. Don't ask me to do that Kate."

"I won't. I didn't mean for it to sound like I wanted you to. I just didn't know what you planned to do."

Daryl crushed his cigarette out on the side of the guard shack and tossed it over the railing. He could feel the anger starting to boil, but then she drew up next to him, entwined her arm around his and pressed her cheek into his shoulder.

"How was your run with Michonne?"

He was thankful she was changing the subject, he took a couple deep breaths. He hadn't had a second to relax since they'd gotten back from the run and he had already been exhausted.

"Ok. We got a lot of shit, but no sign of the Governor. I'm pretty sure that trail is cold, but Michonne's mind is set."

"Did you search mostly stores or houses?"

"Both. Found a neighborhood of nice houses. Got a lot there."

He had a feeling she was more concerned with calming him down than the little details of the trip, but it was working and he went with it.

"Is that where you stayed?"

"The first night, ya. Second night we were further in the woods. Stayed in a hunting cabin. Didn't find much - a little food, some crossbow bolts."

Daryl suddenly remembered he'd brought something back for her. He dug into his pant's pockets until he pulled out a folded piece of red and white fabric. He pushed it into her hands. She was smiling before she even knew what it was and he watched her face as she unfolded a small California state flag. She looked up at him, her eyes shining brightly, her smile widening and he swore his heart skipped a beat.

"Daryl I love it. I really do." She wiped her eyes and gave a half laugh, half sob.

"Its just a flag. Found it on a cork board in some garage." He didn't know what to do with her tears, but she was still smiling so he kept on. " I don't know what many of the state flags look like, but I always remembered California had that bear. Thought it might remind you of home."

Kate wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest.

"It does. I love it. Thank you."

* * *

Daryl hefted the heavy box down the dark hall of the prison. Carol walked beside him, her flashlight beam bouncing in front of them. He had been headed inside from the tower when Carol asked if he would mind carrying the books to the library that he and Michonne had brought back from the run. She and Kate had cleaned the place up and everyone was happy to have it available, but a prison library doesn't exactly have a children's section so Carol had asked them to bring some back if they ever had a chance. The first house they stayed in on this last run looked as if it had a couple kids grade school age and Michonne had spent a lot of time filling a cardboard box she found in their garage with books from the shelves in their abandoned rooms.

Carol and Daryl reached the end of the corridor. Hanging above the door was a small, wooden sign with the word "Library" carved into it. No doubt something made by an inmate in the prison wood shop. Carol opened the door and Daryl headed in.

"Where you want these?" Daryl asked.

She pointed to one of the tables, "Right there is fine."

Daryl set the box down. "You need anything else?" he asked, wiping his hands on the sides of his black pants. "I'm headin' down to some meeting of Rick's."

"You too, huh? Know what its about?"

"No idea. You know, I ain't never been to a meetin' before the turn, now I gotta go all the time."

Carol laughed. "I know what you mean. Although I had the occasional PTA meeting. Kate going?"

"Nope. Rick didn't ask her to."

"You guys all made up? I hear you made quite the scene yesterday."

The question might have annoyed him coming from someone else, but he knew Carol wasn't trying to bust his balls.

"Ya. People should mind their own damn business, but we're good. I still feel like a jerk, but Kate ain't mad anymore."

"Don't be so hard on yourself Daryl, everyone fights. We all know you care about Kate."

"Not everyone." He huffed.

"Well, everyone that knows you two. And Kate knows, thats what counts. Since when do you care what anyone thinks anyway?"

"I don't, but she might."

"I wouldn't worry about that too much. That girl is crazy about you."

"She's crazy alright. Why else would she put up with me?"

"Daryl, you're a good man and she's lucky to have you."

He shrugged her comment off. Daryl didn't miss the trace of sorrow in her voice. It made him uneasy. He knew there was a time that she was looking to him for more. What exactly that was, he didn't know. Their friendship formed early on when he was barely capable of carrying on a decent conversation and she'd just lost an abusive husband and her daughter. She was the first one he felt really wanted him around. He guessed they'd formed a bond because they were the only two who's lives were shitty even before the turn. He cared a lot about Carol, but for whatever reason, it was never more than friendship.

"Anyway, we better head up to the meetin'." He said, eager to end the awkwardness he was feeling.

They walked back down the corridor towards the common room. Rick and Hershel were already there. Hershel sat at one of the metal tables, while Rick stood.

"Morning." Rick said as Carol took a seat next to Hershel and Daryl leaned against the wall.

"Who else we waitin' on?" Daryl asked.

"Glenn and Sasha."

"I'm here." Glenn said, walking in from the cell block and taking a seat. A few minutes later and Sasha came in breathless from outside.

"Sorry guys, I'm on gate duty today and I had to wait for someone to take my place."

Rick nodded and began.

"Thanks everyone for coming. Several months ago, when we had our problems with the Governor, I told some of you that all the decisions weren't up to just me anymore and that we'd vote. I meant that. Except our group is larger now and growing all the time. Hershel and I have been talking and he suggested we form a council - a small government of sorts. A group that can make rules and decisions for the prison. We made a list of who we thought should be on that council and here you all are. We wanted to ask you if you would agree to serve on it."

Daryl looked around at everyone. It made sense to him that those here should be on it, except him. There was no way anyone here could possibly think he should have anything to do with this. Didn't he knock a guy out yesterday?

"I ain't exactly the governmental type." Daryl protested.

Hershel responded quickly.

"No, but no one doubts how much you care about the prison and the people here. You've brought many of them in. You and Michonne have brought in most our supplies. Daryl, like it or not, you're one of the leaders here. We need you on this council."

Daryl just nodded. He didn't know if he agreed with most of what Hershel said, and he definitely wasn't comfortable with the leadership label, but he thought the world of Hershel and he'd do almost anything the man asked him to do.

Rick continued.

"Hershel has been teaching me some farming. We think with a little work and some supplies, we could have a real nice, sustainable source of food. With a little luck, maybe even some livestock. It'll be a good way for Carl to contribute too. So effective immediately, I'm pulling myself back on all runs. I'm also not planning on being a part of the council. I'd like to propose that Hershel lead it instead, but of course you can all vote on that."

"You won't be leading us at all?" Carol asked, both surprise and concern on her face.

Rick shook his head. "I think its time I take a step back. You are all more than capable. I need to spend some time with my kids. I'm worried I'm losing Carl to this world, this is my chance to bring him back. We'll announce the changes to the entire group, we just wanted to make sure you were all on board."

They all shook their heads or mumbled their agreements.

"Our first item of business is organizing a run." Hershel began. "We need some items to complete the shower project and some gardening supplies. It isn't a lot of stuff, but we might have to go further out to find them. Daryl, are you up for a longer trip? Maybe take Michonne?"

"I'll take Kate." He said quickly. He noticed the question flicker across Hershel's face.

"You sure about that?" Rick asked.

Daryl nodded, but didn't explain further. He knew the risks involved in taking Kate, but he didn't want to leave her here so soon after the whole thing with David. He'd worry about her too much and he had a feeling she'd be happier not being left behind for once.

"That's settled then." Hershel moved on. "We should decide how often and where we should meet."

"And we can vote on Hershel leading the council." Glenn piped in.

"All in favor of Hershel raise their hand." Sasha said and everyone but Hershel did.

"You don't get a vote Rick!" Hershel laughed.

Rick grinned."Ya, I know, I know. Just showing my support."

"Hershel it is." Glenn said. "Should we meet once a week? Every two weeks?"

"Maybe once a week at first and then adjust it as we find it necessary?" Carol suggested "We can meet in the library. Its quiet and there is space."

"That sounds good." Hershel agreed and after a couple other quick items he dismissed the meeting.

* * *

KATE

Kate looped the apron around her neck and grabbed a machete off its hook. She headed down the slope and opened the gate to the dog run, heading to a section of fence that was bowing under the weight of the walkers that were trying to claw their way inside.

Several people were already working the fence, sending their weapons through the chain links . As soon as one walker fell, another would take its place.

"Good morning Kate!" Karen said brightly as she walked up.

"Hey Karen, is it just me or is this getting worse out here?"

"Seems like it. No end in sight." She pushed a long piece of rebar through a rotten skull.

"I think I'm going to head down a ways, spreading out might help keep them off just one section of fence."

Karen waved a gloved hand at her and Kate walked down about 25 yards, running the machete along the fence. Several walkers turned at the clinking sound and followed. She stopped and started shoving the long knife into their skulls. Twenty minutes later and she was sweating from the effort and stopped to take off her jacket. She saw David heading her way, his eye swollen shut and dark purple.

She tossed her jacket on the ground behind her and turned back to the fence. David stopped a few feet away from her, gripping another piece of rebar in his hands.

"I'm sorry about your eye David." She said, wincing as she got a look at it close up.

"Eh. It looks worse than it feels." He jabbed the rebar through the fence. "I went to Rick. Not just because your boyfriend knocked me out, but because I was worried about you."

She sighed, rolling her eyes. This was getting old. "And?"

"And Rick told me I had nothing to worry about, that Daryl was a bit rough around the edges and obviously had a temper, but that he'd never hurt you. Rick said he loved you like you were his own sister and if he thought for a second there was anything to worry about, he would've interfered a long time ago. He said Daryl was a good man."

Kate smiled. "He's right you know."

"I know. I trust Rick. So even though I'm still kind of pissed off about the eye, I'm sorry to you for the things I said and I'll leave you guys alone."

"Thanks David. And I'm sorry too, for the thing I said about you being a guest here. That wasn't fair

or true. It's your home too."

"Home sweet home." He laughed and gestured to the gurgling walkers in front of them.

An hour later, Daryl and Kate sat on the table of the picnic bench outside. They both held bowls of noodles and pasta sauce. This was one of Kate's favorite prison meals, although she would like it even better if they had meatballs. Daryl had just told her about the council. He was clearly unsure of the whole idea of him being part of it, but she thought it made sense. She knew there was a part of him that would always feel like Merle's little brother and she imagined he would have let Daryl have it about doing such a thing.

"So Rick is stepping down completely? I'm shocked. I mean, it makes sense. Carl is so different. He isn't anything like the other kids his age around here. I thought it might get better after the whole Woodbury thing died down, but it hasn't."

Daryl nodded. "I'm not sure farming is goin' to help that any, but Rick's gotta try I guess."

"I wonder if they'll need any help? I think I might like to try it."

"Don't hurt to ask. I'm sure they'd like some help. Although I have a hard time seein' you as the farmin' type."

'Did they say anything about when the showers were going to be finished?"

"Need more supplies. For that and for farming. They asked me to go on another run. Further out this time."

Kate's heart sunk.

"Oh. Ok. When are you heading out? How many days?"

"Probably tomorrow. Maybe two nights, maybe more dependin' on what we find." Daryl shoveled in another mouthful of noodles.

She wished so badly he was staying home longer before going for so long. He had just gotten back.

"We'll be leaving pretty early in the morning, so we should probably turn in early."

"Who are you going with? Michonne?"

"Takin' you. If you want to go."

Kate grinned. He returned it.

"Seriously? Are you kidding? Who else is coming?"

"Just me and you."

"Really? Daryl I'm going to kill you if you're teasing me. Just the two of us, out together for two nights?"

"Calm down girl, we ain't goin' on no vacation. Its work and its dangerous."

She knew that and there was a part of her that was nervous, but she felt safe with Daryl. Mostly though she couldn't believe that he was actually taking her out that far and that they'd have some real time together. It was a first. She threw herself at him, knocking him back on the table and kissing his cheek.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Kate

Daryl hit the gas and the big pick-up roared through the prison gate past the ambling walkers and down the gravel road. Kate, who was looking forward to getting away for a couple days, looked happily at Daryl. He stared straight ahead, a scowl etched on his face. She didn't let that dampen her excitement, she was used to his surliness. She knew he was worried about keeping her safe outside. He probably was having second thoughts about the whole idea. But he couldn't seriously expect her to spend the rest of her life behind the fences, everyone had to get out every once in awhile.

Kate wasn't being flippant. She knew anytime they left it was a risk. She had been on the waiting end of that equation enough times to have imagined every possible danger. But they wandered for seven months before they found the prison and you don't do that without picking up some skills. She knew she wasn't Michonne, but she was hardly the green city girl she was when this whole ordeal began and paired with Daryl's expertise and successful track record, not to mention his motivation to keep her alive, she was confident that they wouldn't have too difficult of a time getting what they needed and getting back home.

"Man it's freezing this morning!" Kate wiggled her stiff fingers in front of the vents, willing the heater to kick in and warm the air. She was convinced Georgia had two seasons, really cold and really hot. She missed the mild California weather.

"Just so we're clear" Daryl interrupted her thoughts on the weather, pinning her down with his stare, "While we're out here, you do exactly as I say. Can't have you arguin' about not havin' to listen to me and gettin' us killed."

She almost wanted to laugh, or maybe even demand that he give her a little credit, but she knew it wouldn't go over well and if he was going to relax enough to make this enjoyable at all, she needed to let him get this part of it out of his system.

"Ok. I promise."

"Keep your knife and gun with you and be ready to run. Sooner or later, we always run."

He wasn't telling her anything she didn't know already, but she shook her head in agreement. That seemed to satisfy Daryl for the time being and they drove on in silence for a while before Daryl mentioned there were probably CDs in the glove box. She leaned forward and grabbed the black album out of the compartment, unzipping it and flipping through the musical taste of some stranger whose truck was now theirs. She pulled a bright yellow CD out of its plastic sleeve, "Oh awesome! Sticky Fingers!"

"Huh?" Daryl grunted, glancing briefly in her direction before his eyes turned back to the road.

"The album, Sticky Fingers. The Rolling Stones. Do you like them?" She asked Daryl as she pushed it into the player. She couldn't imagine anyone not liking the Stones.

"They're a'right." He mumbled as the opening riff to Brown Sugar wailed out of the speakers. Kate immediately started dancing around in her seat, slapping the beat out on the dashboard and doing her best Mick Jagger impersonation. Daryl laughed in spite of himself.

"You're something else, ya know it?" He said, shaking his head. The song played on and Kate sang to Daryl loudly, continuing to bounce around and smile triumphantly because she had made him smile.

By the time 'Wild Horses' drifted sorrowfully through the speakers his scowl had melted away, he had his hand resting on her leg and his face had taken on a more relaxed expression.

Kate looked out the window and let the melancholy tone of the song carry her mind off. They sped past kudzu covered woods, abandoned peach stands and schools with overgrown grass and broken windows. Being isolated in the prison, it was easier to accept their new life - but out here there were reminders everywhere of the life that used to be. It seemed impossible that just over a year ago they were all carrying on, blissfully ignorant of the fact that everything was about to fall apart and that this man she shared her life with now, was a stranger to her then.

It wasn't lost on her that they would have made an unlikely pair in the old world and she would amuse herself sometimes picturing what her family and friends would think of her squirrel-hunting, cigarette-smoking man. She still marveled that they ended up together at all - two people so seemingly different that it was hard to imagine a less extreme circumstance bringing them together.

She looked over at him now, he was squinting into the sun, his greasy hair hanging in his eyes and the ever present coating of dirt clinging to his skin. A wave of gratitude washed over her.

"Daryl, do you ever think about how lucky we are?"

"Darlin', you got a funny idea of lucky."

"Don't get me wrong, this world is a shitty place and we've both lost people and seen terrible things. But we're alive. We have a safe home and we have each other. That's a lot more than most have these days." She paused. "I don't know, I guess I'm just feeling thankful and thinking how much I love you."

He took his eyes off the road and looked at her with that burning intensity that always made her ache for him, but he didn't say anything back. There was a time Kate would have said she could never be with the 'strong, silent type'. The idea of having to guess at someone's feelings and never getting to have deep conversations about emotions and thoughts sounded like a form of torture to her. But she found with Daryl it didn't bother her so much. What he failed to say was usually evident in his expression and actions. She used to have a rule for herself, she would never say 'I love you' to a man unless he had said it to her first. But she had long ago told Daryl she loved him and had continued to since, even though he had never said it back. It didn't even bother her. She knew he loved her, knew it as sure as the dead walked the Earth.

They drove along for hours. A trip that would've only taken a few back before was stretching long into the day now that the main highways were largely unusable. Miles of abandoned cars and herds of walkers pushed them onto back roads and forced them to find alternate routes. Even then they'd have to sometimes backtrack and find yet another way. Daryl would either bring the truck to a stop to stare at the map, or curse and turn around for what seemed like the thousandth time. Kate would always grow quiet and try to give him some time to get them back on track, but most of their trip was filled with long conversations. Sometimes they would talk about the prison, how they were building a stable life for themselves there, or all the new people. Kate had gotten to know almost everyone and she filled Daryl in on their stories. Where they had come from, who they had lost and what they had done before the dead drove them to live in a prison.

He would ask her questions about her life back in California. What her mom was like, who her friends were, what she did to fill her time. She always liked sharing these things with him, feeling like it helped him get to know her better and it helped her keep those memories alive in more than just her mind. She asked him about his life before too, and although he'd always find some sort of answer to give her, she got the impression it cost him something to dredge up the memories and so she tried to let him take the lead and tell her what he was ready to share.

Sometimes Daryl would tell her about the Georgia he knew, pointing out a road that led to a river or creek that he had fished in before or telling a story about a bar that Merle had gotten them both kicked out of. The Merle stories were always funny and she liked that Daryl could still share them with a smile on his face.

When they finally reached the small industrial complex that housed the plumbing and piping distributor that was first on their list, Daryl asked her to stay put while he checked out their surroundings. She sat reluctantly in the truck, nervously scanning the area while Daryl headed across the cracked asphalt towards the back property. It was surrounded by a tall chain link fence and there were stacks of pipes in all sizes filling most of the yard. Daryl, crossbow drawn and ready, approached the fence and kicked it a few times. it didn't take long for two walkers to drag themselves growling to the gate. She watched as Daryl stabbed each in the skull, wiping the black blood on his pants and heading around the front of the building. She felt a little panicky when he was out of her sight, but he returned a minute later.

"Don't think we can get in from the back, gonna have to go through the front. Judgin' by the number of cars parked here, I expect we might run into a few more walkers inside. Stay close."

They approached the gray and white cement building, Kate held her knife tightly in her hand. The texture on the hilt rubbing against her sweaty palm. Her heart raced and her mouth was dry. Daryl knocked loudly at the front entrance and they waited. A solitary walker banged against the door, it's rotting hand leaving streaks across the glass. Daryl sent the butt of his crossbow through the pane and as the walker tried to struggle through the small opening, Daryl sent a bolt through its head. He used the crossbow again to knock out the rest of the glass and they made their way carefully inside. Daryl leaned down to pull the arrow out of the walker's skull and gestured towards the cashier's counter where another walker was pinned by something, but trying its best to get to them. Daryl approached it quickly, driving his knife through its empty eye socket. It fell with a crunching sound onto the register and slipped onto the floor.

They swept the entire building, including the warehouse at the back where two additional walkers were waiting and a small hallway where the doors to the bathroom and two empty offices were found. Kate was relieved that this spot wasn't too difficult to clear and that they had done so safely. She guessed there were advantages to driving to these out of the way spots. Once they were sure they were secure, Daryl made his way through the store and then the warehouse, stuffing a large duffel bag with various tools and parts from a list Hershel had given him. They had supposedly gotten most the equipment they needed to pump water into the prison back on the Decatur run, including all the pipes, but a few things were still needed and Daryl was happy that he found them here.

When they got back to the truck, Daryl tossed the heavy bag into the bed, "Next stop - the feed & seed." He announced, quickly kissing her and giving her ponytail a playful tug.

They drove for another hour before he pulled off next to a tan corrugated metal building. The windows had long ago been broken and even from the street you could see walkers meandering about the collapsed displays. The noise of the truck alone drawing their attention towards them.

"Are we going to try to go in there?" She asked, hoping with her whole heart he'd say no.

"Naw. Too risky. Plenty of feed and seeds in Georgia, no need to get our hearts set on this one. We'll find a yellow pages and hit a couple on the way back. For now we'll go find us a place to stay."

It was mid-afternoon when they found a house for the night in an out-of-the-way neighborhood. Daryl had parked far enough down the tree lined street that their truck wouldn't immediately tip off where they were staying, but it was close enough that they could easily get to it if they had to run. They were lucky to have found a house that didn't have people or walkers. Once Daryl was satisfied that the place was empty, he went about securing it as best he could with what he found in the garage and basement. He pushed one of the living room couches in front of the door and started nailing boards across the downstairs window. While Daryl did that, Kate started combing through the rooms upstairs for anything useful. Homes were always the surest bet for supplies. If the family had left early enough, and the house hadn't already been picked through by other survivors, then there was almost always food in the kitchen, medicine in the bathroom cabinets and other everyday items that they all used to take for granted, but were treasures now.

She found a couple bags in the master bedroom's walk-in closet and her practical side rejoiced as she went to work filling them. In the bathroom she found cold medicine, a half used bottle of antibiotics, some Neosporin, a big bottle of hydrogen peroxide and an unopened package of razors. She took some bedding from the linen closet (bedding was a high demand item in the prison) and pulled the shower curtain off its bar, knowing that someone could use it to give their cell a little more privacy.

She headed to the bedroom, looking through the closet for any useful clothing, pushing the dresses and work attire to the side and taking all the jeans, sweaters and sensible shirts she could fit into the first bag and filling up half of the second one. She walked across the room to the tall dresser in the corner and was about to pull open the top drawer when she caught sight of a framed photo sitting on top. She picked it up and saw a couple in their 30's posing happily on a beach in their bathing suits. Most likely a vacation, maybe even their honeymoon. Happier times. She suddenly felt guilty and wondered who these people were. What their stories had been and where they had ended up. She put the frame back with a sigh and started going through the drawers, stuffing socks, underwear and t-shirts into the bag until she barely could zip it. She lugged the bags to the top of the stairs and tossed them to the bottom. They fell with a thud that brought Daryl investigating.

"Find some good shit?" He asked around a mouthful of nails, a hammer in his hand.

"Yep." She started down the stairs. "I think I'm done up here. Do you need any help?"

"Got the front windows done, gonna start on the back. Why don't you check the kitchen, see what we got to eat."

The house was quickly losing the light as the afternoon turned to evening and with each window Daryl covered it got a little darker. Lucky for them, whoever decorated in here had really liked candles. She got Daryl's lighter and went around to each one until the whole downstairs was bathed in flickering, yellow light.

This track of homes was fairly new and the kitchen was beautiful. There were dark cabinets, granite countertops and new stainless steel appliances. Like the rest of the house, everything in here was covered in a thick layer of dust. She found two coffee cups and a single spoon left in the sink and pictured a morning long ago where the people in the photo had a cup of coffee together before heading off to work, never suspecting the world was about to end. On the counter there was a plastic bag of mouldy bread and a bowl that she guessed had at one point held fruit, although the black, shriveled shapes had even been abandoned by flies. She skipped the fridge, knowing from experience that opening a sealed box of rotting food was a bad idea, and went straight to the pantry. She grabbed a box of granola bars, a couple cans of fruit, a jar of peanuts and two tins of chicken. She went through several drawers before she finally found the can opener and a fork for each of them (although she had her doubts Daryl would use his, his fingers being his preferred utensil) and laid them all out on the island. She found the grocery bags under the sink and went to work filling them with the rest of the items in the pantry that they could prepare back at the prison. When she was done she found Daryl in the basement and let him know dinner was ready.

After they ate, Daryl said he was going to check that everything was secure one more time before the sun completely disappeared. Kate padded into the living room, enjoying the plush carpet in socked feet. She found some fuzzy white ones with pink and gray stripes in a drawer upstairs and traded her heavy black boots for them. She stopped at a bookshelf in the living room to see if there was anything interesting to read when she happened upon a wedding album. It was black leather and "Christine and Doug, June 5, 1999" was stamped in silver on the cover. She opened it and saw the same faces from the photo upstairs smiling back at her. She sat down on the long blue couch and flipped through the wedding memories of strangers: the beaming bride being escorted down the aisle by her father, the obligatory shot of the wedding party creepily watching the couple kiss, and the bride and groom force feeding each other cake. They looked so happy in all the photos and now strangers were eating their food and wearing their socks. Maybe Doug and Christine were still ok. So many of the houses they had searched or stayed in before they found the prison had walkers in them, but this house was empty. Maybe they had gotten to someplace safe. Maybe.

Daryl walked into the room. "Everythin' looks good. No sign of nothin', livin' or dead that I can see."

He plopped down next to her on the couch, kicking off his boots and putting his feet up on the coffee table. "Whatcha got there?" he asked.

"Their wedding album. Doug and Christine's." She shut it and put it on the table next to his feet.

"Doug and Christine?" He asked, the smile he reserved for when he thought she was being weird lighting up his face. "They friends of yours?" He teased.

She took a playful swat at him and he grabbed her wrist. She laughed and tried with her other hand, which he captured just as easily.

"Got any moves left, girl?"

Kate smiled at him wickedly before slipping her leg over him and settling onto his lap.

"Just one." She said quietly. He swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. She leaned down and kissed him slowly. He let her hands go and moved his to her hips, digging his thumbs into the bones. She pulled away from him and pushed the hair out of his eyes, before taking his face in her hands and kissing him again. He tasted like sweat and cigarettes and his stubble scratched at her hands. She unbuttoned her flannel, watching his face the entire time as he looked at her. She pulled it off and tossed it aside. She could feel him hard beneath her and she moved slowly over him. He reached up with one hand, wrapping it around the back of her neck and pulling her face to his, eagerly kissing her mouth. His other hand wandered to her breasts, tugging the cups of her bra down.

Her hands worked the buttons of his shirt and he leaned forward as she pushed it and his leather vest off his shoulders at the same time. He sat up to shake them off his arms, his bare chest tightening with the task. She ran her hands down his sinewy arms and felt them harden as he reached behind her to undo her bra clasp. She rose up on her knees and he undid her jeans, pushing them off her hips. She tried to untangle her legs from her pants without leaving his lap, but gave up, laughing at her clumsiness and standing to kick them off. He took the opportunity to pull his pants off and grabbed a condom out of his pocket. He leaned back on the couch.

"Take your hair down."

She reached up and pulled the elastic band that held her ponytail together out and shook her hair out a little before pushing off her underwear and climbing back onto the couch. She got back in his lap and slowly lowered herself onto him. They both exhaled, finding each other's mouths and slowly starting to move together. He grabbed her hips, using them to direct her movements and set the pace. She let herself get lost in the moment, knowing that for once she didn't have to worry about someone walking into their cell or hearing their muffled sighs. No one could throw the tower door open or call up to them either. It was just the two of them, completely alone. It didn't take long before she felt the energy building up, her breath quickening. She grasped onto his arms, her movements more frenzied, before the waves crashed down on her. She slowed down and Daryl, out of frustration at the change in pace, wrapped an arm around her waist, and turned her onto the couch in one movement. He moved over her powerfully, until he tensed, his body shuddering and a groan escaped his throat. He fell against her, spent and sweaty.

* * *

Daryl

They laid tangled together for while, he had pulled a blanket off the back of the couch and covered them up. She was curled into his side, her leg over his body and her hand absentmindedly running through the hair on his chest. He knew they should probably get up and get dressed, the last thing he wanted to be when fighting off walkers (or people) was naked, but he couldn't bring himself to leave her arms just yet. There was something about being with her like this that eased his mind, caused the noise that was always there to fade into the background.

Being here alone with her felt surreal. He wasn't used to having her all to himself and definitely not in such a domestic setting. He felt like they were playing house. If it was possible to feel content and claustrophobic at the same time, then he did. Daryl didn't belong in a place like this, but she looked right at home. Something about that bothered him, but he couldn't say exactly what.

His eye caught the wedding album she had left on the table. He reached over and flipped the cover open. There was a picture of a pretty girl in a ridiculously poofy dress and a man standing next to her smiling in a tuxedo. He found himself wondering again if that was what Kate had always wanted - a wedding, marriage, a house, a family. All things he wouldn't have been able to give her in the old world.

"Is this what you want? Wanted?"

"What? A wedding? I guess I did before. Kind of weird the things I used to think were important."

"You don't anymore?"

"No. I mean, not the wedding part. Not the dress, tuxedo and cake. It seems kind of wasteful and distracting. That's not really what promising your life to someone should be about, you know? The promise, that's what's important to me still."

Daryl didn't say anything, but he wanted to tell her that he did know because he had promised his life to her a long time ago. Whatever this was that they had been doing these last several months, was what he wanted to keep doing for the rest of their lives. He loved her more than he ever thought was possible and he wanted to tell her that too, but for some reason he couldn't get the words out of his mouth. She deserved to hear it though and he was frustrated with himself again that he might not be loving her the way she should be.

"I always wanted kids too. Had names picked out and everything." She said, an unmistakable sadness creeping into her voice. "But bringing babies into this world sounds like the single scariest thing I can think of. I just don't think I could do it."

Hearing her say that came as a relief, although he was surprised that he felt a little sad about it too. The thought of kids had always seemed like too much responsibility, but now, it was a whole new level of worry.

"Ya. I don't envy Rick."

"What about you Daryl? Did you ever want to get married and have a family?"

He should have known that sooner or later this conversation would shift back to him and he immediately felt antsy.

"Naw. Never thought on it really" He said, pulling away from her and sitting up on the couch. " I was barely taking care of myself."

She sat up too, pressing her chest against his bare back. His muscles tensed suddenly as her skin came in contact with the scars that crisscrossed across his back, but he didn't pull away. She'd seen them many times before, she'd run her hands over the twisted skin, and even though he waited for the questions, the pity, she never asked. She just accepted them as part of him. As if sensing where his thoughts had gone, she raised her finger to the puckered skin and traced one of the scars from his right shoulder blade to the middle of his back, before dipping her head down and kissing it.

"My old man. When he drank he would..." He motioned weakly to his back and trailed off. "Anyway, Dixons ain't exactly cut out for family life anyway."

He reached down and grabbed his tattered black pants from the floor.

"You aren't like him." She said and kissed his shoulder. "It wouldn't be like that, if you were a father, I know it wouldn't."

He looked back at her and snuffed, but he knew she really believed that and that meant something to him.

"Better get dressed. Don't want to be fighting off walkers in our birthday suits."

* * *

The sunlight streaming through the boards on the window shone brightly in his eyes. He threw his forearm over his face and groaned. He heard Kate moving around in the kitchen and wondered how long she had let him sleep. They had a long drive in front of them and they still needed to stop at the feed store.

Last night he had taken first watch. Kate thought she wanted to sleep in the big, comfortable bed upstairs, but hardly any time had passed before she was back downstairs and curled up on the couch. She said she didn't like being that far away from him and he was relieved because he felt the same way. The night had passed uneventfully and when he woke her so he could sleep for awhile he fell asleep easily.

He sat up slowly just as Kate came around the corner. She was wearing a new shirt, undoubtedly something she had found upstairs. It was bright blue and made her matching eyes look like jewels.

She smiled brightly at him, "Good Morning." She crossed the room to kiss him. "How'd you sleep?"

He suddenly didn't care how much they had to do today, he wanted her. He pulled her down to the couch, letting his intentions be known.

Half an hour later, both of them dressed again and ready to go, Daryl pushed the couch away from the front door. He left Kate in the house, all their bags ready to go and at the front step, and he headed down the quiet street to get their truck. He drove it right up the driveway and grabbed the bags, adding them to the bag of plumbing equipment he had put back in the bed of the truck.

Kate climbed into the cab, snapping her seatbelt on and they were on their way, turning out of the neighborhood and speeding down the main road. He'd mapped out the location of two feed stores that they could hit on the way back and the first one was probably two hours out. With a little luck it would be an easy run and they'd be back at the prison well before dark.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

 **\- KATE -**

The flag that flew over Buck Jackson's Feed & Supply was in pristine condition. Despite the death and destruction that marched on below, it continued to wave in the wind oblivious. Its red, white and blue somehow still bright. It was hung there, no doubt, as a symbol of a once strong and proud nation. Kate eyed it resentfully as Daryl parked the truck in front of the small store. She couldn't help but feel bitterness towards a government that had failed so utterly in protecting its citizens. The store it hung above was much smaller than the big name farming suppliers that they had passed on their journey back to the prison. It was nestled up against the woods on the outskirts of a small town, a white clapboard building with a roof of red painted shingles - although the paint had long ago started to peel, exposing the warped and rotting wood underneath. There were two large windows on either side of a set of old hinged doors that looked like they'd been there for a hundred years.

Kate's boots hit the ground and she stretched her arms towards the sky. She double checked that her knife and gun were secure and grabbed her pack from the floorboard. Daryl was already knocking on the door of the shop loudly and she crossed the few feet from the truck to where he stood. She heard a familiar gurgling growl in the distance and turned to see a female walker in a faded pink dress dragging herself towards them from about 25 yards away. She wore only one shoe and her bare foot was almost devoid of skin. Daryl thrust his shoulder into the door and the old wood gave way easily. They both slipped inside long before the walker could get near them.

"We'll have to deal with her on our way out." Daryl said as he shut the doors behind them. They swept the store, finding it empty of humans, alive, dead or otherwise, and went to work on Hershel's list. Seeds, fertilizer, pesticides and some gardening tools were all part of a growing pile they placed by the door.

"I think that's all of it." Kate said, doing a quick inventory and rechecking the list.

"A'right. Let's see where our friend is and then get loaded up." Daryl strode over to the door, glancing out the window, unsnapping his sheath. Holding his knife in his hand, he slowly stepped outside. He immediately burst back in, "Holy shit!" He barked, putting his back against the door. Her eyes darted towards the window on the left and she saw a walker pass.

"There's a lot of them." He whispered. "Stay down."

Kate squatted and they waited in silence, hoping they hadn't been noticed and the herd would pass without incident. The gurgling hiss grew louder and the walkers began to pile up against the windows and doors, dimming the light in the store.

"We need to try and block the door." Daryl whispered.

Kate looked around, but the only thing she could find were the big bags of fertilizer. She started lugging them one at a time towards Daryl and he stacked them in front. The wood creaked and bowed and a decaying arm shot through a pane in the window.

"This ain't gonna hold." Daryl grimaced as he pushed against the strength of a dozen walkers fighting to gain entrance.

"I'll check the back, see if it's clear." She said as she sprinted to the opposite end of the store where there was a single door just behind the register. It had a narrow window that allowed her to see only so much, but there didn't seem to be a walker in sight. Only the woods. She looked back at Daryl.

"It's clear!" She shouted.

"A'right. You go, I'll hold 'em off so you can get a head start. Be careful, look before ya run out. I'll be right behind ya. Don't stop until I say."

Kate nodded. Adrenaline was coursing through her body in such high amounts that she couldn't even feel the fear she knew had to be there. She pulled her knife and held it tightly in her hand and opened the back door slowly. There were only trees. She darted outside, the sounds of breaking glass sounding behind her. She ran into the woods, praying silently that Daryl was close behind.

Her boots pounded across the forest floor, kicking up the fallen leaves and darting between the trees. When she first felt the yank on her pack, she thought it was Daryl and somehow in that split second she had time to wonder how he had caught up so quickly. But as her forward momentum was halted and her feet left the ground, she knew she was in trouble. She fell hard on her back in a sea of autumn leaves and the walker was on her immediately, snarling and gnashing its putrid teeth inches from her face. Strength she didn't know she possessed kept it at bay, but just barely. Her knife had lodged deep in the thing's chest as it fell on top of her, the hilt digging painfully into Kate's ribs as the monster tried desperately to tear into her.

She managed to bring a knee up between her and it, giving herself a little leverage and with as much force as she could muster she pushed it off of her. She scrambled a few feet and went for her gun, the walker right on her. She felt the cool metal in her hand, but as she pulled it from its holster the toe of her boot lodged under a thick tree root and she went down hard. As she felt her body hit the ground again, her gun went flying from her hand. The walker fell on top of her heavily and although she realized she had little chance of escaping, the bite never came. Instead the weight was suddenly removed and Daryl was falling to his knees at her side, terror on his face.

"I'm ok! I'm ok!" She shouted before he could even ask the question. He helped her to her feet, looking over his shoulder at walkers streaming from around the front of the feed store. He bent down and pulled his arrow from the back of the walker's skull and she realized that was what had saved her.

He spotted her knife protruding from its chest and with some effort freed it and handed it to her.

"We gotta move Kate."

"My gun. It went flying." She said looking frantically around the forest floor.

"We ain't got time, leave it." He demanded and they tore off into the woods, the herd close behind.

She wasn't sure how long they ran for. It could have been ten minutes, it could've been an hour. Her lungs were on fire and the stabbing stitch in her side was even worse. Wrestling with a walker hadn't left her unscathed either, but that pain was secondary to the effort it was taking to simply breath.

Finally Daryl figured they had put enough distance between them to at least stop and catch their breath. She leaned against a large tree, the rough bark scratching at her skin, and concentrated on breathing. Her head was hammering and her ribs throbbed.

"Are ya hurt?" Daryl asked, concern flooding his eyes as he reached his hand out to brush the dead leaves and twigs out of her hair.

"I'll be ok. Sore is all." She raised her shirt to examine her ribs, revealing an angry purple bruise from where the handle of the knife had dug into her.

Daryl laid his hand softly against it and they both winced.

"You ok to keep going? We should at least walk."

She shook her head and they marched on, deeper into the trees, further from their truck.

"Daryl, what's the plan?"

He stopped, looking back in the direction they came from, squinting into the sun.

"Try and find a place for the night. See if we can circle back in the morning. Maybe they cleared out, get the truck and get the supplies back home."

"You think you can find our way back to the truck?"

He laughed. "Course I can. Damn girl, you've got the worse sense of direction I've ever seen."

She was about to respond when she heard the snapping of a twig and Daryl raised his crossbow quickly, searching the trees.

The voice of a stranger broke the silence, "What's this I hear about a truck full of supplies?" and a group of men approached them, guns drawn. Kate saw the menacing smile on the man's face and she was filled with dread.

* * *

 **\- DARYL -**

He counted them quickly, seven, seven versus their two. They moved to surround them. His crossbow was aimed at the first one. The one who asked about their truck, but he knew it was a lost cause. He could easily kill the man, but then he and Kate would be dead. Seven men. Fuck, how could he be so stupid. How had he not heard them.

He could hear Kate's breathing behind him, it was coming fast and uneven. She was scared and that made him angry.

"How's about you lower your weapon, friend?" The man said calmly. He was a big guy with greasy gray hair and a pot belly. He wore a black shirt embroidered with skulls and roses and looked like he'd be at home sidling up to some bar at a biker joint.

"I ain't your friend." Daryl growled.

"Oh come on now, we haven't even gotten to know each other yet. I have a feelin' you and I have a lot in common."

The man continued to smile, a smile that never reached his eyes. They had a sadistic glint and it was because of that that Daryl lowered his bow. If it was just him, maybe he'd refuse and go down fighting, but he had Kate to worry about.

"Now that's better. Let's get back to this truck. You said you had supplies? My boys and I are real hungry. Could use some supplies."

"Got overrun. Can't get to it." Daryl replied.

"Well now, we could wait it out, go back tomorrow. I heard you say it yourself."

Daryl stared hard at the man. His mind was racing, trying to get a step ahead and figure out what answers he could give to keep them both, or at least Kate, alive. He had known men like this and they were bad enough before there wasn't a law keeping them in check. He heard Kate whimper and turned to see one of the men behind her, his face pressed into her neck, inhaling deeply. Daryl turned without thought and pointed the crossbow at him.

"Goddammit Len! I claimed first go, get the fuck away from her!" Another one of the men bellowed.

Len backed off, but not without giving Daryl a leering smile. Kate looked at Daryl, begging him with her eyes to let it slide. He lowered his weapon. Right now he wanted nothing more than to rip that man apart, but if he didn't calm down any small chance they had to survive this encounter would be lost. He turned back to the first man, since he did all the talking Daryl assumed he was the one in charge.

"See it's simple, you lead us to your truck and we let you go. Everybody wins."

"And if I don't?" Daryl spat.

"Well that's just stupid. See you'd be no use to us then. We'd kill you right now and have this sweet thing to ourselves."

Another man spoke up, "Why ain't we doin' that anyway, Joe?"

"Well now Billy, I'm glad you asked that question, you see, this man here, um, what'd you say your name was?"

"I didn't." Daryl said.

Joe gave him a chastising look. Daryl knew he needed to play along if they were going to have a chance.

"Daryl."

"Daryl." Joe smiled that ruthless smile again. "Daryl here has something we want, by the sound of it, this pretty thing don't know her head from her ass. So Daryl here, he's gotta lead the way."

"What about the girl, Joe? Can we have some fun?" This time it was the man that had been in Kate's face, what had they called him? Len?

"Well boys, you know the rules. Which one of you claimed her first?" Joe asked.

"I did." Said a man with a black bandana wrapped around his forehead.

"Well then, Tony here says he claimed her first, so…"

"She's mine!" Daryl snarled.

Joe laughed. It was an unsettling howl that made Daryl wince.

"Now Daryl, I know you don't know the way we work, being that you just met us and all, but we have rules. One of these rules is if you see somethin' you want, you gotta claim it. Its real simple. Tony here says he claimed the girl and you ain't in a real good position to be tellin' us how it is."

Tony moved towards Kate, a lecherous look on his face. He grabbed her arm roughly and pulled her towards his body. Kate closed her eyes. Tony reached down and grabbed her knife, pulling it from the

sheath.

"You won't be needin' this, princess. I'll make sure nothin' gets you. 'Cept me."

Daryl moved forward, pointing the bow yet again. Joe pointed a gun at his head.

"Daryl, this is gettin' old real fast. Don't make me blow your brains all over her. Now put down the bow."

"Get him off her. I'll take you to the damn truck." Daryl snarled.

"Tony, let go of the girl."

Tony started to protest.

"Tony, our friend Daryl here has agreed to take us to his supplies. Least we can do is leave our hands off his woman for the time bein'. No need for things to get ugly so quickly. 'sides, there'll be plenty of time for that later and if he pulls any funny business or if the truck turns out to not be worth our time, he'll wish we'd shot them both dead right here. Now, Daryl, put your fucking bow on the ground, your knife too."

A war was waging inside of Daryl. He'd rather die right here than give in to the commands of these assholes, escort them to his supplies while enduring God only knows what sort of treatment, only to be likely killed after they got what they wanted from him. He didn't think for a second they'd let him or Kate go. He figured it would be a bullet for him and endless torture for her while she wished she'd died. The way he saw it, if these men weren't being lead by Joe, he would've been dead already. That wasn't to say Joe was merciful, in fact, Daryl got the impression he was the most brutal of them all. The kind of man that liked hurting people, watching them suffer. That found people worthwhile only as long as he could use them. The type that would give someone the idea that if they followed orders, they could earn their freedom and get pleasure from the fact that he knew all along that wasn't true.

Daryl knew if they ever got home it wouldn't be because Joe let them. But if he could convince them that he believed Joe and was leading them to the truck, then maybe he'd have bought them enough time to make a move. It wasn't likely, but it was their only chance and if not they were doomed.

So Daryl leaned down and put his crossbow and knife in the soft dirt in front of him.

Joe jerked his head to one of his men and the plump one with the balding head scrambled to collect the weapons.

For the next few hours they wandered the woods. Daryl never really found any purpose in it, maybe this was just what they did. Drifted aimlessly until they found a place to crash, food to eat or people to torment. He thought about Merle and how if things had gone differently, they might've found themselves in similar company.

They walked along, nothing restraining either him or Kate, knowing if they tried anything there'd be seven men down on them. Tony, the one who "claimed" Kate, stuck close to her side, like he was guarding a piece of property.

Daryl spent most the time in silence, trying to get the measure of each man. Figure their group's strengths and weaknesses. Sometimes Joe would walk alongside Daryl. He liked to hear himself talk. He thought he had this new world all figured out and took every opportunity to tell them all how it was. The other men all seemed to unquestioningly follow his lead and his rules.

Of the other six men, only two stood out to Daryl. One was the fat, balding man, called Dan, who now carried his crossbow. He was sniveling and beady eyed. He seemed to be the outsider even in this group of outsiders. He was just a little bit off. Daryl couldn't exactly put his finger on it. Daryl decided he was the weakest and hoped to exploit that if the opportunity presented itself.

Then there was Len, that asshole that was all over Kate. Daryl hoped, live or die, he would get a chance to kill that son of a bitch. They all deserved it as far as he was concerned, but there was something about that guy that rubbed Daryl the wrong way. Like Joe, he seemed to be extra twisted, but without the pretense of keeping things civil.

"So tell me Daryl, this bitch you got here, is she a fighter? Mmmm...I bet she is. I like 'em when they fight back. We found a girl while back and she just cried the whole times we's havin' our fun. Ain't no challenge in that. Yep, I'm lookin' forward to seein' how hard she'll fight."

Since they'd been walking, Lew had done his best to get under Daryl's skin as much as possible. Daryl didn't know if it was to provoke him into doing something stupid and getting himself killed, or if it was just plain enjoyable to him, but Daryl's hatred grew.

As the light slipped slowly away, Joe ordered the men to stop and make camp. There was no fire, no food. They just constructed a crude alarm system by wrapping some cans hung on twine around the trees and spreading out their ratty bed rolls. Kate sat on the forest floor in a pile of damp, decaying leaves and wrapped her arms around her knees. She looked like she was trying to make herself disappear. Daryl remained standing, pacing protectively behind her, although everyone knew there was little he could do to keep her from them if they decided that's the way it would go.

Joe approached Kate.

"Now darlin', you look about as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockin' chairs."

She eyed him warily.

"I guess I can understand why, but no harm will come to you tonight, so long as Daryl here can behave himself." Joe shot Daryl a look to make sure he understood his meaning. "We're all real tired and I'm hopin' we can get some shut eye. We don't got anything to tie you up with and so we've got to trust you'll not cause any problems. We'll have two men on watch all night, so you can sleep without worryin' about the dead."

As it turned out, it was Dan and Len who were assigned first watch and the two men perched on a great, gray boulder just the other side of the line of cans. One by one the other men laid themselves down. Daryl settled on his side in the leaves and encouraged Kate to do the same.

"Don't go to sleep." He whispered.

"I couldn't if I wanted to." She whispered back.

He laid there quietly, listening to the sounds of night and for signs of sleep. When Daryl had first learned to hunt he was just a kid, and the hardest thing about it was the silent, still wait. They'd sit for hours, not a word between him, his dad and Merle, just the sound of the forest and the swish of whatever his dad was sipping on. He hated it, but he hated his father's wrath more. Eventually it became second nature, going quiet and tuning his senses to his surroundings. He did it now, sequestering the rustle of the leaves, the voices of Lew and Dan, and the insects that echoed through the woods, so that he could concentrate on the other men. Finally he heard the consistent, deep breath of sleep and the loud snores that Daryl was amazed hadn't caused walkers to kill them long ago. He reached down and untied his shoelaces, loosening them from the holes they crisscrossed through and pulling them out. He tied the two pieces together tightly.

"Kate." He whispered as loud as he dared, watching the sleeping lumps on the ground for any sign of waking. She had been turned the other way, facing the men, afraid to turn her back to them. He saw her turn her head slightly towards him. "Get up quietly and tell 'em you gotta pee. One of 'em will take ya out there, stall as much as possible and I'll meet ya there."

Daryl prayed she'd go without question, that she'd move quiet enough to keep the others asleep and that she'd be disarming enough as to not raise the suspicions of Len and Dan. A minute or two passed and he began to worry she hadn't heard him, but finally he watched her pull herself up off the ground. Sticks and dead leaves clinging to her jeans and that blue shirt - that fucking shirt he'd peeled off of her in that house just this morning. It seemed so long ago now.

He closed his eyes just enough to give the appearance of sleep and watched her through his eyelashes as she moved quietly through the dark camp towards the boulder. An almost full moon gave off the only light and Daryl watched as she stopped short of the cans and started to speak. He could barely make out the sound of her voice, although he couldn't tell what she said. He watched Len slide off the boulder, an obscene smile spread across his face. Fucking Len. He knew it would be him volunteering to lead her into the woods and away from him, Joe and Tony. Daryl knew once Len lead her away, he'd have to move fast if he was going to prevent him from doing the unspeakable. Kate ducked carefully under the line of cans and made her way towards the dark woods, Len gave one glance over his shoulder towards his sleeping companions before sneering and following her, his compound bow on his back.

Daryl counted to ten before moving to his knees and then his feet. He crouched down and made his way to the line, slowly slipping through silently. He approached the unsuspecting man like he did any animal he was hunting, with stealth and speed. He wrapped the shoelaces several times around the palm of each hand and crept behind Dan. In one movement he threw the laces over the man's head and around his neck, dragging him off the rock. Dan never had a chance to make a sound as he found himself being yanked by his neck onto the ground. Daryl pulled the lace tighter. Dan's hands went to his throat, digging at the laces, but they were buried deep in his reddening flesh. His legs kicked uselessly against the rock. The leaves around him crunched as he struggled, but for the most part it was a soundless death. When Daryl felt his body go limp, he scrambled out from under him and grabbed his crossbow which was leaning against the boulder. He ran into the woods in the direction he saw Kate disappear.

He found them about 50 yards away, struggling on the ground. Len had Kate pinned, but to her credit she was putting up quite the fight. He could hear Len laughing, "Come on bitch, you know you want it." and he was tearing at the waist of her pants. She clawed at his face and he reached back and punched her.

'Fucking bitch!"

Daryl was moving across the ground as fast as he could go, but it felt like slow motion. He threw his bow to the ground, grabbing at Len's sweatshirt with both hands and throwing him off Kate. Len tried to scramble to his feet, but Daryl was on him, pummeling his face with his fist until it was unrecognizable and his body had long grown still. Daryl's rage continued to pour out, unbridled, until he felt Kate tugging on his vest.

"Daryl. Daryl! It's done." Kate was crying, the tears streaming down her face, where a violet colored bruise was already blooming over her eye and cheek. Daryl turned and looked at her, his face contorted with anger, his hands bloodied and bruised and a frenetic energy trembling out of him.

"Daryl, it's done, he's dead." She repeated in a quiet voice.

Before he fully had a chance to come back to his senses, they heard the voices in the distance. Her panic filled eyes met his. He grabbed his crossbow and by the time he had it cocked and loaded one of the men was tearing through the trees.

"Billy! Over here." He shouted before the bolt tore through his head, dropping him dead on dirt. Daryl heard Billy crashing through the forest and he knew there wouldn't be anytime to load up again.

"RUN!" He shouted at Kate, hoping he could hold Billy off long enough for Kate to get a head start.

Maybe in the dark they'd lose her trail and she could get away.

Billy came bursting out from between two trees, gun in hand. He saw the bodies on the ground and aimed his gun at Daryl. A shot rang out and Daryl jumped, but it was Billy who crumpled to the ground, the shoulder of his jacket quickly going red.

"Motherfucker!" He yelled and Kate moved closer and shot him again.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

\- KATE -

Kate watched the dark red blood balloon over the man's chest. As dark as it was, it still wasn't the black, sludgy blood of a walker. There was no doubt that the life she just took was human, even if it was the worst kind of the species. His eyes remained open and fixed in her direction, but it was the blood she couldn't stop looking at. The last sign of being escaping from the doomed ship.

The immediate thought she had in the seconds after taking a life for the first time was of her mother. It was a bizarre thought: a girl should be able to share the fact that she had just killed a man with her mom. It was like her soul was a big gear and she felt the wheel move and the teeth push her further from where she started. The less her mother knew, the less of the person she used to be existed.

She'd heard him running through the woods after his friend had called his name and heard the panic in Daryl's voice as he yelled for her to run. But she didn't, she couldn't let Daryl sacrifice himself for her. Instead, without giving it a thought, she had bent down and grabbed the gun that had come to rest in the dirt and leaves a few feet in front of her after Daryl had sent an arrow through its owner's brain. Whether it was loaded, whether she could hit her target (and what would've happened if she couldn't), whether it would bring down a thousand walkers on them, none of these thoughts came close to entering her mind. She saw Billy point his gun at Daryl, dismissing her presence and not even seeing the gun at her side, she raised it, squeezing the trigger, like she had so many times at target practice since this whole thing started. Like she had when she was blindly trying to hit the Governor or his men the first time they attacked the prison. Except this time she could see her target's face and the shock and pain that contorted it when her first bullet tore into his shoulder. Panic seized her when she realized he wasn't dead and that she would be if she didn't finish the job. She strode towards him, determined to do it, and with his eyes looking right at her, she shot him again, hitting him in the chest. Both times she'd been aiming for his head.

"Kate! Kate!" Daryl's voice made its way through her dark reverie. She looked up at him, like she had forgotten he was there at all. "We gotta go! Move!"

He was collecting the rifle that had dropped when the bullet had hit Billy's shoulder. She felt the weight of the gun in her hand and realized it was still fixed on the body.

"KATE!" Daryl said again, forcefully. She picked up her feet and moved in his direction. Satisfied, he turned and rushed into the trees. They hadn't gone very far, maybe 100 feet or so, when Daryl stopped behind a thicket of bushes and motioned for her to get down.

"No sense in us runnin', they'd hear us crashin' through a mile away." He explained.

She knew it was true, she could already hear Joe and his remaining men tearing through the forest, presumably towards wherever they thought they'd heard the shots from.

"Gotta get underneath there." Daryl whispered, checking the rifle's ammo.

Kate dropped down on her belly, the damp soil spongy and cold through her shirt. Her breath hissed as her sore ribs pressed into the rocky ground. She dragged herself as best as she could into the thick brambles as they tore and scratched into her skin. Daryl followed behind her, the branches snapping and rustling as they gave into his body. He crawled up next to her, pulling himself by his elbows as far to the edge of the bush as he could without risking notice and readied the rifle.

Kate was trembling. It wasn't because of the cold autumn night, although if they weren't literally fearing for their lives she might have noticed how chilly it was in the same way she might have worried about what snakes or spiders she was sharing space with right now. And the shaking wasn't just from fear, although she was plenty afraid. Her body was reacting to it all: the many hours spent in the company of men wanting to do them harm, the sudden, violent escape and the resulting situation. They could be minutes away from a painful and torturous death. There was no chance that Joe would show mercy or be interested in their truck as a bargaining chip. It would go from something he had found amusing, a sadistic game, to something much more personal. She closed her hand around the gun tighter, prepared to use it again. If her mother could only see her now.

The night sky suddenly echoed with profanities and they knew Joe and his men had found the bodies.

"When I get my hands on that cocksucker he's gonna beg for a bullet!" Joe boomed.

Kate concentrated on taking deep, quiet breaths. Willing the waves to stop trembling out of her. The men were moving again. She had hoped they would have gone in the opposite direction, but the cacophony of heavy boots crashing through branches and dead leaves grew louder. She watched from the ground as the shadowy figures emerged from behind trees about 30 feet away. She shrunk back against Daryl and held her breath.

'Joe, I think I can hear 'em." One of them men shouted.

In the distance she could hear something too, and she prayed silently that whatever it was would lead them far away. They watched as their backs vanish into the trees, in pursuit of the noise, and listened to their steps long after they no longer were seen. They laid there until the last whispers of their retreat disappeared and quietly inched their way out. Daryl crouched down, working on untieing the knot that held the two shoelaces in his hands together. In all the confusion, she hadn't even noticed his boots were missing them and she wondered briefly why. He started weaving the first lace through his boot and she took the other from his bloodied hands. Her hands shook as she tried to lace it and she marveled at the fact that Daryl's hands were steady. As soon as they were tied, he motioned her to follow him and they made their way through the woods in the opposite direction as Joe.

They picked their way slowly through the underbrush, stepping over roots and climbing over fallen trees. It was hard enough terrain to navigate in the day, much less in the dark. She was thankful that autumn had caused most the trees to drop their leaves or even the dim light of the moon would be hidden.

Their slowed speed also allowed them to stay relatively quiet, which not only kept their location hidden from their pursuers, but the walkers that surely infested these woods. She stayed glued to Daryl's side, every muscle in her body tense and her eyes straining in the darkness. Every shadow might be a walker. Every noise could be Joe ready to kill them. They hardly spoke a word to each other, not being able to risk any unnecessary noise.

They'd been moving through the woods like that for about 45 minutes when they heard the snapping of a branch echo not far from them. Daryl came to a stop and aimed his crossbow into the darkness in the direction of the noise. Kate gripped the gun. The noise was followed by the rustling of leaves as something large made its way towards them. Daryl quickly pushed her in the direction of a large boulder and they ducked behind it. She knew hiding wasn't Daryl's style, that this duck and cover routine was for her benefit. She was sure it took everything in him to not run to meet the threat, be it walker or human, but he didn't want to risk her life or even his, leaving her to try (and likely fail) to get back to the prison on her own.

Kate leaned against the cold boulder, praying whatever it was would pass, straining to hear any clue that would give them an idea as to what had just made its way feet from where they were hiding. It was difficult since the loudest sound was her own blood pounding in her ears. They heard a deep growl and Daryl quickly stood, "Never thought I'd be so glad to see a walker." he said, sending a bolt flying.

She stood with a sigh of relief and followed him as he collected his arrow and continued on.

This same scenario played out several more times and everytime they would find cover, she was convinced it would be this time that it was Joe and that they were discovered.

Kate had no sense of how far from the truck they had been when they first ran into the men or how much further they had gone the hours and hours they wandered the woods with them, but as the first hints of morning turned the sky from black to gray, Daryl said they weren't too much further. They pushed harder, risking the noise in an effort to put an end to the nightmare. Her ribs ached and her face throbbed from where Len's fist made contact, but with the promise of safety so close, she hardly cared.

Not long after, Daryl pointed through the trees and there was just enough light to see the red roof of the feed store. She wanted to shout for joy and run as hard as she could, but she held back. They had no way of knowing what was between here and the truck. As they neared the shop, they began to see more walkers wandering through the woods aimlessly. The herd had passed, but plenty of stragglers remained.

"Stay close." Daryl said, unnecessarily and they continued weaving quietly in and out of the trees. The big silver truck sat exactly where Daryl had parked it and a strangled sound, made of equal parts relief and glee, escaped from Kate's throat. There were a couple walkers they'd have to deal with to get there, but they exchanged relieved smiles.

Once, in high school, Kate had gone snorkeling. She had been underwater, breathing comfortably through the tube and watching the colorful fish flit in schools in front of her face, when suddenly she was absolutely sure a shark was behind her. She had no reason to believe this, aside from an active imagination and a recent viewing of Jaws, but the feeling was powerful enough to send her thrashing around in the water to see behind her. There wasn't a shark, but she managed to inhale a mouthful of salty seawater in the process.

The last hundred yards in the woods was just like that. She could almost feel Joe and his men approaching. She felt like a shot would sound at any second. Her elbows and knees felt weak and her stomach flip flopped, but as they came out safely on the other side of the treeline, the woods remained silent. They ran across the yellowed grass that grew in the field between the trees and the shop. Daryl slamming his crossbow into any walker that came close enough to be a danger. She almost expected to find Joe on the porch of the store, waiting to take them by surprise, but as they reached the truck, she found they were still alone. She wrenched the door open and scrambled in. Daryl opened the driver's door and handed her the crossbow and then the rifle before getting behind the wheel. The keys were still in the ignition and he started the engine and drove away.

Kate took in what felt like her first full breath since they went running from the store into the woods. Her ribs ached in protest.

"How far are we from home?" She asked, frantically searching out the window for any sign of the men in the trees.

"'bout an hour."

They drove down the tiny main street, the small buildings of the town flying past in a blur as Daryl sped away. Relief, as well as disbelief that they had escaped at all, was initially all she could feel. But as distance separated them from the woods and the adrenaline that had kept her going all these hours began to fade away, a heaviness settled in her chest. She hadn't slept, they'd hardly stopped moving, her injuries were beginning to throb and she felt the emotional toll start to pester the edges of her mind. She suddenly wanted to be comforted. She wanted Daryl to stop the truck so she could crawl in his lap and bawl her eyes out, but she knew they couldn't risk it. They had to get home, far away from here, from the woods, from those men. She glanced over at Daryl, his eyes fixed on the road. He looked exhausted and upset.

"You ok?" She asked softly.

" 'm fine." He mumbled dismissively, without a glance in her direction, his hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.

She stared at him for a minute longer before he looked over at her briefly, returning his eyes to the road with a sigh and sticking his thumbnail in his mouth. She turned back to the window, the heaviness in her chest evolving to a dull ache. Something in Daryl's response wounded her. It made her feel rejected and alone. She fought back the hot tears that welled up in her eyes, wiping them away quickly and forcing herself to think about something, anything, so she wouldn't completely break down in front of him. She stared at the road, counting the broken, yellow traffic lines as they slipped by. Before long, exhaustion took over and she fell asleep.

* * *

\- DARYL -

Daryl drove the truck up the path to the gate. The prison loomed in the background and he felt both relieved to have arrived and some dread at the prospect of having to explain what happened to them.

The gate slowly opened and Daryl drove in, he didn't bother waking Kate who had been sleeping almost the entire drive home. He came to a stop as soon as he passed through and rolled the window down as Maggie and Glenn approached.

"Hey guys!" Glenn said. "Where've you been? We expected you back by last night, we were starting to worry."

His voice was enough to pull Kate out of her sleep and she raised her head, groggy and blinking hard. The left side of her face was swollen and the mark Len had left was blossoming in darker shades of purple and violet across her cheek and under her eye.

"Holy shit!" Maggie exclaimed. "What the hell happened to you?!"

Daryl winced and looked straight ahead, out the window. It was like her face was a walking billboard for his failure to protect her.

"We ran into some trouble. She probably should see your dad or Dr. S." Daryl answered.

Maggie crossed to the other side of the truck. As Kate climbed out and Maggie wrapped her arms around her, Daryl was pretty sure he heard her start to cry. It felt like his chest was going to rip in two.

"Daryl, what happened?" Glenn asked.

"I gotta get this truck unloaded and find Rick." He put the truck in drive and drove away from a confused Glenn, passing Maggie and Kate on their way up to the prison.

He parked the truck in the courtyard and realized there weren't many things to unload, but he started anyway. He took the bags of food Kate had collected at the house and walked them to the cafeteria. When he got back to the truck, Rick and Greg were going through the plumbing supplies. Rick looked up when he saw Daryl returning.

"Heard you ran into some trouble. You guys ok?"

Daryl looked over at Greg disapprovingly before motioning with his head for Rick to follow him several feet away.

Rick was the only one he didn't mind having to tell. He needed to know, since technically it was a threat to the group and if anyone understood the shame of failing to protect your woman, it was him.

"Ran into a group of men, 'bout 40 miles south of here. We'd been at a feed store, got overrun by walkers. We had to run into the woods. They got us there. They weren't lookin' to make friends. We were lucky we got out at all."

Concern darkened Rick's face. "Is Kate alright?" He didn't specifically say what he was really asking, but Daryl understood.

"Ya, but it was close. She has some injuries, I think she's gettin' checked out now."

"How many were there?"

"Seven, to start. Three of 'em left. Kate killed one of 'em."

Rick raised his eyebrows and then shook his head slowly.

"Any chance they followed you back?"

Daryl shook his head.

"You ok?"

Daryl gave him a hard look before finally nodding his head in his typical jerking motion. Rick looked at him doubtfully , but nodded and walked past Daryl towards the truck, patting him on the shoulder as he went.

Greg was still sorting through the supplies and Daryl figured he and Rick had it handled, he wasn't in the mood for awkward small talk. He headed to "C Block" to make sure Kate was getting checked out. He took the stairs to the upper cells two at a time.

Recently, he had followed through on his promise to Kate and he and Glenn managed to remove the bunks from the wall in both their cells. A quick run to a neighborhood close to the prison and they had two queen sized mattresses. One of which was taking up the majority of their cell, leaving little room for much else. Their curtains were pushed all the way open, allowing as much light as possible into the square, cement room. Maggie sat at the end of the bed by Kate's feet, while Dr. S. stood talking softly. They all three turned their eyes to Daryl as he leaned against the bars on the outside of the cell.

"Good Morning Daryl." Dr. S. said, a kind smile on his face.

"Mornin' Dr. S. She going to be ok?" He asked, finding it hard to even look at Kate without hating himself.

"She's going to be fine. Her biggest problem is her ribs, I can't know for sure without an xray, but it seems likely that a couple of them are cracked. Nothing much we can do for that anyway, she's just got to take it easy. They should heal on their own in about 6 weeks. I told her if the pain got to be too much to let me know and we'd get her some pain killers. Other than that, she's pretty bruised and battered, a slight concussion, but nothing I'm overly concerned about. She'll probably be really tired for a couple days, but should be fine after some rest." Dr. S. turned back to Kate, "I'm going to let you sleep now. I'll be back tomorrow to check on you, please let me know if you need anything before then."

"Thank you." Kate said as he walked out the cell door. Daryl thanked him too and Dr. S. stuck out his hand, Daryl looked at it for a moment like it was a foreign object and then shook it and the doctor headed down the steps.

"Well I should let you two get some sleep." Maggie said, standing.

"Naw, not me." Daryl said, shaking his head. "Got some things I need to do."

"What things?" Kate asked. "You haven't gotten any sleep."

"I'm a'right." He replied. "Get some sleep"

He turned and walked away, but not before seeing the confusion on Kate's face. Daryl almost turned back. Part of him wanted to get in that bed and fall asleep with her in his arms. But he didn't deserve to. The one thing he thought he brought to the relationship was protection. He could keep her safe, believed he was more capable of that than anyone else. But now he knew that wasn't true at all. It had been his idea to take her on the run. He left them vulnerable in the woods, not even aware enough of their surroundings to notice seven men approach. His escape plan had nearly gotten her raped and she'd killed someone, something he had hoped she'd never have to do. That might have been a naive thought given the world they lived in, but he hated that she had to do it and that he was the cause. He knew Kate wouldn't reject him, but she should and that is what kept him from turning back around. He walked out to the yard. Either Rick of Greg had parked the truck with their other vehicles. Daryl climbed into the bed, rolling up his vest and stuffing it under his head. It took awhile, but eventually sleep claimed him.

* * *

\- KATE -

Kate was dreaming. She was lost in the woods and it was dark. There wasn't even a sliver of moonlight. She could hear her mother calling for her, but she couldn't tell from where. She tried to find her, stumbling in the pitch black, but her voice had disappeared. In its place was the low growl of a dog. She knew it was near her, but she couldn't see where. She started to run and heard it snarling close behind her, it's warm breath on the back of her legs. She tripped over a tree root and went sprawling to the ground. The dog was about to tear into her, a scream tore from her throat.

She woke suddenly, damp with sweat, her head pounding. It was dark, but she knew she was home, safe in the cell she shared with Daryl. Except she was alone in their bed.

As she remembered the events of the last 24 hours, the heaviness returned to her chest, seeping in slowly until it felt like something real. Like they could crack open her aching ribs and find a big black mass just taking up space. She couldn't shake it. Unwanted memories of their ordeal played in her mind over and over. Joe pointing his gun at Daryl's head as Tony dug his fingers painfully into her arm. The vile things Len was saying, for the sake of terrorizing her and baiting Daryl into doing something stupid. The fear that coursed through her body when Len knocked her to the ground and covered her nose and mouth with his hand. She could still smell him, a ripe, spoiled stench like raw chicken that has just started to go bad. And of course, over and over, in agonizing slow motion, she replayed the moment she killed that man. Billy. She didn't feel guilt or remorse, she knew he would have killed Daryl. She knew she had no choice. But whenever she recalled the fear that widened his eyes before she shot him dead, the dark thing in her chest would swell. Taking a life, even in self-defense, was still something awful and she didn't know what she was supposed to do with that. She wondered if Daryl felt that way and she wished he was here so she could ask him.

Where was Daryl?

She sat up, her bare feet landing softly on the cold, cement floor. She felt a little dizzy and gripped the side of the bed until it passed. She clicked on the battery powered lantern that sat on the upturned milk carton that they used as a nightstand. The cell filled with soft light and she noticed that someone, probably Maggie, had closed the curtains and left a granola bar for her. Kate bent down to pull her socks on and shove her feet in her boots. Her ribs screamed in protest. She looked down and realized she was still wearing her mud caked shirt. She dragged it over her head and tossed it in the corner. She was sure she'd never wear it again. She grabbed a thermal and slowly slipped it over her head, working her hands down the sleeves and trying to move as little as possible. She stood and grabbed the flashlight off the metal shelf and headed into the quiet of a sleeping 'C Block'.

The moon shone softly through the long, narrow windows and Kate made her way silently down the steps and headed into the yard. She didn't know who was on watch tonight, but thought maybe they'd know where Daryl was. She walked quickly in that direction, shivering in the cold air, the flashlight beam bobbing out in front of her. As she drew closer, she could see the outline of his crossbow leaned up against the rails.

"Daryl? Are you up there?" She shouted into the darkness.

"What are you doin' out here. Doc said you needed to rest."

He was a master at avoiding the question.

"I woke up and you weren't there. Have you gotten any sleep?"

"I'm fine."

"I'm coming up, ok?" She wasn't sure why she felt she had to ask.

"No. I'm fine. Go back inside and sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

She couldn't see his face, she could only hear his tired, rough voice. She wanted to refuse. She thought for a second about ignoring his order, like she so often did, and heading up there anyway, making him talk to her or at the very least make him sleep, but she didn't have any fight left and that heaviness was grabbing at her again. Sleep was the only way she had been able to quiet it, so she sighed heavily and turned around to find her way back to her cell.

Back inside she kicked her boots off and crawled into their bed. She didn't understand why Daryl was being so distant, didn't know if he was angry at her because she had wanted so badly to go on the run with him, or maybe because she was the reason he had to give in to those men. She made him vulnerable. Maybe he just looked at her differently now, maybe all he could see when he saw her was Len or maybe Billy. She didn't know, her head hurt and her heart was aching. She buried her face into Daryl's pillow, trying to comfort herself with his smell. Tears filled her eyes and there was no reason to stop them. She cried into his pillow until sleep dragged her back under.

"Sweetie. Sweetie." Maggie's gentle voice woke her. The cell was filled with morning light and her friend was perched on the side of her bed, smiling down at her brightly. "You sleep ok?"

"Ya." Kate lied.

"Hungry? Wanna go get some breakfast?

Kate rolled on her back, groaning softly at the pain it caused her ribs, and looked up at the gray ceiling. The dull ache returned to her chest and with it the dark feeling that seemed to be a permanent part of her now. Everything flooded back to her mind, including the fact that Daryl had stayed in the tower all last night. His absence made everything seem worse. She threw one arm over her eyes, thinking it could prevent the tears from escaping.

"I don't know Maggie. I don't think I'm very...hu..hu..hungry." Her voice betrayed her, she didn't get the sentence out without the emotion tripping up her words.

"Oh honey, are you ok? Do you want to talk about it?" Maggie laid down next to her. Kate kept her arm over her face and took a deep breath. She didn't know where to start, but she needed to get it out so it wasn't just festering inside of her.

Once she opened her mouth, the whole story came spilling out of her in a sobbing, snotty flood. She told Maggie everything, for some reason starting back at the house with Doug & Christine's wedding album. She told her about Joe and his group, the horrible things Len had said and tried to do, how Daryl had beat him to death, not stopping even when he'd been dead. She told her how she kept thinking of the man she had killed, the look on his face as she pulled the trigger and ended his life and how she felt haunted by it. That she felt like she'd never escape the suffocating heaviness of that action, no matter how necessary.

"And now Daryl won't talk to me, barely looks at me. I don't know what I did or what he's thinking. He hasn't been up here since Dr. S. was here and I just want him so badly and I don't know what to do."

Admitting the last part brought a fresh onslaught of tears. Maggie listened carefully the whole time. When Kate finished she waited a few seconds before talking and then spoke softly, barely above a whisper.

"I know how you feel, I really do. I know we've never really talked about it, but when Merle took me and Glenn to Woodbury, they had us in different rooms. The Governor, he wanted me to tell him where the prison was. I wouldn't and he made me strip down, threatening me with Glenn. I was sure he was going to rape me. Kill me. Kill Glenn too. I've never been so afraid in my life. I know Glenn felt so helpless and guilty. Like on top of the fear he had for his own life, he felt like he had failed to protect me. I'm sure Daryl feels that way too."

Kate turned to look at Maggie, realization dawning in her eyes. Maggie shook her head.

"It took me and Glenn awhile to get back to ourselves, and I know Daryl is a harder nut to crack than Glenn."

Kate managed a little laugh. "That's the understatement of the year."

"And Kate, that feeling you have, about killing that man. It gets better. Everyday it gets a little easier. You get used to the fact that it happened and you move on. Somedays, I don't even think about it and on the days I do, it's not overwhelming anymore. I don't know why, but I promise it'll get better."

Maggie's words had the desired effect. Kate felt the weight on her chest ease up just a little and she could swear it was actually easier to breathe. She didn't feel so alone.

"Thank you Maggie. Really."

Maggie smiled, her green eyes full of kindness. "You're welcome. I'll go get you a washcloth and some water and then maybe we can get something to eat."

Kate nodded and Maggie left the cell.

* * *

\- DARYL -

It was early afternoon when Daryl slipped back through the gates, a string of squirrels to show for his efforts. Shortly after Sasha relieved him from guard duty this morning he escaped to the woods, away from prying questions and away from Kate. He didn't know where to start with her. What to say. How to apologize for failing her when she needed him most. Maybe if she was pissed this would be easier. If she would scream right out loud that he was to blame for the whole fucking situation, maybe then he would know what to do. Instead she just seemed sad that he was avoiding her, just another way he was letting her down. She should be angry. She should blame him for for everything. He felt frozen, no clue what to do. In over his head and wondering why he ever thought he could make this work.

He carried the squirrels to a table in the courtyard that had become the designated place for the carnage that was gutting a catch and went to work on the small creatures.

"There you are. You're a hard man to find today." Carol said, a smile on her face and her hands on her hips.

"Somethin' you need?" He grumbled, without taking his eyes off the squirrel as he ran his knife down its furry belly.

"Wanted to talk to you."

"'bout what?"

"Talked to Maggie this morning." Carol said, like he should know what that meant.

"Ya."

"Kate's upset Daryl. She says you've been avoiding her" She paused and when it was clear Daryl wasn't going to respond she continued. "You two just went through something awful together. You really going to make her deal with that on her own? She needs you."

Daryl threw his knife down on the table, turning angrily towards Carol.

"What she needs is a man that can protect her!" He snarled.

"Is that what this is about Daryl?" Carol said incredulously, folding her arms across her chest. "You don't think you can protect her?"

Daryl looked away from her bitterly, picking up his knife again.

'Daryl, do you think she'd be alive right now if you hadn't been there? Unless I heard wrong, there were SEVEN men and you managed to get you both out, unharmed. If that's not protecting, I don't know what is."

"We shouldn't have been out there!" He shouted, gesticulating wildly. "I shouldn't have put us in that position."

"Daryl, you didn't do that. It's just the shitty world we live in."

"I can't, Carol." He stopped, trying to collect himself, wondering if he could find the words to explain how he felt. "I can't look at her face like that without seeing that asshole on top of her. I should've…If I had just...I don't know."

"You need to get over that. For her sake. Don't punish her for something that filth did. You did everything you could to save her and you did. It sounds like she saved you too. Something like this can break you or bring you closer, don't be a fool Daryl. You'll hate yourself for it."

Daryl looked at her, desperation in his eyes. "I don't know what to do."

"Just go find her. You'll figure it out. You both will."

Carol walked away, leaving Daryl standing there. He stared down at the half gutted squirrel. Fuck it. Carol was right, what was he doing. He tossed the knife down again, abandoning the squirrels. They weren't going anywhere.

He headed to find her, stopping only to wash up in the water buckets before heading to their cell, hoping she'd be there. He pulled back the curtain and found her sleeping, curled up on her side. He kicked off his boots and slid in next to her, pulling her into his arms gently, mindful of her ribs. She still let out a little cry.

"I'm sorry Kate."

"Daryl?" She said, still mostly asleep. "I've missed you so much."

"I know. Go back to sleep."

She turned into his arms, burying her face in his chest and was out again. He laid there listening to the soft sounds of her breathing and realized how much better he felt already.

A short time later, Maggie poked her head in to check on Kate.

"Oh sorry. I didn't know you were in here." Maggie whispered, a big smile on her face as she backed out of the cell, pulling the curtain behind her.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

\- KATE -

Little House at the Prison. That is what Kate had started to jokingly call it, remembering fondly the Laura Ingalls Wilder books her mother had read to her as a child. Some days that's exactly what it felt like, like they were settlers working tirelessly to build a life for themselves out in the middle of nowhere. Except instead of a one room log cabin, they lived in a sprawling cement fortress.

She'd been spending her days in the yard with Rick and Carl as they prepped and planted the first garden. Usually others would join them too, deciding they wanted to try their hand at farming. It was rewarding, she found she liked working in dirt, putting energy into something that would help sustain a life here.

Rick was like a new man. True to his word, he'd relinquished leadership to the council and had thrown himself fully into farming, Carl his somewhat reluctant sidekick. She was sure she'd seen Rick smile more in the last couple weeks than the entire time she'd known him. She wondered if this was the man Lori had married and was sorry she wasn't here to live this life with them now. Carl, who still would prefer to do something exciting, involving no doubt a gun in his hand, wasn't unpleasant and she started to see glimpses of the little boy she had first met back at quarry camp.

Since Daryl and Kate returned, the council had recommended runs should consist of at least four people. It wasn't fool-proof by any stretch, and there could be exceptions, but it did seem a wiser move. The only one who didn't seem to adhere to the new rule was Michonne and for whatever reason the council didn't press the issue. She was hardly home anymore, constantly searching for the governor. Daryl had stopped going on those runs with her and in fact, aside from a couple short trips he had organized, he'd been at home more and for longer stretches than since he and Kate had been together. She knew it was mostly because of her, what they'd gone through.

Physically she was almost completely healed. After almost two solid days of sleep, which Dr. S assured her was normal with a concussion, she felt much better. The bruise on her face had given many colors of the rainbow a turn: from the bright purple and violet of the fresh injury, to black and blue and now a sickly yellow that faded more each day. Her ribs felt much better, breathing didn't hurt anymore, but sometimes she'd forget her injury and would twist just the right way to throw a shovelful of dirt over her shoulder and they'd shout their protest.

The awful, dark feeling, as Maggie predicted, became less of an issue each day. She felt that she was slowly feeling more like herself. It still was disturbing to her, the whole thing, and she spent more time than she should thinking about all the ways things could have gone differently. How easily they could both be dead, or worse. She and Daryl didn't really discuss it, but she'd been having nightmares since they'd been back and she couldn't exactly hide those from him. Sometimes in her dreams, she'd be running alone through the woods with something chasing her - an animal, a walker, Joe. Sometimes it would be like they were back there being discovered by the men all over again, but this time they'd kill Daryl immediately. The gunshot ringing in her ears as she screamed. Either way she'd thrash and cry out in her sleep, waking Daryl, who would remind her they were both home and safe. If the others heard her, and there was really no way they couldn't living in the cell block together, they never said anything, but she got the impression everyone was treating her gently.

The sun beat down on her as she pulled at some weeds that seemed to have magically shot up overnight around where they'd planted the peas. She wiped sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand and decided to take a break and head up for some lunch.

She stood, squinting into the sun and called out to Rick who worked with a shovel about 20 feet away.

"I'm going up for lunch. You guys taking a break soon?"

Carl looked at his dad hopefully. Rick smiled, "Carl, go ahead, I'll finish up here."

Carl tossed down his hoe happily and joined her as she headed up to the prison.

"I'm going to head over to the showers and see if Daryl wants lunch, you coming?"

"No, I'm STARVING." Carl said, a pained look on his face.

Kate grinned. "Ok, I'll meet you over there."

Kate headed inside, her eyes taking a minute to adjust in the dark hall after hours in the bright sun. Daryl had been helping get the showers up and running. They were trying to bring two of the prison's bathrooms into some sort of functioning shape. It was still going to be rudimentary, a simple pump that drew from a big barrel of water that needed to be refilled by hand. Filling the water barrels they used throughout the prison was a tedious chore that consisted of cranking a wheel in the prison yard that pumped water from the creek just outside the gates. The hose ran under the fence and they would fill buckets that had to be hauled up and emptied into the barrels in the courtyard and the bathrooms. In the bathrooms they had been filling pitchers of water from the barrels and using them in the trough sinks to wash up. Now, with the equipment they needed, they would be able to use a hand pump to draw water up into a rigged maze of pipes and shower heads. The water would be cold, the pressure lacking and the showers short, but it would be glorious to get one on a regular basis.

"Hey." She smiled brightly at Daryl who was standing on a step ladder and tightening a pipe. "It's coming along!"

He finished with the wrench and stepped down. He wiped his hands on the sides of his pants.

"We should have showers by the end of the week, maybe sooner."

"I'm so excited!" And she truly was. "Hey, I'm going down to eat, want to come?"

"Naw. I'm gonna finish up here."

"Ok. Need anything?" She asked.

"Nope. I'm good." Wrench in one hand, he used the other to pull her towards him by her waist. "How's the farm today?"

"Dirty. I'll be glad when I can use these showers. So get back to work!" She teased, kissing him. She started to walk away before she remembered she promised Beth an answer.

"Oh ya, I wanted to ask you something." She started. "You know Beth is seeing that new guy, Zach. He came in with that college group."

Daryl nodded. "Mmmhmm."

"Well she wants us to have a picnic with them. Out in the yard with Maggie and Glenn too. Kind of like a triple date."

Daryl looked like the idea literally caused him pain. He tipped his head back and groaned.

"Come on, it won't be that bad. It's Maggie, Glenn and Beth. You know them."

"I ain't really the picnic type."

"Please?" They looked at each other for a second, a sort of mock stand off, but they both knew he'd

give in.

"Fine."

She smiled and rewarded him with a kiss.

The next afternoon, they found themselves sitting on a big yellow sheet that Beth had spread out on the grass. She had made every effort to make this a real picnic, but without the benefit of sandwiches and lemonade, they had to make due with substitutes like crackers spread with peanut butter and little cans of diced fruit. Still, for end of the world standards it was a feast.

Zach lounged back on the sheet, propped up on one elbow, his legs crossed out in front of him. Everything about him seemed like the old world - his casual mannerisms, the things he spoke about, the lack of weariness in his eyes. Maybe most of all was the way he was with Beth. He reminded Kate of a frat boy trying to smooth talk the sweet and innocent, laying back and telling elaborate tales of his life. As if one-upping your professor or having a fast car mattered at all anymore. Beth seemed to lap it up though. She sat facing him, her sweet smile lighting up her whole face, hanging on every word and giggling. Maggie kept rolling her eyes, which Kate found very amusing.

Kate wondered what Zach's story was, she knew he came in with the college group and they certainly had seen their share of carnage, but he came off as someone who hadn't seen such things. Despite this, she didn't think Zach was a bad guy, just someone who didn't get it. He seemed eager to get to know them all and happy that Beth had gone to the effort to plan this.

"So Glenn," Zach started. "What did you do?"

"What did I do?" Glenn asked.

"You know, before all this."

"I delivered pizzas." He said, knowing it was the most underwhelming answer.

"In Atlanta?"

"Yep. Rico's Pizza. Thirty minutes or less or your next pizza is free."

"Hey! I think I remember that place." He gestured between Maggie and Glenn. "Were you guys together before all this?"

"No." Maggie said, giving Glenn a big smile. "Met him when the group showed up on our doorstep."

"Technically," Glenn added. "We met when you galloped up on a horse in the middle of the woods and smashed a walker in the head with a bat."

"Impressive!" Zach said, eyebrows raised.

"I'm pretty sure Glenn fell in love in that second." Kate added. "You should have seen the look on his face."

She mimicked his stunned expression and everyone laughed. Glenn threw a cracker at her.

"What about you two?" Zach asked, turning his attention to Kate and Daryl. "You guys meet after the turn too?"

Daryl snorted and shook his head. "Regular Sherlock, ain't ya."

Kate ignored him. "Yes, we met at the very beginning. We both ended up in the camp after Atlanta fell. Glenn was there too." She smiled. "But we didn't get together until more recently, since we've been here."

"You guys get married like Maggie and Glenn?"

"Man, you sure ask a lot of questions." Daryl snarled, not completely unfriendly, but he stood and walked a few feet towards the fence like he was suddenly interested in what the walkers were doing.

Zach looked amused, but undeterred. "I'll take that as a no then?"

Kate shrugged. "No, we aren't _married_." She said married like it was suddenly a foreign word. "We're just…" She stopped, suddenly realizing she didn't know how to finish the sentence. She glanced nervously at Beth and then Maggie, she even thought Daryl had stilled to hear what she had to say.

She just laughed and shrugged, "We just _are."_

Zach seemed to accept that, smiling in that boyish way, and moved on.

"What did you do, before?" He asked her.

"I worked in an office. Nothing exciting."

"How about you Daryl?" Zach shouted towards the fence. They all exchanged looks, surprised Zach would pursue his questioning with Daryl

Daryl looked up, clearly annoyed.

"Guess."

* * *

\- DARYL -

Daryl was torn from a deep sleep. He sat up in bed, eyes straining to see in the darkness, listening carefully for any sign of what woke him. His heart pounded and he grabbed the knife that always sat on the crate next to their bed. Beside him, Kate began to groan, her body thrashing, her legs kicking the sheets off of them. He should have known. This wasn't the first nightmare she'd had since they returned from their misadventure in the woods. He laid back down, pulling her towards him while trying to quietly reassure her.

"Kate. Kate. Its ok." He whispered into her ear. "We're home. We're safe. You're having a nightmare."

She quieted and went still. After a second she turned into him and he could hear the peaceful sounds of her breathing. Daryl laid there for awhile and tried to calm down enough to fall back asleep. Usually he couldn't. This morning would be no different. Their curtains started to slowly glow as the sun light worked its way through the narrow windows outside their cell. When he was sure it was a lost cause, he eased himself slowly out of bed, hoping she could get some more sleep. He headed down the metal steps and out into the common room. It was empty, which wasn't surprising considering the hour. He found the tubs of cereal and a plastic bowl and poured some bran flakes out. Sitting on the cement steps, he tipped his head back and dropped them by the fingerful into his mouth and worried about Kate.

Hershel walked into the common room from C-Block, Michonne had found him a prosthetic leg on one of her runs and Daryl was still getting used to seeing him without his crutches.

"Mornin' Daryl."

"Mornin' Hershel." Daryl said. "Kate wake you?"

"No. No, I was up." Concern darkened his face. "But I heard her. We've all heard her. Poor thing. What does she say she's dreaming about? Those men?"

Daryl shrugged. "Probably, we haven't really talked about it." He mumbled.

The lines in Hershel's face deepened as he considered that for a minute.

"Daryl, can I share something with you?"

Daryl nodded. He sensed this conversation was turning personal and he felt a little panicked, but it was Hershel and he respected the man too much to shut him down.

"When I was married to my first wife, Maggie's mother, I was a different man than the one that sits before you today. My father wasn't an easy man, and when he drank, which was nearly always, he was even worse. I left home when I was 15, I guess that all had an effect on me and although I loved my wife very much, I didn't know the first thing about opening up to her or even talking to her about things. I was afraid if I did, she might not like what she saw. Josephine was a good woman and she loved me in spite of these shortcomings, but after she died I felt great regret that I hadn't shared more with her."

Daryl looked down into the bowl of bran flakes. Hershel continued.

"When I married Annette, I had already changed a lot. Being a single father to a growing, feisty girl does that to a man. I promised myself I would do better this time. It was difficult at first, I don't imagine I was much good at it, but I know that Annette knew I was trying and she loved me even more for it. Pretty soon, I couldn't imagine not being able to go to her about what was on my mind."

Hershel took a deep breath. "I tell you this, not because I think Kate is unhappy with you, on the contrary, anyone can see how much love there is between the two of you and how badly you both need one another. I tell you this only because it reminds me so much of how it was with me and Jo and I don't want you to have any regrets."

Hershel looked hard at Daryl. Daryl met his eyes hesitantly. He felt exposed, but for once he didn't feel defensive.

"Daryl, I don't pretend to know where you came from or who you were before, but I do know that you're a good man and if Kate were one of my daughters, I'd be happy that you found each other."

Daryl's face betrayed the effect those words had on him and Hershel smiled, his kind eyes crinkling.

The gate to C-block opened again and this time Beth walked out.

"Mornin' Daddy. Mornin' Daryl." She said.

"Mornin' Bethie." Hershel said, opening his Bible.

Daryl stood. "Thanks Hershel" He said quietly, before heading outside.

Later that night Daryl pulled the truck into the yard and he and Kate sat on the hood, their backs against the windshield and their eyes fixed on the stars and the bright moon. It was the same sky and the same stars that hung up there when the world was still marching on and for some reason that seemed odd.

Daryl's rough hand rested on her knee and she drew circles on his arm with her soft fingertips.

"Kate, when we were out there, with those men." Daryl paused and took a deep breath. "All I could think about was getting you out. Once we got away, I was thinkin', I kept thinkin' about if I had lost you. I felt like I'd failed you, getting us in the situation."

"Daryl, it wasn't you." Kate started to protest.

"Let me finish, this don't come easy for me and if I stop, I might not get it all out."

Kate went quiet, even her fingers stilling on his arm.

"When we got back. I was angry. I was an idiot."

Daryl stopped, but Kate remained silent.

"Kate." He let out a shaky breath. "I love you. Longer than I even knew. I want you to be my wife. I don't want you to not know what to say when people ask what we are. I don't have much to offer, I can't promise to keep you safe or that we'll be happy, but I'll try. I'll try my whole life."

The moon hung bright in the sky and Daryl could make out the big grin on her face and his heart, which had been beating hard in his chest, felt like it swelled to twice the size.

She leaned into him, taking his face in both her hands and kissing him.

"I can't wait to be your wife." She whispered against his lips.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

\- KATE -

Kate stepped into the freezing stream of water and let out a screech. She had seriously overestimated her tolerance of cold water and her naked skin broke out in goosebumps. She raced to wash the dirt and grime from her body, the gray water pooling at her feet. Her skin was red and numb. She yanked the elastic band out of her hair and squeezed a liberal amount of shampoo into the palm of her hand. She couldn't remember the last time she had a real shower - probably back at the CDC, for that one glorious night they thought they'd found somewhere safe. She was pretty sure that night was the first time she saw Daryl smile, he was drunk, but he was smiling.

She scrubbed at her scalp and let the icy water rinse the lather away. She pushed her soapy fingers between her toes, checked to make sure her nails were clear of all the dirt she'd collected from the garden and quickly turned the water off. She grabbed her towel, threw it around her shoulders and buried her face into her fists as they held the terry cloth around her. She was shivering.

Not twenty minutes ago, she had been out in the garden with Rick and Carl. They were working on clearing out the next area for planting when she looked up and spotted Daryl heading down from the prison. She dug her shovel straight into the ground, leaned against it and watched her man make his way towards her. Watching him walk never got old and the familiar tingle ran up her spine. Rick called out a greeting to Daryl, who nodded in his direction before coming to a stop in front of Kate. He squinted in the sun and looked around the yard restlessly.

"Talked to Hershel. We're all set." He said.

Kate was surprised, it was only last night that Daryl had confessed he wanted to marry her. A bubble of excitement traveled from the pit of her stomach to her throat and emerged as a huge grin across her face.

"When?" She asked.

"Today. This evening. Is that a'right?" A trace of doubt in his eyes, like she might have changed her mind.

Her grin grew even wider and she shook her head vigorously, words failing her for once. A smile shyly turned the corner of Daryl's mouth and he stepped towards her, slipping his arms around her and kissing her in a rare display of public affection.

"Ew. Gross." Carl shouted.

Daryl pulled back quickly, pointing a finger in the boy's direction.

"Watch it little man." He growled good naturedly.

Carl laughed, not afraid for a second.

"I wouldn't mess with Daryl if I were you." Rick teased his son.

Kate had tried to get back to work after Daryl headed up to the prison, but she was too excited. Instead she decided to go take a shower. Her first chance since they'd finished them. So now she stood in her cell, clean, but shivering cold. She dressed quickly. She only had two pairs of jeans - the ones she wore in the field and the other pair that she changed into when her day of work was done. She slipped the cleaner pain on and chose a gauzy peasant style top from the half dozen choices she had. It was cream colored with little blue flowers embroidered along the front. It was the prettiest thing she owned, most the others being t-shirts or thermals. It had come back from a run a few weeks ago and she had snatched it up. She brushed her long hair and wished she had a straightener or even a blow dryer to tame the frizz. It had been a long time since those things mattered much, but it was her wedding day after all.

She headed to Beth's cell and found her friend playing on the floor with Judith. They both looked up as she knocked on a metal bar.

"Hi!" Beth said with a sweet smile, probably happy for some grown up interaction. "You're not in the garden today?"

"Daryl and I have a date tonight, so Rick let me off early so I could get a chance to take a shower. Have you taken one yet? Holy crap they are freezing!"

She turned her attention to the baby. "Hey Judy, how's our sweet baby girl today?" Judith responded with a toothless grin.

"A date? What are you guys doing?" Beth asked.

Kate shrugged. "Not sure. Hey, can I borrow some of that lipstick you have?"

"Of course." Beth said, pulling herself up off the ground and hoisting Judith up on a hip while she dug her hand around a little plastic tub that sat on one of the metal shelves. She handed the tube to Kate.

"Thank you. I'll bring it back."

"No problem." She said, looking Kate over carefully. "You look so nice."

Kate laughed.

"Amazing what a shower and some clean clothes will do. Thanks for the lipstick Beth" She said, turning and walking out of the cell before her friend could ask her anything else.

Daryl and Kate had decided last night to not tell anyone except Hershel that they were exchanging vows. Their life had so little privacy, they wouldn't have a honeymoon or a home to themselves, so it was a way to have a secret between just the two of them. Well, the two of them and Hershel, but they knew he wouldn't tell. They'd let everyone else know eventually, but for now it was just theirs.

Kate walked back to her cell and using a small handheld mirror she dabbed on a tiny amount of lipstick, just enough to give them a healthy color and then smeared a small dot on each of her cheeks. Just like her mom used to do.

She felt a pang of sadness when she thought about her mom and she let out a heavy sigh. It was almost incomprehensible that her mother wouldn't be at her wedding. She wished so badly there was a way she could let her know that she was safe, taken care of and loved. She hoped for the millionth time that her family had survived and that maybe someday there would be a chance they could see each other again. Even though imagining her friends and family meeting Daryl, crossbow in hand and a string of squirrels over his shoulder, was a source of constant amusement for her, when it came down to it she knew her mom would be happy for her. She would see how devoted Daryl was and how much they loved each other. She glanced over at the tiny California flag that Daryl had brought back to her. She took it down from its place on their cell wall and folded it up, sticking it in her back pocket. It was a far cry from having her family at her wedding, but at least they were represented in some small way.

She sat on the bed and took a deep breath. There was nothing left to do but wait for Daryl to come and get her.

* * *

\- DARYL -

Daryl headed up the metal steps to the upper level of 'C Block' where their cell was. He felt conspicuous, freshly showered and in clean clothes. Michonne had just passed him as she came in from the common room. She looked him over quizzically, cocking her head to the side. Daryl shot her a look and she kept her mouth shut, walking by with an amused grin. As he came to the top of the steps he remembered when they first arrived at the prison and he'd chosen to sleep here on the ground. It was hard for him to believe how much had changed since then, but he didn't miss that spot at all.

The curtains were pulled shut on their cell door and for some odd reason he felt like he should knock, even though he hadn't since the cell went from just her's to their's. Instead he pulled the yellow and blue fabric aside and slipped quietly inside. She was sitting on the bed in a shirt he'd never seen on her before. Her hair fell around her shoulders in fluffy waves and her lips were pinker than normal. She looked beautiful and although Daryl always thought Kate looked beautiful: sleeping, crying, covered in dirt, soaking wet from rain, yelling at him, this was different. She looked more like she had that first morning he met her at the quarry camp in Atlanta. For a second all those insecurities came flooding back. He wondered what the hell he was thinking. Girls like this didn't belong with men like him. But then her face broke into a grin and it was _his_ Kate, sitting on the bed they shared, happy because she was marrying him.

Overwhelmed by the realization, he went to her quickly, pushing her back onto the bed and kissing her.

"If seeing the bride before the wedding is bad luck," She giggled. "I imagine this would be frowned upon."

He laughed and reluctantly stood, helping her to a standing position. They headed downstairs and Daryl was relieved to see that the cell block and common room were empty. They found Hershel in the courtyard, standing next to the truck. He was holding his Bible in one hand and a smile on his face.

"Ready to do this?" He asked.

"Yes sir." Daryl replied assuredly as he put his crossbow in the bed of the truck and opened the driver door. Kate climbed into the middle seat from the driver's side while Hershel eased himself into the passenger seat. Daryl started the engine and drove to the gate. They sat waiting for whoever was on duty to open it up, but instead one of the college kids climbed out of the tower and made his way to Hershel's side of the truck. Daryl didn't recognize him, but wasn't surprised when Kate greeted him.

"Hey Daniel."

"Hey Kate." He replied. Daryl didn't miss the nervous glance the kid shot his way, as if talking to Kate could get him punched in the face. Daryl laughed under his breath.

"You gonna open the gate or are we gonna sit here all day?" Daryl barked.

"Well, there's only three of you. Isn't there supposed to be at least four?" He asked, directing the question at Hershel.

"We'll take it up with the counsel when we get back." Hershel said, chuckling. The kid looked confused, but moved to open the gate and Daryl sped off down the gravel path.

He didn't go far, just enough that they had some privacy and a backdrop that didn't include barbed wire or cement. There was a little copse of trees next to a field about half a mile up the road from the prison. Daryl drove through the long, yellow grass of the field and parked where it met the treeline. He turned off the engine, leaving the keys in the ignition and turned to Kate and Hershel.

"Let me clear the area first." Daryl said. He got out of the truck, shut the door behind him and retrieved the crossbow from the back. He entered the woods and made a few clicking noises, loud enough to get the attention of any walkers in the immediate vicinity, but not loud enough to draw any from further away. He picked his way through the roots and leaves, crossbow aimed, like he had so many times before and after the fall. Daryl never imagined getting married, never thought on it at all, but now that he was it made sense that it would happen in these woods where he'd spent most his life. When he was reasonably sure they were safe, he lowered his bow and turned back towards the truck.

Daryl and Kate stood on the damp ground, facing each other between the bare trees as the sun glowed low in the sky. It had rained off and on that day and the air smelled earthy and wet. Kate beamed at him and reached both of her hands towards his. He took them, noticing how cold her's were and squeezed them in attempt to keep them warm. Hershel cleared his throat and began to speak, but Daryl's eyes never left Kate's face.

He tried to concentrate on Hershel's words, "Kate and Daryl, when I think about the two of you uniting in marriage in the middle of this unkind world, I can't help but think of the passage in Ecclesiastes that states, 'Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.'. This has already been so evident to those who have witnessed your relationship with each other. This is not a world where you can survive alone and what a blessing it is that you have found each other."

They exchanged the simple vows quietly and with unquestionable conviction. There weren't any tears, but the emotion was palpable. Daryl felt like he was under a spell and when she promised to love him all the days of her life he knew he'd never felt so humble. It hardly seemed possible that this was real. That from a lifetime of bad luck, he could end up with this woman. But it was real, it was the most real thing he had ever done.

Finally Hershel said, with great joy, "Daryl, you can kiss your wife."

 _Your wife?_ He had a wife.

Daryl let out a short laugh and looked at Hershel with a sort of stunned realization on his face. Kate's laughter bubbled out and he turned back to her, taking her head in his hands and drawing her in for a kiss.

* * *

\- Kate -

That night, high up in the guard tower, Daryl sat with his back against the corrugated metal of the guard shack looking out onto the dark yard. Kate was nestled in front of him, wrapped in a blanket, her back against his chest. His arms were wrapped around her and she had her head rested against him.

"I was thinkin' today." Daryl started, his voice quiet, but still rough. "'bout the first time we met. If someone had told me then that you'd be my wife, it would've sounded crazier than the dead walkin'."

Kate groaned and buried her head in her arm.

"Don't remind me. I don't think I was very friendly to you and Merle back in those days."

"You were scared." He said. She found it endearing that he defended her even to herself. "The world just fell apart and you were all alone and some asshole redneck wouldn't take the hint that you wanted him to leave you be. Merle was such a dick sometimes."

She laughed. "Still, anytime I think about it I feel guilty. I'm sorry."

"Ain't gotta be sorry. Nothin' to be sorry for. You were right to stay clear of us."

She leaned her head back against his shoulder and tried to look up at his face.

"Daryl, when did you start having feelings for me? I've wanted to know for a long time."

He was quiet for a minute. All she could hear were the gurgling walkers lined up along the fence. She was about to let him off the hook, at least temporarily, to tell him just how long she'd had feelings for him when he spoke.

"Remember that old house we stayed in? On the road after the farm fell?"

"Which one? There were so many."

"The one with the taxidermied bobcat. Remember? You thought it was so weird someone would have that in their living room."

"Yes. I definitely remember that place. For the record, I still think it's weird."

"You just wait, I'll have our cell decorated with a deer head one of these days."

They laughed and she could feel the vibration in his chest. It was so good to hear Daryl laugh that way.

"Anyway, that night at that house, you laid your bedroll next to mine. You could've picked any spot in the room. You could've slept next to Maggie, or Beth - anyone. But there you were, sleepin' just a couple feet away from me."

"That's when you knew you had feelings for me?" She asked, surprised. They all slept in the same room back then and it was true that she normally slept near Beth, but she remembered she had been feeling anxious that night and next to Daryl seemed like the safest spot she could be. She never imagined that Daryl had paid even a second's attention to her choice.

"No, but that was the night I knew you weren't afraid of me anymore."

So he knew she had been afraid of him, that it wasn't just Merle. That guilty pang invaded her heart again and she felt ashamed.

"I hadn't been afraid of you for a long time by then. You made me feel safer than anyone. That's why I laid down next to you that night and that's why I picked a cell next to your spot at the top of the stairs when we got to the prison. I'd already started falling for you, I just didn't think you'd ever notice or be interested."

He kissed the side of her head and buried his face into her neck.

"It did take me awhile to figure it out. Never imagined you had feelin's for me. That night, in that house, I just laid there awake. Couldn't sleep. For some reason, you not being afraid of me changed things and I wasn't sure just how. I got up and told Glenn I'd take watch. After that, just saw you differently . Found myself wantin' to keep you safe, wantin' to be near you. I told myself I shouldn't, there was no point. I fought it for awhile, but wasn't any use."

She turned around in his arms, facing him. "And now we're married. You have me and I have you."

"You have me and I have you." He repeated.

She kissed him, his stubbly face scratching at her soft lips. She pulled back and smiled. He was looking at her intently, a look she knew well. The familiar tingle ran up her spine.

"Want to go inside Mrs. Dixon?"


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

\- Kate -

It was a remarkably pretty day. The sun shone softly on the prison yard. It lit up the long, yellow grass giving it a golden quality. A gentle breeze rustled the leaves in the trees and mercifully carried the smell of rotting walkers away from the prison.

Kate sat Indian style in the grass with Judith babbling happily on her lap. The good weather brought everyone outside and a crowd had gathered to watch the impromptu game of baseball that had evolved from Carl and Patrick playing catch.

Glenn, a baseball cap at home on his head, approached the piece of plywood they were using as home plate. He mimicked the moves of a major leaguer, tapping the top of the bat against the base and with a big smile pointed it towards the imaginary center field fence. Rick laughed and lobbed the pitch over the plate. Glenn swung and the metal bat made contact with a familiar clunk. It was a well placed line drive, more luck on Glenn's part than skill, that sent Zach diving for the ball. It sped past him and he hit the ground with an 'oof'. The ball rolled into left field and Chloe ran forward to meet it. She sent it sailing towards Carl at second base as Glenn came barrelling towards him. Her throw was high and Carl had to jump to try for it. It missed the top of this glove by inches and went rolling towards right field. Glenn laughed and easily made it to third. Maggie cheered loudly. Tyreese picked up the discarded bat and headed up to the plate. The outfielders all took several steps back. Tyreese was the undisputed home run king of the prison.

"Strike him out Rick!" A woman yelled from somewhere behind Kate and she turned bewildered towards the voice, surprised to find Becky cheering loudly. Becky had come in with a small group that Daryl and Glenn had come across about a month ago and up until this point she had seemed to be a quiet addition to their community.

Kate laughed and gave Judith a jiggle, "Think Daddy can strike him out Judy?" and then whispered in the little girl's ear, "Probably not."

Rick threw the ball and Tyreese swung at the first pitch, hitting it high into the outfield. Sasha caught it easily to make the third out, obviously happy to be the one to shut down her big brother. Rick jogged over to Kate before his at bat, kneeling down and giving Judith a playful tickle.

"Kate, you sure you don't want to play today?" He asked, and with a grin added. "We could use a taller second baseman. I'm sure we could get someone to take her."

"We're ok." She said, kissing one of Judith's soft cheeks.

"I could take her Rick." Becky offered, making her way over to them with an overly friendly smile on her face. "I would love to get to know baby Judith."

"It's ok, really." Kate assured them. "I don't really feel like playing today. Rick's been working me too hard in the garden these days. I need the rest."

Rick laughed. "Thanks for offering Becky." He said, turning back to Kate, "And thanks for taking her."

"No problem. We haven't spent enough time together lately."

Rick nodded and walked back towards the field, clapping his hands as Carl headed to the plate for his at bat. "Let's go Carl!"

"Go brother!" Kate cheered for Judith, waving the baby's tiny arms in the air.

It was true that she hadn't been spending as much time with the little girl since she'd been working outside, but Judith wasn't the only reason she wasn't playing in the game. For the last few days she had been feeling under the weather. She had been having headaches again, getting dizzy and didn't seem to have the energy she normally did. At first she thought she might be getting sick, although since the fall she couldn't recall any of them having even a cold, but when the usual symptoms didn't follow she started to worry. She was concerned that she hadn't completely healed from her concussion, although it had been weeks. She worried what that could mean and if she let her mind ruminate on it for too long she frightened herself with all the possibilities. She had been avoiding talking to Dr. S, she didn't want to concern Daryl unnecessarily.

She looked across the grassy field where he was standing off to the side with Hershel and Michonne. They had asked him to play, but as usual he'd refused. His arms were folded over his chest and he shifted from foot to foot as the three of them discussed something. Hershel kept one eye on the game, knowing they always had him make the call when plays were close. As if he could feel her gaze, Daryl looked in her direction and caught her watching him. He gave her a small smile. The couple of weeks since they had been married had been some of her favorite days with Daryl. He seemed to have this peace about him, he was smiling more and although he was the same 'rough around the edges' man he'd always been, there was a confidence there. She wished she could take the credit for the change, and maybe she should've, but she figured most of it was due to the fact that things had seemed to calm down around the prison. Their community was growing, plans were flourishing and life was being lived. The last thing she wanted to do was to burst that bubble by having him worry for what might be no reason.

Becky interrupted her thoughts by plopping down next to her in the grass. She reached out and ruffled the little fuzz on top of Judith's head.

"Mind if I hold her?"

"No, go ahead." Kate said with a smile, handing the baby over to Becky. The woman held Judith facing her and in a high voice people tended to reserve for small, cute things she cooed, "You're so adorable! You look just like your Daddy."

Kate cringed inwardly, but managed to not allow her face to betray her thoughts. Kate was quite sure Judith was Shane's, biologically at least, but Becky didn't need to know the family business.

"You think so?" She asked.

"I sure do." She answered in baby talk, inches from Judith's chubby cheeks.

Kate stared out at the field as Zach attempted to give Beth some batting pointers. Maggie looked at Kate from her spot in the infeld, pointed at the couple and stuck her tongue out. Kate snorted.

"You and Maggie real close?" Becky asked.

"Ya. We are. Our whole group is pretty close. That happens I guess when you go through so much together."

Becky nodded. "Our group had lost so many by the time y'all found us. My husband died at the very beginning. I fled our town with my neighbors. Thought Atlanta would be safe."

"I was headed there too. I'm really sorry about your husband." Kate said, looking Becky in the eyes and seeing the sorrow there. The thought of losing Daryl crossed her mind and a lump formed in her throat.

"Thank you. I miss him a lot, but so many others have lost spouses, children, whole families. I don't feel alone in it, you know?"

Kate shook her head. She didn't know a single person who hadn't lost someone.

"Still…," Becky continued. "You're lucky to have Daryl. This world is much scarier alone."

"I am very lucky to have found Daryl." Kate agreed. "I remember how it felt to be alone, I came into this group not knowing a single person. Just sort of ended up following Rick, thank God."

"Rick's a good man. I can tell." Becky said, watching him as he stood waiting for his at bat. "Raising two kids alone in this mess. I can't imagine."

David was pitching and threw a fourth ball outside, sending Beth to first. Rick walked up to the plate. After a couple wide throws, he swung, sending a grounder past Maggie.

"WHOO HOO!" Becky yelled out. Kate smirked, but Judith startled and let out a wail. "Oh I am so sorry." Becky apologized, handing the baby back to Kate. "I didn't mean to scare her."

"Don't worry about it, I'll just walk around with her a bit to distract her. It was good talking to you Becky" Kate stood and headed towards Daryl. Judith, happy for the change in scenery, stopped her fussing.

"Enjoyin' the game?" Daryl asked, reaching out to take Judy in his arms. She reached up and pulled at his whiskers.

"Yes, it's been amusing. I think Rick has an admirer."

"Ya think?" Daryl said, annoyance passing across his face. "That girls drawin' walkers from miles away with her screeching."

Kate laughed and glanced towards the fences at the always present crowd of dead pawing at the perimeter.

"Carol's out there again." Daryl gestured with his head.

Kate followed his gaze and they watched as she disposed of one walker after another.

"Wasn't she on watch last night? She should try and get some sleep or at least try and relax. Enjoy the day with the rest of us."

Daryl shrugged and shook his head. "Guess she's tryin' to stay on top of it." He reasoned, but she could hear the concern in his voice. They both had noticed something had been a little off with Carol lately. While the rest of them were settling into a routine here, trying to build a permanent life within the walls, Carol's obsession with survival only grew. Kate understood staying prepared. The Governor proved that they would never be safe in this world, no matter how well protected they thought they were. But if they didn't try to live, actually _live_ , what was the point of surviving.

That night in the common room of C-Block, their smaller group gathered for dinner. With the community expanding and everyone going in different directions to fulfill their responsibilities, meals were normally taken when they could. Sometimes in the cafeteria, sometimes in the courtyard where tables and benches had been arranged around a BBQ spit and sometimes in the common room. But they gathered together, the eleven of them who were left, about once a week to have dinner as a family. It was important to all of them to maintain that bond. It wasn't just them. The Woodbury group still gathered among themselves, as well as the Decatur group and even the college kids. Everyone was trying to hold onto whatever sense of family they had, however tenuous. It was at one of these dinners that Hershel had announced, while Kate beamed and Daryl squirmed, that they had gotten married. Everyone had responded with such genuine love and support that even Daryl didn't mind the attention it drew.

This evening, as they'd finished their meal, Kate watched the group from her spot next to Daryl on the cement steps that led out to the yard. Carl stood acting out one of the plays from the game, while Beth moved around the tables gathering the plates. It was her night for dish duty and she was trying to get it done quickly so she could meet up with Zach. Zach hadn't been invited to one of their dinners yet, not because he wouldn't be welcome, but because Beth realized the significance it held and she just wasn't there with him yet. Maggie and Glenn sat close together laughing at Carl's animated reenactments. Glenn protesting when Carl insisted he got lucky when his line drive got underneath Zach.

"If Chloe hadn't overthrown it, I totally would have tagged you out at second!"

"Keep dreaming!" Glenn retorted.

Rick laughed, startling Judith who was nodding off to sleep in his arms. Michonne and Carol sat across from each other, deep in conversation. Carol making her point emphatically while Michonne nodded, her brows knitted together in concern.

Rick made his way over to the steps and he and Daryl began discussing their plans to snare some of the feral pigs they'd spotted about in the woods. Daryl had been working on a snare that could hold something that large and now they were hammering out the details of how they would go about trying it out. They knew they couldn't leave anything caught out there squealing for too long before the walkers would get to it, so they were planning on making a day out of it tomorrow.

The night wore on and the group went off in different directions. Beth headed out to meet up with Zach. Rick and Daryl left to do their typical perimeter check, neither of them comfortable enough to delegate that chore to anyone else. Kate headed towards their cell to get some reading in. Daryl returned about an hour later, he leaned his crossbow up in the corner and sat on their bed, kicking off his boots.

"You're up here early again." He remarked, laying down on the bed and turning his head to face her. She turned to her side, studying his face and resting her hand on his chest.

"Just tired."

"You ok?"

"I am." She smiled, slipping one of his buttons through its loop and moving to the next to convince him.

He let her undo them all, watching her as she pushed his shirt open and ran her fingers over his chest. He grabbed her hand with his and pulled it over her head as he rolled and positioned himself over her. He kissed her slowly and ran his hand down her side, her leg, before curling his rough fingers around the back of her naked knee and pushing it up towards her. She tugged his shirt off his shoulders, running her hands over the puckered skin of his back. He worked his mouth down her neck and she sighed.

The sound of knuckles rapping against their cell door interrupted them. They froze in silence, their eyes locked, hoping whoever it was would move on. Kate bit her lip to keep from laughing.

 _Knock knock._

"Daryl, are you in there?"

It was Carol. Daryl sighed, amusement fleeing his face.

"Ya. Whatta ya want?" He growled, still positioned over Kate who had knitted her brow in frustration.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Can it wait?" He replied, the irritation obvious in his voice.

"No, not really."

He looked at Kate, his expression matching the tone of his voice. He rolled off the bed, not bothering to put his shirt back on and moved to the curtain. He pulled it open a couple feet, but made no move to exit the cell. Kate watched from the bed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize you weren't dressed." She said. Kate thought she sounded a little uncomfortable at the discovery.

"Ya need something?"

"I just wanted to ask you how well you knew Zach. If you trusted him?"

"That's what you had to ask me? That's what couldn't wait?"

"He has watch tonight and Beth is up there with him and I'm afraid maybe they'll be too distracted to pay attention. I wasn't sure if he could be trusted with the responsibility."

"Why don't you go ask him yourself?"

"I did. They promised me that it wouldn't be a problem. But you know how those things can go."

Kate heard Daryl sigh. "Well they ain't the first ones up there that have more on their minds than staring into the dark all night."

"I suppose." She said with a clip in her voice. They both stood there silent for a moment before Carol finally said, "Ok, well, good night Daryl. Tell Kate I'm sorry for disturbing you guys."

"Night."

Daryl pulled the curtain shut and turned towards Kate, concern darkening his features. He got back on the bed.

The next day, with Daryl gone on a pig hunt with Rick, Kate found her way to the infirmary to talk to Dr. S. She had been debating whether or not to go when she saw him that morning in the cafeteria. He had agreed to look her over.

The infirmary looked just like any other exam room she'd ever been in. She was surprised the first time she had been inside it. She didn't know what she thought it would, or should, look like, but she definitely thought it would be different in a prison.

"So tell me again, Kate, what's been going on?"

"I'm worried about my head. I'm still getting dizzy and having headaches. I just don't feel like myself still, I don't have the energy that I did."

"Have you hit your head again? Any loss of consciousness? Memory loss?"

Kate shook her head no.

Dr. S. examined her thoroughly, checking her balance by having her stand on one foot with her eyes closed for 20 seconds, her coordination with a simple finger-to-nose test and her cognitive skills by asking her to repeat the days of the month backwards.

"I feel like you've pulled me over for drunk driving." She joked.

"Not completely different, actually." He smiled as he jotted a couple notes down on his clipboard. Kate smiled, doctors even had clipboards at the end of the world.

"Any other symptoms?"

"No."

"When was the last day of your cycle? Any chance you could be pregnant?"

"NO." Kate said a little too forcefully. The idea hadn't crossed her mind and even the suggestion made her feel panicky.

"No, you can't be pregnant? Ok. So when was the last day of your cycle? Are you pretty regular."

"I am. I mean, there were some months there before we found this place where we weren't eating much and I think I missed a couple back then. But its regular now and I'm sure I'm not late." She stumbled over her words quickly, trying to do the math in her head, but she felt put on the spot and it wasn't like she was staring at a calendar everyday.

"Are you and Daryl careful?"

Her face blossomed red. She could feel the heat rise up to her skin. She knew he was a doctor and this was all human nature, but she was still so embarrassed.

"Yes. We are." She said. "I'm not pregnant. I know I'm not."

"Ok. Ok." He said, chuckling. He wrote a couple more notes down on his paper. "Well, everything checks out and I really don't think you are having any repercussions from the concussion. Although it isn't unheard of to have symptoms for weeks after a bad one. I obviously don't have the advantage of an MRI or any more advanced technology than the tests I can do here in this office, but I think we'll just keep an eye on it and if you start experiencing any additional symptoms or if they get worse, please let me know and we'll figure it out."

She slid off the table, suddenly wanting to be far away from this room or Dr. S.

"Thank you so much for your help." She said.

"No problem Kate. I'm happy to help."

She scurried away, nearly slamming into Becky on her way out the door.

"Oh sorry Becky." She said, over her shoulder, fearing if she stopped she'd get stuck there talking to the two of them longer.

\- DARYL -

The sow was not happy with her new living arrangements and Daryl couldn't say he blamed her. One minute she was running free in the woods and the next she found herself caught in a snare and dragged back to live in a pen again. Rick and Daryl, on the other hand, were pleased that they had successfully managed to accomplish what they had set out to and even Daryl was wearing a wide grin. He stood in the middle of the pen, his gloves and pants covered with mud, and watched the pig tear around, running into the fence and trying to escape.

Excitement was hard to come by in the prison and any deviation from the everyday activities drew a crowd. The pen was surrounded by several people, curious about the new animal. Daryl was hoping that Kate would've heard that they were back and headed down, but she was nowhere to be seen.

Carl came down from the prison and stood next to his father alongside the crude structure that they had thrown together with chain link and wood pieces.

'Hey Carl," Daryl asked. "You see Kate around?"

Carl shook his head, but Becky, who was buzzing around Rick again, spoke up.

"I saw her earlier in the infirmary. She was talking to Dr. S."

Daryl looked confused, "Dr. S? What for?" He asked, wiping the sweat of his forehead with the back of his gloved hand and eyeing her with his typical Dixon scowl.

Becky shrugged and suddenly looked uncomfortable. "I'm not sure." She said. "She looked ok. Do you want me to go find her?"

Rick and Carl watched Daryl closely.

"Naw. I'll go up and check on her." He replied, already moving to climb over the fence. "You got this Rick?"

Rick nodded and climbed in. Daryl tugged his gloves off, stuffing them into his back pocket before heading up to the courtyard to wash up. His mind was racing, trying to think why she would be in the infirmary. It probably had nothing to do with her, she was probably helping someone else. Maybe one of the kids needed something or she had a question about Judith. Still, he would feel better when he could check in with her himself.

He walked into their cell and found her laying on their bed, her face buried in her pillow.

"Kate?" He called her name quietly.

She looked up at him, her face red and her eyes puffy. He moved quickly to the bed, pushing the hair that had stuck to her face back.

"What's wrong, darlin'?" He asked, terror grabbing hold of him, but trying to seem calm.

"I'm pregnant." She wailed.

He stood quickly. "What? How? Are you sure?" He paced back and forth in the small space that wasn't filled up with their bed and fought the instinct to run. She sat up, folding her legs underneath her and putting her face into her hands.

"I don't know. I don't know how it happened. I took a test." She gestured to a piece of white plastic sitting on the milk crate next to their bed. He eyed it, but didn't pick it up. He didn't know the first thing about those things and it felt like something he wanted to keep his distance from. A million thoughts were running through his head - all of them heavily distorted with absolute terror. He worried about Kate. He thought about Lori. He tried to picture himself with a child and couldn't. He thought of his father. He thought about the dead that surrounded their home. He thought about the fact that they lived in a prison. He thought of the Governor. He thought about how he had done this to her. He knew he should say something. Tell her it would be ok. Maybe he should lie and say he was happy. But she knew him too well and they'd talked about it. Neither of them wanted this.

"Are those things ever wrong? Did Dr. S say you were?" His voice didn't sound like his own. These weren't questions he should be asking.

"I haven't been feeling very well." She said, her voice thick. "I thought it was from the concussion. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to worry you."

He shot her a hurt look. He wanted her to be able to tell him anything.

She caught the look and faltered a little, but continued.

"He said I seemed fine and he asked if I could possibly be pregnant. I told him no. I was sure I couldn't be. But I started trying to figure things out, when I'd last had my period and I couldn't remember exactly..."

He turned towards the wall, and waved her off. Hoping she'd spare him these details. He could share his body with her, she could share her's with him, but he was still uncomfortable talking about this stuff.

"I asked Maggie if she had a test. I knew they'd had a scare before and wondered if maybe she had more. She did and I took it and I'm pregnant."

"So Maggie knows?"

"No, I mean, she knows I might be. I didn't tell her it was positive."

"How did this happen?" He asked again. "We were careful"

He sat on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands.

"I don't know. Things happen I guess. I'm so sorry."

He looked back at her. "Don't be sorry. I'm sorry. You don't have to be sorry for nothin'"

They laid in their bed as the light of day slipped away. They went round and round trying to make sense of it, trying to find a place where they could both be ok with it. Before she had fallen asleep she had told him she was scared. He had told her they would figure it out. That it would be ok. He hoped it made her feel better. He hoped she couldn't tell that he had never been so afraid in his entire life.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

 **Kate**

The cement floor of the cell felt like ice as Kate stood and dressed for the day. She had woken alone, but that wasn't unusual. It was a rare morning when she found Daryl next to her once the sun had risen. She wasn't sure where he'd headed this morning, but she wanted to find him.

The fear that griped her yesterday as she stared down at the little plastic window, with its two pink lines staring back at her like a death sentence, had somewhat abated. Everything looked better in the morning, at least that's what she'd heard. She hadn't been sure how Daryl would react, both of them having discussed what a terrible idea bringing a baby into this world would be. Part of her had thought for sure he'd head out the door the moment he heard and that if she was lucky he would wander out of the woods days later, sullen and withdrawn. Instead they wallowed in their fear together and as miserable as it had been, she was grateful.

She dragged the metal door open and headed into the gray, misty yard. The sun was hidden behind the clouds and provided no warmth. She spotted Daryl standing in the middle of the pen that had been built in hopes of having a pig to add to the prison. He stood with his fist resting on his hip, watching the large, pink animal snort about the dirt. Rick, Carl and Hershel stood at the fence and watched. Kate sidled up to the pen, exchanging a look with Daryl that was full of both uncertainty and understanding.

"Good morning Kate." Hershel greeted her with his usual warmth.

"Check her out." Rick said, gesturing to the animal.

"I can't believe you guys got one. How's she doing out here?"

"She's not too happy with us." Rick laughed.

As if she understood the pig grunted and pushed against the wooden boards that made up her new home.

"You haven't even heard the best part yet." Hershel said. "She's expecting. We'll have piglets here before we know it."

Kate felt her face go hot and she and Daryl exchanged a bashful glance. She was relieved when no one noticed and they carried on talking about the pig and the plans for her.

She stuck around for awhile, watching them tend to the animal. There wasn't much for any of them to do for it, it was more the novelty of having her at all that they were devoted to. Finally Hershel gave a contented sigh and announced he was going to head up to the prison.

"Let's get to work." Rick said to Carl, playfully swatting the boy on the back of the head with his work gloves. Carl ducked. "You coming Kate?" Rick asked.

"Ya. I've got a few things I need to do first, but I'll be out there soon."

He nodded with a smile and he and Carl headed towards the garden.

Daryl swung his leg over the short fence of the pen.

"What things you gotta to do?" He asked.

"I'm going to go talk to Dr. S. Let him know." She said.

Daryl nodded, but kept his eyes on the pig.

"Do you want to come with me?" She offered.

He looked up at her surprised. "What for?" He asked, as if the idea horrified him.

"You don't have to." She said, wounded. "I just thought you might have some questions."

"I don't."

"Ok." She said, shaking her head and crossing her arms over her chest. "Well, I'm going to head up there now. I guess I'll see you later?"

He grunted his response and with a sigh Kate turned and took a couple steps towards the prison.

"Hey." He called after her. She stopped and turned towards him again, a hint of anger flashing in her eyes.

"Come here."

She dropped her hands to her side and let out an annoyed breath before marching back towards him. With a gloved hand around her waist he pulled her towards him and kissed her.

Later that morning, Maggie found Kate in one of the corridors that connected the cell blocks to the center of the prison. Kate was headed back to C having just come from the infirmary where she had let Dr. S know she was, in fact, pregnant.

"Hey. I've been looking for you." Maggie said in her sweet, southern drawl, before lowering her voice.

"Well, did you take the test?"

Kate nodded slowly, raising her eyebrows and biting on her bottom lip.

"Oh God, you're pregnant." Maggie said, covering her mouth.

"I am." Kate said simply. "Just got back from telling Dr. S."

The two girls continued down the corridor, talking in hushed voices.

"How are you feeling about that?" Maggie asked, her voice full of pity.

Kate didn't want to be pitied. She understood why someone would feel that way, she had plenty of pity for herself in the situation, but somehow hearing it from someone else made her more afraid.

"I'm fine. Dr. S. was really encouraging. There is no reason to think that this isn't a good thing. We have a safe place to live. We have food growing. We even have a doctor." She ticked off all the positives that she'd been repeating over and over to herself since she'd found out last night. "Women have been having babies for centuries without hospitals. There is no reason I shouldn't be able to."

Maggie smiled without showing her teeth and shook her head encouragingly, but her eyes told a different story.

"Did ya tell Daryl?"

Kate nodded.

"How'd he react?" Maggie asked, wrinkling her nose. "Did he freak out?"

"He's ok. I guess. I mean, he didn't head to the woods." She forced a little laugh. "It'll take some getting used to for him I think. For both of us."

They heard voices coming down the corridor and both women stopped talking as a bearded man and his two young daughters rounded the corner and approached them.

"Hi, Ryan." Kate said, putting a smile on her face that didn't feel entirely authentic. She looked at the kids, "Hi Lizzie…" She narrowed her eyes and pursed her mouth in exaggerated concentration, "...and don't tell me, I'll remember…..Nikki, no Micah?,...Mika!"

The little girl's face broke out in a grin, "You remembered!"

"How are you three settling in?" Maggie asked their father.

"Real well. Thank you so much. For everything." He rested a hand on each of his girl's shoulders. "Everyone has been so nice and welcoming and I can't tell you what a relief it is to be in a place like this."

"We're glad to have you." Maggie replied. Kate shook her head in agreement and smiled at the girls.

"Kate, I remember you telling me that there was a library and even story time for the kids. I'm still feeling my way around this place, am I on the right track?" Ryan asked.

"Yes, you'll just keep going up this corridor and its on the left." Kate pointed over her shoulder. "Although I don't think Carol is in there. She is the one that does storytime, but I think it might be later today. Of course you guys can check it out on your own too."

"Ok. We will. Thank you again."

They smiled at Maggie and Kate and continued on their path. Kate was happy that their group had found the Samuels family. Those children deserved to be in a secure place where they could grow without fear. They had been through so much. It wasn't just Carl and Judith that were growing up motherless, Lizzie and Mika had lost their mother too and the thought was sobering. Kate quickly pushed the image of her own baby growing up without her away and let out a sigh. It was just one of the many things she had to worry about now.

Maggie followed her up to her cell and listened as Kate filled her in on all the things Dr. S had told her. She had promised herself she would be strong when she went in there to talk to him, but as soon as she brought up Lori everything came tumbling out in a tangle of words and tearful hiccups.

"Thank God we have him here." Maggie said, looking down and picking at a loose thread on the blanket that was thrown over Daryl and Kate's bed. "Not that my dad couldn't do it, but I'm glad there is more than one person here who actually has some experience with delivering babies."

Maggie twisted her mouth to one side and for a second Kate thought she was going to cry. She knew Maggie still had a hard time dealing with her part in Lori's doomed delivery and she felt guilty at opening the wound again.

She reached across the bed and grabbed her friend's hand. "Maggie, you had to do what Lori asked. What else could you have done? We would have lost them both."

"Ya, I know." Maggie said, her voice catching as she looked up at Kate and shook her head.

Daryl cleared his throat and they turned to see him standing in the doorway of the cell. She wondered how long he'd been there and how much he had heard. The last thing she wanted him to do was have Lori's pregnancy on his mind.

"Hey." Kate said a little too brightly. "I was just telling Maggie about my meeting with Dr. S. It went really well."

"Congratulations, by the way." Maggie piped in.

Daryl looked at them both uncomfortably and Kate was reminded of the man she first knew.

"I'm gonna go on that run today." He said without acknowledging Maggie and motioning with his head towards the yard. "They're leaving in a few minutes, wanted to let you know. Should be back before dark."

Kate furrowed her brow. "I thought Sasha had it handled." She wondered what had made Daryl decide to go all of a sudden .

"She does." He nodded in that jerky way he did, "Just seemed they could use another person is all. You gotta second?"

She stood, glancing back at Maggie sitting cross legged on the bed, and followed him outside of the cell door.

Daryl took a few steps down the cell row, and clueless as to why he wanted to talk to her she continued to rattle on about her discussion with the doctor, "While you're out today, could you keep your eye out for prenatal vitamins? Dr. S. mentioned that I should have you find some for me."

He rounded on her, "You told Maggie?" He growled in disbelief. His voice was raised, Kate was taken off guard and felt immediately defensive.

"Ya. I mean, Daryl, it was her test that I took, of course she was going to ask." She said, keeping her voice low. "I wasn't going to lie to her." She fumbled over her explanation, looking over her shoulder towards their cell, knowing Maggie could hear everything they said.

Daryl nodded angrily.

"Is that ok? Are you mad?"

"You tell anyone else?" He asked, pacing in front of her and sticking his thumb nail between his teeth.

"No, I mean, just Dr. S."

"Well don't go blabbin' it all over the prison, ok?"

It was just short of a snarl and Kate felt the sting of his words and stepped back.

"I just ain't ready yet." He said, his voice low and gruff.

"Ok, I won't." She said in a small voice, crossing her arms over her chest and hoping she wouldn't cry.

He nodded and walked past her towards the stairs.

"I'll see you tonight." He said without turning back towards her.

"Be careful" She called out as she watched him leave.

Kate had been working in the garden with Rick and Carl for several hours when they heard the group return. Rick and Carl dropped their shovels and sprinted towards the gate to open it up. Kate normally would have followed them over, making sure everyone made it back and happily greeting Daryl, but she stayed put, digging the head of her shovel into the dirt and using her boot to push it further into the soil. She kept her eye on the activity, watching each vehicle pull through the gate. Rick walked up to the driver's side of the truck where Sasha was behind the wheel. He always did that, checking in and seeing how it all went, if everyone was safe. After a brief exchange he stepped back and Sasha drove up the sloping gravel path to park the truck. Rick and Carl followed the group up on foot.

She watched with relief as Daryl got out of the passenger side of the vehicle, glancing in her direction as he pulled his crossbow out, no doubt wondering why she hadn't been there to welcome him back. Daryl started to help unload the supplies and she took the opportunity to sneak back up into the prison. She didn't want to talk to him. Not yet. She still felt bruised from his outburst this morning. She wasn't good at the silent treatment, it had never been her style, but she didn't even know how to explain to him why she felt the way she did. She didn't want to be pregnant, she was scared too, but the fact that he was so angry about other people finding out had really hurt her feelings. She thought his reluctance to tell the group came from a place of shame and she felt defensive, not just for herself, but for this baby. But when she pictured explaining that to Daryl she felt ridiculous. Maybe he was just having a bad day, maybe he was in a better mood now, but she wasn't.

She headed to the library and made her way down the rows of shelves. She realized a men's prison wasn't the best place to find information about pregnancy, but she was hoping to find a book on general medicine, mixed in with all the outdated computer programming and law books , that might have a chapter on the subject. She found what she was looking for and sat on the floor with her back against the rows of books. The book was thick, dusty and probably older than she was. She ran her finger down the index and turned to the short section on pregnancy. Some inmate had used a ballpoint pen to perversely alter the diagrams of a naked female form, and she laughed in spite of herself. She read through the symptoms of early pregnancy and about vaginal and cesarean deliveries before the book began listing all the possible complications pregnant women could encounter. Bleeding during pregnancy, hemorrhaging after delivery, diabetes and high blood pressure. Kate shut the book, held it to her chest and closed her eyes. This had been a bad idea. She was flooded with anxiety again and tears started to form. What had she gotten herself into?

"Kate? You ok?"

Startled, she opened her eyes to find Carol peeking her head around the shelf. Kate smiled and hoped it looked natural.

"Ya, I am. Just reading." Kate sniffed, her nose had started to run.

Carol glanced at the book and then at Kate with question in her eyes.

"You sure everything is alright?"

Kate pulled herself off the floor, "Yes. I'm fine, I promise."

Seeing the doubt in Carol's eyes, she shelved the book and added, "I just like reading up on some of this stuff, in case one of us ever needs it."

Kate could tell Carol wasn't convinced and they both stood there in an awkward silence as Kate wondered if Carol would go to Daryl with her concerns. Kate didn't care if she did. The door to the library opened and the room was filled with the happy chattering of children.

"It must be story time!" Kate said, brightening at the excuse to change the subject.

Carol gave her one last doubtful glance before they both moved to the main part of the library where they found Mika, Lizzie, Eryn and cute, curly haired Luke. Mika and Lizzie's father stood back a little, he seemed hesitant to leave the girls there and who could blame him. They hadn't been here long enough for him to let go of the fear that was a permanent part of life outside the walls. Kate hadn't shed it all herself and she had been here a lot longer.

The kids all greeted Carol warmly. She had obviously connected with them. Kate wondered if they reminded her of Sophia and how she felt about that. Carol didn't talk about Sophia often, none of them did. When Sophia died, in a way, Carol died too. The woman here now wasn't the woman Kate met back on the road to Atlanta. That woman wouldn't have lasted.

"Dad, you can go now." Lizzie said, rolling her eyes.

Kate laughed and Ryan, although clearly finding it difficult, waved at his daughters with a small smile and turned to go, his hands in his jeans pockets. Kate watched him as he left, amused at the exchange and thankful that the prison gave these kids a place they could be kids. She wondered what story Carol would choose, but the look on her face when Kate didn't leave made her realize she really didn't want her to stick around. Kate was sure if she stayed there wouldn't be a problem, but she knew this was Carol's thing and if she didn't want an audience Kate didn't have a problem with it. She waved quietly, the kids already sitting on the rug in front of an old trunk that Carol was perched on, and left the library.

Kate managed to dodge Daryl for the rest of the day. She felt childish about sneaking around the prison, but her anger made her selfish. Usually when she was mad, she would just talk to him about it. She always tried to keep in mind how new Daryl was at having any sort of normal relationship, how hard it was for him to discuss his feelings, but this time she wanted Daryl to come to her. Realize on his own why she was hurt.

She went to the common room at dinner time. She stuck the ladle into a big pot of canned stew and filled her bowl. She turned to head to the steps, where she and Daryl always sat, but decided against it. She wanted to make it painfully obvious to him that he was being avoided. So instead she chose a spot at one of the tables between Maggie and Beth. It was where she used to sit, before she and Daryl were together. As she slid onto the metal stool Maggie looked at her with raised eyebrows, but didn't say anything. The rest of the group trickled in and she pretended to pay attention as Beth chatted about Zach wanting to start going on runs with the group and how he planned to ask Daryl if he could go.

The metal gate leading to the yard rattled open and Kate turned to see Daryl walk in. He looked concerned when he didn't find her there on the step, but when he spotted her sitting at the table he met her eyes and she could tell he was pissed. He strode across the room, scooped up a bowl of stew and headed right back outside without a word to anyone.

* * *

 **Daryl**

He could still hear the sound of the axe falling to the ground, Judith's newborn cry echoing off the prison walls and Rick's desperate screams. "No, no, no." Of all the awful things that had happened to them since the fall, the hardest thing for him to watch was Rick break. It was gut-wrenching and frightening.

Last night, after Kate had told him she was pregnant, she fell asleep pressed up against him and he laid there for hours trying to sleep. Instead, his mind kept him up remembering in excruciating detail the day that Lori died. This morning he woke up and he just couldn't shake the feeling of dread.

Kate was upset. He knew it the second he'd asked her to keep the pregnancy a secret. Why he hadn't said something then, something to explain how he was feeling, he didn't know. Maybe it was because he knew it would turn into a whole conversation and Sasha's group would leave without him. He didn't know why he stalked off instead of at least giving her a real goodbye either, he didn't know why he did half the things he did.

He had just wanted to get out of the prison for the afternoon. Wanted to think of anything else for a few hours. What he didn't want was to come back and have the whole prison greeting him with the empty congratulations that Maggie had given him. But knowing Kate, that is exactly what would happen if he didn't ask her not to.

He'd gone on the run with Sasha and returned to find Kate clearly trying to avoid him. He was going to apologize, he was going to try to explain, he just hadn't gotten the chance. But when he found her sitting with Maggie and Beth, where she used to sit before him, any plan to apologize flew out the window. It hurt his feelings more than he wanted to admit. If space was what she wanted, that is what she would get.

Three days later and they had barely spoken.

He had found a way to leave the prison every day since. Yesterday he'd wandered the woods hunting for the better part of the day and spent more time than really necessary cleaning his kill.

He'd found her before he left, she was hanging laundry in the yard. He'd told her he was heading out to hunt. She was clipping one of his shirts onto the line and without a glance in his direction she mumbled 'Be careful', before bending down to take the next wet piece of clothing out of the basket at her feet. When he made his way up to their cell last night she was already in their bed, curled up under the blankets, facing the cold, cement wall. He'd whispered her name, but she never answered. He'd guessed she was asleep, but he didn't know for sure.

Today he'd asked Sasha if she wanted to get a group together again. They didn't usually head out again so soon after a run, but he had a feeling Sasha would be up for it and she was.

They loaded up the vehicles, supplies in case they got stuck, bins to hold anything they found. He liked going on runs with her. She was tough, she knew what she was doing and best of all, she didn't try and make small talk with him. If they talked at all it was usually about where they were headed, where they could go next.

She slammed the hatch down on the Hyundai, "Ready to go?"

"Ya. Give me a minute."

Daryl headed down the grassy slope to the garden where Kate was working along side Rick. She was on her knees in the dirt weeding around the growing plants. Daryl was practically standing over her before she noticed him approach. She gave him a wilting look before turning her attention back to the soil, wrapping her hands around a stubborn weed and yanking it out.

"I'm headed out again." He said without a hello.

"OK. Be careful."

He stood there for a second hoping she'd look at him, give him more of a response. Rick eyed them curiously before standing and walking off to the opposite side of the garden.

"You need anythin'?" He wasn't sure why he said it, just hoping for something more.

Her hands stilled and when she looked up at him, anger was twisting her features.

"I already told you what I needed. I'd ask someone else, but I'm not supposed to talk about it." She threw the pulled weed into a pile at her side and went to work on the next.

"Kate, please don't do this. I'm tryin' my best, give me a fuckin' break."

She acted like she hadn't heard him and with a frustrated sigh Daryl turned and headed back to the group waiting in the yard.

Sasha drove the truck North for about an hour towards a town that they hadn't searched before. Daryl sat silently in the passenger seat staring down at a map. It was covered with 'x's and notes scrawled in upper corners. They'd had it for a long time, since before the prison. It was how they kept track of where they had searched, or where they'd found herds.

"Do you mind pullin' off up here, there's a place I want to check out." Daryl said.

At Daryl's direction Sasha navigated the streets of a town that Daryl had been through before.

"What's here?" She asked, as she turned right down a deserted street littered with an assortment of strange items, overturned shopping carts, wildly parked cars and clothes scattered around.

"We were up here a few months ago. Came across this shoppin' center, had a Big Spot. The place was crawlin' with walkers so we didn't even pull in the lot. I'm just wonderin' if they've cleared out at all, figured maybe the walkers kept others out too. Could find a lot of shit there. It's just up here on the right."

Sasha pulled the truck into the sprawling parking lot of the large shopping center. There were several small stores and restaurants lining the strip mall, but in the middle was the Big Spot. Finding a location like this that hadn't been picked clean by other survivors would be like winning the lottery. Smack in front of the store, surrounded by a chain link fence, was an abandoned military post. In the first several days after the fall, it was common to see these popping up all over. At first they were a comforting sight to many who were desperately looking for a place to go or any sign that they government had control of the rapidly deteriorating situation. Merle and Daryl would rather die than go to a place like that for shelter, so into the woods they headed.

Eventually, like everything else, these posts failed too. This one was no exception and there were dozens of walkers shuffling around to prove it. Daryl jumped out of the truck and approached the fence, hoping to get a better idea of what they were up against. Immediately several walkers were snarling at him through the chain links.

He shook his head at Sasha and climbed back into the truck.

"There are too many of them, but we could figure out a way to get rid of them I bet the inside is untouched."

Sasha sighed. "You know how much stuff we could get in a place like that?"

"Gotta figure out a way to draw them out or kill them all."

They sat, lost in thought and staring at the building, before Sasha finally spoke.

"Ok. Let's take some time to come up with a plan. Do this right. For now, we'll head to the original destination. Search some neighborhoods."

Daryl nodded. "Whatever you say, boss."

Sasha shot him a look, but smiled in spite of herself. She put the truck in gear, pulling away from the fences and sticking her arm out the window to wave at the drivers in the two other vehicles to follow her.

They drove about another 40 minutes before Sasha came to the town they were looking for. She took a left into a tract of homes, making her way down the small street, eyeing each little cul-de-sac that branched off until they found one that looked like the best bet. She parked in front of the second house on the right and she and Daryl got out of the truck. With weapons ready they surveyed the neighborhood while the others parked and gathered for her instructions.

"Ok guys, you know the drill, so we are going to break into groups again and go through the houses here. You all know what sort of things we need, stay together, make sure you clear the houses before you do your search. Meet back here in half an hour."

The group broke apart, going in several different directions towards the houses.

Daryl and Sasha took the small, blue, two-story house on the corner. They cleared the downstairs and Sasha got to searching the kitchen, while Daryl went upstairs to clear and search the second story. He made his way through each room, not finding walkers in any of them. The final door at the end of the hallway was just slightly ajar and Daryl opened it slowly with his toe, crossbow aimed.

The room was pale blue and Daryl stopped in the doorway, dropping his crossbow to his side and staring at the white crib centered on the wall across from him. Above it hung wooden letters spelling out "WILLIAM" and there was a paper border that encircled the room that showed a blue and red train travelling down tracks, its cars full of toys. Daryl knew the room would be filled with things a baby would need. Things Judith could use now. Things they could use months down the line, but he couldn't bring himself to search the room. He didn't want to rifle through the drawers of tiny clothing, or stuff any baby blankets into his pack. It would make it too real for him. He eyed the big pink bottle of baby lotion on the top of the dresser and the wicker basket full of colorful, plastic toys in the corner and he felt overwhelmed with all the things he didn't know about. He backed out and shut the door.

They made their way through the tract, moving from one street to the next. It was a successful trip, they were filling their packs with useful items and because they weren't running into any issues they kept going.

"You in a hurry to get back? I don't want Kate pissed at me because we stayed out too long." Sasha said to Daryl, half kidding, as she emptied her bag into bins in the back of the truck.

Daryl was leaned up against the truck smoking a cigarette from a pack he found in one of the garages. He half snorted. "I ain't in no hurry."

That evening they pulled into the prison yard just as they were losing the light. They hadn't intended to stay out that long, but the road they took back was overrun and they had to backtrack and find a way in. Daryl took his time unloading the vehicles and talking with Rick and Sasha about their run, normally he would be in a rush to find Kate and let her know he was back, but what was the point. She was probably already asleep anyway or at least pretending to be. He stopped in the common room to grab something to eat before he headed up the stairs in C-Block.

He approached their cell and saw the glow of the lantern underneath the curtain, he pulled it back quietly and found Kate sitting on the edge of the bed waiting. She jumped up and threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him forcefully. He kissed her back, wondering why he had suddenly been forgiven. Her movements were frantic and her touches on the needy side. He was almost certain she'd been crying and for a second he thought he should slow it down, talk to her first and make sure she was ok, that they were ok, but he didn't have that kind of self control. He'd missed her too much. He untangled her from him just long enough to reach back and pull the crossbow over his head. He let it clatter to the ground and pulled her to him.

She whispered in his ear, "Daryl, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

But he didn't need an apology. This was enough, more than enough, it always had been.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

\- DARYL -

Kate shoved her bowl of instant oatmeal into Daryl's hands and scrambled out the metal door to the yard. He braced himself for what he knew would come next and sure enough he could hear her retching. He was afraid if he could hear her then everyone else in the common room could too. He dared to raise his eyes from his bowl and saw by the concerned looks the group was giving him that he wasn't wrong.

"Ew. Is someone barfing?" Carl asked, much louder than necessary. Sometimes Daryl wanted to knock the stupid hat off that kid's head.

For a second no one said anything. They just looked from the door that Kate had escaped from and back to him.

Carol finally spoke, concern creasing her features. "Is Kate ok?"

Daryl nodded. He hoped that would be enough, that they would go back to eating their breakfasts, but he doubted it.

"You wanna go check on her?" This time it was Rick.

"I'll go." Maggie said, shooting Daryl a disapproving look as she passed him on the cement steps and headed towards the sound Kate was still making. He looked back down at his oatmeal. It had been two weeks since Kate had told him she was pregnant and they still hadn't told anyone but Dr. S and Maggie. But a few days ago she had gone from just feeling nauseous to throwing up a few times a day and that sort of thing didn't go unnoticed when you lived in such close quarters.

Daryl rose from the steps, stacking Kate's bowl on top of his and crossed the small room to toss them into the wash bucket. He could feel all their eyes on him. He turned without a word or a glance, stooped to snag his crossbow and walked out of the room. As he was heading out he came across Kate and Maggie as they were headed back in. Maggie had her arm wrapped comfortingly around Kate's shoulders.

"You ok?" Daryl asked, stopping in front of them. Kate's eyes were watery and she looked tired. She wrinkled her nose. "I've been better." She leaned into him and closed her eyes. Daryl wrapped his arm around her waist and awkwardly rubbed her back in a lame attempt at showing her he cared. He tried his best to ignore Maggie's glare. He didn't exactly know what he had done to earn her wrath, but he was sure he was messing the whole thing up and so he didn't spend too much time trying to figure it out.

"I'm gonna go huntin'. I'll see you before dark." He said, prepared to counter her if she protested. Maggie crossed her arms and rolled her eyes.

"Ok. Be safe." Kate said. He expected anger or sadness, but resignation was all he got. He didn't know which was worse. He guessed she was used to him leaving since for the last two weeks he'd found every excuse to escape the prison. He would join any group going on a run, he'd organize runs if there weren't any planned and if nothing else he would hunt. The only day he'd remained within the gates of the prison was the day the pig gave birth to her piglets. He wasn't running away, not exactly. He still loved Kate more than he'd ever loved anyone or anything. He wanted to be with her. He wanted to keep her safe. But being there was a constant reminder that she was pregnant and he needed to think about anything else. He kissed the top of her head, pulled away from her and headed out into the yard.

Kate

"What do you want to tell everyone?" Maggie asked after Daryl had passed them in the corridor. "You know everyone is worried about you."

"I don't even care anymore." She was tired and defeated and it showed. "I don't know what Daryl expects me to say and it isn't like he's been around a whole lot to have to deal with it. They've all probably figured it out anyway."

Daryl seemed to want to pretend she wasn't having a baby. She thought at first that he would come to her when he figured out why she was so angry with him, but after days she feared all her stubbornness had done was push him further away. She was too afraid and missed him too badly to keep it up and when he wasn't back from his run that night she had feared the worst. She sat in their cell wondering why she would ever let him leave the gates without making it right between the two of them and promised herself that if he made it back she would never let it happen again. This life was too short and the outside world too dangerous for that sort of anger. When he finally walked into their cell she had already convinced herself of the worst and was so thankful that she let it all go, apologizing profusely. He'd apologized to her too. Told her he was sorry for how he had snapped at her for telling Maggie. He explained he just needed time to get used to the idea. But now, two weeks later, she was wondering just how long that would be. Their life continued as it had before, as if she weren't pregnant. She'd wake in the morning and either find him eating breakfast in the common room or doing his chores out in the yard. Afterwards, while she was in the garden with Rick, Daryl would come find her and let her know where he'd be running off to that day. His more frequent runs the only outside sign to their group that anything had changed. She figured they just chalked that up to Daryl's rambling ways. If she ever mentioned the baby, which wasn't often, he would give her short answers, clearly uncomfortable with the mere mention of it. There were only two ways in which he'd even acknowledged she was expecting. He brought her, after several reminders, the prenatal vitamins she'd asked for and they no longer used protection when they had sex. Other than that, it was like it wasn't happening. Except it was, and now that she was puking her guts up all over the place it seemed ridiculous to pretend it wasn't.

She and Maggie came back into the common room and Hershel was immediately at her side, Beth close behind him.

"Kate," Hershel started, a fatherly firmness in his voice. "I think you ought to think about taking it easy today, maybe go talk to Dr. S."

Beth, concern on her face, shook her head in agreement.

Maggie gave Kate a beseeching look and Kate shrugged in surrender.

"Daddy, Kate is havin' a baby." Maggie said, barely above a whisper.

Love and maybe a hint of sadness were added to the concern on Hershel's face. He embraced Kate and asked, "Honey, is this a good thing?"

She looked at him with tears in her eyes, "I want it to be."

"Well then, congratulations." He said with a smile. "How does Daryl feel about the news?"

Kate shrugged again. "He's taking some time getting used to the idea, I guess."

"He'll come around. I promise." Hershel said knowingly and Kate wondered how he could be so sure.

She smiled weakly and Hershel hugged her again.

Later that afternoon she was working in the garden with Carl and Rick. It was getting late in the day and Kate kept an eye on the woods, expecting to see Daryl wandering out at any moment. Carl walked over to where she and Rick were digging.

"Dad, can I please head up early today? I told Patrick I'd play chess with him."

"Chess? Since when do you play chess?" Rick asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at his son.

"I don't know. He's trying to teach me." He shrugged.

Rick looked at Kate, encouraged by his son's new interest. She raised her eyebrows and smiled at him.

"Fine. Make sure you wash up first and check in on your sister."

Carl dropped his shovel into the dirt and turned to run up to the prison.

"Hey, Carl." Rick called after him. "I think you dropped something."

Carl groaned and turned around, grabbing the shovel and returning it to the shed beside the pig pen.

With Carl gone, Kate and Rick worked in silence, Kate looking up towards the woods every few minutes and trying to work up the courage to ask Rick the question she'd been dying to ask him since the moment she knew she was having a baby.

"Rick, when you first found out that Lori was pregnant with Judith, how did you feel about it?"

Rick stopped what he was doing and sat back on his boots. As she watched the dawn of realization spread across his face she couldn't help but laugh.

"Does this have something to do with how you've been feelin' lately?" He asked with a smile.

"Maybe."

He shook his head and she could see his mind working, connecting all the dots from the last couple weeks.

"Well, I'm not sure if Judith is the best example." He said, picking his spade back up and stabbing the dirt with it uselessly. "That situation was a little...," He paused searching for the best word. "Complicated."

He said it without a hint of bitterness, although Kate knew it couldn't be an easy thing for him to admit.

"But I'll tell you about when I first found out that Lori was pregnant with Carl."

"Ok." She agreed, happy to be able to get his perspective at all.

"Lori and I, we got married real young. I was just starting out at the Sheriff's Department and we didn't have much money. I was always stressed out and we fought a lot back then."

He laughed, finding the irony in his statement. "I guess that doesn't seem real surprising, but I promise there was a good stretch in our marriage where we were really happy."

Kate nodded. She knew they had loved each other.

"Anyway," He started again, looking up at the prison towards where Carl had just disappeared. "I come home one day and she tells me she's pregnant and she's already gone out and bought all these baby clothes. She's holding up these little outfits with Pooh Bear and Mickey Mouse on them and all I can think to say is, 'How much did all of these cost?'"

"That was the first thing you said to her after she told you she was pregnant?"

He shook his head.

"Yikes! Rick, that's terrible"

"Ya. Yikes." He laughed again. "Hey, I'm not proud of it. My point is, here Lori had just found out and she was already picturing this little person that was going to wear these miniature clothes. I couldn't picture that tiny person yet, all I could do was wonder how we were going to make it work. It's different for women than it is for men, and don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I should've reacted like that, but sometimes it takes a little time for us to get it through our tough skulls."

Kate shook her head appreciatively. "And look at you now, you're a great dad."

His face darkened a little. "Well I don't know about that. I try my best."

"You are Rick." She said, hoping that he believed her, she definitely meant it.

"So, is it safe to assume Daryl isn't thrilled about the news?"

She looked towards the woods again, knitted her eyebrows and took a deep breath. "He doesn't really talk about it at all. I know he's worried about me."

"Cause of Lori." Rick added.

She looked at Rick apologetically. He just nodded.

"I think sometimes we forget how far Daryl has come." Rick said. "Can you picture the Daryl back at camp, the Daryl who pulled a knife on me the first time we met, as a husband? A father?"

She smirked. On one hand, she could. That was, after all, the same man she loved now. But she also knew what Rick meant, because the girl she was back at camp wasn't someone she could picture being married to that guy that Shane had in a choke hold.

"I do forget sometimes." She agreed.

"On the day Carl was born you couldn't have found a happier man than I was. It'll be the same for Daryl, just you wait."

Daryl

Daryl returned from the hunt with two rabbits. Not as good as the deer he'd brought in two days ago, but it was better than squirrel. His personal crisis was certainly keeping the people of the prison well fed. He was skinning and cleaning them when Sasha wandered up to the table.

"That's disgusting." She said, looking down at the gutted rabbit.

"Don't hear you complainin' much when you're eatin'."

Sasha shrugged.

"How many days you think we need to leave that boom box at the Big Spot before we go back and check on it?" She asked, still eyeing the bloody carcasses with revulsion.

Daryl had moved onto the second rabbit and was pulling the skin down off its leg.

"How many days has it been? Three?"

"Two. Think we could get a group together? Head back over tomorrow?"

"Don't see why not."

"I'll see who I can get for the run."

Daryl grunted a response as she headed away. He finished up with the rabbits, dropped them off at the BBQ spit where it seemed meals were being prepared all day and headed to the showers.

That night he and Kate ate dinner out on the picnic benches. They weren't alone, there were always people around these days, but no one was paying them any attention. He was glad their community was growing, strength in numbers and all, not to mention that it just felt more normal, but sometimes he missed when it was just their group. The rest of these people, they were good, but he still wasn't at ease with them and it was strange to him how they acted. In someway it seemed they were intimidated by him, but not for the reasons people had been before. He didn't know how to act.

Kate interrupted his thoughts.

"I told Hershel and Beth. About the baby. Rick knows too." She said it quick and matter-of-fact, like pulling off a bandaid. It was almost like she was daring him to be angry, or maybe just assuming he would be. He looked at her, probably for the first time since they'd sat down to eat and he could see that there was some fear in her eyes and he felt like a dick.

He shrugged. "A'right."

"That's it? You aren't mad?"

"Figured once you started pukin' it was just a matter of time anyway."

"So it's fine with you if people know then?"

He nodded. He didn't love the idea, but it was kind of unavoidable. She changed the subject, knowing when she was ahead.

"Where you headed tomorrow?"

"Gonna take a group back out to the Big Spot I was tellin' you about. See if the walkers have cleared out. Should be able to get a lot there. Probably have to take a few trips."

"I want to go."

He narrowed his eyes at her.

"You definitely ain't goin'."

"Why not?" That defiance that drove him nuts in more ways than one lighting up her eyes.

"I wouldn't have wanted you to go before, but definitely not now. Not now that you have a …." He paused, almost like he couldn't get the word out and gestured at where her midsection was hidden under the table before he managed to spit out the word 'baby'. It was the first time he'd said it outloud and it felt weird in his mouth.

For the second time that day he prepared himself for the protest he was sure would come, but once again she surprised him. She just smiled.

"What are you smilin' for?" He asked, suspicious.

"I love you Daryl."

"You must."

The next morning Daryl was anxious to get on the road to The Big Spot. If all went as expected, they could have a big pay off and that always made for a good day. He had hoped they would be taking a bigger group out there, he wanted to get as much as they could before another group had the chance to come across the spot and pick it clean, but that morning Carol pointed out the build up of walkers at the fence. They needed as many people as possible working on taking the walkers down or they wouldn't be able to stay on top of the growing problem. He got the impression Carol thought they should postpone the whole trip, but Daryl wasn't going to risk losing their chance at the store.

In the end it was Sasha, Tyreese, Glenn, Zach and a guy they brought into the group last week named Bob. Daryl tried to convince Rick to join them at the last minute, but he made some excuse about checking snares. He knew Rick had lost his taste for the world outside of the prison, but he worried he'd get soft staying inside and farming all his days. He couldn't force the guy though and Michonne, who had just arrived back from her latest search for the Governor, quickly volunteered to go. Daryl was relieved to have her along, there was a lot of inexperience in this group and she was a welcomed asset.

For the last couple weeks every time he left the prison he could feel a weight come off his shoulders. It was easier to pretend out here that nothing had changed. Maybe it was because he had to concentrate on his surroundings, maybe it was because when the woods swallowed him up if felt like it had his whole life. But today, as they sped away from the prison gates he waited for the relief to come and it never did. Instead he suddenly felt like he belonged at home with Kate.

Kate

Kate climbed the steps to the top of C block as quick as she could. She'd been in Cell Block E, standing in the doorway of Chloe's cell and chatting about something inconsequential when David and Gabe came in. As they approached she could tell something was wrong and the air left her lungs.

"The group just got back." David said. "They lost someone, that kid Zach. Sounded like it was bad."

When she had heard Zach's name, she found her breath knowing Daryl had returned. She was ashamed to admit that there was relief mixed in with the horror she felt. Then she thought of Beth and her heart hurt even more. She bolted out of E and headed towards C, trying to decide whether to find Beth or Daryl first. At twilight, Cell Block C was almost dark except for an almost eerie blue light that was just enough to allow her to find her way without the aid of a flashlight. As she headed towards Beth's cell on the ground floor she could hear Maggie's voice soothing her sister and she decided to look for Daryl instead.

Kate found him in their cell, sitting on the edge of their bed as the darkness descended, his elbows resting on his knees, his head in his hands. She didn't need to see him like that to know that Daryl would be taking Zach's death hard. A loss in the group affected everyone and when other people were crying or teetering on giving up, Daryl was always the one stepping up. He was the one that kept looking for Sophia, he was the one that immediately went looking for formula for Judith. Before he was her's, she had no way of knowing how difficult it was for him, it was something he kept hidden from them all. It wasn't until after Merle, after he'd allowed her to see him vulnerable, that she saw how the losses really hit him.

Daryl didn't know Zach well, although he must have liked him since he put up with his annoying questions, but she knew he would feel responsible, he always did in some way. She walked into the cell and towards him. Without raising his head Daryl mumbled, "D'ja hear 'bout Zach?"

"Ya." She said with a sigh as she sat next to him on their bed. She rested her hand at the top of his back, just above the wings on his vest, before running her fingers up the nape of his neck and into his shaggy hair. She pulled gently at the greasy strands before rubbing at the muscles in his neck. He let out an appreciative groan. He sat up and leaned back towards her, she placed her hands on either side of his face, pinning his hair to his ears, and kissed his mouth. Not a passionate kiss, but a kiss that was meant to remind him that they were both still here. She wrapped her arms about his shoulders and he pulled her tightly to him, burying his face deeply into her neck.

"It was bad, we are lucky any of us got out." He said into her skin before pulling away and resting his elbows on his knees again. Kate slid off the bed and kneeled in front of him, working on untying his boots as she listened to him relive the horrors of the day.

"The spot was ready, just like we'd hoped the walkers had all cleared out. There were a couple in the store that we had to take care of, but that wasn't a problem. We cleared the store, all seven of us were working our way through, fillin' baskets full of shit. I hear this crash and I go runnin' over and this shelf of booze or wine or somethin' has come down on Bob. He's stuck, but he ain't cut or nothin'. Tyreese and Zach come over and we are tryin' to lift it off him, but before we can a walker comes fallin' through the ceiling. 'Cept he don't fall all the way, he's just hangin' there by his guts, swingin' around. And we're all just starin' at it, just frozen. The rest of them run over and I remember Glenn sayin' we needed to get out of there. But Bob was still stuck and before we can do nothin' about it walkers are just droppin' through the ceiling and landin' all around us. Total chaos. I'm hearin' screams, gun shots, walkers keep fallin'. I have no idea if anyone has been bit, if anyone is dead, where everyone is in the store. I'm tryin' to kill them, we all are. I don't get a chance to reload, I'm smashin' them with the bow left and right."

At that Kate turned her head to look at his weapon propped up in its corner of their cell and saw he hadn't bothered to clean it off yet. She finished with his boots and returned to the bed, working his vest off his taut shoulders.

"I pull my gun, I got several on me, there is this display of beer cases in the middle of an aisle and I'm on top of it, tryin' to get some space between me and the walkers. See if I can fight them off. I look up, don't know why, don't know if I heard somethin' or was makin' sure a walker wasn't gonna fall on me and there's a fuckin' helicopter just ready to come crashin' through the roof. Glenn runs over, handles the walkers around me. Bob is screamin' his head off and I look over and he's got his hand pushin' as hard as he can against this walker's face as it's tryin' to get at him. Zach runs over and shoots the fucker in the head and lifts the shelf off Bob who scrambles out. Saved his life. We all start to run, but Zach gets grabbed and goes down screamin' and the thing works it's way to his face."

Despite the tears in her eyes, Kate continued to work at his buttons, peeling off the layers he'd dressed in until there was just one shirt left. Daryl took a deep breath.

"Were you able to bring him back?" Kate asked, afraid of the answer.

Daryl shook his head, his face barely discernible in the remains of the light.

"Helicopter came crashin' down. We ran."

Kate stood up, trying not to picture Zach as a walker, and gathered his clothes, hanging them on a row of hooks below the shelves. She made her way back to the bed. Daryl was lying on his back, forearm across his forehead and staring towards the ceiling. She climbed over him and nestled into his side. He took her hand in his, tangling their fingers together and laid it on his chest. She could feel his heart beating through the thin cotton of his shirt.

"I think I'm gonna stick closer to home for awhile. I don't need to keep goin' out so much." He planted a kiss on the top of her head and she kissed his chest. She wanted to tell him how grateful that made her feel, but it didn't seem like the right thing to do, she knew it wasn't about her.

C Block grew quiet. Hershel and Rick's hushed conversation faded away and she heard the gate to the outside roll open and slam shut again and knew Maggie and Glenn were probably on their way out to the guard tower for their watch. Daryl's body relaxed and the deep, consistent breath of sleep quickly followed. She raised their hands, still entwined, to her lips and kissed his fingers. She laid awake for a while, relishing the feeling of warmth and safety even more on a day that ended in so much sorrow.

She had no way of knowing that it was the last night they would spend together in the cell that had become their home.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

It was early morning, much earlier than Kate was used to waking. She could tell because the cell was light enough to just make out the shadows of their tiny home. The curtains hung motionless in the doorway, their blue and yellow flowers only shades of gray in the dim light. The cell block was rarely so quiet, at least not with the hours she kept, and she strained to hear the sounds of life. She thought she could make out the shuffle of feet on the cement floor downstairs and maybe even a sweet coo from Judith. Daryl's breath was warm on her neck and the weight of his hand heavy on her ribs as he anchored her to him even in sleep. She considered the day ahead of her and thought of the cucumber beds and the possibility of helping out at the fences now that the clusters were getting harder to manage. Her stomach growled and gave the slightest of lurches, reminding her of the life growing inside of her and its determination to leave her feeling perpetually under the weather. Slowly she extricated herself from Daryl's side, hoping he would continue to sleep. She leaned over his body, careful not to jostle him, and grabbed the package of crackers off the upturned crate next to their bed, settling back on the blankets with her legs tucked underneath her. The seeping sun slowly illuminated the room and her eye caught the crossbow propped up in its spot in the corner, still covered in blood, the remnants of yesterday's ill-fated run. A memory of Zach on the day of their picnic flooded her mind, how he made such an effort to get to know them all with his easy, carefree manner and the way he got under Daryl's skin with his questions. The world was so cruel and undiscerning in the lives that it robbed them of. Her eyes travelled to Daryl's face and even in his restful state he didn't look at peace. The pillow caused the skin under his eyes to bunch, drawing attention to the dark circles that permanently resided there. He looked weary and older somehow and she worried about how hard he worked. Her stomach turned again and she unwrapped the crackers as quietly as possible and stuffed the first one into her mouth, trying her best to chew it silently.

"You're gettin' crumbs in our bed again." Daryl said without opening his eyes. His voice deep and even zzraspier in the morning.

"Carol said if I eat them when I first wake up it can help me not feel so sick." She explained around a mouthful of stale Saltine.

Daryl rolled on his back with a groan, bringing his arm to rest on the pillow above his head, and watched her through half closed eyes. He was still wearing the black long sleeved shirt she'd left him in last night, but she could make out the curve of his bicep through the thin material. She shoved another cracker in her mouth and wished he wasn't wearing a shirt at all. Her eyes drifted down to his chest where the top buttons were undone and then to his throat where she could see his skin jump slightly with every beat of his heart.

Motivated by the sudden desire she had to see his bare skin, she abandoned the crackers and got up on her knees, inching her way across the small space of mattress that laid between them. Daryl reached out his arm and clamped his hand on her hip. She could feel his strong fingers dig into her muscle through the cotton of her shorts as he curled them around to her backside. He let out a noise, somewhere between a growl and a grunt and tugged at the side of her shorts with a hopeful look. She laughed, happy to oblige, and laid down next to him, raising her hips and pulling her shorts and underwear off in one movement before tossing them across the cell where they fell onto the cement floor in a pool of pink and white stripes. Turning into him, she pressed her naked hips against his side and hooked her leg over his. He snaked his left arm around her head, letting his fingers tousle her hair and looking at her face with nothing short of adoration before using his forearm to pull her towards him. He kissed her slow with an excruciating tenderness that made her feel frantic and like a puddle at the same time.

The sounds of C Block waking up for the morning distracted them momentarily. Carl's alarm started jingling from downstairs and she heard Rick's voice, although she couldn't make out the words. She laughed again, this time against his mouth. They'd gotten used to having sex in such close quarters, but it was always a little unsettling when you were reminded how easily sound travelled.

She worked on the rest of his buttons, pushing the sides of his shirt open and running her hand from the lowest part of his belly, over his firm chest, letting her fingers tangle lightly in the hair that was scattered over his skin. He shivered underneath her touch, breaking out in goosebumps, and reached down to still her hand. She smiled up at him devilishly. She freed her hand and reached up to grip one of his impossibly broad shoulders, using it to pull herself up onto him.

"Good morning." She whispered with a smile, pushing his hair out of his face.

"Mornin'. You're up early."

She shrugged, kissing him again and letting her lips trail back down his neck, his chest and his stomach. She rose up on her knees, resting between his legs, and pulled her t-shirt over her head, throwing it across the cell where it managed to snag itself on one of the hooks on the wall. She raised her arms in the air in a naked display of victory and Daryl let out a short chuckle, more of a gasp than a laugh, as he eyed her. He sat up, reaching for her face, her hair tangling in his fingers as he pulled her towards him to kiss her mouth. She wrapped her legs around his waist and deepened the kiss as he ran his hands down her bare back and up her arms before laying a thick hand on each side of her neck and just brushing her collarbone with his rough thumbs.

She reached down and unbuttoned his battered black pants.

"I got it." He whispered hoarsely, as she moved to let him off the bed. He stood, and Kate laid back, propped up on her elbows, feet planted on the mattress, swinging her knees teasingly back and forth in the air. She was in a playful mood. It was the first time she had felt so lively since she'd found out she was pregnant and Daryl was going right along with it. She hadn't realized how badly she had missed it until this very moment.

He shrugged out of his shirt and kicked off his pants, looming over her, his pupils so wide they made his blue eyes dark. A laugh, made of desire and nerves bubbled out of her, the sight of him intimidating still after all these months. His face broke into a self-conscious grin.

"What?"

She just shook her head looking up at him, not even being able to come close to forming words that would describe how she felt.

He climbed back onto the bed, hovering just inches over her, suspended by his forearms planted on either side of her head. She could feel the heat coming off his body and the tickle of his chest hair on her bare skin and he was suddenly looking at her with such intensity that she had to force the giggle that was threatening to erupt back down.

"I'm glad you're back." She whispered, relieved that he had decided to stop heading out every morning, but thinking more about the dark cloud that seemed to have lifted off of them.

"No place else more important for me to be right now." He said, swallowing hard. "My family needs me here."

Rick, Carl and Michonne were just heading out to the yard when Daryl and Kate made their way to the common room, exchanging looks Maggie would have called them out on if she hadn't been, at that very moment having a similar exchange with Glenn in the tower. Michonne paused at the door to the yard as she watched them walk into the room.

"Heading out to Macon." She said, watching Daryl's face closely. "Thought I'd give it a try."

Daryl came to a stop and eyed her, his face dark with concern. "You sure?"

"I am." She said, setting her jaw determinedly, a sharp contrast to the doubt in her eyes.

Kate knew Michonne felt compelled to keep searching for the Governor, but everyone wished she'd stay home.

Daryl gave a jerky nod, pressing his lips into a thin line and accepting that her mind was made up. "Watch yourself out there."

Michonne looked at him, her face softening and for a second Kate thought she might be swayed, but she turned and followed Carl and Rick out to the yard.

Kate carried two bowls of dry cereal to one of the tables and Daryl slid in next to her, taking one from her hand and propping his elbows up on the scratched metallic surface.

"Don't know why she's gotta keep headin' out." He said, digging his fingers into the flakes. "She ain't gonna find him."

Kate knew there was a part of Daryl that felt guilty for letting her go on her own. Another burden he insisted on carrying.

"She's got to figure it out on her own Daryl. For whatever reason she wants to be out there."

"Governors an excuse, she's just runnin'."

Kate gave him a sympathetic look. "Sometimes running is just another way to hide. You of all people should get that."

He looked up from his bowl and she immediately felt bad for saying anything. There was guilt there in his eyes, but hurt too.

She took his hand in an attempt to soften her meaning, afraid she could send him back to that place they seemed to have just escaped.

"I shouldn't have said that."

"It's ok. I deserve it."

The door to the tombs swung open and Hershel made his way into the common room, a flashlight in one hand and a book under his arm. He'd been making a habit of spending his sleepless mornings in the library and Kate realized she wasn't the only one who had been

awake before the sun was up.

"Good morning" Hershel said. "How are you feeling today, Kate?" He patted her on the shoulder as he passed.

"Not too bad. I think Carol is on to something with the crackers first thing in the morning."

"Good, I'm glad to hear it." He moved slowly, limping noticeably on his prosthetic leg, towards the cell block where they could hear Beth singing to Judith.

"Maybe it wasn't those crackers got you feelin' so good this mornin'" Daryl said under his breath, giving her thigh a squeeze under the table. Kate swatted at this arm, her face going red, but happy to see her comment about running hadn't left him in a sour mood.

"What are you two smiling about?" Sasha asked as she crossed the common room, eyeing them suspiciously as she poured coffee into a tin mug and handed it to her brother before pouring a second cup for herself. Daryl pulled his arm back onto the table and concentrated on eating his cereal.

Tyreese took a spot next to Kate, his smile somehow always arriving before he did.

"Hey Kate, I was going to talk to Rick, but maybe you know. I was wondering if maybe…"

Whatever Tyreese was going to say was cut short by the blast of gunfire, deep and booming, followed immediately by another. Before Kate even realized what was happening, Daryl was to his feet, crossbow in his hands. Sasha moved quickly to the gate to the toombs.

"Sasha, lock that gate." Daryl barked.

Hershel and Beth appeared at the door from the cell block.

"Walkers?" Sasha suggested, eyes wide. "Think they got in from the back somehow?"

"I was just there." Hershel shouted. "I didn't see or hear a thing."

"It sounded like it came from D." Daryl said, already at the door to the courtyard, Sasha and Tyreese at his heels. "Hershel, stand guard. Kate, you get inside the block with Beth. Lock yourselves in."

Beth, Judith on a hip, opened the barred gate to let Kate into 'C Block' and Hershel made his way to the gate. Daryl disappeared into the yard. More shots rang out and they could hear shouting and screaming. Kate wrapped her hands around the cold metal bars and prayed silently. Her heart was pounding so hard she could hear it in her ears.

"What do you think it is?" Beth asked, desperation in her voice, clinging onto a whimpering Judith and absentmindedly patting her back. "Walkers?"

"Ya. Probably. I don't know." Kate tried to think of all the threats they had faced since they'd been here.

"Could be an outside attack." Hershel suggested. "Do you girls have your guns?"

"Good idea." Beth said, heading to her cell for her's. Kate turned quickly from the gate and made her way up to the cell to grab her weapon.

Ever since she'd been farming with Rick, Kate had tried to honor his determination to only carry knives. She knew he didn't expect her to, but she always felt safe enough within the gates, and if it helped set a good example for Carl she was all for it. It drove Daryl nuts. Now she realized it was probably foolish.

It seemed like forever before the door clanged open and Maggie and Carl helped a hobbling Michonne into the common room. Hershel had long ago left to investigate further and Kate was starting to panic.

"Hello?" Maggie called out into the empty common room.

Beth and Kate, who had taken Judy into Beth's cell, flew to the gate at the sound of a familiar voice, unlocking it and peppering questions at the trio.

"What's going on?"

"Michonne, are you alright?"

"Is everyone ok?!"

Maggie and Carl lowered Michonne down on one of the stools at the table. Maggie turned towards them, her face white and eyes troubled.

"Rick said it was Patrick, he got sick and died. He turned and attacked the cell block." She explained.

"Oh, not Patrick." Kate said, the all too familiar ache squeezing at her heart. "How many? Who? Is Daryl ok? Glenn?"

"Did you see Dad?" Beth asked. "He went out there a few minutes after the rest of them did."

"They're fine. Rick said they're still in there, but they're ok I guess." Maggie explained. "He said we lost a lot of people though."

"Sickness? What kind of sickness?" Beth asked.

"I think he said some sort of flu. Rick had to head back in. The rest of us are supposed to stay away from anyone that was in there." Michonne explained.

"What? Why?" Kate asked, her voice high and panicked.

"They might be contagious."

\- DARYL -

Dary threw a shovelful of dirt onto the growing pile and eyed the body lying on the ground at the mouth of the grave. It was wrapped tightly in a sheet, a stain where blood had seeped through the material from a head wound that insured she wouldn't rise again.

Her name was Jenny and he was surprised he could even recall that much, but he was sorry they couldn't save her. Her's was the first of a dozen graves. He prayed there wouldn't be more, that whatever had caused Patrick and Charlie to die so quickly in the night, would spare the rest of them. But he knew they usually weren't that lucky.

His breathing was stifled from the handkerchief that covered his mouth and nose and he could feel the blisters start to raise on his already calloused hands, but stopping wasn't an option. These people deserved to be put to rest and besides, it was when he had nothing to do that his thoughts got the best of him and the horrificness of the situation threatened to overwhelm. He didn't have that luxury.

"Hey."

He had just dug the head of the shovel into the brown earth when her voice, always a welcome sound to him, pulled him out of his thoughts.

He turned around, leaning on his shovel but making no move to climb out of the grave.

"Don't get too close."

"I know." She said, planting herself about four feet from the half dug hole and looking down where he stood knee deep in the dirt. "I thought you could use a drink."

She held up a battered water bottle, its label having long ago fallen off after multiple washes. He held out his hand and she tossed it down to him. He caught it easily and unscrewed the top, yanking the handkerchief down and bringing the bottle to his lips, taking a long draw of tepid water.

"Who is that?" She asked, motioning with her head to the body, her arms crossed tightly over her chest.

"Jenny. From the college group." He squinted up at her. "You know her very well?"

"I knew them all." Kate said, a thickness in her voice that let him know she'd been crying.

He nodded and took another drink.

"She was from Memphis and going to school in Atlanta. She had a boyfriend, but he died a few weeks before you guys brought them in. She was quiet, liked to draw. She was the one that got the kids working on crafts." Kate paused, looking back down at Daryl, her eyes narrowing with concern. "Are you ok?"

"I want you to stay in our cell block as much as possible. Or out in fresh air. We don't know who else could have this. Keep your distance from everyone."

"Daryl, I was just with Patrick yesterday. I ate dinner at the same table with him. He was right across from me. If I'm going to get it..."

This revelation made him uneasy, he cut her off. "Still, we ain't takin' any chances. I'm gonna sleep in the guard tower tonight. I feel fine, but just to be safe."

"Okay." She shook her head. "I'm going to go over to the shed and grab another shovel. I think Maggie and Glenn are gonna head down here too and help."

"No. I got it. You don't need to be around the bodies"

"Daryl, I'm not gonna stand around and watch you work yourself into one of these graves. We all want to help. I'll wear a mask, I won't handle the bodies. I'm pregnant, not disabled."

Daryl nodded and watched her walk off and the fear of losing her gripped him again. Today's losses were heavy, but it could've been so much worse. They'd let themselves believe that they were safe, that the threat was contained outside of these fences. Fences that at this very moment were weakening as the dead continued to pile up against them. They had elderly people living here, did they think they were going to live forever? If any of them died in their sleep it would have been the same thing. At any time someone could slip in the shower and hit their head, choke on something, have a heart attack. They all just slept in their cells, vulnerable, with their doors wide open. The thought that it could have just as easily been them, been Kate, was frightening. And now Karen and David were sick, Tyreese could be next, any of them could be next.

\- Kate -

Rick kept discouraging them from naming the pigs, but she and Carl did it anyway. Violet had been her idea, it felt weird just calling her 'the pig'. Kate had come across a copy of "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" in the library and watching the pig chomp her food reminded her of the little gum chewing girl in the story. Once the piglets were born, they'd named all five after other characters in the book: Charlie, Veruca, Augustus, Mike and they'd christened the runt of the litter little Wonka. Everytime Rick heard one of them call a pig by name he'd frown and remind them they shouldn't get attached, these pigs weren't pets. As she watched Rick throw them one by one, cut and bloody to the walkers, she'd wished she'd listened.

Maggie's frightened cry had alerted them to the situation and she had run with Rick and Daryl from the gravesite to the bowing fence. A particularly large snarl of walkers had piled up against a portion of chain link that was threatening to fall completely. There were seven of them, working to down as many walkers as possible, but it was clear it was a losing battle. The fence leaned dangerously low, allowing one walker to nearly come over to their side. They frantically had pushed back, trying to find any hold on the fence that would keep their bare hands from the deadly, snapping teeth. Finally Rick had ordered Daryl to get the truck and they led the walkers away, sacrificing the piglets to save themselves. A move necessary, but sickening to them all. The fences were secure, for now. They'd reinforced them the best they could, but it wouldn't hold forever. Still, it had bought them some time and she and Daryl, now joined by Maggie and Glenn, were back to digging graves. She was standing two feet deep in the freshly dug soil, watching the smoke from the smouldering remains of the pig pen coil up into the sky and trying to get the sound of the squealing pigs out of her head, when she saw Tyreese come barrelling down the grassy slope. Carol was behind him, struggling to keep up. Even from this distance it was clear that there was something wrong as he headed towards Rick.

"Daryl." She called out to get his attention. His back was to the prison, but he stopped digging and turned just as Rick came to meet Tyreese in the long grass.

Tyreese, normally so calm and gentle, was clearly angry. He was shouting, but Kate could only make out a few words: fire, blood, Karen.

"What's going on now?" Maggie mumbled, pushing her hair out of her face. The four of them had abandoned their digging, transfixed by the scene in front of them. It was hard to believe that the day could get worse, but something had to be really wrong for Tyreese to be behaving like this.

Rick was struggling to keep him calm, holding his palms out towards him and nodding. Carol had caught up and was standing quietly behind him, arms crossed over her chest. Daryl climbed out of the grave, ready to get involved if things escalated.

Rick finally looked over towards them. "Daryl." He shouted, motioning for him to join them. They'd turned and headed up towards the prison and Daryl took off in a sprint to catch up. Kate watched him go, wondering what could have happened and worrying about Karen.

Twenty minutes later and Daryl emerged from the prison alone. She could tell by the way he was walking, a slump to his shoulders and his head hanging, that the news wasn't good. He approached the growing cemetery and came to a stop as the three of them scrambled out of the graves, anxious for an explanation.

"Gotta dig two more. It was Karen and David." Daryl started. Kate and Maggie had stopped a safe distance away from him and Kate struggled to hear, his voice was so low and weary.

"They're dead?" Kate asked, fear shadowing her features.

"We just saw her a few hours ago, it was just a cough. How could it kill them so fast?" Glenn asked.

"Naw. Wasn't the flu." Daryl shook his head. "Someone killed them, set their bodies on fire."

Kate brought her gloved hands up to her face in horror, smearing dirt all over her nose and cheeks in the process.

"Who would do that? Why?" Glenn asked. Daryl just shook his head again.

"Tyreese found them like that?" Maggie asked. "How awful."

"Ya, poor bastard lost it. Punched Rick. Rick saw red, had to pull him off Tyreese. I think he's up having Hershel look at his hand now. I left Tyreese up there with the bodies. He wouldn't leave."

By nightfall the dead had been buried. Fourteen additions to their cemetery which was already bigger than it should be. Kate couldn't remember a time in her life where she had felt more exhausted. Not in the days before the prison when they had wandered endlessly or in the days since when they'd worked so hard to make this place a home. Her muscles were aching from hours of digging and clearing and reinforcing the fences. Waking up before the sun had done her no favors either and the baby zapped whatever energy she had to spare. She was emotionally drained, they hadn't lost so many people at one time since the night the quarry camp was attacked. She longed for the comfort of her bed, even if Daryl wouldn't be in it tonight. The sun was all but gone when she exited C Block, arms clutching onto a pillow and blanket. Daryl was leaning against one of the picnic benches in the courtyard, holding onto his crossbow and chewing on the inside of his mouth.

"Brought you some bedding." She said, placing it on the table top. She knew Daryl would never ask for it, but she didn't like the idea of him sleeping in the tower without it. She didn't like the idea of being away from him at all tonight, not after everything that had happened, but she knew Daryl wouldn't bend.

"Thanks." He looked her over, searching for something. "You feelin' ok?"

"I am. Just tired." She struggled to hide the weariness from her voice.

He nodded his head, but she knew her reassurances did little to stop his worry.

"I want you to shut the cell door tonight. It might be a good idea to lock the gate downstairs too."

"I will. You have a counsel meeting in the morning?"

He nodded. "Go on and try and get some sleep."

"Ok. Goodnight Daryl. I love you."

She turned and headed to the gate, feeling awkward not being able to kiss or touch him.

"Kate?" He called after her, just before she reached the prison. "In my pack, in the cell, I brought something back from the Big Spot. Meant to give it to you yesterday, but with Zach and everything after…"

He trailed off.

"OK. I'll look."

"It's ain't a big deal. Just wanted to let you know before I forget."

She gave him a sad, weary smile and waved, before she turned and walked through the heavy metal door and disappeared inside the prison. She clicked her flashlight on, crossed the empty common room and climbed the stairs to their cell. The prison felt like a different place tonight. Quieter than normal. She wondered how the group in Cell Block D were doing, how much worse the silence must seem for them.

Karen and David weighed heavy on her mind. The knowledge that someone who they lived amongst everyday, someone that was under their roof right now was capable of cold blooded murder was chilling. The thought had angered and shocked her before, in the light of day with Daryl standing at her side, but now in their dark cell alone it scared her. She flipped on the lantern and clicked the flashlight off. The cell door clanked as she pulled it shut and grabbed Daryl's pack from where it sat against the wall. Dropping onto the bed, her overworked muscles singing in relief, she pulled his heavy canvas pack onto her lap and unzipped it. Digging past granola bars, a water bottle and a pack of beef jerky, her hand finally closed around something soft and fuzzy and she pulled out a stuffed, yellow duck. It was made from soft terry cloth, it's little bill and webbed feet a rubbery material perfect for a teething baby. She let out a laugh that caught in her throat as tears stung at the back of her eyes. She let the pack slip to the floor and crawled underneath the blankets, falling asleep quickly with her hand curled around their baby's first toy.

Kate woke up early in her gray and lonely cell, covered in sweat, with a pounding headache. Cursing herself for overdoing it the day before she realized she probably hadn't been drinking near enough water to keep her and the baby hydrated properly. Her sore muscles screamed in protest as she sat up and reached down to get the water bottle she saw in Daryl's pack last night. She drank it quickly, the water soothing her dry, scratchy throat and thought for a second about getting up and ready for the day. Her pillow looked soft and inviting and its pull proved too much to ignore, deciding she could afford to lay back down for a few more minutes.

It was a cough that woke her finally. A jarring and violent bark that wracked her body and made her chest burn. She sat up and gripped the side of the bed for support as another hacking fit tore through her.

"Kate?" Beth's voice echoed up the stairs. "Is that you? Do you need help?"

"Beth, stay down there." Another cough interrupted her and Kate struggled to get her breath. "I need to go see Dr. S."


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33

DARYL

"Hershel, can I ask you somethin'?"

"Of course, Daryl. What's on your mind?"

The council meeting had just ended and the plan was to send Daryl, Michonne and anyone else they could wrangle to get medication at a veterinary college 50 miles out. He had a lot to do before they could go, including letting Kate know, but right now he needed to run something by Hershel.

"That thing you said, 'bout isolatin' the vulnerable?"

"The elderly and the young, yes."

Daryl blinked twice, "What about Kate?"

Hershel looked at him with compassion. "Because she's pregnant? I hadn't considered that. Yes, Daryl, I think Kate would be among the vulnerable. She should probably be in isolation as well."

Daryl shook his head. "I'll let her know."

He knew Kate wouldn't want to, would think he was being overprotective, but he would feel better about leaving if he knew they were doing everything to keep her healthy. He'd had a hard time sleeping last night, worrying about her. She had looked so exhausted as they had said goodnight and he wished he had insisted she take it easy. There was no reason she had to dig graves, the prison was filled with people who could do that. But he knew that was becoming less and less true as the hours ticked by. Everyone who lived in D Block that hadn't been killed yesterday had come down with the flu and now Sasha and Dr. S had it too.

He headed out into the courtyard, squinting into the bright morning sun and scanning the yard for Kate. It was unsettling how empty the grounds were. He had gotten used to there always being groups at the tables eating and talking loudly, people clearing walkers at the fences and he could almost always count on Kate working in the field with Rick and Carl. There was no sign of anybody this morning.

The metal gate clanked open slowly and Maggie stepped out.

"Mornin' Daryl." She smiled. "Y'all got out of the council meetin'? Glenn still in there?"

"Ya, I think he's still with your dad. Hey Maggie, you seen Kate this mornin'? Thought she'd be out here by now."

"She's still sleepin'. Want me to go wake her lazy butt up?"

"Naw. Let her sleep, she needs it with the baby and all."

She smiled, a genuine Maggie smile that stretched from ear-to-ear. She reached out and squeezed Daryl's arm. He stiffened at her touch, but her smile didn't fade.

"If Sleepin' Beauty makes an appearance, I'll tell her you were lookin' for her."

It didn't take Daryl long to get Zach's Dodge Charger ready to go. It needed some oil, but other than that he was relieved to see the kid took real good care of it. It would be him, Michonne and Bob heading the 50 miles out to Peachtree Tech. He had hoped for a fourth, even trying to convince Tyreese that the best way he could help his sister would be to join them on the run, but he didn't seem swayed. Daryl didn't blame him, not after what happened to Karen. He still hadn't had a chance to connect with Kate and he wasn't going to leave without saying goodbye. He was sure she'd be awake by now, so as soon as they were finished packing the car he planned to head back up to see if someone could find her for him inside.

Bob and Daryl were loading up the last of the supplies when Tyreese found them at the front gate.

"Still got room for one more?" Tyreese asked, a fierceness in his manner that Daryl wasn't accustomed to seeing in the usually amiable man.

"Hell ya." Daryl replied. He was relieved Tyreese had decided to join them, they were going to need all the help they could get.

"Good. Just gotta get my gear."

Daryl nodded and hoisted his crossbow through the window. Bob stood at the side of the car waiting on instruction.

"Be back in a bit and we'll go."

Daryl was just headed up the gravel path when Beth slammed the rust colored gate open, her face frantic, eyes wild, searching the grounds for someone.

"Everything ok?" He shouted, fear eddying in his gut.

"Its Kate. She's sick. Says she needs to see Dr. S."

"Where's she at?" He demanded, breaking out in a run.

"In your cell."

In the minute it took for Daryl to reach their bed, he had already begun to blame himself. What the hell was wrong with him? Why didn't he realize something was wrong when he hadn't seen her the entire morning? He knew he should've made her stay inside yesterday.

He rushed into their cell and found her sitting on the edge of the bed. She looked up at him with red rimmed eyes underlined by dark circles. Her skin was even paler than normal and she looked so vulnerable as she hunched over, elbows on her knees.

"Daryl, don't come in here."

"The hell I won't." He growled, scooping her up in his arms, despite her protests that she was still perfectly capable of walking.

She was burning up and she closed her eyes as her head fell against his shoulder. Beth was at the bottom of the stairs, staring wide mouthed as he made his way down the steps.

"Get the gate!" He roared and Beth moved quickly, opening it and taking a step back as he approached.

He made his way to Cell Block A as quickly as possible, talking to Kate the whole way.

"It's gonna be a'right, don't worry. They're sending out a group to get medicine. It's gonna be fine. Ok?"

They entered the small space outside of Cell Block A where the heavy steel door separated the sick from the rest of the prison.

"I gotta put you down for a second." Daryl said, setting her shaky feet onto the cement floor. He pounded on the thick pane of glass and peered into the dark shadows of death row, but he couldn't see anyone. He looked down at Kate as she leaned heavily against the cement wall, her body heaving with the effort of each breath. He slammed his fist again, harder and louder and eventually he saw movement and Glenn came into view.

"Shit."

"What?" Kate asked, looking up alarmed at the sound of his voice.

"Glenn's sick too."

It was worse than Daryl had imagined. Cell Block A was dark and dank. It made their bare accommodations in C look like a luxury hotel. The air was filled with sour sick breath and you could only escape the pitiful cries when someone had a coughing fit. The cells were close together and as Glenn led them to one of the few that were still empty, a walker slammed itself against the bars. Daryl tried to avert his eyes, he didn't want to know who else they'd lost, but he was almost certain it was Gabe from the Decatur group.

He got Kate on a bed and she elected to sit up, scooting herself against the cement wall, leaning her head back and closing her eyes.

Daryl paced back and forth in the small cell, frantically rubbing the back of his hand against his forehead. He stepped outside of the cell and stared down the corridor, looking for someone, something, anything that might help Kate.

Glenn still stood, pale and sweaty, just outside the cell.

"Daryl."

Daryl, too distracted to pick up on Glenn's quiet voice, continued his frantic path between her bed and the hallway.

"Daryl." Glenn said, mustering all the energy he had to get his attention.

Daryl came to a stop in front of Glenn, desperation radiating off of his body with each rapid breath. His arms were at his sides, fists clenching and unclenching in nervous rhythm.

"Are you guys ready to go? To get the meds?"

Daryl looked at him like he'd sprouted a third eye.

"I ain't goin'. I ain't leavin' her all alone in here."

"Daryl, you have to," Glenn began, taking shallow breaths between words. "She, we, need…" He broke off into a coughing fit and slid down the wall to sit.

"Daryl, what are you doing in here?" Hershel hobbled towards them, a wooden crate of supplies in his hands and a handkerchief over his mouth. "Are you sick?"

Daryl rushed towards him. "Kate."

Hershel winced, before giving Daryl a firm look. "You shouldn't be in here. You're putting yourself at risk."

"I don't care 'bout myself. You gotta help her."

Hershel set the crate down in front of the cell and eyed Glenn on the ground and Kate through the bars.

"Daryl, I have some ideas to help them, but they need those meds. So let me handle this and you go get on the road."

"I ain't leavin' her."

"Daryl, you're upset and worried, I get that, but you can't help her here. You've gotta go, we're losing time. Sooner you leave, sooner those meds will be helping her get better.

"SEND RICK!" He exploded, throwing his arm in the air. "Let him be the one that leaves his family for once." He turned and stormed a few feet away, rubbing at the tears in his eyes with the back of his hand, before stopping and turning back.

Fear was coursing through Daryl's veins. He felt helpless. The thought of leaving her here, in this pit, to die or be killed, made him feel like he was going crazy.

"Daryl." Kate's weary voice pulled him out of his tortured mind and he went and knelt by the bed. "You've got to go. It's ok. Hershel will take care of me until you can get back." She smiled and shook her head. He knew she was trying to be encouraging, but he could see the fear in her face and it cut him in two. He looked back over his shoulder and watched as Hershel helped Glenn off the ground and led him away. He turned back to Kate.

"I don't wanna leave you."

"I know. I wish you didn't have to, but you do Daryl, you do." She coughed, doubling over and going to a great effort to lean away from him. "You have to go."

He looked at the face of the woman he loved, her blue eyes watery and her blonde hair escaping the knot on top of her head and forming little wisps around her face, and he felt like he was watching his whole world spin down the drain. It was true that he hadn't been with her long, what was months in the span of a lifetime, but it was the part of his life that had been worth something. He didn't want this to be the end, he didn't want to imagine that this was the last time he would see her alive and breathing.

"It's ok." She whispered again, but this time tears were filling her eyes and spilling over onto her cheeks. Daryl's face crumpled and he dropped his chin to his chest.

"No, don't. Don't. It'll be ok." She promised, reaching up and resting her hand on his cheek, he turned into it, holding it to his face and planting a kiss on her palm. He knew there was no way she actually believed it, they both knew this flu was killing people faster than they ever imagined possible, but he also knew she was right. That the best way he could help her was to try and get the medicine back as soon as possible. Michonne, Tyreese and Bob would be faster with a fourth, he'd said it himself to Tyreese just this morning. He couldn't risk making that group any weaker, they needed to be as strong as possible to have the best chance of getting there and back as fast as they could.

He kissed her palm again. "I'll go. But, please, you gottta get better Kate, get through it. You and the baby. I love you, I do. And we'll get the medicine and you'll get better and we'll have this baby and I'll teach him to hunt and he'll run around this prison 'causing trouble and makin' us pull our hair out. You thought Carl was a handful, just you wait, you'll wish you never picked a Dixon."

She continued to cry, but she let out a laugh. He stood and kissed the hot skin on her forehead.

"I'll be back Kate."

"Be careful Daryl. I love you."

He gave her one long, mournful look, trying to not think of it as the last time he would see her and headed out of the cell. He strode back down the block, avoiding the eyes of the desperately sick people who had long been looking to him for survival. He was almost to the door when he spied Dr. S alone in a cell, sitting on the bed and staring blankly at the cinderblock wall.

"Dr. S?"

The doctor looked up, surprised to see someone healthy.

"Daryl?"

"Kate's sick." Daryl hesitated. The doctor looked awful and he didn't want to burden him further, but he had to ask. "Hey doc? The baby, do you think, I mean, if Kate can get through this, will the baby be ok?"

Dr. S's lips formed a tight line as he considered the question.

"It's hard to say Daryl. It's possible everything could be fine with the baby."

"Possible? That don't sound very encouragin'."

"I don't want to give you false hope Daryl." Dr. S. took a labored breath, his speech was slow. "We haven't had much luck controlling the fevers in here, the coughing is violent, breathing is affected. She is in her first trimester and that is the riskiest time of pregnancy. I wish I could be more encouraging, I just don't know."

Daryl nodded.

"Well, I'm headin' out with a group now for the meds. You hold on doc."

Daryl stepped into the courtyard and shielded his eyes from the bright sunlight. He spotted Carol sitting on the patio area next to an upturned water barrel. Her head was in her hands and her shoulders slumped.

"You a'right?" He asked as he approached her.

Carol looked up at him and he could tell she was upset about something.

"I'm fine. You headed out?" Carol stood, wiping her hands on her pants and avoiding his gaze.

He was relieved when she lied, relieved that she didn't tell him anything that would keep him from asking her for her help.

"Ya. They're waitin' for me at the gate." He looked across the field and saw the three of them leaning against the bumper of the car. "Hey, Kate's sick. I don't wanna leave her, not with what happened to Karen and David, but I gotta go get those meds or she won't have a chance, none of them will. Will you watch her for me? I know it's a lot to ask, but I can't go, I can't leave if I think…"

His voice broke and he looked at the ground, when he looked back up Carol had tears in her eyes.

"Please, will ya just, will ya promise me ya won't let her…" He looked down at the ground again, fighting for control. "Ya won't let her die alone. That you won't let anyone get to her."

Carol wiped tears from her cheeks, nodding, "I will."

He nodded, bringing his hand to his eyes quickly and blinking hard. "I gotta go, shoulda been on the road already. Don't wanna lose any more daylight."

KATE -

Kate's eyelids were too heavy to open, but she was awake. She had forgotten how horrible it felt to run a high fever. Her entire body was aching and her eyes felt like they were burning holes in her head. She had no concept of how long she had been asleep, only that she hadn't been awake for much longer after Daryl left. Her heart felt like it was breaking in two at the thought of his face, tears falling unashamedly, as he said goodbye. Kate didn't know if the medicine would get here in time or if it would even help, but she didn't want Daryl to have any regrets. If the run failed because he was sitting at her side, if people died without the chance of taking the meds, if she died, she knew Daryl would never forgive himself. Kate was scared. She had seen the people she knew reduced to walkers stretching newly dead arms out the bars as Daryl helped her to this bed. She could hear the violent coughs. She could hear the whimpering. This wasn't the sort of thing that seemed to get better on its own.

She suddenly had the feeling of being watched and her eyes flew open. Little Lizzie was standing over her, just staring.

"Lizzie, you scared me!" Kate said, trying to find her breath. "What were you doing?" Kate scrambled to a sitting position and muffled a cough in the crook of her arm.

"I was checking to see if you were dead." Lizzie said, expressionless.

"Dead? I was asleep." Kate's head was pounding.

"Carol told me you're having a baby."

Kate shook her head, laying her hand on her stomach. There was nothing to prove a pregnancy existed there, she was too early to be showing, but she did it anyway.

"My Aunt Kim was gonna have a baby once, but her baby died before it was born." Lizzie's face took on a fascinated slant, "Do you think if your baby dies it will turn into one of those things? Do you think it could eat you?"

Kate's mouth dropped open in horror.

"Lizzie!" Hershel's stern voice startled them both. He stood at the door of the cell, a tin cup in one hand and a wet rag in the other. "I think you probably should go back to your bed. Kate needs to rest."

"Yes, sir." Lizzie said, shuffling out of the cell and out of sight.

"That child." Hershel said, shaking his head and sitting on the edge of the small cot. "Can you sit up and drink some of this?"

Kate struggled to pull herself up. Hershel held the cup to her mouth and she took a small sip. She swallowed it and started to cough again.

"What is that?" She said, wrinkling her nose.

"Elderberry tea. My wife used to make it. It can help with the symptoms, the fever."

Kate nodded, closed her eyes and attempted to draw more air into her lungs.

"Kate, you need to drink some more. It will help and you need to try and stay hydrated."

Kate drank a few sips before falling back on the mattress. Hershel took the wet cloth and laid it across her forehead.

"Hershel," She asked, her breathing louder than her voice, "Is anyone getting better or is everyone just dying?"

"As soon as I get this tea into everyone, people will start feeling better. Daryl is going to bring medicine back."

"How long has he been gone?"

Hershel took a few seconds to answer, pressing the cloth down onto her forehead. "A few hours."

Kate's heart sank at his reply. She was hoping she had slept longer than that, was hoping that relief wasn't so far off.

"Kate, I need your help with something. If you can."

Kate thought that Hershel had lost his mind.

"You feeling alright Hershel, because the idea of me being of any help right now sounds crazy."

Hershel gave a little chuckle.

"I'm not going to ask you to build a new fence or anything like that." He joked. "Earlier, while you were sleeping, we had to intubate Henry. Sasha has been keeping oxygen to his lungs by squeezing the bag attached to his mask. I need Glenn's help with rounds, so I was hoping you could relive Sasha so she could rest a bit."

Kate shook her head.

"I think I can manage that for awhile."

Hershel smiled, his eyes crinkling kindly. "Come on, I'll take you over there now."

Hershel had left Kate at Henry's bedside with instructions to holler for help if she felt light headed or too tired to continue. The fact that they were left to rely on people as sick as she was to literally keep people alive was evidence of what dire straits they were really in. She had been at it for over an hour, squeezing air into his lungs every 5 seconds and watching the slow rise and fall of his chest. His red, curly hair was stuck to his sweaty forehead and she realized she had never seen him without his knit cap on. Glenn appeared in the doorway and the sight of his pale, sweaty face was frightening.

"Glenn, you look awful." She blurted out, immediately regretting it.

"You don't look so great yourself."

She realized he was probably right and managed a small laugh, that turned into a cough.

"Carol wants to talk to you."

"Is she in here? Is she sick?" Kate felt panic well up in her.

"No, she's waiting for you at the window. In the... " He trailed off, looking for a word, "...viewing room?"

Kate handed Henry off to Glenn and stood up, a wave of dizziness causing her field of vision to darken. She reached a hand out to steady herself on the cold cement wall and fought off the threat of unconsciousness.

"You ok?" Glenn asked.

Kate opened her eyes and was relieved the room was no longer spinning.

"Ya, I think so. I'll be back."

She made her way out of the cell and down the block towards the stairs at an excruciatingly slow pace. She clung to the metal handrail and eased herself down the steps all the while wondering how she'd ever get back up them.

She arrived in the little room out of breath and with a fresh coat of sweat slicking her skin. The room was small, with a gurney complete with arm restraints pushed against one wall. A large window opened up into a room filled with chairs and Kate realized this was likely the prison's execution chamber. The thought, despite the death and violence she'd been exposed to this year, was horrifying. Carol stood at the window, a motherly look of concern etched onto her face.

"How are you?"

"Alive. For now." Kate leaned against the window for support.

Carol frowned. "Don't talk like that Kate. It isn't funny."

"I wasn't trying to be funny. People aren't exactly surviving this thing, Carol." There was a bite in her response that she immediately regretted.

"You can't think like that. Daryl will be back with medicine soon."

Kate wondered if Carol really believed that. She felt like it was still hours off and that was if it went well. She had her doubts that they'd even find any and if they did that it would do the job.

"You don't know how bad it is in here. I just spent the last hour squeezing air into Henry's lungs with a bag."

Carol faltered for a second, but determination set in her face again.

"Kate, you and I both know that Daryl will get those meds back here and until he does you need to fight."

"I'm trying Carol, I am. It's just…" She pursed her pale lips together and looked up to the corner of the ceiling, trying to think of what it was that she was trying to explain. "I just can't stop thinking that was the last time I'll see Daryl. I'm just so scared."

Carol gave her a sympathetic look.

"Carol?" Rick called as he walked into the small room.

"Ya?" Carol replied, not bothering to turn towards him. Kate noticed a hardness flicker across her face, but couldn't place it. She wondered if they'd had a fight about something.

Rick looked through the glass at Kate and she didn't miss the sadness that passed over his face when he saw her. "How you doin' Kate?" He asked.

Kate shrugged. "I've been better."

"You hang in there. Daryl will be back soon." Rick repeated the same mantra everyone else had seemed to have adopted. "Hey, Carol, can I talk to you for a minute?"

Carol left Rick waiting for an answer.

"Kate, I promised Daryl I'd check in on you. I'll be back, ok? You hang in there. You fight."

Kate nodded, unsure of what else to do or say. She wasn't sure fighting it, whatever that meant, would do any good, but if it made them feel better to think she would she'd agree.

Carol turned and followed Rick out of the room and Kate stayed put for a second trying to work up the strength to head back up the stairs. From the hallway, where Rick and Carol had just disappeared, she heard their raised voices. She tried to make out what they were arguing about, but it was too muffled to understand. Adding to the stress of the illness was the fact that they were so isolated in here. For all she knew the group would return without Daryl and no one would tell her. The thought was frightening and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't shake it.

The bleakest of nights gave way to the morning with no real change. The tea seemed to be helping to slow the symptoms, they had only lost one through the night, but Kate wondered if it was worth it, only postponing what seemed to be the inevitable end of their lives. Despair that she couldn't afford had seeped into every cranny of her body, she couldn't tell where it ended and the achiness from the flu began. She'd spent the night hours resting when she could, taking her turns at Henry's bedside and helping Hershel when he asked. If Glenn and Sasha's appearance was any indication, she knew she must look like she was on the brink of death and she wondered how much longer they could sustain this before they started to fall like dominos. It was getting harder for them all to stay awake at Henry's side, it was harder for them to follow Hershel from cell to cell, and it was getting increasingly harder to simply breath.

When she met Carol at the window that morning she could tell by the look on her face that Carol had her doubts about how much longer Kate's body could take it.

"No sign of Daryl?" Kate whispered, her face so close to the glass it fogged up with her breath.

Carol shook her head and Kate examined her features for any sign of deceit.

"I came by to see you last night, but Hershel said you were resting."

"You and Rick...you were arguing...why?"

Carol, who's face was already pinched with worry, responded with clear unease, "You heard us?"

Kate shook her head as it rested against the glass. "Couldn't hear what you were saying. Just knew you were arguing."

Carol was silent for a second. "He wanted me to go on a run with him, but I promised Daryl I wouldn't leave you."

"I don't think it matters...you can go."

"No, I won't break my promise. Not to him."

Kate raised her eyes to Carol's and the two women stood there in silence, an awkward moment passing between them as Kate considered the weight of Carol's statement.

"Carol, if I die before he gets back…"

"Kate, I told you not to think that way."

"Please listen to me. Look at me. We can't pretend that isn't a possibility anymore."

Her speech was weak and interrupted by coughing. Carol didn't respond.

"If I die," She began again, and swallowed hard, trying to ignore the scorching pain in her throat, "...don't let Daryl blame himself." Her face crumpled a little at the thought, but the fever had left her too dehydrated to have tears to cry. "I know he will, but try and make him see there was nothing he could do differently. Don't let him get lost, Carol, don't let him run off. He'll try, you know he'll try. I'm asking you because he trusts you, he might listen to you and because I know, I think, that maybe you love him too."

They eyed each other with discomfort before Carol looked away and cleared her throat. Kate exhaled and took a step backwards, raising her hands to cover her eyes and dragging them to rest on either cheek.

"Kate, you aren't..."

"Tell me you'll help him."

Carol nodded.

"Thank you. I'm going to go back now."

"I'll check on you in a few hours, ok?"

Kate had her doubts she'd be alive in a few hours, but she shook her head anyway. She turned and walked back out to the cell block.

It took Kate a long time to get back up the stairs to her cell. She had to stop and rest after every step, her head reverberating painfully in her skull. As she reached her bed she could feel her heart race, a quick burst of beats that left her feeling dizzy. The blackness that threatened earlier took over suddenly, closing in on her vision from either side until there was nothing.

She was swimming in that strange place, somewhere between dreaming and awake. She could hear voices, echoey and distant and she was vaguely aware of a pinching feeling in the crook of her arm. She felt her mind stretch to the surface of consciousness long enough to catch a word here or there. She fought to wake, struggling against the fog that was trying to pull her back under. She slowly became aware of a clattering sound, something she couldn't place, loud and inconsistent. It wasn't until she realized her whole body was shivering that she knew it was her own teeth bouncing off each other so hard she thought they might break.

"I'm...s-s-s-s-o…cold." She said, trying to clench her teeth together in an effort to stop their chattering.

"That's a good thing. Means the fever's going down."

She couldn't place the voice, but the mention of fever brought it all back. She was in Cell Block A, death row, she was sick and Daryl was gone. The despair came flooding back in a wave that crashed down on her. She opened her eyes slowly and Bob's face came into focus and suddenly she was aware of the fact that she was being cradled, leaned against someone, arms circled around her. She looked down and saw his hands, the star tattoo on the base of his right thumb, the curve of his forearm as it rested across her body.

Daryl was home and she was still alive. Relieved sobs tumbled out of her, and she clung onto his arm, pressing her face against his skin as he held her tightly against him.


	34. Chapter 34

CHAPTER 34

-KATE-

Within the tall fences of their prison home they began to pick up the pieces. The relief was palpable and although their losses were tremendous there was the collective feeling that the storm had passed. The worst was over. It was time to get back to normal, whatever that would look like now. Those who had come down with the flu were improving, thanks to medicine and the care Hershel had provided them with. Today they would move forward. They would mend the fences that had fallen, they would burn the walkers that had broken through, and they would nurse the sick until they were strong again.

Kate propped herself up against the cement wall of the death row cell and stretched her legs across the narrow mattress. She took inventory of her body. The fever was gone and with it the horrible aches. Yesterday it had felt like her bones were made of ice and someone was chipping away at them, but today all that remained were sore muscles, a result of the violent coughing that still plagued her. Her headache had almost disappeared, a slight pressure the only reminder of the pounding force it had been the last two days. She was still exhausted. She'd been sitting up earlier in an effort to convince Daryl that there were better things he could be doing than watching her lay there and cough, and even that had worn her out. She'd watched him reluctantly leave the cell, promising he would be back soon to check on her. When she was sure he wasn't going to change his mind and come back, she'd collapsed back onto the bed, spent and out of breath. But despite the exhaustion, she knew she'd turned a corner and was on the mend and she was both grateful and amazed that she'd pulled through. Last night she was sure it was the end of the road for her.

This morning she was no longer afraid for herself, but her baby consumed her thoughts. She wondered if it was ok, if it was possible for it to survive such a violent illness. She couldn't stop thinking about Lizzie's ominous mention of what could possibly happen if she lost the pregnancy. She was eager to talk to Hershel or to Dr. S. and hoped they could give her some peace of mind.

She also wanted to know how everyone else was doing and what had happened last night after she had passed out. She dreaded hearing whether they had lost anyone, but it seemed inevitable. The last thing she remembered before everything went black was returning to her cell after talking to Carol and as she recalled that conversation Kate also began to feel regret. What had she said when she was half-delirious and burning with fever? Something about thinking Carol loved Daryl too? It was the exact thing that she had sworn to herself she would never bring up - not to anyone, least of all Carol. She groaned quietly and wondered how awkward it would be when she saw her next. Last night, when it seemed unlikely she would live another day, she needed to know someone would be looking out for Daryl, but things looked different this morning and she was embarrassed.

She remembered walking away from Carol, dragging herself up the stairs and into the cell before the blackness dragged her under. After that it was hard to separate reality from dreams and she hadn't even been sure her memory of Daryl returning was true until she woke up this morning still cradled against him, his arm wrapped across her chest, his strong hand gripping her shoulder.

With the IV removed and the medicine in her system, she hoped they would let her move back to her cell. She missed their bed, with the clean sheets and familiar smells. She wanted to put this nightmare behind them and get back to some kind of normal. They'd lost a lot of people and now that they knew this sort of thing was a reality in this new world, it changed things, but they had to move on and it wasn't going to happen on this plastic mattress.

She heard footsteps and knew by the slight drag that it was Hershel. He came into view, on his way towards the stairs. He glanced through the bars of her cell and when he saw her awake and sitting up he headed her way, a warm smile on his face.

"How you feeling today Katie?" He asked, using a name no one else ever used for her except her grandfather and him. He looked exhausted, but there was an energy in his manner that was probably fueled by relief.

"So much better. I'm still really exhausted, but it feels so good to not feel so awful." She smiled at him, her dry lips cracking as they stretched over her teeth. "Thank you so much Hershel, for keeping me alive."

Hershel shook his head. "You owe your thanks to Daryl, Michonne, Tyreese, Bob. They were the ones that got the medicine. They were the ones out there. And Bob was up all night, tending to everyone."

"I am so grateful, I am, but Hershel, I wouldn't have been alive to take the medicine if it wasn't for you. None of us in here would be."

Hershel was a humble man and he changed the subject quickly.

"Speaking of Daryl, where is he? I'm surprised he's willing to let you out of his sight."

"He was here all night. I convinced him this morning that I was ok. He said something about one of the fences falling? I think he was going to go and see if he could help with it. How's Glenn? Daryl said that he was in rough shape when they got in."

"Better. He's breathing on his own. Maggie is with him."

"He wasn't breathing?! Did you have to use a tube?" Kate remembered how lifeless Henry had been when he couldn't breathe on his own and was horrified to think of Glenn in that condition.

Hershel shook his head. "It was close."

"What about Henry?"

Hershel's face fell a little. "He didn't make it Kate. I'm sorry."

It shouldn't have surprised her that Henry was gone. She'd wondered last night how someone could possibly come back from that, he was a shade of gray that looked more walker than living person, but the news still upset her. She had had a stake in his survival, having sat at his side for so long. It gave her a little insight on how Hershel must be feeling about anyone that had succumbed to this illness under his watch.

"Anyone else?" She asked in a small, hesitant voice, afraid of the answer.

Hershel sat on the edge of her bed and sighed. "Norris, his son, Lindsay from Decatur, Becky, Seth and Caleb."

Kate's mouth turned down in an involuntary frown and she struggled to not start crying. The burden had to be heavy for Hershel and she didn't want to add to his pain, but the news was upsetting. She knew them all of course, some better than others, but knowing that Dr. S. was gone hit her particularly hard. They sat in silence for a few moments until she trusted herself to speak without her voice betraying her emotions.

"Is Sasha ok?"

"Better." Hershel seemed to be relieved that he could offer some good news. "Everyone seems to be responding to the drugs. I hesitate to say we are out of the woods, but I'm encouraged."

Kate took a deep breath. "Hershel, Do you think my baby is ok?"

"Honey, I wish I knew the answer to that." His face, a mask of fatherly compassion, was impossible to read. "Have you had any cramping? Bleeding?"

"No. Nothing. I'm not even nauseous anymore, I should be relieved about that, but it just makes me worry."

"Well, all we can do is wait and pray. I wish I had a better answer for you, that we could do something, but you know how limited we are here. Without ultrasound equipment or a heartbeat doppler there is really no way to be sure. A stethoscope won't pick up a heartbeat until about halfway through the pregnancy."

Kate shook her head and looked at her hands in her lap. She abandoned the fight with her tears and watched as two dropped down onto her wrist. She had never done well with the unknown.

Bob appeared in the cell door.

"Hershel, I thought you were heading out to get some fresh air?"

"Had to check on my patient." He said with a smile, patting Kate on the leg and lowering his head so she'd meet his eyes. She looked at him, nodded and attempted a small smile, wiping at her tears.

"Hang in there, Kate. Either way, we'll get through this."

With some effort, he pushed himself into a standing position.

"How are you doing Kate?" Bob asked.

"Much better. Thank you for getting the meds, Bob."

Bob made a face she didn't understand, but she got the feeling he was even more uncomfortable with her gratitude than Hershel was.

"You got a couple bags of fluid in you. I took your IV out early this morning, you slept right through it. I'm glad you're feeling better. Anything you need?"

"Do you think I can move back into C Block?"

Hershel and Bob exchanged glances and Hershel shrugged, "Why not?."

"Maybe we can get you moved back this afternoon. I'd like to keep an eye on you in here for a few more hours." Bob offered.

"Well, I'll leave you two to figure that out. I'm gonna go get that fresh air while I have the chance."

Hershel limped slowly out of the cell and towards the staircase. Bob watched until he disappeared before leaning against one of the cement walls.

"Hershel tell you what went on last night?"

"He told me who we lost."

"From what Maggie was telling me, it got pretty ugly. A couple people turned, one attacked Hershel. Two others were killed coming to his aid. Maggie was helping Rick with the fences when she heard a gunshot and came running up here. She found Hershel wrestling with a walker. He was trying to get the ET tube off its face so he could use it on Glenn. Maggie shot the walker and from the sound of it, they got to Glenn without a moment to spare. Maggie said he was turning blue. He's lucky to be alive this morning."

Kate tried to get the image of a reanimated Henry wrestling with Hershel out of her head.

"Thank God Maggie was there to help him." She knew Hershel had been keeping her busy all night, Glenn and Sasha too, but when he ended up really needing them he was by himself. "Hershel said Glenn was doing better this morning?"

"He is. Breathing on his own. Talking some, although I imagine his throat is pretty raw from the tube. But I think he'll be ok.."

"How'd the run go? Daryl didn't say much about it, just that you guys ran into a herd."

"It went ok." He said, looking down at the floor. "I'm going to let you get some rest Kate. Let me know if you need anything, I'll be around."

-DARYL -

"Gone? What do ya mean, gone?" Daryl demanded.

Daryl hadn't seen Carol this morning. He'd been helping Tyreese repair and reinforce the fences and it surprised him that Carol, normally one of the first to help, wasn't out here doing something. He'd wanted to thank her for checking in on Kate, he wasn't sure if it did any good but he knew he had felt a lot better leaving because Carol was looking out. He'd come down to the garden to ask Rick if he'd seen her this morning, but the last thing he expected was for Rick to say she had left.

Rick glanced nervously towards Carl and back at Daryl.

"Carl, looks like Michonne and Tyreese are heading towards the gate. Want to go open it up for them?"

Carl sighed and gave his father the most annoyed look, but he didn't argue, just turned and stormed away. Rick turned his attention back to Daryl.

"I asked her to leave."

"You what?" Anger simmered in Daryl's eyes. He knew he had to be misunderstanding Rick's meaning. There was no possible way Rick could really mean that he had asked Carol to leave their community permanently.

Rick looked over his shoulder and lowered his voice. It was unnecessary, Daryl and Rick were alone in the garden. Carl was out of earshot and the only other people out here were Michonne and Tyreese and they were bumping along in the jeep, heading towards the gate with a trailer of walkers and full containers of gasoline.

"Daryl, she killed Karen and David. She can't stay here. I won't allow that."

Daryl felt like he'd been punched in the gut. He shook his head in disbelief, challenging Rick's statement with his expression.

"She confessed. She wasn't sorry."

Daryl shook his head again, trying to process the information. It didn't make any sense to him.

"You didn't think you should wait? I thought you were done makin' decisions? It wasn't your call, Rick."

Rick stood firm in his decision.

"I was the one here to make it and I did. What if Kate had gotten sick first? Or Carl? What if Carol had killed one of them? Would you want her to still live here?"

Daryl pushed the idea from his head. He knew he'd rip anyone who hurt Kate to pieces, but he just couldn't picture the Carol he knew being capable of anything like that.

"There has to be another way. She won't survive out there alone."

"She's strong, more of a survivor than we ever gave her credit for. And she's not alone. She insisted on taking Mika and Lizzie."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" Daryl growled, approaching Rick angrily, but stopping short. "They're just kids, Rick. How could you let 'em go?"

"Daryl, I couldn't let her stay here and given the choice, they didn't want to stay without her."

Daryl took a couple steps away, rubbing his hands over his face and trying his best to wrap his head around this whole thing.

"She confessed?" Desperation caused his voice to crack.

"She did. Said she was trying to protect us. Said she thought she could stop it."

"I ain't sayin' she was right, but she ain't a murderer Rick."

"I don't know what else you would call it Daryl."

The two men stared hard at each other for a moment.

"She'll be ok. They left this morning, at light. She has food, water, supplies, a car. They'll find a place. People. She's safer out there than she would be in here, once Tyreese finds out."

"You keep tellin' yourself that Rick." Daryl let out a sigh. " You gonna tell Tyreese?"

"I think we owe it to the man."

Daryl nodded. It was true. If something like that had happened to Kate he would want to know, but he didn't think Tyreese would be happy with the justice Rick had doled out on his own. Tyreese would've wanted blood. In that sense Rick had made the right choice, but Daryl kept thinking something different should've been done.

Daryl watched the Jeep speed down the dirt road away from the prison and saw that Carl was making his way back from the gate. He turned to go, but he stopped and headed back towards Rick.

"If you want me to talk to Tyreese with you, let me know."

"I'd appreciate that. Maybe after he and Michonne get through burning the walkers out there."

Daryl nodded again and walked away.

KATE -

Kate decided she couldn't wait until the afternoon to return to her cell. It was hot in A Block and although it wouldn't be any cooler over in C, at least her sweaty body wouldn't stick to the plastic mattress. She had made her way slowly down the steps, hoping she wouldn't run into Bob on the way out. She was afraid he might try to convince her to stay put a little longer. She knew it would be easier for them to keep an eye on everyone recovering if they stayed in one place, but Kate was pretty sure she was going to be ok. She just needed some rest and she knew she would do that better in her own bed.

The prison was eerily silent. Before the flu if you moved from block to block or found yourself in the hallways leading to the library or cafeteria, you'd usually pass by others going about their business. It had reminded her of a bee hive, everyone heading somewhere. Everyone busy. But today the passageways were empty.

Except for Beth and Judith, C Block was quiet too. They were sitting on the floor of Beth's cell playing with red plastic cups. It was currently Judith's favorite toy and Daryl always joked that she was going to be a party girl.

"Hey." Beth called out, getting to her feet to greet her. She was clearly surprised to see Kate up and about. "How are you doing?"

"A lot better. Your dad is my hero." Kate stopped at the bottom of the stairs. "Just heading up to sleep in my own bed."

"Ok. I'm glad you're ok. I was really worried about you."

"Thanks. Me too."

Kate put one foot after the other on the steps to the top of C Block. By the time she reached the second floor she was out of breath and dizzy, but as she fell on her soft bed and buried her head into her own pillow she knew it was worth it. She fell asleep almost immediately.

The great boom rocked the prison and tore her from her sleep. Her first thought was earthquake and then she reminded herself she wasn't in California anymore. Did Georgia even get earthquakes?

"What was that?!" Beth yelped over Judith's cries. Kate sat on the edge of the bed, her hands shaking, and shoved her feet into her boots. She grabbed her holster belt and wrapped it around her hips. She hurried down stairs, afraid to push too hard with running, afraid to go too slow.

"Do you have your gun? Your knife?" She asked Beth as she came to the ground floor, fastening the buckle at her waist.

Beth stood cradling a wailing Judith protectively in her arms. "Ya, but I don't want to take Judy out there. Not until we know what's going on."

Kate nodded, "I'll go look, I'll come back and let you know."

Kate ran out from the cell block, through the common room and out the big, metal gate to the courtyard. The first thing she saw was one of the guard towers in flames. Daryl stood at the fence on the edge of the courtyard, Rick beside him looking across the grassy field towards the gate. Others were making there way out there too. Kate sped across the blacktop and stopped next to Maggie. There on the other side of the perimeter fence stood a tank, flanked on either side by several vehicles and at least a dozen armed people, probably more. Standing on top of the tank was a man, and when he shouted across the field in a calm and collected voice, he knew Rick's name.

"Rick, we need to talk."

Kate turned to Maggie and whispered, "Is that the Governor?" Kate had never seen the man, even when he had attacked the prison it was too chaotic and dark to remember any faces, but who else would know Rick's name. Maggie nodded, her face stoney and pale.

"It's not up to me!" Rick shouted back. There was fear in his voice and that made Kate afraid too. "There's a council. They run this place."

"Is Tyreese on the council?"

Kate squinted into the sun and watched in horror as a man crossed in front of the tank, disappeared behind the open door of one of the vehicles and emerged with Tyreese. With his beefy arms tied behind his back and dozens of weapons waiting for an excuse he had no choice but to kneel as the much smaller man pushed him to the ground. She heard Sasha whimper behind her.

"Michonne?" The Governor asked.

A woman pulled Michonne from the vehicle and pushed her towards Tyreese. The two knelt there, bound and vulnerable.

"I don't make decisions anymore." Rick shouted across the field.

Kate looked at Rick. Even though there was a council, she didn't think anyone had really stopped thinking of Rick as their leader. Not in their group anyway, but she knew that Rick had desperately wanted to shed that responsibility. It wasn't just because of Carl, it was for his own soul too. He saw the man he was turning into and it scared him. But despite the efforts he had made, here they were again. It was agonizing.

"You're making the decisions today Rick. Come down here, let's have that talk."

Daryl and Rick exchanged a look and a nod. Rick reached out and laid a hand on his son's neck, "We can do this." Kate wasn't sure if it was to comfort Carl or to convince himself.

As Rick headed slowly down the gravel path, Daryl turned to where Kate and Sasha stood.

"We can't take them all on, we'll go through the admin building, through the woods like we planned. We ain't got the numbers no more. When was the last time someone checked the stash on the bus?"

"Day before we hit the Big Spot, running low on rations then, we're lower now." Sasha said without taking her eyes off her big brother.

"We'll manage. Things go south, everyone head for that bus, let everybody know." Daryl looked at her and she knew he meant for her to get on the bus too.

They watched as Rick walked past the overturned prison bus and approached the fence. He looked so exposed down there, small against the backdrop of the tank and Kate wondered how he'd get them out of this. They couldn't hear the exchange from here, but Kate tried to convince herself that they would be ok. They'd gotten through things before, when it looked like there was no way. They'd escaped the CDC, they'd encountered herds, the fall of the farm. Even the Governor had attacked them before, hadn't he? They'd beaten him twice. Rick would figure something out. He always did. This was their home, they'd worked so hard, could the universe be that cruel?

Daryl started handing out guns. He moved slowly, trying to not to draw attention to them. She took one in her hand and hoped she wouldn't have to use it. They readied themselves at the fence, eyes glued to Rick's back as he continued to negotiate. She could hear Carl whispering to Daryl, insisting he could take the Governor from here, that he could end it. Daryl was encouraging him to trust his dad, not to do anything that would start something. It was a testament to Daryl's trust in Rick. There was a time someone would have had to talk Daryl out of shooting first.

As they stood at the fence, guns aimed, holding their breath and hoping for some sign that things were being resolved, the minutes seemed to tick by slowly, but all at once it became a blur. The Governor leapt from the tank to the grassy ground and grabbed Michonne's sword, crossing to Tyreese and holding the weapon to his neck. Rick began to gesticulate wildly, his arms opened wide in a pleading gesture. Pleading for Tyreese. Pleading for Michonne. Pleading for the rest of their lives and the home they had built here. Kate could hear Sasha's breathing at her side, fast and loud and full of fear.

The Governor reached back with the sword and swung it hard.

Kate closed her eyes before the sword made contact with Tyreese, but she knew by the anguish in Sasha's scream that it was over. Rick's voice tore through the air, "Noooo!" and the prison yard was filled with the angry sound of gunfire.

They moved through the forest slowly. If there was a silver lining to be had, it was that slower typically equaled quieter and quiet didn't draw many walkers. They'd only had to put down a total of four since they'd ran from the fiery and crumbling remains of the prison, but Kate knew they wouldn't stay lucky forever and she eyed the darkening sky with a bit of panic.

Judith let out the first whimpers of what promised to be a full on cry and Kate met Beth's nervous eyes with her own.

"She's hungry." Beth said.

"Do you have anything for her?" Hershel asked, his eyes creased with worry.

When Kate had run back into the cell block to warn Beth that they had to get out, Beth had already been standing in the common room ready to go. Judith was on one hip and a backpack, stuffed to the gills was thrown over her opposite shoulder. Kate knew somewhere in that bag there had to be something for Judy.

"I have a bottle for her, we'd just have to stop for a minute so I can mix it. I think I can manage to walk and feed her."

Hershel nodded and Beth handed Judith off to Kate before she dropped to her knees between two trees, rummaging through the backpack. She pulled out a bottle, already filled with water and unscrewed the top. She set it on the forest floor and uncapped the canister of formula, dropping a scoopful into the water. She put the formula back into the backpack, zipped it up, capped the bottle and shook it. Judith was reaching for it before Beth had even stood. She took the baby in her arms and Judith eagerly began sucking on the bottle. Beth smiled in relief and they continued on their hunt for shelter. They hadn't gone twenty yards when Kate heard Beth cry out behind her. She turned quickly, knife in hand, expecting to see a walker. Instead Beth was sitting on the forest floor, Judith still working on the bottle and completely unphased.

"It's my ankle. I stepped on a rock and rolled it." She said, her voice high and strained. She was rubbing her ankle with her free hand.

Hershel went to her quickly, assessing the injury with concern.

"It doesn't seem to be broken, but sprains can be worse sometimes. Let's see if you can walk on it."

Hershel took Judith in his arms and he and Kate helped Beth to her feet. She took a step forward, gingerly putting weight on the offending ankle. She sucked in her breath sharply and winced.

"It hurts pretty bad, but I know we can't stop."

"We can definitely rest, see if it feels any better." Kate offered.

Beth shook her head, eyeing the sky. "No, we have to find some place soon. We can't get stuck out here."

They pushed forward, a miserable looking quartet. They weren't the soldiers of the group to begin with, but with Kate still recovering from the flu, Hershel's limitations with his leg and now Beth's injury, they were even weaker than normal. Add to the mix a baby who could begin to cry at any moment and they were about as vulnerable as they could get.

Kate took over the responsibility of Judith while Hershel tried to support Beth as she walked.

"It's kind of like the blind leading the blind." He joked, trying to make light of the pitiful sight they made.

They'd talked about the escape plan a lot in the months they spent at the prison. How they would get everyone out. What they would do about the elderly, the children, the infirm. What they would take and what supplies they would need. In the end it did them little good. The prison fell fast and violently and those who had made their home there were scattered like leaves in the wind. In the chaos Kate didn't know who had made it on the bus, who had been killed and who had escaped, like they had, into the woods. She tried not to panic about being separated from Daryl, but she could feel it welling up from the middle of her chest. She just had to hold it together long enough to find someplace safe.

As the Governor's tank rolled over the first fence, Kate had turned and run for the prison, screaming for Beth to get Judith and run to the bus. Maggie had passed them on the way out, promising she'd meet them there, she just had to find Glenn.

The bus stood in the courtyard, a great, gray metal behemoth with a huge piece of corrugated metal bolted to one side, forming a shield. Their boots pounded across the blacktop and they ducked their heads uselessly at the cracking sound of constant gunfire. Beth was halfway up the steps of the bus and Kate was about to tell her that she wasn't getting on, that she wouldn't leave without Daryl, when Beth turned back towards her, eyes wide with panic.

"Where are the kids? Lizzie, Mika, Luke, Molly - none of them are here. We have to go find them!"

Without a word Kate ran back towards the prison, but was dismayed to find Beth on her heels with Judith in tow.

"Beth, get Judith back on the bus!." She shouted over her shoulder. "I'll find them, I'll bring them back."

"No. I'll help you."

They both knew they didn't have time to argue and so they ran through the C Block common room into the dark passageways of the prison, shouting out the names of the children as they went and with each blast that shook the prison, crumbling cement showering down on them, they grew more panicked.

They found Hershel in the corridor between A and C, making his way slowly to the outside.

"What are you two doing in here? You should be on the bus." He said, clearly frustrated to find them still in the prison.

"Have you seen any of the kids?" Beth asked. "We've been looking and we haven't found any of them."

"No, they're probably on the bus by now and that's where you should be too."

They headed back to the yard to find it in ruins. There were huge holes in the walls of the prison and the catwalk that spanned the distance between C Block and D was destroyed. The BBQ area was torn apart, picnic tables overturned and supplies scattered across the ground. The tank stood smoking in the middle of it all, surrounded by bodies slowly reanimating. Walkers poured in from the forest. The noise had drawn them in and without the fences they moved freely throughout the yard. The bus was gone and there wasn't a soul in sight.

Kate froze there in the torn up courtyard, amid the smoking remains of the prison. She was afraid to look too closely at the bodies. Afraid to find someone she loved, afraid to find Daryl. She didn't want to leave, not without him, but the courtyard was unsafe and becoming worse by the minute. So instead she stood there, unable to make herself choose. It was Hershel who finally made the decision, pulling on her arm gently.

"Come on. We can't stay here, let's see if we can find anyone in the woods."

But they didn't. The bus had left deep tire tracks in the mud outside of the prison, but they lost them once the tracks met the road. They had tried to follow that for some time, hoping they'd find their people eventually, but they weren't trackers and they had no way of knowing for sure they were even going in the right direction. Eventually they spotted a pack of walkers in the distance too big for them to take on themselves and they were forced back into the woods.

In Southern California it seemed you couldn't throw a stone without hitting a building of some kind. The thought of wandering for miles without a house in sight was the most foreign of concepts to Kate, although she'd learned the lesson well enough after the fall of the farm. It was also strange to her that there were spots where the trees were so thick you couldn't even tell there were homes a few yards away. This was how they found shelter that night, right before the last light left the sky. It was a medium sized house on a big piece of wooded land. In the morning Kate would be able to see that there were a few other houses that could be spied from the front porch, one burned and uninhabitable, but the encroaching darkness prevented them from seeing that far. They had approached the house cautiously, their guns drawn. Kate could hear her heart beating in her ears. There was no sign of life or walker at the front of the property, and they made their way to the house where Kate slowly took the four steps leading up to a long narrow porch. Hershel stopped halfway up, his left hand holding a flashlight that at dusk did little to light up the front of the house, and a gun in his right. Like she had been trained Kate knocked loudly on one of the windows, waiting for any growling to come from the other side. Nothing. She moved to the large, white front door and pulled the screen open.

"Looks like someone broke in at some point." She pointed to where a crowbar had damaged the wooden casing of the door. "Maybe the place will be clear."

"Be careful Kate." Hershel warned. "Whoever went in may still be in there, alive or not quite."

Kate turned the knob and the door easily gave way, the previous forced entry leaving the lock useless. If they were going to stay here they'd have to figure out a way to secure the door. Kate stepped into the small living room of the quiet house, Hershel's flashlight lighting their path. They quickly cleared the front room and the adjacent kitchen and dining room before setting their sights on the hallway that presumably led to the bedrooms.

"Bethie, you sit on that couch with Judith and we'll clear the place." Hershel instructed.

Beth limped to the large couch, it was covered in a cheap velveteen fabric with a large floral print in browns and rust. She settled into the far corner, her back to the wall, Judith comfortable on her lap. Kate and Hershel cleared the bedrooms, three of them in total, and the bathroom. The kitchen had been empty, both of walkers and food. Whoever had gone through this place before, and it very likely was one of their own group sometime in the last year, had done a thorough job of clearing out anything edible. Hershel found a pillowcase in the linen closet and tore it into long strips to wrap Beth's swelling ankle as best he could. He shoved a pillow from the couch under her leg and ordered her to stay put. Kate pushed the love seat in front of the door, hoping if something tried to come through it, it would at least slow it down.

At the far side of the house, opposite the hall of bedrooms, was a door leading into a musty garage. There was enough scrap wood to secure the windows and doors, but they elected to not draw attention with the sounds of hammering. If they stayed here for any length of time it might be worth it, but for the night it seemed safer to keep quiet. They returned to find Judith asleep on Beth's shoulder.

"I'll take first watch, out here." Hershel said. "You guys go and try and get some sleep."

"You sure Daddy?" Beth asked. "I don't think you got much sleep the past couple nights."

"No, but Judith is asleep now and so you should sleep while you can and Kate, you're still weak. You need to get some rest, for you and the baby."

The girls didn't argue, just headed down the dark hallway to the comfort of soft beds. Despite her exhaustion, Kate had her doubts about being able to sleep. This morning it had worn her out to just go up the stairs, and then she'd spent the better part of the day traipsing through the woods. Her body was done, she was sore and weary. She felt like she was depleted of every nutrient, and then realized there was some truth to that. She'd barely eaten anything yesterday and today there had only been a couple granola bars split between the four of them. But more than anything she felt profound loss. Their home had been destroyed. The home they had worked so hard to create. But they could get through it, mourn, find somewhere else to live and rebuild. Even if it meant wandering for seven months again. But without Daryl none of that mattered to her. She felt utterly lost, vulnerable and heartbroken.

When they were coming up with their emergency escape plan, why hadn't anyone thought to suggest a meeting place? Hadn't they learned their lesson after the fall of the farm? They had come so close to losing each other then, how had they allowed themselves to be in this awful situation.

For the first time since she'd known Daryl they were separated with neither of them knowing where the other one was. The world suddenly felt gigantic. Hot tears stung her eyes and her nose started to run, irritating her throat and causing her to cough. She sat up in a stranger's bed, trying to catch her breath and calm herself down. She took a deep breath and chastised herself. Crying wasn't going to help her find Daryl and neither was being holed up in this house. She needed to pull herself together, come up with a plan and get some sleep.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

-Daryl-

He stayed until the end. He wasn't about to leave, not until there wasn't another one of the Governor's men to kill. He'd put a bolt through the prick that was driving the tank. The man had raised his hands in surrender, like there was any chance mercy could be shown to someone who'd been responsible for tearing down their home. He wouldn't say he'd enjoyed killing the guy, but he felt a sense of justice as he hit his mark and watched the asshole's face turn to shock.

The last he saw of Kate, she and Beth were getting on the bus with Judith. As soon as he knew she was on board he had been able to concentrate on the enemy as they made their way up to the prison. He was so relieved when the bus tore out of the courtyard, at least that part of their plan had worked.

Now the walkers were pouring through the downed fences and the dead were beginning to turn. Daryl looked around and there was no one left. No one left to kill. No one left that he knew. It was time for him to go, time for him to catch up with the bus and figure out what they would do next.

He jogged around the back of the prison and out their escape route. The bus had left deep tracks in the sticky mud and he kept up his pace as he continued along its path off the prison grounds. The tire tracks led onto the paved road and Daryl followed, all the while replaying the images of the prison fall over and over in his head. Anger coursed through his body, it numbed him. It felt right and kept him moving quickly in the direction of the bus. Kate would be there and then maybe he'd allow himself to feel something else. As he moved down the road, he thought about all the things they should have done differently. He wondered if it would have made any difference if he'd let Carl try to take down the Governor before he'd had a chance to kill Tyreese. The image of the sword hacking into the big man's neck would stay with him forever and he wondered who else they had lost today. He recalled Michonne on her knees in the grass outside of the prison, hands tied behind her back and wondered if there was anyway she was still alive. He doubted it. Michonne had been right all along about the Governor's return. Could they have found him if Daryl had kept going out searching for him? It was impossible to know, but it was a question Daryl would always ask himself.

It was hard to say just how far he had gone when he rounded the small bend and found the bus parked at an angle across a small, paved road. The back door hung open like a gaping mouth and there were bodies strewn around it. He fought the urge to vomit and ran towards the bus. About 25 yards out he came to a stop, the whole scene reminded him too much of discovering Merle. He took a step towards the bodies and then groaned, turning around in place and dragging his hands down his face, trying to ready himself for the discovery he was sure he would make. He considered the possibility of finding her gone and let out a guttural sound that echoed off the trees. He came upon the first body and reached down, grabbing at the shoulder of the man's jacket, turning him onto his back. He stood quickly, recognizing the face of someone from the prison. The man had turned at some point, but there was a stab wound through his eye that had put him down for good. He checked the rest of the bodies scattered across the leaf littered road and it was all the same, people he knew turned to walkers, all with head wounds. Something had happened on that bus, people had to fight to live and by the look of it a lot of them lost. He glanced up into the back of the long vehicle and it seemed to go on forever, rows and rows of seats where Kate could still be. He climbed into the back, his stomach churning, his heart thundering against his chest. He stood at the last row, eyes darting from seat to seat, looking for movement, listening for sound. Nothing. He moved forward, knife in hand, his crossbow strapped on his back as it bounced against the blood covered vinyl seats as he checked each row. Each body. There was no sign of Kate. No sign of Beth or Judith or anyone else from C Block. He stepped over the walker that lay between the driver's seat and the exit and jumped out. There was a body on the ground, just outside the folding door and the fear rose up in him again, but it wasn't her either. He leaned against the side of the bus, the metal just hot enough from baking in the sun to make him forget for a second how afraid he had been.

Whatever had happened, it seemed like Kate and Beth, and whoever else in their group had made it onto the bus, had also fought their way off of it with Judith in tow. But where were they now? Which way had they gone? It seemed logical that they might continue down the same path they were headed and so he did too.

He followed the road for miles, keeping his tracker eyes trained for anything that would give him a clue that this had been the direction they had taken. A paved road, no matter how overgrown and unkept, was really not the easiest place to pick up a trail and so he had been going on assumption more than anything. He knew he was faster than they were and at first that made him confident. He shouldn't have any difficulty catching up with them now that they were moving on foot. But too much time had passed and Daryl had covered too many miles without seeing a sign of anyone. He'd decided to head back towards the bus, cutting towards a stream he knew was east of the road. The walkers had been thinner nearer the prison, most likely because the fight had drawn most of them in, but here, further out, there were more and eventually a herd forced him deeper into the woods.

Daryl woke the next morning in a deer stand. It was a simple steel structure, although still nicer than any of the crude ones his dad had ever put up. There were two chairs bolted to its floor that made laying out to sleep a little difficult. He'd found it just before the sun had completely slipped away, high in a tree, its ladder still in place. He was lucky to have come across it as he had just been contemplating the prospects of a night wandering with only the light of the moon. It was too risky to sleep on the ground without having someone to take turns on watch with and he was concerned that in the dark woods, he would miss a sign that any of his people had been through here. Once he'd settled down on the cold metal floor of the stand, he stared up at the stars in the darkening sky. They made him feel small in a big world. He wondered where Kate was. If she had a roof over her head or if she was out in the open too. He couldn't believe they'd found themselves separated and felt angry, at no one in particular, that they hadn't planned better for this sort of situation. Sleep came slowly and never completely and he woke with first light feeling unrested. He wasted no time, climbing down from the tree and heading back towards the creek in the hopes that others might gravitate to the water as well.

-Kate-

Beth's ankle bloomed purple and pink and had swollen to grotesque proportions. Kate and Hershel looked at it, propped up on a cheap velveteen pillow, with concern.

Kate shifted Judith in her arms and looked at Hershel for his opinion. They were holed up in a house with no food. The only water they had left was in a final bottle for Judith. They already knew that as a group they were at a disadvantage, but the ankle left them almost entirely helpless. There was no way Beth could walk on it, much less run if they ran into trouble.

"I'll go check the medicine cabinets, see if I can find any Aspirin for it Bethie." Hershel said, moving slowly out of the room and disappearing down the hall. Kate could tell the hours they had spent in the woods the day before had taken its toll on Hershel. The prosthetic leg, although great for moving around the prison, wasn't practical for long distances. Michonne had brought it back from a run, and Hershel had made some tweaks to it, but it still was a leg specially designed for another man's body.

Beth looked at Kate apologetically. It never felt good to feel like the weak link.

"What are we going to do? We can't stay here. We have nothing." Panic had taken over Beth's voice and Kate didn't blame her.

"I'm going to go and find us some stuff."

"Kate, you can't go alone."

"I can. What choice do we have? Besides, if I'm out there maybe I'll find the rest of them. We aren't going to find them hidden inside."

Hershel walked back into the room, shaking a small bottle in between his fingers.

"Can you swallow pills without any water?"

Beth nodded and held out her hand. He shook two white, round pills into her open palm and she tossed them into her mouth, swallowing hard and grimacing.

"Daddy, tell Kate she can't go out by herself. It isn't safe."

She was sure Hershel would try and talk her out of it and she was prepared to plead her case, but he surprised her.

"I don't like the idea of you out there by yourself, but I don't know if we have much of a choice. I'm hoping you don't have to go too far, maybe one of the nearby houses. If we can buy ourselves a few days then we can come up with a long term plan."

Kate's long term plan was to find the group. To find Daryl. She fully intended to do so and even if Hershel had tried to stop her she wouldn't have listened, so there was relief in knowing that he also thought it was the best chance they had.

A few minutes later and she was pulling the couch away from the front door. With no supplies to pack, there was no reason to sit around and wait. She had her gun, her knife and the prayers of Beth and Hershel and that was as good as it was going to get. She'd emptied Beth's backpack onto the couch and put the empty pack on, hoping it would be filled on her return. She stood on the porch and looked onto the large front yard at the overgrown grass and the shady trees and tried to decide which direction to head. There were fences on either side of the property and she hoped that meant there were neighbors - or at least that there had been. There was a long, black driveway that ran down the side of the property and met the small road that ran in front of the house. Across that was a stable and further back a burned out building that had been a house or a barn. She climbed down the porch steps and waved goodbye to Hershel.

The morning was already warm and it wasn't long until she felt the sting of sweat under her arms. As badly as she wanted to find Daryl, she wasn't a fool. She'd required IV fluids less than 48 hours ago and she'd find herself in bad shape quickly if she wasn't careful. She'd slept fairly well last night, despite being in a strange place, but she was still exhausted.

Kate had never gone on a solo run before. Being out of options did miraculous things in the courage department, but she was still uneasy out here with nothing to hear but the sound of her own feet and the songbirds. The first house she came upon, the closest neighbor to their temporary home, had a few walkers ambling about the yard and she decided to continue onto the next spot. She told herself she could check it out on the way back if it was necessary, but why tempt fate. It was another half a mile before she came to the edge of the next property. There was a small brick house set back about 50 yards from the road. The lawn was littered with the plastic toys of small kids and Kate hoped with her entire heart that she wouldn't have to put down any children who had turned. She cut across the grass diagonally, trying to move quietly, scanning her surroundings and nervously looking behind her more times than necessary. Her knife was in her hand and she suddenly imagined tripping over her feet and falling on her own weapon, left to bleed to death. She shook her head, as if she could physically remove the idea from her brain. Her own mind could be her worst enemy. The porch was thick with spiderwebs and dirt. The door was locked, and held no sign of forced entry. She didn't have a crowbar and for a minute she stood there helplessly, trying to think of what to do next. She moved to the large window in the front of the house and knocked loudly four times. Immediately she heard the familiar snarl from somewhere inside the house. She knocked again and rotten fingers thrashed at the blinds, poking into view between the slats. There seemed to be only one and summoning her courage she smashed the butt of her gun through the window pane. The walker tried to push its way through immediately, but the blinds slowed it down enough for Kate to kill it. She listened carefully for the sounds of anything else from inside the house, but was met with silence. She busted the rest of the glass out with the gun and slowly climbed through the window, pushing the mangled blinds out of the way and stepping over the walker.

The smell of rotting flesh was strong and the house was dark and dusty, but other than that it looked like the typical house of a growing family. There were bins of toys against the wall in the living room, cereal bowls still on the table and a collection of children's shoes by the front door. Kate moved from room to room to clear the house, stopping short of opening the bedroom doors. She didn't want to know what desperation and fear had forced a mother to do.

Being alone in the house was unnerving and she returned to the window several times to make sure the body remained where she'd left it and glanced out nervously to see if she had drawn the attention of anyone or anything else.

The kitchen was small and square with a sink full of dishes and a refrigerator covered with the scribbled masterpieces of a toddler. She opened the cupboards, digging through the contents of each for something they could use. They were mostly bare, evidence of a family who had tried to survive for sometime before giving up. She dropped a package of Ramen noodles, an expired can of olives and a half empty package of rice cakes into the backpack. There wasn't any water to be found, she even dared to open the refrigerator door, hoping against hope there would be something to drink left in there, but there was none. She wondered if it was running out of water that ended up being the final straw for the dead woman lying under the window. She zipped up the pack, ducked back through the window and headed on.

Most the houses in the immediate area had been picked through and she returned to Hershel and Beth that afternoon discouraged and with little to show for her efforts. In one of the houses she did find a half filled pitcher of water in among the rotting refrigerator food and she had poured it into a tupperware container she found in a drawer. They had enough formula to make a few more bottles for Judith with it. There was also a couple cans of corn and a package of crackers.

That night they sat at the oak dining table spooning out room temperature corn and olives and drinking the juice from the cans. It was far from appetizing, but it was all they had.

Kate pulled the corn can from her lips, her face collapsing in disgust as she swallowed the cloudy, room temperature liquid. "I'll go back out tomorrow, head the other direction."

Hershel nodded gravely and Beth remained quiet. Judith seemed to be the only one unaware of how compromised their situation was.

She went Southeast, or at least that was the direction Hershel said it was when they stood on the porch the next morning and she pointed out to him where she was headed. She depended on landmarks, Southeast meant little to her. With about six olives in her stomach and two rice cakes in her pack, she marched down the deserted road that led outside of the immediate area the house was in. She stayed towards the middle, where the yellow line divided the narrow, two lane drive, not too close to the trees and overgrown bushes that lined each side of the hilly, black street. If a walker was going to come at her, she wanted plenty of time to see it. Out here in the eerie silence, Kate felt utterly alone and she thought about those who had joined their prison group after weeks by themselves and wondered how they hadn't lost their minds. It was worse than being in the woods, because at least there silence seemed natural. Abandoned roads gave her the creeps and this one was no exception. She passed the time imagining that Daryl and the rest of their group would be just over the next rise in the road. She pictured herself running into his arms and returning to the small house to reunite Hershel and Beth with Maggie and Glenn.

Hours had past and she hadn't had much luck. It seemed that all the houses in the area had been cleared at some point and she was starting to panic. If she didn't find something soon, what would they do? Maybe they could get a car going and head to a different area? She didn't know how to hotwire a car, and she wondered if Hershel could or if they'd have any luck finding keys. She was cutting across a field that joined two properties, hoping the next house would hold the answer to her prayers, when she spotted the little tree dotted with yellow. She almost came to a full stop, squinting to make sure she was seeing it right and then breaking out into a jog. The apple tree wasn't very big, and she could easily reach up to pull the ripe fruit from its branches. She crouched down and unzipped the backpack, placing a couple apples inside and biting into another. The juice dribbled down her chin and she wiped it away with the sleeve of her shirt. She was sure she'd never tasted an apple so delicious. At the very least, they'd have fruit to eat. They could even mash some up for Judith.

The dog's bark was loud and deep and Kate swung around, startled, dropping the apples from her hands and pulling her knife. It was running at her full speed, a big white dog that clearly was not happy to find her in this field. The weakness in her knees reminded her that a long time ago she had been afraid of dogs, but she steadied herself and prepared to kill it if it insisted on attacking her. It had almost reached her when a man's voice rang out.

"WILLIE! WILLIE! "

The dog, Willie she presumed, came to a stop where he continued to bark in her direction. A man came through the trees that created a natural fence behind the house she was headed towards. He was tall and thin with shoulder length brown hair that fell in lifeless strands and a scraggly beard. He cradled a shotgun and he was pointing it towards her as he quickly closed the distance between the house and where she stood. He stopped alongside the dog, patting its head and praising the animal before taking another step toward her.

"Drop your knife."

Kate let it fall at her feet.

"You have any other weapons? Now's the time to tell me."

Kate shook her head.

"You alone? You have people?"

"I, I, I'm alone, here." Kate struggled to find her voice and her mind was racing. Strategy wasn't her strong suit and she was afraid to say something that would get her in trouble. "I'm staying in a house not too far from here with a couple others. We got separated from our group."

"You're on my property. Those are my apples." His voice was calm and although he was holding a gun, there was a kindness about him.

"I didn't know." She shook her head to emphasize her point and her hands were raised in surrender. "Haven't seen anyone new for days. I've been searching all the houses, looking for water and food."

The man eyed her carefully and then looked over his shoulder towards his home. The dog sat, seeming to wait for his master to make a decision about this stranger. Kate noticed the mutt only had one eye.

"How'd you get separated from your group?"

"We were attacked."

"The dead?"

"No. People, living ones. We fought back, a lot of people died and those of us that survived got separated."

"Shouldn't be out here on your own. You said you were with others, why aren't they with you?"

She didn't know what to say. She was afraid to let him know that the only people that knew her general whereabouts were both incapable of coming after her, but there was part of her that trusted this man already. Daryl would have told her that she couldn't afford to trust.

"We have a baby with us." She settled on half the truth.

"Yours?"

"No." And then after a pause. "But I'm pregnant."

The man lowered the gun immediately, as if he was disgusted that he'd ever raised it at her.

"You can take the apples." He said, defeated, and turned to head towards the house, whistling for Willie to follow him. It took Kate a couple seconds to start thinking straight again.

"Wait! Please, wait." She called out after his retreating figure as she rushed towards him. He stopped and turned back.

"Do you know if there is a creek or something around here? We don't have any water."

Something about the way he knit his eyebrows over his hound dog eyes made him look troubled, but he nodded quickly.

"Wait here. I'll be right back."

Kate stood in the middle of the field watching him head back to the house with Willie at his side. When he was out of sight she returned to the apple tree and put several more in her pack. She retrieved her knife and the apple she had started from the ground, wiping it off on her shirt and finishing it off.

It had been about 15 minutes before the man returned and he'd brought a woman back with him. They were several yards away when he waved Kate towards them and she jogged over to catch up. She said hi to the woman, who only nodded back, a shrewd look on her pretty face. She had strawberry blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail and a lean, muscular body that reminded her of Maggie's. The man was carrying an empty plastic jug, the kind you would buy water from the store in. One eyed Willie was at their side, wagging his tail.

"We're taking you up to a stream about two miles away. You can fill this up and take it back to wherever it is you've been staying."

His long legs caused him to cover ground quickly, although he looked like he was taking a leisurely stroll. Kate struggled to keep up.

"Don't think I introduced myself before." He said over his shoulder, without slowing. "I'm Josh and this is my wife, Allison."

"I'm Kate. Thank you both so much for this." She directed her comment at the woman, hoping to show she wasn't a threat.

"So Josh tells me you're pregnant? That seems like a risky decision given the world we live in."

Her acerbic tone caught Kate off guard, but the woman had a right to be cautious. Kate was lucky strangers were willing to help her at all and if they were less than polite she would get over it.

"Wasn't exactly planned." Kate replied, she figured that answer would satisfy most, but it just seemed to piss Allison off. The woman rolled her eyes and shook her head incredulously, not seeming to care if Kate noticed. Kate bit her tongue, not forgetting how these people were saving their lives.

"Where's the daddy? He back at the house with this other baby you got with you?"

"My husband? No, our group was attacked and we were separated from one another. I'm searching for him, as well as for food and water."

Josh looked at her sympathetically and even Allison seemed to back off.

They walked in silence for awhile before Allison spoke up again, slightly gentler this time.

"Who attacked your group? Were you in a house?"

"We were living in a prison. Had been there for months, had a real community going on."

Josh cut her off, "The one just north of Highway 34?"

Kate thought that sounded right. "The West Georgia Correctional Facility? Ya, we came across it about 10 months after the fall. We've been there ever since. We had a lot of people too, we were growing food. When we first arrived a couple of our people were kidnapped while on a supply run and were taken to a town run by a lunatic. He called himself The Governor. Our group became his enemy when the rescue turned violent. He'd attacked us back then, when we hadn't been there for very long, but it failed and he ended up turning on his people and gunning a lot of them down. We took in the rest of the town and he disappeared. We thought we had seen the last of him, it had been over 6 months, but two days ago he showed up at our gates with a tank and a dozen armed people and destroyed everything."

"How'd you and your husband end up separated?"

"There was an escape plan, in case we ever had to evacuate. We were supposed to get on this bus. Daryl, that's my husband, he was with some of the others fighting off The Governor's people. I had gotten to the bus with Beth, she's one of the ones who I got out with, and she realized that none of the children were there. We went rushing back inside and by the time we got out the bus was gone and no one was there."

"Your husband left on the bus without you?" Allison looked angry again, but this time Kate felt it was in defense of her.

"Daryl wouldn't have, no. But I bet he thought I was on it, he would've tried to follow it. We tried to follow it too, but we weren't sure where it had headed and then we ran into a herd of walkers and were pushed into the woods. Spent the whole first night just trying to find a place to stay safe."

The ground suddenly sloped in front of them and Willie went galloping into the stream, wagging his tail happily and lapping at the water. Josh crouched down at the edge and uncapped the plastic jug and began filling it. Kate dropped her pack on the spongy forest floor and dug past the apples to the tupperware container and two baby bottles she had brought along in case she was lucky enough to find something to fill them with.

Minutes later the containers were filled and Kate began to thank them again.

"Why don't you continue on with us as far as the house." Josh started and Allison shot him an annoyed look. "It really isn't a good idea to be out here alone."

Kate smiled, it was a big relief to her and the fact that these strangers had showed her such kindness, or at least tolerance, made the situation she was in a little more bearable.

That night, after she returned to Hershel and Beth, they dined on apples, water and peanut butter. Just as she had said her last goodbyes to Josh and Allison, he had pulled a jar of it out of his pack and handed it to her.

"Protein. Not much, but you need it."

After eating by candlelight, Hershel sat bouncing Judith on one knee.

"I was thinking, since we have a little bit of food Kate, you might take a break and stick around here tomorrow."

Kate shook her head. "I can't. Daryl is somewhere out there looking for us and he won't find us in here."

Hershel nodded. "I had a feeling you were going to say that and there is no need to explain. I understand, I only wish we could help you more."

He handed Judith to Beth and stood with some difficulty, picking up a map from the arm of the couch. He limped across the living room and spread it across the dining room table. Working by candle light, he took a black felt tip marker, drew a circle on the map and pointed at it.

"This is where the prison is." He drew another circle several inches away from the first. "And this is where we are now."

Kate stood above the map, arms crossed, and studied the shapes and lines that made up the greater Atlanta area.

"Let's see if we can figure out a search plan." Hershel said.

For the third day in a row, Kate rose early and headed out the front door. In her backpack was a small bottle of water, an empty container, an apple and Hershel's map. They'd come up with a plan together last night that had her moving towards the prison, although not taking her quite that far.

She made it to the end of the property when she stopped in her tracks. Standing next to the mailbox stood Josh and Allison, Willie lounging on the long grass.

"Thought you could use some help lookin' for your husband." Josh said with a good natured nod, Allison stood impassively at his side picking at her nails.

Kate grinned. "I definitely could!"

Josh motioned towards the long road ahead of them, "Then lead the way."


	36. Chapter 36

**\- DARYL -**

Daryl knew loneliness better than most.

He grew up in a home with people who considered him only when he became too inconvenient to keep ignoring. He didn't have a single memory after his mother died of anyone asking him how he felt or how his day had been. Once, after he'd left home, one of Merle's girlfriends asked him how work was going and though he'd only grunted in response he'd nursed a crush for the woman much longer than Merle gave her a thought.

He'd been closer to Merle than he'd been to anyone, and there was a companionship between the two of them, borne out of necessity and the fact that they were the only ones that really knew what they had come from, but there was still this gaping hole that Daryl didn't even knew existed until he'd found himself part of Rick's group.

At first he tried to deny it, after all he'd spent years building defense mechanisms he wasn't even aware of. He acted like he didn't care about anyone, like it didn't matter to him if they fell off the face of the Earth, but he had every opportunity to leave them and he never did.

At the quarry camp, after Merle was gone, Daryl could have gone stalking off into the woods or searching for his brother. Either would have made more sense than sticking with a group that treated him like an unpredictable criminal, but when they pulled up stakes and headed to the CDC he went with them.

When they found themselves at Hershel's farm, a group at war with each other, the furthest he could manage to remove himself was the edge of the property and even then he knew he wasn't going to leave. The thought of being on his own worse than sticking around and being part of a group tearing itself apart from the inside out. He'd stayed, endured being insulted by Shane, manipulated by Lori and even filled the role of group torturer if that is what it took to be valued.

The months they had wandered after the fall of the farm had been grueling. They were cold and hungry more times than not and he didn't think there was a single day in those seven months that he didn't have to kill a walker. But still, sadly, he couldn't remember a time in his life before where he had felt more content. For the first time in his life people wanted him around.

Their time at the prison had easily been the best months of his life, despite the death and uncertainty around them. He'd grown to think of their group as his family and for the first time in his life his loneliness ceased to exist. This made the fact that it was senselessly torn away from them even more painful for Daryl.

The anger he felt about losing the first real home he had ever known was eclipsed only by the pain he felt without Kate and it both kept him going and threatened to drown him. She remained on his mind at all times with mornings filling him with renewed hope that today would be the day he'd find her and the nights a black hole of desolation that he'd fall inside until sleep rescued him.

Daryl stood on his knees at the edge of the stream and brought his cupped hands to his lips. He pulled the cold water into his mouth and swallowed. He sat back on his heels and looked across the moving current to the woods on the other side and wondered where they all had gone. He tried to ignore the ache in his chest, but it felt like it would swallow him whole. He'd spent four nights alone and five days searching for them. He hadn't found a single shred of evidence that any of them had been here. They'd vanished. Loneliness was so much worse when you actually knew what you were missing.

He stood and headed back into the woods, towards the railroad tracks. He'd come across them this morning, shortly after dawn. He didn't have a great reason to follow them, except that they led somewhere and that was better than where he'd been. And while he felt at home in the woods, he thought others might prefer the flat and cleared path the tracks provided.

He stayed on them for most of the day, but from time to time he would veer into the woods to look for a squirrel or rabbit. He wasn't hungry exactly, he'd kept himself fed easily enough, but the monotony of the tracks had started to get to him and the woods provided some relief. He'd just returned to the rails when he spotted a body up ahead. Bodies were easy enough to come by these days, but he'd been paying closer attention since he'd been trying to find the group, hoping he wouldn't find someone he knew, but forcing himself to look anyway.

As he drew closer he could see it was a walker, female. She was lying to the side of a white, metal shed, the kind that maintenance workers used to house electrical equipment. As it was adjacent to the tracks, he figured the shed belonged to the railroad. There was a large sign hanging on the side of it and he assumed it said as much, but as he moved towards it he saw that it was handmade - two signs, one hanging above the other.

 **SANCTUARY**

 **FOR ALL.**

 **COMMUNITY**

 **FOR ALL.**

 **THOSE WHO ARRIVE**

 **SURVIVE**

Below that was a map of the area with a large star in the center and a single word: TERMINUS.

He stood in front of it for a long time.

Community for all? They'd had a community. They'd offered sanctuary for those who needed it. It was real and it was good, but the Governor offered community too and in the end he'd slaughtered most of those who thought he'd provided them with sanctuary. Daryl was wary of strangers, always had been. His experience with most 'community' wasn't all the great either. If it was just him he wouldn't give the place a second thought, he'd walk into the woods and live off the land. But he wanted his people. He wanted Kate. Would they have gone there?

He headed back towards the tracks, stepping around the walker and weighing his options. He looked over his shoulder again, towards the sign and that was when he spotted it. Scrawled in walker blood across the front of the shed:

 **" _GLENN_**

 ** _GO TO TERMINUS_**

 ** _MAGGIE"_**

Goosebumps erupted over his dirt covered skin . He approached the sign cautiously, as if it would disappear into thin air if he moved too quickly. This meant Maggie and Glenn were separated too. Glenn had just started breathing on his own the morning of the attack, surely someone would have helped him onto the bus. So maybe Kate, Beth and Judith were with Glenn. Maybe they had seen these signs and were making their way to Terminus, whatever that was, right now. It was all he needed to make up his mind, he didn't have another plan.

That night he found an abandoned building adjacent to the tracks and although there was still daylight, he didn't know if he'd find anyplace safer to stay. He'd continued to see the Terminus signs and Maggie continued to leave her messages for Glenn. Each one a reassurance that she had made it that far.

The second night there had been a vehicle abandoned on the tracks and he stayed there, eating a squirrel raw and washing it down with a bottle of Gatorade he'd found on the floorboard. He'd pushed the seat back as far as it would go and stared out the windows at the tops of trees as they moved against the night sky. The familiar embrace of loneliness wrapped around him like an old coat and he wondered for the millionth time where Kate was and whether she was safe. Daryl had never been one to share his feelings, but she had this way of working them out of him. Even before they had been together he found himself telling her things that he never thought he'd tell anyone. He wished she was here now, that he could talk to her about all of this. He wished he thought praying worked.

Darkness had already fallen on the third day. A day that had brought more Terminus signs, but none of Maggie's. It was troubling, but he hoped it meant that she'd found Glenn along the trail as he hoped to find Kate. Daryl was looking for a place to bed down for the night when he got a whiff of smoke. At first he thought it was his imagination, God knew there had been many times over the last few days where he'd thought he heard a voice or saw someone through the thick trees. This would be no different, he was sure. Merle used to tell him stories of men losing their minds in solitary confinement, maybe he had been by himself too long. But eventually it was too strong to deny and Daryl decided to head towards the smell with a cautious hope - hope that he'd finally caught up with them and this long, lonely nightmare would be over.

He worked his way quietly through the woods, he didn't have to remind himself that it was just as likely he'd find a stranger poking at a fire than someone he knew. Daryl had no interest in making a friend and he didn't need any enemies. He could barely smell the smoke anymore and might have moved on, except he thought he saw something through the trees. He crept closer. Barely visible in the light of the moon was an old truck, maybe a Suburban and he could make out shadowy figures hunched down in front of its bumper. He crouched and moved silently from tree to tree, crossbow held out in front of him and ready, until he was close enough to make out the faces. Rick and Michonne sat on a log, talking in low voices. Relief flooded through him, his muscles, which had been tense and posed for fight, relaxed and he stood to his full height, letting his crossbow fall to his side as he headed towards his friends with a sigh of relief.

He'd almost made it to the road when two figures emerged from behind Rick and Michonne and Daryl drew back into the shadows of the trees cursing under his breath as he realized he recognized the men.

"Oh deary me." A familiar voice boomed, as Daryl watched the man who had terrorized him and Kate press his pistol against Rick's temple. "You screwed up asshole. You hear me? You screwed up."

The other man, the one with the blue bandana wrapped around his head, the one who had 'claimed' Kate, kicked Michonne's sword away and pointed his weapon at her. Joe began again.

"Today is the day of reckoning sir. Restitution. The balance of the whole damn universe. Shit and I was thinking of turning in for the night."

Daryl raised his crossbow and aimed it at Joe, hoping Rick or Michonne would be quick enough to stop his man when Joe hit the ground. Joe had started counting down the seconds until he would blow Rick's brains out, "Ten Mississippi, Nine Mississippi….", so Daryl didn't hear the two men behind him until the gun was pressed into his spine and he was pushed through the trees and out onto the road.

The last time he had seen Joe, the man was storming through the woods in a murderous rage, hell bent on killing Daryl and doing God knows what to Kate for killing his men. Men who were clearly easy to replace since he was being pushed into the clearing by people he'd never seen before. He saw the glee light up Joe's face when he saw who they'd found and fear eddyed in the pit of his stomach.

"Well, well, well...this night just keeps getting better and better." Joe said with that sardonic grin Daryl remembered all too well. "It's Daryl, right? Where's that pretty little bitch that was followin' you around, Daryl? You didn't let her get gobbled up now did ya?"

Joe laughed and his men quickly joined in. Daryl clenched his teeth together, his jaw tensing. The gun was still pressed against Rick's temple and Daryl knew he didn't have the luxury of anger. He wouldn't fool himself, he knew there was no way Joe would let him live, but he hoped they wouldn't all have to die.

"Joe." Daryl started. "Hold up."

One of the pricks that dragged Daryl out of the woods spoke up from behind him.

"This is the guy that killed Lew, so we got nothin' to talk about."

Daryl wondered which of the men they'd killed had been Lew.

"The thing about nowadays is we got nothing but time. Say your peace Daryl."

Daryl looked from Joe's sickly amused face, to the gaunt, fearful stare of Rick and Michonne. All eyes were on him and he didn't know where to start. How to beg a sadist that had nothing but revenge on the brain to spare the lives of people he loved. He caught movement in the distance and looked towards the truck. His blood ran cold as he stared at the face of a man he'd left for dead. Carl sat panicked in the cab as the man pressed his rodent-like face to the glass and leered at the boy. Daryl hesitated, unnerved by the man's presence.

"What's wrong Daryl? You look like you've seen a ghost." Joe said, with a laugh. "Guess you ain't as good at killin' people as you thought."

"Joe, these people, you're gonna let 'em go. It's me you want. These people ain't done nothin'"

The collected, calm veneer fell from Joe's face for a brief second.

"Now, I, I, I, think Lew would disagree with you on that. I'll of course have to speak for him and all cause your friend here strangled him in a bathroom."

Shit. That complicated things.

"You want blood. I get it." He said, lowering his bow to the ground slowly and standing with his arms out in surrender. "Take it from me man. Come on."

He had nothing to offer except himself. He knew it wasn't likely to work, they were going to kill him anyway, why would they spare the others, but he had to try.

Joe's face, normally alive with brutality, fell flat. He looked bewildered, as if Daryl was speaking another language.

"This man killed our friend. We ain't lettin' anyone go.' And with the power of judge and jury he laid down Daryl's sentence. "Take him boys"

Defeat crumpled Daryl's face. He had nothing left to give and he knew what came next. The butt of the gun smashed into his gut and he felt the air leave his lungs. As they dragged him backwards, kicking and fighting for his life, he heard Rick yell out. The rabbit he'd eaten earlier threatened to come back up as they threw him against the hood of the vehicle, pummeling him with their fists and feet.

He could hear voices around him. Rick's. Joe's. The angry exaltations of his executioners. The sound of his body being battered and groans that he quickly realized were his own. He was aware of the ghost dragging Carl out of the truck and despite the pain and fear he felt, the thought of Carl at the mercy of these men brought a new level of terror.

They pulled him away from the hood and threw him to the ground. He could taste the blood in his mouth and he struggled to breathe, to block the boots that were breaking his body. He could hear Joe laughing.

Daryl's lungs begged for air, and he felt his consciousness threaten to slip away as his body sang out in pain.

The gun shot rang out, a loud crack in the middle of the chaos, that brought things back into focus. For a brief moment the beating stopped and Daryl sucked air into his aching chest. He struggled to make sense of what he could spy, his view mostly blocked by the men who loomed over him. He watched Rick fall to the ground and crawl across the dirt, struggling to get to his feet.

"I got him." Joe assured the men, who took it as their cue to continue on their orders to kill Daryl. "Oh it's gonna be so much worse now."

Another gunshot rang out, but this time the men didn't stop. They pulled Daryl to his feet and slammed him once again into the truck, fists raining down on him with no sign of tiring.

A strange scream was what halted the blows, followed by a gurgling sound. Daryl lifted his battered head to see Joe spurting blood from a gaping hole in his throat where his jugular was. Rick spat a mouthful of blood and skin into the air.

Joe's body fell to the ground, making unholy choking sounds. They all stared in shock, trying to make sense of the scene in front of them. Another gunshot rang out and the man in the bandana fell to the ground, a victim of Michonne's quick thinking. It was all Daryl needed to come to his senses and he sent his fist flying into the face of the man to his left. Michonne aimed and shot the other before demanding that the last man standing, the ghost, let Carl go. Daryl turned his attention to the man on the ground. He had flipped onto his stomach, trying to draw his knees up under him in an effort to stand. Daryl kicked him in the ribs and he fell flat in the dirt. With all the energy he could muster, Daryl thrust his boot down onto the man's skull with a sickening crunch. Daryl threw himself against the hood of the truck, leaning on it for support and trying to catch his breath, concern for Carl chief in his mind. But it wasn't necessary, the boy was safe in Michonne's arms, watching as his dad eviscerated the man who dared mess with Rick Grimes son.

* * *

They let Carl sleep. Daryl wasn't sure if any of them were really ready to head out yet. Not after what happened. He didn't sleep, couldn't. His body hurt, nearly every inch of it. They beat him good and he knew he wouldn't have been able to take much more. But Daryl had been beat before and there were many nights he'd gone to bed in pain.

What kept him up tonight was the sheer brutality of it all and trying to grapple with the idea that they lived in a world where a father would have to rip another man's throat out with his teeth in order to keep his son alive. And weighing heavily on his heart was the fact that Kate was somewhere out in that world without him.

They were back on the road early, walking single file down the leaf littered tracks towards a new unknown, even more wary than before. Daryl was relieved to be back with them, even if they were all nearly silent, the events of the night before preventing them from expressing any joy at the reunion. Rick had called him his brother though and that meant more to Daryl than he knew how to express.

They all traded their stories of escaping the prison. Daryl had been anxious for any news of Kate, but they knew no more than he did. Carl was the only other one to see her after the tank tore through the fence and he only knew she was running towards C-Block. Rick had been in bad shape, beaten bloody and nearly strangled by The Governor before Michonne ran the asshole through with her sword. Daryl was almost as relieved to know he was dead as he had been when he knew that Michonne had survived it all. She had left the prison alone, as he did, only meeting up with Rick and Carl a few days before in the house they had holed up in so Rick could recuperate. It was in that same house, while Michonne and Carl were on a run, that Joe's group ran into Rick for the first time and he had to strangle one of their men to escape.

They'd found the signs for Terminus too and were headed there themselves, wondering, as Daryl had, whether it was too good to be true. Daryl told them about Maggie's signs and how he hoped he'd find Kate there and maybe if she was there Judith would be too.

The last sign they found along the tracks was on the ground and covered in leaves, Rick brushed them off with his boot revealing the black star on the map.

"We're gettin' close." Daryl said, glancing down and back up at the rails. "We'll be there before sundown."

"Now we head through the woods." Rick said. "We don't know who they are."

"A'right." Daryl agreed and the four of them turned and headed into the trees.

Daryl was anxious. They were close to Terminus and it wouldn't be long until they knew one way or another if they were friendly or not. Whether Kate would be there or if it was another dead end. If she wasn't there, he wouldn't be staying.

Terminus was a sprawling railway yard, surrounded by chain link and woods. T-E-R-M-I-N-U-S was painted in large black letters across the front of the main building, a giant brick structure that took up the majority of the grounds. There were other buildings too, and train cars dotted around the property where the tracks from all over Georgia converged.

The four of them stood at the fence and peered through the bushes and weeds that had grown up and around the perimeter. There wasn't a soul in sight and the yard remained eerily silent.

"We all spread out, watch for awhile." Rick ordered. "See what we see. Get ready. We all stay close."

Daryl walked along the fence line, careful to stay where the overgrowth would keep him hidden, and crouched, staring down into the cement yard. He wondered if Kate was there, safe in one of the buildings. If this was such a sanctuary, why did it seemed so deserted? The signs along the railroad tracks seemed to have been there for awhile, he expected there to be more life.

They watched for an hour, maybe more. They saw nothing. Nothing that made them feel reassured, nothing that made them think it was a trap and so they stashed their bags in the woods, taking special care to bury their extra weapons, and scaled the fences. They moved in slowly and Daryl led the way across the tracks that curved around the side of the property they came in on and towards a light blue door that stood ajar.

Later, when he thought back on this moment, he realized it had been too easy. That a door hanging open, without anyone standing on guard was spectacularly stupid in this world, and that they were walking right into a trap. But in the moment all he could think of was Kate and that he might be minutes away from being with her again.

They made their way into the building, down a wide, dark hallway of painted white brick until they came to the first opening on the left.

At first glance it reminded him of a military base, or at least the way they looked on TV. Like maybe they had walked onto the set of MASH. There was a large map of the United States suspended from a metal beam, with a smaller map of Georgia taped over it. It hung behind a single metal desk, surrounded by file cabinets. A woman, with white hair and oversized headphones sat there repeating into the microphone the same message they had read on all the signs they saw along the tracks.

"Sanctuary for all. Community for all. Terminus."

Her peaceful voice faded to silence as Rick stalked in and announced their presence with a simple hello.

Once inside, they were standing in a sprawling warehouse. Across the room of metal beams and cement, was a command post of sorts with metal rolling tables and people quietly working on signs. At the sound of Rick's voice they all looked up calmly at the four strangers in their building.

A tall, thin man in a tan jacket stood looking mildly surprised.

"Well, I bet Albert is on perimeter watch." He said, sounding slighting annoyed and throwing his paintbrush down. He walked towards them slowly and Daryl was struck by how undisturbed these people seemed about finding four armed, uninvited people in their space.

"You here to rob us?" He asked.

Daryl couldn't tell if he was joking or not, the man's face remained completely impassive.

"No." Rick said with a firmness that communicated total sincerity. "We wanted to see you before you saw us."

"Makes sense. Usually we do this where the tracks meet." He said, clearing his throat and looking back towards the others that stood staring behind him. "Welcome to Terminus. I'm Gareth."

* * *

 **\- KATE -**

Willie let out a low growl and stood still in the middle of the woods, his eyes fixed on some point in the distance. The dog was remarkably good at sniffing out walkers and Kate learned quickly to trust his warnings. They grew still, listening for the tell tale growl. Sure enough, about 15 yards up, a walker came ambling out from behind the trees, dragging its left leg behind it. Josh moved forward to meet the threat and plunged his knife into its temple. The walker crumpled to the ground. Willie ran up and sniffed it.

Moving through the woods with Josh and Allison was odd for Kate. She trusted them well enough, whether she should or not, and she was incredibly thankful that they were helping her, but they were still strangers. She missed the familiarity of her family: the natural way Daryl moved through the trees, crossbow in his capable hands, his protective ways and the silent communications he and Rick would exchange when they came up against a challenge. Sometimes she expected to look up and see Carl's hat bobbing through the trees. Josh and Allison had spent plenty of time in the woods since the fall and they moved together in a comfortable partnership that reminded her so much of Maggie and Glenn. Everytime she noticed it the ache would squeeze at her heart and a nagging doubt would try to pull her down, whispering that she would never see the people that she loved again.

Josh was as mild as they came, even his face had a serenity about it. He moved slowly, except when the situation required him not to, and he didn't talk much unless he remembered some story he liked to tell. His stories were always funny, self-effacing and never took place after the fall. He managed to reminisce with none of the sorrow that others always seemed to bring to their memories. Allison listened with more patience than most spouses who had heard the same tales over and over. She would occasionally add a comment or roll her eyes, but for the most part she was all business. She remained as cold and distant towards Kate as she had from the moment they met. Josh had told her that they were helping her because if he and Allison ever became separated, he hoped like hell someone would help them. Kate didn't know if Allison actually felt the same way or if she was just going along with Josh, but either way the woman made every effort to make their outings a success. She took over map duties and seemed more decisive than either Kate or Josh about where they should head next.

It was the second day she'd been out searching the woods with Josh and Allison and most the time she tried to stay positive. She had shelter, food and people that were helping her. She could be in much worse shape. Despite that, doubt found ways to prick at her heart in the quiet moments and when it did she tried her best to not let discouragement take over.

The doubt made her question how realistic it was to be searching like they were, combing through the woods, hoping against hope that they'd stumble upon Daryl or someone else from the group. It was a great big world and the prospects of living in it without Daryl would start to creep into her mind. That thought alone was frightening enough in itself, but when she thought about attempting to raise a baby without him it was enough to make her want to give up altogether. She had been afraid of bringing a child into this world from the moment Dr. S had even suggested she might be pregnant and that was when she had a safe home, the promise of food and a survivor by her side. When she thought about these things too much, she started to resent the fact that she was pregnant at all, angry that she was in this situation, and feeling incredibly sorry for herself.

But she couldn't afford to wallow in self-pity. These thoughts wouldn't help her and she would do her best to shake them away and she did it in the only way she knew how - she kept talking.

She filled the silence by telling them about everyone in the group. She wasn't sure if they were actually interested, but they didn't stop her, and she figured she shouldn't be the only one knowing who they were looking for anyway. It made her feel better, remembering everyone in such great detail. She told them all about how she found herself alone, stuck on the road in a rental car, trying desperately to get back to the airport in Atlanta. How when the bombs fell on the city, she followed strangers onto back roads, eventually winding up at a rock quarry tucked into the woods. She told them about the camp and Rick's reunion with Lori and Carl. She mentioned that she had met Daryl in that camp, but left out the part about being afraid of him. She didn't want these people judging him on her own prejudices. They were particularly interested in hearing what they had learned at the CDC and they were shocked to learn that it had blown sky high, almost taking the entire group with them. She described Hershel's farm and as she did she marvelled at how naive they all had been, camping in the open and believing they had found some magical haven. She left out the part about Randall, only saying it was there they learned that the living could be as big of a threat as the dead. She didn't mention the fact that Rick had killed Shane either.

It was hard to talk about the prison, the pain of losing their home in such a sudden and violent way still too fresh. There had been plenty of awful moments behind those gates: Hershel losing his leg, T-Dog and Lori dying, Daryl not returning from Woodbury and the fear of the Governor looming over them. But they had built the cold, cement fortress into a bright and loving home, full of life and promise. It was in that gray prison that she realized she was in love with Daryl. It was in the courtyard, surrounded by concrete that he had kissed her clumsily for the first time and the up in the guard tower that they first made love. He'd told her he loved her and wanted to marry her in the middle of the field, surrounded by walkers lining the fences and a blanket of stars over their heads. They'd watched Judith grow, Carl return to the great kid they knew he was and Maggie and Glenn get married. They hadn't been there that long, but it felt like a lifetime in some ways and she felt the loss deeply, compounded, of course by the fact that the destruction of their home was the reason why she was separated from Daryl at all.

It was on this second day out, around mid morning that Kate had started to feel the first twinges of discomfort, but it wasn't anything she actually worried about.

Carol had given her a book just days after she had started to tell people at the prison that she was pregnant. She remembered, with gratitude, Carol standing in her cell door handing over a thick, dogeared book.

"Thought you might be able to use this." She had said.

Kate had taken the book from Carol's outstretched hand and looked down at the worn paper cover. There was an illustration of a pregnant woman sitting in a rocking chair and the title stood out in big blue letters, "What to Expect When You're Expecting".

"It was Lori's. I think she found it in one of the houses we stayed in that winter. It's been where she left it, in my cell ever since. I keep meaning to take it to the library, but, anyway, I thought you might want it. I had a copy when I was pregnant with Sophia and it was real helpful."

She thanked Carol who gave her a small smile and ducked out of the cell. Kate read almost the entire book that day. She'd always been a fast reader, but suddenly having all the answers she'd wanted for weeks made her particularly motivated. It was much more informative than the archaic book she had found in the prison library. She learned all about what the uterus was doing throughout the weeks of pregnancy, when it was likely that her baby had a heartbeat, and she paid especially close attention to all the little symptoms that had a tendency to scare pregnant women, even if they were perfectly normal.

So she didn't panic when she felt the first little cramps. They were barely noticeable really. They had pushed themselves pretty hard the day before, trying to cover the area between the house they were in and the prison. Hoping in vain to find any sign of Daryl or the rest of the group. She was sure that was the cause, she remembered reading something about feeling crampy as the uterus stretched to accommodate the growing baby. She probably just needed to drink more water. She was determined to cover even more ground today, feeling anxious that the days were quickly passing by without Daryl, and she wasn't going to let a little discomfort stop her.

Within the hour they'd gotten worse. Nothing unbearable, it felt like cramps she'd had on her period before, but she wasn't sure if this fell within the realm of "normal" and she started to worry. They'd stopped on a small road where an abandoned car was pulled over to the shoulder, its tires flat and doors hanging open. Allison spread their map out on the oversized trunk while Josh kept a watchful eye out for walkers. Willie paced along with him, every once in awhile sniffing the air. Kate sat down in the driver's seat with her feet resting on the black paved road. She put her head down and grimaced in pain.

"You ok over there?" Josh asked.

"Ya. I don't think I've been drinking enough water."

Josh grabbed the bottle he'd placed on the trunk and tossed it to her.

"Thanks." She said, catching it and taking a sip. She caught Allison's eye. The woman, who hardly looked her way all day, was examining her curiously. When she caught Kate looking back at her she quickly returned to the map.

"So we're about here." Allison said, pointing to some spot. "We have a decision to make. We either head East of the prison and check out this neighborhood, which would probably get us back to the house pretty close to dark or we could head back now, take a different route home and then tomorrow maybe take the car up Highway 34, go a bit past the prison and go on foot from there."

Allison put a hand on her hip and looked up expectantly. Josh looked at Kate and then up the road.

"I say we try and make it through the neighborhood." He said. "Might as well, we can still take a different route back. I know we'll be cutting it close, but we have the flashlights. Willie'll let us know if anything is near."

They both looked at Kate. She wanted so badly to go with Josh's plan, but the pain was increasing. Maybe it was normal, but if it got worse she wanted to be back at the house and not stranded out here away from supplies and Hershel's medical care.

"I think we need to head back."

Josh looked at her, completely puzzled. "Really? This morning you were all about getting further than we did yesterday."

"I'm not feeling very well, I think I need to get back."

"Like you're sick? Is it something you ate?"

"No." Allison said. "It's the baby, isn't it?"

Kate shook her head. Admitting it out loud causing tears to fill her eyes and run down her cheeks.

Allison quickly folded up the map and stuffed it into her pack.

"Finish that bottle of water." She ordered. "It will help."

Kate saw Allison and Josh exchange a knowing look.

"You feel alright enough to head back now?" Josh asked.

Kate finished the big gulp of water and nodded her head.

The trio started back up the road they way they came, Willie at their side.

"You haven't been having any bleeding, have you?" Allison asked, walking next to Kate for the first time.

Josh walked a little faster, purposefully giving the women some space to talk.

"No. Just cramping, it started this morning, but it wasn't very bad. It's been getting worse for awhile."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't think it was anything at first and I didn't want to turn back too early, I didn't want to waste a day. Plus you guys are out here doing me a favor and I don't want to be the one slowing us down."

Allison shook her head and looked up the road ahead of them.

"Don't worry about us."

Josh and Allison left Kate in the concerned hands of Hershel. They offered to stay or to help out in anyway they possibly could, but Hershel encouraged them to go back home and rest.

"Put your feet up. Maybe you just pushed too hard." Allison had suggested. "You never know with these things. Everything could be fine."

There wasn't much Hershel could do for her either. Staying hydrated and resting up the only two things she could really do besides hope for the best.

Kate made her way back to the bedroom she'd been sleeping in and sat on the bed, untieing her boots and kicking them off. She peeled off her mud caked jeans and her sweatshirt and threw them onto the chair in the corner. She slipped under the sheets and curled into a tight ball, praying that the pain would stop.


	37. Chapter 37

** Author's Note: Chapter 37 does follow some of the scenes straight from the show, I try to keep that at a minimum in my story, or at least try to bring a fresh perspective, but occasionally, in order to provide continuity, I do have to do this. Chapter 37

-DARYL-

Things went bad fast. One minute they were being offered BBQ by a dumb puppy of a man and the next Rick had the guy by the neck, demanding he tell them where he got the watch.

Daryl had been uneasy about the whole place from the beginning. The others were too, he could tell. He was trying to work out exactly why - was it just because they'd been through so much that they didn't trust anyone? Or was it because this Gareth guy seemed so unconcerned about it all? Daryl was pretty sure if four armed people had showed up, unannounced, at the prison that they would be a little less hospitable than Gareth had been with them. Whatever it was, he had been on edge, but it was Rick who noticed the watch. Glenn's watch, the one Hershel gave him back at the farm.

When Rick made his move, Daryl reacted immediately, unquestioningly. He pointed his bow at the woman behind the grill, she was matronly, with a peaceful smile, but she'd gone for her weapon just as quickly as Daryl had, the plate of meat that she was just holding out to them splattered across the ground forgotten.

"Where the hell'd you get this watch?" Rick demanded.

"You want answers, you want anything else, you get 'em when you put down the gun." Alex replied.

Daryl frantically pointed the bow all around the courtyard, trying to determine just how many they were up against. All the Terminus people, who had just seconds ago been sitting casually, eating and talking in low voices, were now standing, staring. Some were pointing weapons.

"I see your man on the roof with a sniper rifle, how goods his aim?" Rick growled, loud enough to be heard, and then lowered his voice and asked Alex again. "Where'd you get the watch?"

Alex didn't answer, or not quick enough for Rick.

"WHERE'D YOU GET THE WATCH!?" Rick yelled.

With fear cracking through his calm facade, Alex addressed the guy on the roof.

"Don't do anything. I have this. Just put it down. Put it down."

His man complied.

Alex's breath was coming through choppy and labored as he spoke to Rick again.

"You listen to me. There's a lot of us…"

Rick cut him off. "Where'd you get the watch?"

"I got it off a dead one. I didn't think he'd need it."

Rick shook his head, unbelieving and tightened his grip around Alex. He swung him around to face a man in riot gear, pointing his gun at them.

"What about the riot gear? The poncho?"

Daryl looked over and saw a woman standing there staring impassively with his poncho swallowing her up. He didn't know how he didn't notice it before.

Gareth's voice sounded from behind them.

"Got the riot gear off a dead cop."

Rick wrenched Alex around to face the man, the gun still at his throat. Gareth stood there calmly, anger simmering just below the surface.

"Found the poncho on a clothesline."

Alex, who's anxiety seemed to have inexplicably increased now that Gareth was here, pleaded with his leader.

"Gareth, we can wait…"

"Shut up Alex."

"You." Rick said to Gareth. "Talk to me."

"What's there left to say? You don't trust us anymore." Gareth said.

"Gareth?" Alex begged.

Daryl found the begging unsettling. If Alex should be begging anyone right now it was Rick. What did he think Gareth was going to do? Daryl had his back to them, crossbow raised towards several aiming their weapons right back at them.

"Shut. Up."

Daryl could hear the anger coming to the surface as Gareth tried again to silence his man. This stand off couldn't last much longer and Daryl's finger itched on the trigger.

"Gareth please." Alex interrupted.

"It's ok. It's ok." He said, suddenly calm, almost soothing. "Rick, what do you want?"

"Where are our people?" Rick snarled.

"You didn't answer the question."

With Gareth's final word the bullets went flying and the four of them went running.

Terminus was a maze of buildings and fences with armed men positioned on top of all the roofs. Bullets rained around them, hitting the ground close to their feet and sending up clouds of dust and cement shards. At first Daryl thought the snipers were the worst shots he'd ever seen, or that maybe the four of them were extremely lucky, but it didn't take long for them to realize they were being herded.

They ducked into buildings, trying to find shelter from the bullets, looking for a way out of the sprawling complex. They ran through huge warehouses filled with almost nothing. Doors were slammed shut around them, each time leaving them with only one option to exit. They tore across a burned out, bullet riddled courtyard, weaving in and out of junked up cars. It looked like a warzone. Daryl was in front of the group, Carl, Michonne and Rick following, but he wasn't leading them. The bullets were. They ran past a chain link fence and Daryl glanced through it only long enough to see discarded carcasses, of what exactly, he didn't know. Maybe he didn't want to. Just past the fence there were cargo containers, stacked one on the other and he could hear screams echoing from them.

"Let me out!"

"Help!"

Daryl knew where they had come in, he knew where they'd have to go to get to the fences. If they could just make it over, they might have a chance. They ducked inside again, this time into a dark room filled with candles. There were makeshift shrines and names all over the floor and on the walls, in white paint, "NEVER AGAIN. NEVER TRUST. WE FIRST ALWAYS."

"What the hell is this place?" He asked, not knowing, not wanting to know, not thinking he'd get an answer.

"These people," Michonne started, breathing heavily. "I don't think they're trying to kill us."

"No, they're aiming at our feet." Rick finished.

A door slammed, once again leaving them only one exit. They ran for it, like an animals through a snare.

They burst back into the sunlight, their eyes quickly adjusting from the dark room they just came from. The gunfire started up again and Daryl saw the fence just in the distance. They ran towards it, but came to a halting stop when they realized the fence was lined with more armed people. How many fucking soldiers did this asshole have?

The four of them stood there, unsure what to do or where to go next. If this was the end, Daryl was ready to go down fighting.

The yard fell silent. The gunfire had stopped. All Daryl could hear was his own breath heaving in and out of his lungs.

"DROP YOUR WEAPONS. NOW."

Daryl glared up at the roof where Gareth stood. They all did. No one moved.

"NOW!"

Daryl angrily threw the spike he'd picked up to the ground. His crossbow clattered uselessly onto the cement and he unsnapped his knife from its sheath. Rick, Carl and Michonne's weapons fell uselessly to the cement in front of them.

Gareth began shouting down orders.

"RINGLEADER. Go to your left. The train car. GO!"

Rick stared back at Gareth, but didn't move.

"You do what we say and the boy goes with you. Anything else, he dies and you end up in there anyway."

Daryl watched as Rick nodded at his son and then turned to head towards the train car.

"NOW THE ARCHER."

Daryl guessed that meant him, although the description didn't quite fit. He hated the idea of getting in that train car, trapped like an animal. He would have refused, would rather be shot, but he wasn't going to have Carl's blood on his hands. He glared up at Gareth before following Rick to their cage.

"NOW THE SAMURAI."

Rick had reached the rough set of wooden steps that led up to the car, Daryl only feet behind him. Littered around were torn and flatten boxes of powdered milk and paper bowls. Michonne took her place behind Daryl and that left Carl standing alone in the courtyard. He looked small and vulnerable and Daryl felt completely powerless.

"STAND AT THE DOOR. RINGLEADER, ARCHER, SAMURAI. IN THAT ORDER."

"My son." Rick shouted and Daryl hated the desperation that had crept into his voice.

"Go kid." With Gareth's go ahead Carl moved towards them. To Daryl it seemed he was going incredibly slow and he could barely breathe it seemed so likely that they'd hear a bullet ring out and Carl would be gone. The three of them, the adults that were supposed to be protecting Carl, all stood silently willing him to make it across that cement divide.

"RINGLEADER, OPEN THE DOOR AND GO IN."

"I'll go in with him." Rick demanded, gesturing towards Carl.

"DON'T MAKE US KILL HIM NOW."

With no other choice, completely at the mercy of these people, Rick turned and opened the door.

The train car was dark and it smelled like piss. It took their eyes a while to adjust to the dark, but Daryl knew they weren't alone before they even heard Glenn's voice.

"Rick?"

He emerged from the shadows, filthy and dejected. Maggie appeared at his side. Daryl moved forward, wanting both to find Kate with them and fearing that he would. The faces of the others came into focus as their eyes became accustomed to the blackness. Sasha and Bob were there, and other people too, strangers he'd never seen, but Kate wasn't among them.

KATE -

The cramps, much worse than before, woke Kate up in the dead of the night. The room was pitch black and she groped around the nightstand for her flashlight, finally finding it and clicking it on. She threw back the blankets and stared at the bloody sheets.

She'd tried to prepare herself for this, she knew it was coming, but it still felt like she'd been punched in the throat. Hot tears stung her eyes and slipped down her face. Her crying started silently, until her breath caught and a loud sob erupted from her chest. She clasped both hands over her mouth in an effort to keep quiet, the last thing she wanted right now was company.

The pain was like menstrual cramps, except much worse. A dull, throbbing ache low in her abdomen that came in waves. She sat heartbroken in the stained bed and wondered what she should do. She wished she could take a hot shower, let all the blood that stained her legs run down the drain. She wished she could tear off the sheets and throw them in a washer machine, remove all signs that this horrible thing had happened. But instead she got up quietly, a fresh gush of blood running down her legs, and made her way to the dresser in the room. She dug through the drawers until she found pajama pants and a pair of men's underwear. She put them under her arm and walked unsteadily down the hallway to the bathroom. There was a cupboard filled with linens and toiletries and she found a hand towel that she used to catch the blood and some Advil to dull the pain. She moved quietly back down the hall, a hand against the wall to steady herself as she returned to the bedroom. She tore the sheets off the bed, balling them up and throwing them into the corner on the floor. She pulled the comforter up over the bare mattress and grabbing an afghan off the chair, covered herself up and turned off the flashlight.

She laid in the dark, unable to sleep, riding out the waves of pain and hating herself for ever, even for a second, resenting the pregnancy.

\- DARYL -

Fear, unbridled and primitive, was the only thing Daryl could feel.

He wasn't aware of the barking screams escaping from his gagged mouth. He couldn't feel the hands of his captors digging into his arms, bruising his flesh. His body bucked in attempts to escape, to not give up without a fight, but it was all in vain. The men who had him pushed him roughly to his knees over a stainless steel trough and he tried his best to wrest away from their hold as they zip tied his wrists and ankles. He wasn't alone. Rick, Bob and Glenn had also been pulled coughing and gasping for breath from the train car. They'd planned to fight, but they didn't anticipate the smoke grenade that dropped from the roof into the small space they were laying in wait. As the white smoke filled the train car their hopes for escape disappeared. Daryl had gasped for air and his lungs found nothing but the thick, burning smoke. He'd pried his stinging eyes open at the sound of the container door slamming open and all he could see was a silhouette of a man, standing over them in a gas mask. Even then he wasn't afraid, only angry. He'd wait for an opportunity, an opportunity to overpower these men, but any coherent thought dissolved as they were dragged into the warehouse and the whirring sound of a saw met his ears.

Although they'd been gagged, the men of Terminus hadn't been kind enough to blindfold them and the sights that met Daryl's eyes were terrifying. Men cutting through human bodies. Flesh and bone giving way to the spinning blade.

Like an animal trapped, Daryl fought uselessly against the zip ties that bound his ankles and wrists together and his movements became more frantic as a man, wearing a plastic apron slick with blood, dragged a large blade over butcher's steel. The other man, tall and bald, stood just behind Daryl's shoulder taking practice swings with a metal bat so close to Daryl's head he could feel the wind come off of it.

They weren't the only ones kneeling at the trough, but Daryl hardly noticed the four others to their left until the two men made their way to the end of the line. Without ceremony or hesitation, the bald man reached back and sent the bat crashing into the skull of the first in line with a sickening clunk. The victim, slumped over the trough before the knife was pulled across his throat and his blood went spurting out of him like a fountain, splattering loudly against the metal basin. The noises coming out of the other men were inhuman, the desperate screams of prey trapped. Daryl summoned all the strength he had to try to break free, to at least be standing when the end came. The second swing resulted in the same stomach turning sound and the blood of both men, thick and dark mixed together and made its way down the trough towards the drain.

The butchers were making quick work out of them and Daryl knew they only had minutes left before they'd all be hanging lifelessly over the stainless steel lip.

They'd finished off the third man when Gareth appeared at the door, unconcerned with the carnage before him and making notes in a journal.

"Hey guys?" Gareth asked. "What were your shot counts?"

The answer came quickly, "38" and then the bat made contact with the fourth man's skull. Glenn was next and Daryl could hear his breathing, ragged and noisy. Just as the bat was poised to end Glenn, Gareth spoke up again.

"Hey?"

His men stopped.

"Your shot count?"

"Crap man, I'm sorry." The knife wielder began, more concerned over his slip up than the fact that he was slitting men's throats. "It was my first round up."

"After you're done here," Gareth said, clearly annoyed at the inconvenience. "Go back to your point and count the shells. Kaylee won't be gathering them until tomorrow."

"Hey! Hey!" Bob's voice, muffled and desperate called out to Gareth from the other side of Rick. "Let me talk to you."

Gareth ignored him and began to count.

"Four from A." He said, calmly as he pointed to them, before gesturing to the bodies bleeding out in the trough. "Four from D."

He made more notes in his book.

Bob began again. "Hey! Let me talk to you for a minute."

Gareth looked up from his work and rolled his eyes.

"What?!" He asked, annoyed, as he pulled Bob's gag down.

"Don't do this. We can fix this."

Gareth went for the gag, "No. You can't."

"You don't have to do this!" Bob tried again, his breathing fast and shallow. "We told you there's a way out of all this! You just have to take a chance. We have a man who knows how to stop it. He has a cure. We just have to get him to Washington."

Daryl thought of the pudgy, mulleted man he'd met back in the storage container and how he claimed to have a cure. Daryl wasn't sure he believed him and he doubted Gareth would. Sure enough, Gareth eyed Bob with disbelief. He leaned back in and replaced his gag.

"You can't go back Bob."

"We can! You don't have to do this!"

Gareth shut his book and crouched down in front of Rick, lowering his gag.

"We saw you go into the woods with a bag and come out without it. Had to pull my spotters back before we could go look for it. What was in it?"

Rick and Daryl both stared him down with intense hatred.

"You hid it, right? In case things went bad. Smart." He paused and looked away. "Still, we'll find it. But it's too dangerous to go out there right now."

Gareth pulled a dagger out casually as he spoke and suddenly lunged for Bob, dragging him down by his neck and placing the point of the blade inches from his eye.

"What was in it? I'm curious and it was a big bag." He said, as if he were about to peel an apple and not gouge a man's eye out.

Rick didn't reply, just stared at the madman.

"You really going to let me do this?" Gareth said as he gestured to Bob.

"Well let me take you out there. I'll show you." Rick said, matching the casual manner of conversation Gareth had.

Gareth smiled and shook his head. "Not going to happen." He pulled Bob closer to the blade. "But this might."

"There's guns in it." Rick started, pausing. "AK-47, .44 Magnum, automatic weapons. Night scope. There's a compound bow and...a machete with a red handle. That's what I'm gonna use to kill you."

Gareth smiled, his lips spreading flat across his straight and even teeth, and let out a short laugh and suddenly the game was over. He put his knife back in its sheath, the gag back in Rick's mouth and patted him on the shoulders. "Thanks."

Turning to his men it was all business once again and terror jolted through Daryl's body as he realized his life was about to end. His only comfort was that Kate wasn't here. He thought of Glenn and Rick, how they knew that Maggie and Carl would meet this same end and he couldn't imagine how much worse this made it for them.

"You have two hours to get them on the dryers, then we go back to public face." Gareth instructed. "Now's the time we can get messy, but we need to dial it all down by sundown. Got it?"

"Yes, sir."

The crack of gunfire, two shots, sounded outside in the distance. Gareth, his calm and controlled demeanor faltering suddenly, reached for his radio.

"Hey Chuck?"

The man with the bat was mid-swing, seconds away from smashing Glenn's skull, when another shot rang out.

They stopped and every living body in the room waited expectantly until a great explosion shook the entire building.

The explosion threw them all onto the ground. Everyone but Glenn, who was buckled over the trough groaning in pain. Daryl watched from his back as the butchers picked themselves up and Gareth yelled into his radio, "Hey, what the hell was that? Do you copy?"

There was no answer and Gareth ordered his two men to stay put.

"Gareth," The bald man started. "These guys aren't going anywhere."

Daryl hoped Gareth would let them follow him out and they could work on escaping, but it wasn't to be.

"STAY HERE UNTIL I KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING." Gareth screamed, finally reacting to something with real emotion.

The two men started arguing immediately. For so boldly slitting the throats of men, the man with the knife was a coward.

"So we just sit here?" He asked, anxiety evident in his voice.

"Got a job to do." The bald man replied.

That didn't satisfy the coward, he walked back and forth nervously, trying to reach Gareth on the radio.

"He's busy." His partner said, annoyed.

"You smell the smoke? You hear the shots? He could be dead. What the hell are we doing here? The whole place could be going up!"

Daryl heard a scraping sound and looked to where Rick laid on the ground on his side next to him. Suddenly Rick's arms were free and he worked on the zip tie binding his legs before pulling himself into a crouching position and nodding at Daryl.

The two men were still arguing, unaware that one of their captors was free and Daryl watched as Rick stayed hidden behind the trough waiting for his opportunity.

Suddenly he pounced and although Daryl couldn't see, he could hear Rick attack. The sound of crunching bone and a body hitting the ground with a thud, while the other man only managed to stutter 'no' over and over until they turned into painful groans as Rick stabbed him to death.

KATE -

Morning dawned through the dusty blue shades of the bedroom window. Kate hadn't slept at all, instead she rocked and writhed through the awful pain and the resulting evidence that she had in fact lost the baby. To describe what her body was going through as cramps didn't quite capture just how excruciating it was, but they were of the same nature. She'd eventually given in and made her way to the living room where Hershel was asleep on the couch. She said his name softly, only once, and his eyes flew open. None of them slept deeply anymore. She hadn't been sure there was anything he could actually do for her, but fear required that she not go through it all alone. He sat stoically at her bedside for sometime, checking her for fever, asking her questions to determine just how much blood she was losing and sitting silently when the agony would reach a height so dizzying, nothing but groans were possible.

The worst of it lasted nearly three hours and when the pain finally retreated to a manageable level, she told Hershel she thought she could manage to sleep and watched as he limped out the bedroom. She could hear Judith wake in the room across the hallway and Beth chirped a sweet good morning to the little girl. Judith gurgled a happy response and the realization that her baby was gone hit Kate full force. She laid on her back in a stranger's bed and stared up at the white popcorn ceiling. Hot tears ran down her temples and curled around her ears. She'd spent days holding on to the hope that she and Daryl would find each other, but this morning she admitted to herself that she'd been a fool to believe it and now their baby, the last bit of Daryl she had, was gone too. How was she supposed to carry on now that everything was gone?

Her dark thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door and then the voices of Josh and Allison joined Hershel's familiar one. Kate didn't make much of an effort to sort out their conversation, she was sure they'd come by to check on her. It was kind of them, but she hardly could muster any feelings about it. They were relieved, she was sure, that they wouldn't have to go off on another wild goose chase for a husband that was likely never to be found. They could return to their home and get on with their life together.

Sure enough, she heard the sound of the front door opening and closing again. She imagined them walking down the drive, Willie at their side, shaking their heads sadly and feeling thankful that they still had each other. She was so sure of her narrative that the sound of Allison's voice making its way down the hallway came as a shock.

"She was going to try and get some sleep." Hershel explained. "I don't think she got any at all last night."

"This room?" Allison asked and then Kate heard the sharp sound of knuckles on the bedroom door. She didn't respond, but Allison didn't wait for her to and suddenly the woman was standing over her. Her strawberry blonde hair twisted in a knot on top of her head and her face, normally so inscrutable, filled with compassion.

"Hershel told me about the baby." She said in a soft voice. "I'm so sorry Kate."

Kate's face twisted with grief and she only managed to shake her head in response. She wanted to say more, pretend that she was strong. She wanted to ask what Allison was doing here. The two women had never warmed to each other and Kate was bewildered at her presence now when Allison could easily be rid of her.

"Josh just left. He's going to keep looking for Daryl."

A watery smile, as unexpected as this news, curled Kate's mouth and a wisp of hope stirred inside her.

"He..he is?" Kate struggled to get the words out, unbelieving that these strangers would be so kind and feeling so undeserving of it.

Allison shook her head.

"Why aren't you with him?"

"Josh will be fine on his own. He goes on runs a lot with just Willie." Allison said. "Besides, I thought I could be more useful here. With you."

"With me?" Kate struggled to understand. There wasn't much left to help her with and she had Hershel here. "How?"

"Kate, I've gone through this, losing a baby, before. Six times actually, before the world ended."

Kate looked up at Allison's face and so much about their time together suddenly made sense. She tried to think of how to respond, what to say after learning of so much heartbreak.

"Allison…I don't...I don't know what to say. I'm sorry."

Allison shrugged and sat herself down in the chair Hershel had pulled to the side of the bed in middle of the night.

"I'm sorry too. And I'm sorry that I wasn't kinder to you when we met."

Kate shook her head, embarrassed that Allison felt like she had to apologize at all.

"Allison, you don't have to…"

"I just, the thing is, no matter how many times I'd told myself it was better this way, better to not have a baby in this awful world, I still wish I hadn't lost them. You showed up and it was just…" She looked across the room and shook her head before looking at Kate and shrugging. "...hard. It was just hard."

She stopped for a second and stared into space, a rueful chuckle erupting from her pretty mouth, before turning her attention back to Kate.

"Are you still having cramps?"

"Yes. But nothing like last night. I keep wondering what happened, if I did something wrong. I tried not to push myself too hard the past several days. Thanks to you and Josh, we've had food and water. It just doesn't make any sense. Why now?"

"It doesn't happen right away. The bleeding. Not in my experience anyway. Your body doesn't realize, not until your hormones start going down, that you aren't pregnant. You could've lost the baby weeks ago."

Kate thought of the flu. The fever, the horrible coughing and dehydration, how she'd lost consciousness and how close she'd come to dying and she knew, she knew without a doubt that it was then that she'd lost her baby.

\- DARYL -

The group made their way through the woods. They were joined now by the newcomers: Tara, who Glenn said he found near the prison where he awoke alone after the attack, and a group of three led by Abraham the big red head, his woman, Rosita and the mulleted-man, Eugene, who claimed he had a cure. They'd all been on the road, helping Glenn to find Maggie, following her signs to Terminus just as Daryl had.

Abraham and Rosita had taken it upon themselves to be Eugene's protector. The chubby man, who looked more like an overgrown Boy Scout than a human-kind saving scientist, was apparently incapable of staying alive on his own. Abraham and Rosita had been escorting him from Texas to DC, where he could share the supposed cure, when they came across Tara and a passed out Glenn on the side of the road.

Now they were all together, at least temporarily, and wandering through the woods once again looking for food, shelter and of course keeping their eyes open for any sign of the missing.

After Rick killed those men, they had fought their way out, armed with butchering tools they'd gathered in a room filled with humans body parts, skinned and hung to dry. The courtyard was crawling with walkers, some covered in flames and the people of Terminus screaming as they died painfully on the ground where they'd killed so many themselves. There were still those fighting and gunshots rang out as they had made their way back to the train car where the rest of their group waited. Rick flung the door open and they all escaped, fighting against the hoards of walkers that emerged endlessly from the smoking yard. They ran for the fence and one by one, Abraham had helped them over as Rick returned fire from Gareth's group with a gun he took from a man he killed.

They'd returned to the spot they'd buried the weapons and the remainder of their supplies. Rick had begun shouting out plans to finish the job, to kill Gareth and any of his remaining people. He was met with protests. They were exhausted and traumatized and they tried to convince Rick there was no point. That they needed to move on, to get as far away as possible from this place. The newcomers were particularly against the idea, or at least more forceful in their response to Rick, a man they didn't know. Out of everything they'd been through since the start of this whole thing, Daryl found Terminus the most disturbing. He knew Rick would look to him for support, to back him up in his determination to kill the people who committed such atrocities. Of course the new people didn't see what they saw, but Bob and Glenn did and they were among those urging Rick to move on. Daryl hated these people, he did, but he wanted to go. He had nothing else, at that moment, to give. But he knew if Rick wanted him to, he would stay and he would help fight. He was about to give in, he may have even nodded, but something caught the corner of his eye.

Out of the woods, Carol emerged. The last time he saw her they had been in the courtyard of the prison and Daryl was begging her to help Kate. To keep an eye on her while he went to find medicine for her and the others who had the flu. He was too wrapped up in his own desperate worry to find out what was troubling her, although he knew there was something wrong. After the fall of the prison, on the many nights he'd spent alone in the woods, he'd revisited that moment and wondered if he should've done things differently, if he could've done something that would have prevented Rick from exiling her. He was sure he'd never see her again, but here she was, standing there like comfort embodied and he ran to her, like a child seeking comfort from his mother. The relief and joy that he felt as he wrapped his arms around her came as a surprise, he thought he may never feel either again. But it was short lived, as he pulled away and looked at her face everything else came crashing down on him: the heartbreak of losing Kate, the exhaustion from searching for her and the physical toll the beating from Joe's men was still taking on him. He hadn't had time to begin dealing with the unspeakable things he'd witnessed at Terminus and the narrow escape from a grisly death had left him traumatized. Completely deflated his head dropped to her shoulder and he cried.

It had been Carol who saved them. She'd admitted as much to a shocked Rick. Daryl watched their awkward exchange, comprised of gratitude and shame. It was only the three of them that knew that Carol had left the prison before the Governor attacked and none of them let on otherwise to the group who all greeted her warmly.

Rick was overruled. They decided not to fight and immediately headed north, but there was no real destination in mind. Just the need for shelter, a place they could recuperate. Carol and Daryl brought up the rear, talking in hushed tones.

"I can't find Kate." Daryl said, guilt in his eyes. He noticed Mika and Lizzie weren't with Carol and he guessed they were dead. He didn't want her assuming the same about Kate, not when he wasn't sure.

"When I didn't see her here…" Carol said, shaking her head. "I just assumed."

"We were seperated when the Governor attacked the prison."

"I thought it might be him." She said. "I saw the smoke, saw the downed fences and the walkers. You know I wasn't at the prison when it happened."

"I know." He said, his voice troubled. "Rick told me that mornin'. I didn't know what to do, I was tryin' to figure it out when the attack happened. I can't believe Rick did that. I'm sorry."

"Don't be angry at Rick. He was trying to protect the group."

"I know. But so were you." Carol nodded and they walked a few more paces in silence.

"Tyreese is dead." Daryl started again. "Governor captured him and Michonne, rode up to our gates. Rick tried to negotiate, but he killed Tyreese and all hell broke loose."

"Poor Sasha." She said with a sad sigh. "What about the bus? That was the plan, maybe Kate got on it?"

"She did. I saw her get on it. She was with Beth and Judith. I watched it drive away and followed it when there was no one left to kill. I found it in the middle of the road. Everyone inside had turned and had been put down, but I checked the bodies. She wasn't there. Neither was Beth or Judith. Hershel's missin' too. I got out alone, I searched for days with no sign of her or anyone else. I saw the signs for Terminus and hoped she'd gone there. On my way I ran into Rick, Carl and Michonne. We didn't know everyone else had been captured until we were thrown into a train car with them."

"I was following the signs too. To Terminus."

"We should be dead. Another minute and we would have been. How'd you do it? How'd you know?"

"I was close. I was walking along the rails and up ahead was an old, abandoned shack. There was a car parked there and I could hear this man talking on a walkie. When he mentioned a chick with a sword and a kid with a hat I figured I knew who he meant, I mean, how many sword-wielding women are wandering around these parts. He tried to feed me some bullshit line about sanctuary, but he wasn't talking about sanctuary when I was listening in. So I shot him, took his weapons and his fireworks."

"Fireworks?"

"Ya. He said he had to set them off to distract the walkers that were approaching. He was right about the walkers. When I got there, a whole herd was nearing the fence line and all the people inside went screaming."

"I don't know how people willin' to slaughter and eat other humans are so cowardly when it comes to fightin' off the dead." Daryl said, still in disbelief about what he saw in that terrible place.

"I saw you four too, I saw them drag you into a building. That's when I knew it wasn't just Michonne and Carl. "

"And the explosion?"

"Propane tank. I shot it and then launched a firework into it."

Daryl shook his head. "You sure ain't that timid woman I met back at the quarry camp."

Carol's face darkened. "I haven't been that woman for a long time."


	38. Chapter 38

Author's Note: This is the second post of the day (or I guess technically in the last 24 hours since the night has slipped away from me). Since it is kind of odd to post two so quickly, please make sure you have read the previous chapter (37) before reading this one.

Chapter 38

-DARYL-

On the second night they'd spent in the woods since their escape from Terminus, Daryl and Carol sat quietly in a small clearing, keeping watch. They each were lost in their own sorrowful thoughts and content with the silence.

Daryl was frustrated. He knew the more time that passed, the less likely he'd be to find Kate. He'd spent days following the signs, sure Kate would be with Glenn and although he was thankful he'd found Rick and the rest of them, he was terrified he'd lost her forever. He'd spent most of today breaking off from the group, trying to cover as much area as possible and looking for any sign of her, but he still felt he should be doing more. He picked a rock up off the ground and threw it angrily into the trees.

"This is so fucked up!" He growled.

Carol didn't seem alarmed at his outburst but instead said calmly, "I was thinking. If Kate and Beth got out with Hershel, they couldn't get too far. Not with Hershel's leg."

Daryl looked at her, his face still twisted in frustration, but he was listening.

"We are headed back towards the prison area. We can keep looking for signs of them on our way, but I don't think they'll be this far out. Once we find a place to stay it'll be easier. I'll help you, we can go out everyday, even camp if we need to."

Daryl thought about it for a second, feeling indescribably grateful that Carol believed there was still a chance and shook his head appreciatively. "A'right."

Carol fell quiet again and stared into space. Daryl watched her closely, resting his chin on the butt of his crossbow, and listening to the crickets. He thought about their time at the prison and how he and Kate had noticed a difference in Carol long before Karen and David and feeling guilty that he hadn't done something about it then.

"What's botherin' you?"

She continued to look off in the distance while he studied her face.

"I don't want to talk about it. I can't." She said finally. "I just need to forget it."

The silence stretched between them as he searched for something to say.

"A'right" He said finally, surrendering to the fact that he was failing her as he'd failed Kate too.

The next morning, Daryl broke off from the group to hunt. They needed to eat, but that wasn't it. He couldn't shake the feeling that they were being watched and he'd shared his concerns with Rick. They decided that Daryl should circle back to the spot they camped last night and look for tracks. He returned with a string of squirrels, but there hadn't been any signs of people in the area. With no reason to stop, the group continued on as planned until a scream for help echoed out of the woods.

The group froze, unsure what to do and fearful they were walking into another trap. Finally Rick reluctantly waved them on and they went running towards the voice.

On top of a large, gray boulder was a priest, surrounded by hungry walkers. He flailed about, kicking frantically at the snarling creatures as his voice continued to beg for anyone to save him. The group advanced, making quick work of the dead until they were littered around the forest floor. The priest looked cautiously down at them from his spot above. He'd stopped screaming, but Daryl got the impression he was as afraid of them as he had been of the walkers.

"Come on down." Rick said. There wasn't a hint of menace in his voice, but the priest still slid off the rock cautiously, as if he was going to his death.

He stood on his feet and looked around at the bloody walkers his eyes wide with terror and his mouth pulled into a grimace.

"You ok?" Rick asked.

The priest held up a single finger before turning his head and vomiting onto the ground.

Father Gabriel's church was small and quaint, nestled in the shade of several Georgia pines and surrounded by a wood post fence. It was white and narrow, with a small steeple and two large oak doors. He was relieved they had found a place to stay, at least for a few nights. He'd been fighting against his instinct to go off on his own. He felt like he was wasting time picking slowly through the woods, but he saw the wisdom in Carol's suggestion. It would be good to have a home base, somewhere they could check in and replenish supplies if they needed to. Gabriel's church was further from the prison area than he'd hoped, but he and Carol had found a car on the side of the road when they were out collecting water and they could take it as far north as the roads would carry them and start their search in earnest.

The first night in the church was a good one for the group. They felt safe within the walls, and their reluctant host had led them to the local food bank. It had been crawling with walkers, but they were able to return with more food than they'd seen since the fall of the prison. Daryl sat sullenly on the hard wooden floor of the church with his back against an oak pew, shoveling a plateful of cold beans into his mouth and trying to ignore Sasha and Bob as they sat cozily across the aisle from him.

Abraham stood, holding up a glass of communion wine and proposing a toast. He blathered on about how he saw them all as survivors, and Daryl eyed him warily. He didn't dislike the man, but he was still trying to figure out what his story was. He knew Abraham had his own agenda and wanted to get Eugene to Washington, D.C., he'd made more than one plea to get back on the road and he and Rosita had spent the majority of the day getting the old church bus up and running. Daryl had a feeling that Abraham's plans would seriously conflict with his and he could feel his hackles rising as the big man launched into his pitch.

"Is that all you want to be? Survivors? Wake up in the morning, fight the undead pricks, forage for food, go to sleep with two eyes open, rinse and repeat? 'Cause you can do that. I mean, you got the strength. You got the skill. Thing is, for you people, for what you can do, that's just surrender. Now, we get Eugene to Washington and he make the dead die and the living will have this world again. And that is not a bad takeaway for a little road trip. Eugene, what's in D.C.?"

Eugene sat on a pew like a lump and in his typical flat affect he replied, "Infrastructure constructed to withstand pandemics even for this fubar magnitude. That means fuel, food, refuge. Restart."

Daryl looked away in frustration, catching Carol's concerned eye and shaking his head.

"However this plays out," Abraham continued. "However long it takes for the reset button to kick in, you can be safe there. Safer than you've been since this whole thing started. Come with us. Save the world. Save it for yourselves. Save it for the people out there who don't got nothing left to do except survive."

"I ain't goin' anywhere without my wife." Daryl growled, getting to his feet and pacing up and down the center aisle. "Man, we're still missin' people. Maggie's father and sister. Rick's daughter. We ain't goin' nowhere until we find them."

"So Daryl's out then." Abraham said, dismissing him quickly and looking around the room hopefully. "Who's gonna get on that bus with us in the morning and ride off to a better tomorrow?"

Like music to Daryl's ears, Maggie added her gentle voice to the debate. "I'm out too. My dad, my sister...Kate might as well be a sister to me. I'm not leaving, not now."

Glenn, at Maggie's side, shook his head in agreement. Abraham looked at Rick, hope and frustration mixed up into one intense look.

Rick looked at Daryl and nodded.

"Daryl's right. We're not leaving them behind. If you're willing to wait, we'll go with you, but not yet. We don't leave our family behind."

"And what if he can't find them. What if, and no disrespect, there is no one left to find."

"She ain't dead." Daryl said firmly, surprised that his voice didn't betray his own fears. "She ain't."

"If they're out there, Daryl'll find them." Rick said confidently. "And then, if you haven't headed out already, we'll go. All of us."

Abraham looked across the room at Daryl and the group held their breath as the two men stared off, waiting to see if the conflict would escalate. Instead, Abraham, his jaw set in frustration, offered up his glass in surrender and found his place next to Rosita in the pews.

Daryl shoved a pack full of water and food into the running car and slammed the trunk down. The exchange with Abraham had worked him up and the uneasiness carried over into his movements, making them quick, but inefficient. Carol stood at the passenger door and watched him walk over to the driver's side and pull up on the handle. It was still locked and he cursed in frustration before reaching his arm into the open window and pulled up the switch.

"You sure you don't want to wait for morning?" Carol asked.

"Naw. No point. Already wasted too much time." He said, falling heavily into the driver's seat and slamming the door shut. Carol nodded and got in.

The road was dark and empty and their headlights lit up the trees at every curve. Occasionally a walker or two would amble into the road and Daryl would swerve around it, but other than that they didn't see a single creature. They drove mostly in silence, both lost in their own troubles and comfortable enough with one another that they didn't feel the need to fill the void. Daryl chewed the inside of his mouth and stared down the road as if it were something to conquer. It had taken him days to make his way from the burning prison to Terminus, but only 6 hours by car. In the old days it would've been even less, but some of the roads were impossible to continue on, abandoned vehicles laying out bumper-to-bumper with the treeline so close to the asphalt it kept them from doing anything but figuring a way to turn around to find a new route. As they drew nearer to the prison, his months of going on runs started to pay off and he knew which highways were clear and which backroads would lead them in the right direction.

He'd been eyeing the gas tank for some time, wondering which would come first: an abandoned vehicle they could syphon from or an empty tank. When the car began to lurch, Daryl figured he had his answer and steered it towards the side of the road, behind a huge wooden sign advertising a firework warehouse. Carol had been sleeping for the last hour and as the car's tires went from blacktop to dirt she woke.

"Outta gas." Daryl explained, putting the car in park and turning the key.

"Where are we?" She said through a yawn.

"Not too far from the prison, 15 miles or so. We got a couple hours before dawn."

"You look tired. We shouldn't be out on foot in the dark. Why don't you try and get some sleep, I'll keep watch."

Daryl complied, leaning the driver's seat back, and demanding she not let him sleep past first light, he threw his arm over his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

The sound of something falling against the hood woke him up and he watched through the windshield as Carol sent her knife through the skull of a walker.

"Hell of a way to start the day." He said as he climbed out of the car, rubbing his face and eyeing the dead at Carol's feet.

"How'd you sleep."

He grunted a reply, as he reached in and popped the trunk. They gathered their supplies and headed off into the gray, misty morning.

The day was long and they covered a lot of ground, but they had nothing to show for their search except a dozen downed walkers and a couple skinny squirrels. They'd combed through neighborhoods and crisscrossed through the tall trees, picking through abandoned camps and houses that had long ago been ransacked for supplies. Like his first few days after the prison fall, Daryl grew more frustrated and hopeless as the day trickled away. He was overwhelmed by the number of neighborhoods they'd have to search through and wondered what Kate and the others could possibly be living on when food in the area was so scarce.

It was nearing sunset when they spotted a figure 50 yards out, a walker's uneven gait. They continued on their path, undeterred by a solitary threat. As they drew nearer, Daryl raised his crossbow and aimed to take it down. His finger was on the trigger and he was about to squeeze it, when the remaining light of the day filtered through the trees and glinted off the blonde hair of the walker. Daryl's gut clenched and the air left his lungs. His bow fell uselessly to the ground. Carol stared at him, bewildered and could only call after him as he took off running across the forest floor.

The walker had its back to him and was moving slowly in the opposite direction. Its clothes were caked in mud and blood, but he thought he could still make out the familiar flower pattern that dotted the blue shirt. He was aware of Carol calling his name, the confusion in her voice giving way to a sorrowful plea. He was almost on the walker when it turned to investigate Carol's calls, its face twisted into a snarl. It spotted Daryl and with outstretched arms and snapping teeth lurched towards him. Even though decay had disfigured the thing's face, he could tell it wasn't Kate. He pulled his knife and buried it deeply into its rotting skull, it fell to the ground with a thud and he sank to his knees beside it.

"Daryl?" Carol came up behind him, her single word full of question.

"It ain't her." He said, his head hanging down low and his voice thick with tears. "I thought...the shirt, the hair. It ain't her."

Carol turned away from him, keeping watch on the woods and giving him some room to collect himself. Finally he rose from the ground, wiping his eyes with the back of his forearm. Carol handed him his crossbow, collected from the spot he'd dropped it and watched him carefully.

"Daryl, why don't we call it a day. It'll be dark soon, we should make camp."

They sat around a tiny fire and roasted the two squirrels. They'd set up a warning perimeter pieced together from rope and a wind chime they'd found in a backyard. Daryl pulled his squirrel from the flames and began to pick at the meat.

"Thanks for comin' out here with me." He said, his mouth full and his eyes not meeting her's. "You didn't have to. You could've stayed with the group, roof over your head and food to eat."

"I don't mind. Not sure I'm ready to be around everyone again, not yet. Besides, Kate made me promise I'd look after you."

Daryl snorted. The idea of being looked after was absurd to him, but it didn't surprise him that Kate would try.

"When you had me looking in on her when you were off fetching medicine for the flu. She was worried about you."

"Kate and her promises." He shook his head, remembering that first promise he made to her when they'd started living at the prison. "Remember that day we had to go rescue Maggie and Glenn at Woodbury?"

"Hard to forget, it was the same day you found me in the tombs. Same day Michonne showed up at the prison."

"Ya. What a fuckin' day." He stared into the flames and remembered. "Kate and me, we weren't nothin' then. But right before we left she comes runnin' up to me, all out of breath and worked up. She starts tellin' me I gotta _promise_ her somethin', that I gotta promise her that I'll come back. I had just spent the last couple of months tellin' myself I was an idiot for letting a prissy girl like that get under my skin, that that was the last sort of woman that would want a man like me, but there she was lookin' scared to death because I was headin' out. And even though I knew I shouldn't, I promised her, even though I knew I might die, I promised her I'd come back."

He stopped then, thinking about how she'd kissed him. How that kiss had given him more hope than anything in his whole life and how close he'd come to blowing it all.

"I always wondered how it began between the two of you." Carol said, a wistfulness in her voice that Daryl didn't miss.

"I'd had nothing for my very own my whole life, nothing good. And then I had her. I should've known it was too good to be true."

"Stop that." Carol said. " You'll find her Daryl, you will."

Daryl eyed her doubtfully, before dropping his stick to the ground and standing to kick dirt onto the fire.

"Get some sleep Carol, I'll take first watch."

The prison loomed in the distance, a crumbling and broken structure. There were still walkers wandering the grounds and the tank sat in the courtyard, a giant reminder of their enemy.

Daryl and Carol stood in the woods a safe distance away and looked at the place they'd once called home.

"Governor had that tank, don't think he could've gotten to us without it."

Carol's mouth was pursed into a tight line. It was hard for Daryl to come back, to see the ruins, but it was the first time Carol had been this close since it fell. Since Rick sent her away. Daryl got the impression she was remembering more than just the good memories, but he kept silent.

They didn't think Kate would have returned, it would've been too dangerous, but it made sense to come back to the last place they'd all been. Maybe she'd think to do the same.

They moved west, following the path of the bus once again and finding it right where Daryl had left it weeks ago. Carol looked sadly at the rotting corpses of people they had lived with.

"Which way did you go? Before."

Daryl pointed in the direction he'd headed that day, when he thought he could easily catch up to them, "That way. Eventually though, I turned back and followed the stream."

"Ok, let's go in the opposite direction of the stream. Cover that area, do you remember if it's more woods or are there neighborhoods?"

"Woods stretch on for a bit, maybe 8 miles or so, then you start seeing some houses. We sent groups out that way on runs a few times. Mostly cleared out"

"Alright. How are you on water?"

Daryl held up his canteen and shook it. "Could use more."

"Me too. Maybe we head to the stream first."

The fast moving creek twisted through the woods and they could hear it long before they approached its muddy banks. The trees that grew alongside it dipped their branches down low until they skimmed the surface of the clear water and large rocks studded the shore. Daryl knelt down and filled his canteen. He watched a hellbender scurry out from under a rock and make its way down the bottom of the creek. He pulled the crossbow off his back and aimed it at the slimy creature.

"I won't eat it." Carol warned, drinking deeply from her water bottle and looking at Daryl with her eyebrows raised in disgust. "I won't."

"Why not?"

She rolled her eyes and sighed, leaning against a boulder inches from the water. A twig snapped somewhere behind them and they wheeled around frantically to find a man making his way out of the trees, a white dog by his side.

"That's far enough." Daryl commanded from behind his crossbow, aimed to kill.

The man raised his hands in submission and followed Daryl's orders. He was tall, but not particularly threatening, and although he looked uncomfortable with having weapons pointed at him, there didn't seem to be any fight in him. His pants were stained with dirt, but he looked like a man who had a regular place to stay.

"Daryl?" The man questioned, testing the name out like it was a foreign word.

"DO I KNOW YOU?" Daryl snarled back.

"Um, no, but I know Kate."

At the sound of her name on another man's lips, Daryl stormed across the few feet that separated them and grabbed the man's jacket in his fist. The man flinched, but made no move to run. The dog growled at his side, but the man hushed him.

"WHERE IS SHE!?" And without giving the man a second to respond he shouted again, grabbing the man tighter and pulling him towards him. "GODDAMMIT! TELL ME WHERE SHE IS."

"She's...she's safe. I'm a friend. She's in a house. I'll take you there."

Daryl's body was heaving with each breath and the adrenaline bubbled out of him angrily.

"How do I know you aren't full of shit?"

"She's with others from your group...and my wife." The man was shaking ever so slightly, but he didn't break eye contact with Daryl. "We've been looking for you."

"Daryl?" Carol said, the only calm voice among them. "Daryl. Let's hear him out."

Daryl's eyes bored holes in the man's skull, but he begrudgingly pushed him away.

"Others from our group?" Carol started the interrogation. "Who else?"

"Hershel, his daughter and the baby." The man said, taking a deep breath and adjusting his clothing.

"How'd you find them?"

"Kate was out looking for him." He said, looking briefly at Daryl before turning his attention back to Carol. "Came onto my property. She was looking for food and water too. We helped her."

Carol caught Daryl's eye and motioned for him to join her. They spoke in low tones, keeping an eye on the man.

"What do you think?" She asked Daryl, squinting. "He seems like he's telling the truth."

"Somethin' ain't right. He said he found her out searchin' for me. Why ain't she here now? Why's she in some house?"

"Why would he be trying to trick us? What could he possibly gain from leading us back to some house?"

"Those people at Terminus sure seemed anxious to keep us around and it wasn't for anythin' good."

"So you think he's a cannibal?" She chided.

"I ain't sayin' that, I just find it weird that some guy walks out of the woods, knows my name and claims to know Kate."

Carol snorted. "She probably just told him to keep an eye out for a grumpy guy in need of a shower and a haircut."

Daryl scowled and looked off towards the man who was squatting down and petting his dog. Uneasy as he was, he knew they would go with him, but that didn't mean he had to let his guard down.

"Why's it just you?" Daryl started. "You said they were back at the house, why'd they let you search for someone you don't know all on your own?"

The man stood and faltered for a second, looking back down at the dog, when he raised his eyes back to Daryl they were apologetic.

"Man, I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but it seems like Kate lost her baby."

Daryl didn't respond, his teeth worked at the inside of his mouth and he fought the emotions that threatened to make him lose control.

"Is she ok?" Carol asked with concern.

"I think so, my wife is with her. She has some experience with that stuff."

Carol stepped forward and shook the man's hand.

"I'm Carol. Can you take us to them?"

The trio trudged through the woods, but Daryl was barely aware of his surroundings. Lost in the prison of his mind with pain, guilt and loss over a baby that just a month ago he didn't think he wanted. Carol continued her line of questioning. The stranger's name was Josh and he seemed perfectly willing to answer every question she had, but Daryl was still suspicious. It was hard for him to believe that there was anyone left that would do something so unselfish for a total stranger.

"So Josh, where are we headed?" Carol asked.

"Maybe 10-15 miles south of here, off of route 9. Guess they headed through the woods when they left the prison and stopped at the first house they found."

"Are they all ok? Was anyone hurt?"

"The other girl, Beth, twisted her ankle pretty bad and her old man has a bad leg, right? He was having a hard time getting around out here. Kate was out searching on her own the day I found her."

The thought of Kate being out here on her own panicked Daryl and it must have shown because Josh quickly explained, "She didn't have much choice, they didn't have any food or water. We joined her after that, she wanted to search for you. My wife and I went with her. "

"Why? What do you care?" Daryl spat, finding this man an easy target for his anger. He was having a hard time understanding Josh's motivations and he found it easier to be defensive than to hope.

"If I got seperated from my wife, I would hope someone would help her. Is it so hard to believe someone would want to?"

"We've seen a lot of unkindess lately." Carol explained, shooting Daryl a look that clearly communicated she wanted him to behave himself.

Daryl scowled and scanned the trees.

"It was your vest." Josh said.

"My vest?"

"That's how I knew it was you. Kate said you'd probably have it on. When you turned and pointed that crossbow at my face I was sure. She told us a lot about all of you. She likes to talk."

"That sounds like Kate." Carol agreed.

Daryl didn't respond, just glared at the man.

"Goddamn, I guess it's true what they say." Josh said under Daryl's withering gaze. "Opposites attract."

Carol tried to hide her smile, but Daryl caught it.

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" He challenged.

"Kate, she's just so different than you, friendly. You're…"

"An asshole?" Carol filled in the word Josh was too cautious to use, a good natured smile on her face.

Josh laughed. "Ya."

"Man, what's your problem?" Daryl demanded, moving aggressively towards the man. Josh's face fell.

"My problem? Look, I know you people have been through hell, but I don't even know you and I'm out here risking my life so you can get back to your wife. Well guess what? I want to get back to my wife too - I left her to find you. So don't be such a dick."

Josh's words were meant to convict, and they hit their mark. This man was his best bet to find Kate and if he wasn't careful, Daryl's self-destructive habits could destroy that chance. He had to make a decision, trust this man and control his anger or go back to searching the woods aimlessly. Daryl nodded his head in understanding and the three of them moved on.

The yellow candlelight flickered and Kate squinted down at the small print,

" _Insert the point of the right needle, from front to back, into the stitch just created and under the left needle."_

There was a tangle of blue yarn in her lap and knitting needles in her hands. It had been four nights since Josh had gone off in search of Daryl, four nights since she'd lost the baby. She wasn't in pain anymore, at least nothing Advil couldn't take care of. She was still bleeding, but Allison told her that could go on for a couple weeks. The emotional effects were a different story and the pain was compounded by the fact that Daryl was gone. She held out hope that Josh would find him and that kept her from completely giving into the misery that threatened to pull her under.

The night was quiet, they all were. This was a blessing and a curse. They'd managed to keep to themselves in this place they'd been holed up in, but Kate knew it wouldn't last forever. They were all anxious for Josh to return.

Allison had remained with them and Kate glanced over at the couch where the woman was curled up, a large knit afghan thrown over her legs, nicer than anything Kate would be able to produce with her loose and sloppy stitches.

Beth sat in the recliner next to Allison, a soundly sleeping Judith on her chest. She and Allison were talking softly, getting to know one another and Kate could hear Beth talking about her mother. Allison's defenses had fallen away the night Kate miscarried and they'd found her to be incredibly kind and likeable. She did her best to keep her anxiety about Josh's long absence to herself, but Kate could tell with each passing night that her unease grew.

Hershel was on the other side of the couch Kate was on, a candle perched on the table at his side and his nose buried in some book he'd found.

"Hershel, looking at you reading by candlelight with that beard and those suspenders, I could seriously believe we were living in the prairie days."

"More like the wild west." He chuckled, patting the gun at his side. He was still joking, but the twinkle in his eye had dulled and she knew he was dealing with is own fears about the prospects of never seeing Maggie and Glenn again.

Kate turned back to the knitting instructions apathetically. She must be bored if it had come to this. Her grandmother had tried to teach her to crochet once and had quickly given up. She wasn't any good at braiding hair either and she swore it was for the same reason.

The silence of the evening was suddenly shattered by a rhythmic series of knocks on the front door. They were all on their feet in an instance, weapons in hand and alarm written all over their faces, all except Allison's. Instead of panic, a smile had spread across her pretty face.

"Josh!" She said, moving towards the door. "That's Josh's knock."

She scrambled up onto the couch they'd been using as a barrier and looked through the peephole as Hershel and Kate stood cautiously behind her, knives at their side.

"It's too dark, I can't see." Allison complained.

"Allison? Sweetheart, it's me." Josh's muffled voice came through the door and Allison let out a cry of joy and leaped off the couch to push it out of the way.

Kate stood frozen next to Hershel, unable to sort through the feelings that were suddenly buzzing through her body. Afraid to hope, she steeled herself for disappointment, reminding herself that Josh deserved a gracious welcome even if he returned alone.

Allison flung the door open and Josh's towering figure filled the entryway, his arms wrapping around his wife as she flung herself into him. He moved into the house quickly, lifting Allison off her feet and dragging her clear from the door.

Directly behind Josh, standing in the shadows of the dark porch, stood Daryl and Carol. Daryl's crossbow was in his hands and he was craning his neck, trying to see into the house.

At the sight of him, Kate's eyes widened and she brought her hands to her face, covering her mouth and smothering a sob of relief.

"You found him!" She started to smile, but her face crumpled instead and she laughed and cried at the same time as Daryl let his crossbow fall to his side and rushed to her, pulling her to him with such force she lost her breath.

He kissed her and then let his head drop, his lips brushing against her collarbone as he repeated his humble apology again and again.

Her fingers wound their way through the long strands of his hair and the smell of dirt and sweat filled her nostrils as she kissed his head. Her hands grasped onto either side of his face and forced him to look up at her. Her cheeks were wet and her eyes shining with tears, but her smile was wide with relief. She shook her head at him, his apologies were unnecessary, although she should've known he'd find a way to blame himself.

He kissed her again and then pulled away just enough to examine her face.

"The baby?" He asked in a quiet voice.

She felt a frown pull involuntarily at the corners of her mouth and she just shook her head. Daryl's lips formed a tight line and he swallowed hard, pulling her to his chest.


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

A narrow beam of morning sun squeezed its way through a bent blind in the bedroom window and hit Daryl square in the eye. With a groan, he turned onto his side, pulling the pillow along with him to block the intrusion, but all intentions of getting back to sleep dissolved as he caught sight of Kate. She was lying on the pillow next to him, wide awake. As his eyes caught her's a content smile turned her mouth slightly.

It felt so good to be back with her that for a second he could hardly breathe.

"Good morning." She said, in barely more than a whisper. She had dark circles under her eyes that stood out in sharp relief to her milky white skin, which seemed even paler than normal and Daryl worried about everything she'd been through.

"Should've boarded the windows." He said, immediately regretting it.

She glanced in their direction with little concern before returning her gaze to him. She reached out and traced the cut that remained above his eye, before running the pad of her thumb against the bruise that ringed the other. Physical reminders of Joe's men and the night he almost lost his life at their hands. It seemed like so much time had passed since they'd been in that clearing, but his injuries were proof that it had only been days ago.

"Did you get these in that place? Terminus?"

When they arrived last night, after everyone had their reunion and the happy news of Maggie and Glenn's safety had been shared with Hershel and Beth, they'd all began to exchange stories of the time they'd spent apart. He'd let Carol do most the talking, noticing she skipped the part about not actually being at the prison when it fell. He didn't give a shit, there was plenty of the story he wasn't ready to share yet. Not in this room with people he didn't know, so if Carol wanted to tell it her way he was happy to let her. But his silence allowed for large holes in the story and he knew Kate would want to know it all.

"Nah." He said, taking a second to determine whether the news of his encounter with Joe's men would upset her, until he realized their death was news he wanted to share. "Came across Joe and his men again."

He watched the news sink in, her eyes widen slightly and then her brows knitted like they always did before she launched into a thousand questions about something. He didn't let her get that far.

"They're all dead. Everyone one of 'em. We ain't gotta worry about 'em anymore." He tried to say it with finality, he didn't want to go into it all, not yet anyway.

She let out a deep breath. "Good." She leaned in and kissed him where a fist had split his lip. "I worried about them a lot when I was looking for you."

He nodded, and swallowed hard, feeling guilty for the millionth time that she had to be out there without him at all.

"Jesus, you really went through it." She said as she pushed his hair away from his face.

"You weren't havin' no picnic yourself. You ok?" He was afraid to ask, but he knew he needed to. Still, it seemed to come off too casually, as if she'd tripped on the rug and he was being polite.

She rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling and suddenly Daryl felt like she was still lost, gone from him.

"I'm sad." She said in a quiet voice. "About the baby. But it was so much worse when I thought I'd lost you too."

Daryl didn't respond. He didn't know if he should, he was afraid anything he said would sound hollow considering he'd been such an asshole when he found out she was pregnant. Truth was he was surprised at how much knowing the baby was gone hurt him, but that wasn't a burden she needed to bear either. Instead he pulled her close, kissing her shoulder and wishing he knew what to say.

"When are we headed out?" She asked, freeing them both from the uncomfortable tension their silence had brought.

"Soon as we find somethin' to head out in." He said. "I know Hershel is real anxious to get back to Maggie and there are new people with the group, at the church, and they're real anxious to get on the road."

She stayed silent, her eyes still fixed to the ceiling. She didn't ask about the new people or what they wanted to be on the road for. He wished she would, he wished she would turn into him and ask dozens of questions he was unsure how to answer.

"We better get going then." She said, pulling herself from the bed and grabbing her jeans off the chair in the corner. He watched her dress, feeling grateful for the privilege and wondering if he'd ever stop thinking of how close he'd been to never seeing her again. She tossed him his clothes and left the room.

Daryl found a mini van, parked under a rusting carport, at a house up the road. There were two car seats inside, which he unbuckled and tossed onto the ground outside and a floor board full of stale goldfish crackers. He looked under the mats and behind the shade visor, hoping he'd be lucky enough to find the keys, but there weren't any. He thought he might head inside the house, see if they'd been left dangling from a key hook somewhere, but the risk wasn't worth his time when he could hotwire it just as easy.

The gas tank was three quarters full and he drove it over to the house, parking it up on the lawn next to the front porch where Josh sat on a metal lawn chair looking out over the yard.

"Mornin'" Daryl said as he got out of the van.

"Mornin'. Nice ride."

Daryl looked back at the boxy vehicle and snorted. He took the four steps to the porch in two and sat next to Josh.

"Mind if I smoke?" He asked.

"Not if you got one to spare."

Daryl pulled the wrinkled pack out of his front pocket and offered one to Josh. He lit a cigarette and handed the lighter over. They sat in silence, blowing smoke out over the railing.

"Thanks man, for everythin'." Daryl started, looking out over the trees and watching a flock of black birds soar through the sky. "Sorry for being such a dick on the way out here."

Josh screwed up his face and shook his head, dismissing the apology with a wave. "Ah, don't worry about it. I'm glad it all worked out, I'm happy you two are back together."

Daryl nodded. There was no way he could describe the way it felt to have Kate back again, and he had no intention of trying, but the thought of it made him incredibly grateful to this man.

"We're headin' out this mornin'." Daryl began again.

"Figured as much. I imagine Hershel wants to get back to his other daughter, but we'll miss havin' people around to talk to. Allison and Kate seem to have really hit it off."

"Come with us." Daryl blurted out, surprising himself in the process. "We got a guy, says he has a cure. I ain't sure if that's true, but we're headed up to DC to find out. It's a good group of people, survivors."

Josh took a long drag off his cigarette.

"I don't doubt the goodness of your people, and I thank you for your offer, but I think we are gonna stay put."

"You sure? You can't survive this world without people."

"Allison and I have managed pretty well. We've kept to ourselves, haven't drawn much attention. It's harder to do that in a group, and it sounds like you've had more than your share of trouble. We have a home, a water source, it ain't too hard to keep two people and a dog fed."

Daryl nodded. "Suit yourself man, just know that you'd be more than welcome. Rick, he's sort of the one in charge, Judith, that's his kid. I know he'd be as thankful as I am that you helped them."

"I appreciate it and you tell Rick that y'all' will always have friends here."

KATE

Kate squeezed Allison tightly and kissed the woman's cheek.

"You take care of yourself Kate."

"I will. Thank you so much. So, so much. I'll never forget you."

"I won't forget you either." Allison said, wiping a tear with her fingertips and sniffing. Josh put a long arm around her shoulders and pulled her to his side.

Daryl stood at the open driver's door, looking completely out of place next to a mini van. Beth was already strapped in the backseat with Judith fussing on her lab and Carol stood watching Hershel climb in slowly, ready to give him assistance if needed.

Kate knew she'd drawn out the goodbyes as long as she could and so she turned away from Allison and slipped into the front passenger seat. Daryl started up the engine and Kate rolled down her window to wave at the new friends that they were already leaving behind. He slowly drove off the lawn, onto the road and away from the small brick house.

"God I wish they would come with us." Kate said, trying to hide her tears by voicing her frustration.

"I wish they would've let us take them back to their house." Beth added. "Seems silly to risk walking all that way."

"Nah, they don't want to draw any attention to their place." Daryl explained. "Someone'll notice a van quicker than two people and a dog pickin' through the woods."

Another day, another goodbye. It seemed it was all they did anymore. Kate tried to comfort herself with the fact that they were actually able to say goodbye, that she was able to thank them for their help and that at least she could imagine them living there, happily ever after, for as long as she wanted to.

She sat quietly, staring out the passenger side window as the route, dotted with mailboxes and paved drives, gave way to thick trees.

"So this man with a cure," Hershel had started. "Has he bothered to explain it to anyone?"

"In very vague terms." Carol explained. "But the two that are with him, Abraham and Rosita, they are convinced that they are on a mission to save the world."

"And Rick sees no problem with following them to DC?" Hershel asked again, his voice heavy with doubt.

"Guess he figures there isn't much left for us here." Carol replied.

Kate wasn't sure she liked the idea of going to DC. There was a weird part of her that wanted to be in the last place her family knew she had been, but she didn't have the energy to raise the question. She let out a long sigh.

"You ok?" Daryl asked quietly, taking his eyes off the road to look at her, his eyes worried and searching. He rested his hand in her lap. It was so comforting to have him there, to touch him, to feel the weight of his arm. An anchor, a reason to keep going.

She gave him a small smile and shook her head. They were back together, that was all that mattered now. She'd go wherever he went.

Beth tried to figure out just how they'd all been separated so thoroughly, remembering the events of the fall of the prison and asking Daryl and Carol exactly what they remembered, but their responses were so unenthusiastic that she abandoned her effort and turned her attention to Judith.

Hershel continued to consider the trek to Washington, musing about colder winters and what unknowns they might face. Hershel trusted Rick, so his doubts came off more like strategizing than refusal, but his hesitancy did little to calm Kate's own misgivings about the decision.

They stopped twice on their way back to the group, once to clear a path on the road, using the opportunity to syphon and fill up their tank from the abandoned cars and once to wait out a herd that ambled slowly across the highway. As they sat parked quietly a quarter mile out in the shade of the pines, watching the gray figures drag themselves slowly and pointlessly across the asphalt, Carol offered to drive. Daryl started to refuse, but Kate was tired and the idea of settling in the very back of the van and falling asleep next to him was too tempting. He agreed easily enough and they all traded seats clumsily, avoiding opening the doors in case the walkers noticed them, until Carol and Hershel sat in front and Beth and Judith were settled happily in the middle.

Daryl sat, his elbow up on the window and his teeth working on his fingernails. Kate leaned into him, thanking God again that he was back with her and falling into a deep sleep as Carol started the engine back up and rolled back onto the highway.

"We're getting close." Carol said to Hershel from behind the steering wheel.

Kate had been awake for a few minutes now, but she'd kept her eyes closed and her face pressed against Daryl's arm. Kate was surprised at just how long they'd gone before she woke up, their journey was already over.

Dawn was breaking as Carol turned onto the road that would lead them to the church. As the tires went from the smooth blacktop of the highway, onto the older, country road, Daryl was jostled awake.

"What's goin' on?" He asked, shooting up quickly in the seat and looking out the window. "We here already?"

St. Sarah's Episcopal Church was small and white and Kate could tell that it had been beautiful before it's windows were boarded up. Carol drove the van between two wooden fence posts and onto the dirt, easing it slowly past the building and giving a curt wave to a large, red-headed man who noticeably relaxed when he recognized Carol behind the wheel. She parked around the back of the building, next to a white vehicle marked, 'church van' in black letters.

Carol slid out of the driver's seat and waited with her hands on her hips as the redheaded man walked towards the van. Kate and Daryl watched Beth slowly step from the back seat onto the dirt ground, Judith in one arm and her other hand planted on the side of the van so she could be as careful as she could with her healing ankle.

Kate wished she and Daryl could stay in the van, alone, together, for a few minutes longer. That she could leave the retelling of their story to Hershel and Beth and that they could slip in later, quietly, but Daryl was already grabbing his crossbow and jumping out into the sunlight. She followed right behind him.

"Well I'll be a monkey's uncle." The man was saying, looking over their small group with a disbelieving grin, and then at Daryl. "You actually found them."

Daryl stared at him defiantly and nodded.

"Told you I would."

Kate caught Abe's eye and he shook his head with a laugh.

"This your wife?" He asked Daryl, shoving a cigar in his mouth and reaching out a beefy hand to shake Kate's. "I'm Abraham." He said around the cigar.

"I'm Kate."

His blue eyes twinkled with amusement and he nodded at Daryl approvingly.

"How'd things go here?" Daryl asked.

Abe's face turned serious.

"You're back just in time, some of us were headed out this morning, now we can all go at once. Could've used you last night, we had some trouble."

"Is everyone ok?" Hershel asked anxiously.

Before Abraham had a chance to answer they heard the sound of feet on the wooden steps of the church and the happy cry of Maggie's voice as she ran across the yard and threw herself into Hershel's arms. Hershel laughed and kissed the side of his daughter's face and she pulled away from him to hug Beth, both sisters smiling and ignoring Judith's uncomfortable whine from between their embrace.

"Judy!" Carl called out as he sprinted across the dirt lot, extracting his sister and eliciting more whines from the baby with his own squeeze. Rick was right behind him, a wide grin lighting up his worn out face as he bent to kiss her soft head.

It was Michonne who hugged Kate first, the woman's bright, sweet smile relieving Kate of any doubt that she wasn't ready to be back.

"It's good to see you." Michonne said. Kate had missed the peaceful sincerity of Michonne's voice.

Over Michonne's shoulder Kate noticed the rest of the group hanging back from those reuniting. There were four new faces, in addition to Abraham's, but the person who caught her eye was Sasha. Sasha stood stone faced, her arms hanging limp at her sides. She made no move to greet them. No indication that she felt any emotion at all watching these people she'd lived with and fought for happily hug their loved ones.

"Michonne." Kate said softly. "Is Sasha ok?"

Michonne looked over her shoulder and back at Kate. She shook her head.

The commotion outside of the church had started to draw walkers and the group made their way into the sanctuary, killing those that approached before they could cause any problems.

The church was a disaster. Some of the pews had been demolished, what remained of them laying in splintered piles near the back of the sanctuary. The organ pipes had been removed and placed in front of the doors like medieval spikes, empty tin cans were scattered all over the pulpit and there were several pools of drying blood on the carpet. The priest, still decked out in a full collar, stood helplessly at the back of the church like a lost puppy. His face was twisted in a permanent mask of disgust, as if he found their very presence abhorrent. Kate wondered if when they started their journey to DC, if he would join them, and if he didn't, what possibly could be left for him here.

Abraham strode up the aisle, brushing against her roughly in his haste.

"Rick!" He called out loudly, unfolding a large map as he walked. "Wanna take a look at this?"

He laid the map out and bent to study it. A petite woman, her hair pulled into two brown ponytails with a cap on her head, stood next to him with one hand on her hip. She watched Abraham trace out a route with his finger and she shook her head. He looked back down at the map before looking around the room in frustration and calling for Rick again.

Rick was standing at the side of the room, Judith in his arms, talking to Hershel and Daryl. At Abraham's bark he excused himself, handing the baby off to her brother and taking his time making his way to the map.

"Hey you." Maggie said happily, wrapping her arms around Kate and squeezing her. The two friends held onto each other tightly and then Maggie pulled away and studied Kate's face.

"How are you doin'?" Maggie asked. Kate feared the question was loaded. She wondered if Beth, or maybe Hershel, had told her about the baby. The last thing Kate wanted to do, right now, in a small room full of people, was talk about the miscarriage.

"So who's the girl with Abraham?" Kate asked, hoping Maggie would take the bait and leave the heavy conversation for another time.

Maggie looked to the front of the church where the duo stood, now joined by Rick, Daryl and Hershel.

"That's Rosita. They're together. They found Glenn passed out on the road outside of the prison."

"Do you like them?"

Kate watched Maggie consider the question.

"I _trust_ them. They're tough. They've fought with us, they've helped us." She pointed across the room to a large man with a mullet sitting quietly by himself at the end of one of the remaining pews. "That's Eugene. The man with the plan. Did Daryl tell you about that? About the cure?"

Kate shook her head and watched the man. He looked dull, hardly how she imagined someone intelligent enough to fix this mess would look.

"So Abraham and Rosita have one goal - get him to Washington. They wanted to get on the road some time ago, but they want us to go with them. They've been frustrated. They were going to leave this morning - Sasha and Tara had agreed to go with them."

"Tara? Flannel shirt?"

Maggie shook her head. "You'll like her. She's really sweet."

The idea of getting to know anyone new exhausted her.

DARYL

Daryl stood next to Rick and watched as Abraham hunched over a map and traced his finger over a route he assumed would lead them to D.C.

"What do you think Daryl?" Rick asked.

Daryl stood with his arm crossed tightly over his chest.

"All the same to me man."

"Hershel?"

Hershel sat in the front pew rubbing his bad leg.

"So what's the plan if we run out of supplies on the way up there? What if we can't find enough fuel, that bus will need a lot."

"We'll find them on the way. We've been doing it since Texas." He explained, motioning to Rosita who shook her head. "I don't see why it won't continue to work."

"It'll be harder to find enough for, how many do we have?" Hershel asked, swiveling his head around and counting the people scattered about the church. "We have a baby, my daughter's ankle is injured and if you hadn't noticed, I'm short a leg."

Hershel smiled and pulled up the leg of his pants, exposing the metal bar that made up the bottom of his prosthetic.

"Look old man…" Abe started.

"Watch yourself." Daryl growled, annoyed at the disrespect in Abe's voice.

Rick put his hand on Daryl's arm.

"It won't be easy, and Hershel raises legitimate concerns." Rick started. "But, Abraham, I gave you my word that we'd go with you after Daryl found our people and that's what we'll do. We just have to be smart about it."

Rick looked at Hershel and Hershel nodded. There wasn't anything left to say.

"OK listen up people." Abraham boomed. The room fell silent. "We've mapped out a route that'll take us to DC, it won't be easy, we'll have to try to collect supplies and gasoline on the way up, but I know what you're all capable of. We'll get Eugene to DC and end this whole nightmare."

Daryl looked at Eugene who hadn't moved from his spot in the pews since they'd gone back inside. The man was expressionless.

Daryl wanted to call bullshit. He wanted to pull Rick aside and tell him that he thought the whole story of saving the world was ridiculous. Eugene looked like he'd have a hard time tying his own shoes, much less being able to reverse whatever the hell caused the dead to rise. But Rick had given Abraham his word and Daryl didn't have a better plan. They couldn't stay in this church forever.

Daryl looked across the room to where Kate sat talking quietly to Maggie in the pews. She looked tired and more sedate than the animated woman he was used to. He wondered what being on the road would do to her, if she was strong enough, healthy enough to endure it. He thought of Josh and Allison, making it work on their own and wondered if maybe Josh was right.

Rick slapped him on the back, pulling him abruptly from his thoughts, "Thank you for bringing them back. It's so good to have everyone together again. You ready to hit the road?"

Daryl nodded.

"Why don't you and Kate follow in the van. Maybe take a few others with you. I don't like the idea of one vehicle - don't want to get stranded."

It wasn't hard to figure out who would be riding in the van with them. Carol wanted to be in the church bus less than he did. He thought Father Gabriel looked like he'd prefer to go with them too, he'd started to open his mealy mouth as Daryl was looking for volunteers. The thought of putting up with that man for countless hours made Daryl panic and so he quickly singled out Michonne, asking her if she'd ride along with them.

Michonne gave a hesitant glance towards Carl and for a second he was sure she'd say no, but she agreed.

Kate was already in the passenger seat, sitting alone quietly and looking out the window into the trees that surrounded the church. He crossed the soft dirt ground of the parking lot and leaned into the passenger side of the van. Kate gave him a small smile, but stayed silent.

"You wanna go? To DC?" He asked.

Kate's smile faded and she looked towards the van where everyone they knew in this entire world was piling in for the journey and then back at him.

"I...I don't know."

"We don't have to."

"We don't?"

"We could stay. Find a place, maybe in the hills."

"Just us?" She asked, the doubt in her voice making his offer seem ridiculous.

"I don't know." He said, losing confidence quickly. He looked down and dug his boot into the dirt a few times. "I just ain't sure this is the right move."

"I feel weird about it too." She said, reaching for him and resting her hand on his arm. He looked up at her, relieved for the reassurance of her touch, for the fact that they felt the same way. "But I'm afraid to stay. I wish we had more time to think about it. I'm not sure I'm ready to say goodbye to everyone."

He nodded. He wasn't ready either. He thought that if she wanted to stay, it would be the strength he needed to do it, but if she wasn't sure either it wasn't going to work.

"Who's saying goodbye?" Michonne asked, walking up, her pack thrown over one arm. Carol rolled the door open on the driver's side of the van and threw her bag inside.

"No one." Daryl replied, not breaking eye contact with Kate. "Ready to go?"

Kate shook her head and he heard Michonne and Carol agree. He leaned in and kissed Kate quickly before shutting her door and heading to the driver's side.

"How long did it take to get from here to DC before?" Kate asked as Daryl pulled away from the church and took his place behind the bus. Carl peered down at their van from the back window and waved Judith's arm at them.

"I remember, in college, driving there in one night." Michonne answered. "Maybe 10 hours, 11. I can't say for sure."

"What was in DC?" Carol asked.

"My best friend went to Georgetown and she wasn't coming home for Thanksgiving. I remember she was down about it and so another friend of mine and I decided to surprise her." Michonne smiled at the memory. "One of those spontaneous things you can do before you have a regular job or kids."

She trailed off and stared out the window.

"We'll be lucky to make it out of fuckin' Atlanta in 10 hours." Daryl muttered under his breath.

The drive was painfully quiet. Anyone that had ever been in a car with Kate for any length of time would know that she wasn't acting herself and it was driving Daryl nuts.

He wished she would rattle on about something on the road that reminded her of life before or insist they all play some stupid road trip game. She hadn't even searched the van for clues about the life of the previous owner and that was something she _always_ did. He thought it was weird and morbid, but it never failed. She'd pull the registration out of the glove box and read off their name and address before diving back in and looking for some other information. Right now he'd welcome the strange bits of trivia that she'd pull from the contents of the glove box, but instead her face was turned away from him, her mind a million miles away. Every once in awhile he'd ask her a question, try and coax a conversation from her, but her answers were short and he wasn't any good at keeping it going. His one comfort was her hand wrapped around his as he rested it on her lap.

They drove through the first day and night, only stopping to find gas or pee. They'd been lucky so far, finding plenty of abandoned vehicles near the city, but as they left the Atlanta area and found themselves in parts of the state that had been less populated, the vehicles weren't as plentiful. The church bus was old, loud and burned gasoline nearly as fast as it drew the attention of walkers. Daryl was on edge.

They were on a long two lane road, on the outskirts of a town that looked to have had few residents even before everyone was eaten, when the brake lights on the bus lit up and the behemoth came to a slow stop in the middle of the road.

"What now?" Daryl grumbled. He watched Rick jump down from the steps of the bus, look around before shouting something up to whoever was driving the bus now.

Rick headed towards their van, shaking his head and coming to a stop on the passenger side and leaning on Kate's open window.

"What the hell's going on? How many times we gonna stop?" Daryl asked irritably.

"Out of gas." Rick explained. "We're gonna head into town, find a place to stay for the night and see if we can find enough to get us back on the road in the morning."

They all let out frustrated sighs.

"I know, I know." Rick started. "But it might be good for us all to get a good night's sleep. I don't know about the seats in here, but those bus seats are hell to sleep on."

KATE

The town was small, but Kate could tell it had been nice at one time. It was in good shape compared to some of the ravaged places they'd been through. It had some walkers, like everywhere did, but there didn't seem to be as many and the town, although clearly deserted, didn't show any signs of looting.

It was a bookstore that they finally decided to hole up in for the night. They cleared it quickly and went to work securing it, pushing the rolling shelves of books in front of the plate glass windows and the doors, plunging the already dim store into darkness.

Kate sat on the floor, her back against a shelf marked, "Classic Literature" and watched Daryl's silhouette as he watched the street through a small slit in the paper they had used to cover some of the windows.

She could hear some of the others, laughing quietly at the front of the store. Being on the road, moving forward with a purpose, seemed to have lifted the spirits of most everyone, but she had no interest in joining them and Daryl didn't seem to either.

He was worked up. Too many hours on the road, too many hours behind the wheel. He'd done the lion's share of the driving, despite many offers from the rest of them to switch. She figured it was his way of being in control of something, which is why the countless stops to search for fuel and the ultimate decision to stay for the night were so frustrating to him.

She wasn't sure she wanted to stop either, but she was actually relieved now that they were secure for the night. The bookstore wasn't huge, but the rolling shelves enabled them to construct little pockets of privacy and she longed to have a moment to herself, away from the captive audience in the van where she had to hold it all in.

"Daryl, I think I'm going to go to sleep."

He looked at her and she could tell he was worried. "You ok?" He asked, the nervous energy finding a place to attend to.

She could hear it in his voice and fearing he'd insist on following her back to their chosen spot between Science Fiction and Thrillers, she mustered up the most confident voice she could.

"I'm good. Just really tired and looking forward to stretching out and getting a good night's sleep."

"Want me to come with you? Told Rick I'd take first watch, but I could switch with someone."

She stood up and joined him at the window, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"No. It's totally ok, finish up watch. I'll see you in a few hours."

She could see the look of hesitation he gave her, but she kissed him and walked away before he had a chance to insist.

The aisles were short and narrow, and as her flashlight beam illuminated the shelves of colorful books she thought about how access to all them would've been a dream come true when they lived at the prison.

The memory of the prison stabbed at her heart and out of habit she pursed her lips and shoved the urge to cry deep inside, before giving herself permission to let the tears that had been threatening all day to fall.

She sat on the rough carpet between the shelves and clicked off her flashlight. A peal of laughter rose over the shelves and she heard someone struggling to suppress a giggle after someone more aware of their risk of drawing walkers thought to shush them. She felt incredibly lonely.

She wished that she could talk to Allison. Allison was the only one she knew that would understand. She had been so afraid that someone was going to ask her about the baby, but she never considered how it would feel to have it forgotten. Allison had warned her about how hard it seemed to be for people to acknowledge the loss of a pregnancy, and that was before the world was just non-stop death. What right did she have to be so devastated about someone she had never met when everyone left had lost someone they loved?

Daryl's flashlight suddenly illuminated the shelves around her. He made an effort to avoid shining the light right in her eyes, but she squinted and looked away, until he was standing over her. He set the flashlight upright on the shelf and the light bounced softly off the ceiling.

Kate wiped at her red, tear stained face with the back of her sleeve and avoided Daryl's concerned face.

He dropped a pile of sky blue t-shirts onto the floor next to her.

"Thought these might help you sleep, found 'em in a box in the back."

She picked one up, less interested in what was on the shirt than the opportunity to have something to do other than sit there and look pitiful. 'I'd rather be reading' was scrawled across the front in white and there was a little stack of books next to it.

"Use 'em as a pillow?" He shrugged. "Or lay on top of 'em. I don't know."

"Thanks."

She thought he might turn and head back to the window to continue staring into the darkening streets, but instead he settled across from her on the ground, leaning against the opposite shelf of books.

She looked anywhere but his face, busying herself by folding the t-shirts and watching him from the corner of her eye. He cleared his throat and then again. Just as she started to feel annoyed that her one chance to grieve was being snatched away so they could sit here in silence, he spoke.

"I wanted that baby too."

She dropped the t-shirt she was folding into her lap and sat still. Her mouth turned down involuntarily and hot tears rolled down her cheeks. It had never crossed her mind that Daryl might be grieving too. She'd taken to heart the words Rick had spoken to her weeks ago in the prison garden - that men don't become fathers until the baby is born and because of that she didn't even resent the fact that the loss seemed to be a burden she had to bear alone. She had been almost glad that Daryl had been spared the pain that she was working through. It was clear that he was worried about her, but it never occurred to her that he was hurting too.

She raised her head to look at him. He stared back at her, his eyes dark and intense. She shook her head, accepting his offering.

He looked away, sniffing loudly and rubbing his fist across his eyes and she was up on her knees, crossing the short space between the shelves, falling against him and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Rise and Shine!" Abraham barked from the end of the row where Daryl and Kate slept. "Gotta hit the road!"

Kate groaned and buried her face in the pile of t-shirts she'd slept on all night. Her eyes felt like they were swollen shut, no doubt from crying so hard, for so long the night before, and her head was pounding. Daryl propped himself up one elbow and rubbed at his face.

"That guy is really starting to annoy me." Kate said through gritted teeth when she was sure Abraham had moved on. "Is he always like this? How does his wife deal with it - wait, are they married? Do you know if they knew each other before all this?"

Kate realized there was a lot she didn't know about these new people they were following to God knew where and she was suddenly curious.

Daryl smiled, the little half smile that quirked up only one side of his mouth, and he leaned down to kiss her.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

KATE

"The Pistons?!" Tara exclaimed in mock disgust. "That's so disappointing!"

Glenn laughed. "You're a Hawks fan Tara, you should be used to disappointment."

"Let me guess, you decided Detroit was your team in 2004, went and bought a pretty new Rasheed Wallace jersey to wear for the playoffs."

"Wrong! Grant Hill baby!" Glenn said loudly, lifting his t-shirt at the shoulders with his fingers as if he was still wearing the jersey that was probably gathering dust in a closet he'd abandoned when the world ended. "My family is from Detroit. I'm not a band-wagoner."

Kate watched Abe, who'd been leading the group down this abandoned highway since they broke camp this morning, stop in his tracks and wait for Glenn and Tara to catch up to him.

"While I hate to interrupt your shitty conversation about two teams that don't fucking exist anymore, I'd like to remind you that there are dead people roaming the Earth and if you don't shut the fuck up they're gonna be all over us like dingleberries on a dog's ass."

The group fell silent.

"Geez." Kate whispered to Daryl from their position at the back of the group. "I'm afraid to even talk, Abraham is going to come over and rip my head off."

"He talks to you like and I'll rip _his_ fuckin' head off." Daryl snarled. "I don't know who he thinks he is, but I'm gettin' tired of him walkin' around actin' like we're all part of his fuckin' personal army, just existin' to get the idiot to DC."

Abraham resumed his position at the front of the pack. He always marched along with his back straight as a stick and his gun in his hands, prepared for whatever danger might threaten Eugene, who trudged along behind him, his plump hands slack against his sides. Rosita, as businesslike as Abraham, guarded him from behind.

Kate wondered again how a man so seemingly dull could possibly hold the secret to life. She had tried, a few times, to get to know him, but he'd answer her questions in such odd and stilted speech that she found it hard to carry on a conversation with him.

The road stretched out endlessly before them as they plodded along at a painfully slow pace. Under the beating sun, the heat rose off the asphalt in wavy lines, and it made Kate feel dizzy. They'd done this before, walk for hours on end, most of them anyway, and she was sure they'd do it again, but wandering always made her feel homesick and this was no exception.

Kate knelt down on the deteriorating road and dug in her pack for a granola bar she was only half sure she hadn't eaten. The cracks in the neglected asphalt spiderwebbed in every direction and the grass that lined them was thirsty and brown. Kate was sore from sleeping on the ground the night before, and she hoped they'd find some place better to sleep tonight or at the very least a vehicle they could all fit in so they could get to their final destination quicker. They'd abandoned the bus just the day before, shortly after they'd crossed the state line into South Carolina. It wasn't the first time the bus had come to a shuddering stop, but it was the last. Glenn had tried his best, but they had to abandon it and head out on foot. The idea, of course, would be they could find some transportation at the next town they came across, but it was proving more difficult than they thought to find functioning vehicles and enough gas to get them anywhere. It was their second day of walking, their second day of feeling discouraged and tempers were running high.

Kate's fingers finally felt the slick packaging of the granola bar, and with relief pulled it out and tore open the wrapper. It was stale and practically disintegrating, but she was grateful she still had it. She broke a chunk off and offered it to Daryl, but he shook his head.

"Naw. You need it more than I do." He insisted.

"I do not." She offered it again, but he refused.

"I can find plenty of things to eat if I have to, things you ain't gonna wanna try."

She wrinkled her nose and chewed the granola, trying not to image what he was talking about, but absolutely knowing he was serious.

"I kiss those lips you know. Don't eat any road kill please."

The stretch of two lane highway they had spent the better part of the day on, was surrounded by a forest of gnarled, leafless trees that left walkers little room to hide. There had been plenty of them to deal with today, but it was easy to spot them coming and the low, cement guardrail that ran along the road gave the dead an extra hurdle making it even easier to put an end to them. In that way the road had been good to them, today anyway, but she wondered how long they'd be able to continue on like this when Hershel had only one good leg and they had a baby whose cries had drawn walkers to them on more than one occasion.

Up ahead the trees dropped off and Kate could hear the sound of moving water. Daryl made a bee-line for the side of the highway bridge and hung his head over the side to watch the muddy brown river move lazily under them. She stopped and waited for him, finishing her granola bar and watching for walkers.

"Ain't much of a river," Daryl scoffed. "And it don't look no different than nearly every river I've ever seen in Georgia."

She smiled. Until two days ago, Daryl had never left Georgia and ever since they'd crossed into South Carolina, she'd been amused at the constant comparisons he was making between the two states.

"Might be some fish in it though." He looked back down at the river and then up at her hopefully. "We could climb down. Try our luck."

Kate looked from him to the group that was moving slowly away from their sight-seeing detour.

"I don't think Abraham would be too happy, when Carol had to stop and pee I thought he was going to have a heart attack."

"Fuck that asshole." Daryl shrugged, throwing a stone he'd collected onto the ground. "We can catch up."

She laughed and he grinned back at her and she saw a glimpse of the boyish Daryl who had been gone for too long.

"Maybe stopping would be good. I think Hershel is slowing down, his leg is pretty bad, but I don't think he'll say anything."

Hershel was at the back of the pack, walking alongside Maggie, his gait uneven and hesitant and Kate saw Daryl's face twist in anger when he saw him struggling. He didn't even respond to her, just charged determinedly towards the group.

"Rick!" Daryl hollered. "Wait up."

He had everyone's attention, and they turned to watch him as his boots pounded the pavement, Kate trotted to Hershel's side. Daryl bent his head to Rick's ear and spoke low enough that no one else heard, but Kate watched Rick closely. He nodded in understanding, his eyes bouncing only momentarily towards Hershel before fixing in the direction of the river.

"Daryl thinks he can get us some fish." He announced to the group. "Let's stop for awhile, see how it goes, maybe make camp here tonight."

Kate waited for Abe to protest, but it was Rosita instead.

"We have hours of daylight left, why would we stop now?" She demanded, her hand on one hip, the butt of her rifle resting on the other and attitude to spare. "Doesn't make sense."

Kate heard Hershel sigh.

"Eating. Eating makes sense to me." Rick replied. "We don't have any food."

"Making camp here tonight is a waste of time Rick and you know it." Abraham added. "I don't want to sit around and scratch my ass when we could be tickin' off the miles to our final destination."

"Don't then. Why don't you take a team east, see if you can't find some transportation. That'll get us there that much faster."

Kate held her breath as she watched the men stare off. She said a silent prayer that he would give in, that they could stop without a battle. She knew Daryl was ready to explode, and she didn't want it to come to blows.

Abe nodded curtly and turned abruptly to head back towards the river, but Kate didn't miss the look he gave Daryl as he passed him. She hoped he'd do as Rick suggested, hoped he'd leave for a few hours and take Rosita with him. She had a feeling they could all use some time apart from one another.

Kate clambered over the guardrail onto the leaf littered forest floor and turned to help Maggie and Glenn get Hershel over. Beth was next and as she handed Judith to Kate the baby gave a squeal of protest. Beth, once on the other side, quickly took the baby back and the reunion silenced Judy's tears.

"She's kind of going through a clingy stage." Beth explained apologetically.

Kate smiled and pushed away the ache that started to stir in the middle of her chest. She turned quickly and walked towards the water, trying to put space between her and the adorable reminder of her own loss.

The river was small, and she wondered if it even qualified as one, but she had no idea if size played a part in labeling bodies of water. The water moved slowly, and even stilled in the shallow pockets near the shore. Perfect for mosquitos and Kate instinctively slapped at her neck. Mosquitos loved Kate and in the summer months she was usually covered in bites. She planted her boots on the muddy shore and watched the other insects skim across the top of the water.

"They're really pissin' me off." Daryl muttered from behind her as he sidestepped his way down the slippery banks to stand next to her on the water's edge. He settled onto the muddy ground and pulled his pack into his lap to dig inside. His movements were frantic and quick, as they always were when he was warring with an emotion, and Kate was grateful he had an occupation to distract him from his frustration.

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Hershel is in pain and they don't give a fuck."

Kate sat down next to him and looked across the river. Out of habit she scanned the balding trees for any signs of walkers and wondered if there were any of them under the murky water.

She sighed. "We've got to get off the road."

Daryl pulled a spool of fishing line and a small, plastic box of hooks out of the deepest part of his bag. He'd found them in a pack attached to a walker he'd killed on the road just yesterday. He got back to his feet and started searching the ground.

"Ah, here we go." He said, leaning down and picking up a long branch. He held it up straight and sent his boot crashing down on the middle and it split into two.

"You fish like this before?" She asked. She'd been plenty of times in her life, but it was always with a pole and a tackle box full of tricks.

"Nearly my whole life." He replied, not bothering to raise his head as he stripped the twigs and leaves from the two sticks.

Daryl tied the line to the bottom of the first stick and wound it up to the tip where he tied another knot, he pulled a length of line from the spool and cut it off with his knife, threading the end through the hook eye and handing it to her.

"Now we just need bait." He said, pulling himself off the ground again and walking a few feet behind her, kicking some of the damp leaves away before crouching down and digging with his fingers through the dirt. It wasn't long before he returned with two writhing, pink worms in the palm of his hand. He sat back down and offered them to her, she plucked one up, speared it through the middle and slid it onto the hook. She dangled her line into the shallow waters and waited. Daryl sat next to her and started lining the second stick. His worm wiggled around on the leg of his pants.

She watched his fingers, caked with dirt and somehow nimble despite their thickness, work at lining the second stick and she realized how badly she missed having them on her body. For a second she let herself pretend the prison was still their home, and this was just a fishing trip. In a few hours they could return to the safety of the cement walls and collapse on their bed. She closed her eyes and imagined the cool feel of the quilt that covered their mattress, how she would trace the starred pattern with her finger. When it was cold she would slip under the covers, shivering between the freezing sheets until Daryl would lay next to her, his bare skin perpetually warm. She knew that it had only been a thin piece of fabric hanging over the cell bars that gave them the illusion of privacy, but it seemed such a luxury to her now. She spent a few more seconds in the comfort of this daydream before she ripped herself back to the present.

"Do you think they'll find something we can all ride in?" She asked, trying to ignore the fresh wave of homesickness that flooded over her. She wanted to be somewhere permanent, somewhere for more than just a night and inching along the back roads like this was never going to work.

"Hope they find more than one so I don't have to sit in a van listenin' to Tara and Glenn argue about sports all day."

Kate laughed and Daryl looked up long enough to grin at her.

"What if they don't? How long do you think we can go like this, on foot? It doesn't make sense with Hershel or with Judith."

"Abraham don't give a shit about that." He replied, squinting down at the hook as he pushed the line through.

"Daryl, I don't think he's a bad guy. He's just got a one track mind and it's set on getting Eugene to DC."

Daryl scoffed. "He's gonna get someone killed."

* * *

It was amazing what a change full bellies and a break from the road brought upon the group. As they sat around the low fire that Carl had built, tearing chunks of fish meat off the bone with their fingers and watching the sun sink low behind the bare trees, Kate was comforted by the sounds of laughter and easy conversation. Even Abraham was wearing a wide grin and rubbing the back of Rosita's shoulders affectionately.

Kate sat Indian style on the forest floor between Daryl and Carol, picking the last pieces of fish from the bones. Daryl shoved the meat in his mouth like a hungry animal, afraid at any moment it could be taken from him. He finished it off, threw the bones to the ground and started sucking the juices off of each finger when he caught Kate and Carol starring at him in amused disgust.

"What?" He growled.

They both laughed.

"Leave me alone." He said playfully, rising to his feet with an indignant smile and slinging his crossbow over his back. "I work all day to get these fish for you two to eat and this is the thanks I get."

"Hey, I caught at least half of these." Kate shot back. "Where are you going?"

"The trees." He said, tipping her head back and planting a quick kiss on her lips. "Ain't gonna have a group of walkers come up on us and ruin the party."

Kate watched his silhouette disappear into the forest and forced herself not to follow him. She knew he could take care of himself, knew that she couldn't expect to be right next to him every minute, but something about this night, despite the food and the cheerful mood, wasn't sitting with her easily and she couldn't figure it out. This felt familiar, and not in a good way.

"I feel like I have deja vu. Like we've done this before." She said to Carol.

Carol tossed her fish bone into the fire and wiped her hands on the sides of her pants.

"We have. Remember the night at the quarry? Andrea and Amy caught all those fish."

"That's it!" Kate said, surprised she hadn't thought of it herself. "The night Amy was killed."

"And Ed." Carol said quietly.

Kate suddenly felt like an idiot for bringing up Amy, without remembering what had happened to Carol's husband. Amy's death had been awful. It was the first walker attack she had witnessed and Amy was the first person she knew who had been killed by one. She had hated Ed, she was relieved he was gone, but still, it seemed so selfish to not have remembered what Carol had gone through that night.

"I'm sorry Carol, I should've remembered. I do remember."

"Don't be sorry, I'm not."

"It seems like so long ago, I guess it wasn't, but you don't even seem like the same person I met back on that road to Atlanta."

"None of us are."

Kate felt like the same person, but she knew it wasn't really true. She shook her head in agreement, but admitting it made her sad.

"Kate, I've wanting to talk to you about something, but haven't had the chance. About what you said back at the prison. When you had the flu."

Kate's pulse quickened and she felt her face go red. She knew right away what Carol was referring to, but had hoped she would never be reminded of that day, the things she said when she thought for sure she wouldn't survive the night. People shouldn't be held to things they say in the throes of death. Her mind raced, trying to think of a way to get out of what was sure to be an extremely awkward conversation.

"I think I was delirious, I don't remember half the things I said."

"You don't remember asking me to promise that I would look after Daryl if something happened to you?"

Kate nodded solemnly. "I do remember that." She confessed.

She couldn't deny it, not when Carol had done exactly that, staying by Daryl's side as they searched for her.

"Then you remember saying that you thought I loved Daryl too."

"I...I didn't mean…"

"No, Kate, you did." Carol interrupted, but there was kindness in her voice. "And you're right, I do love him. Just not in the way you think, not anymore anyway."

Kate looked around uncomfortably, unsure where Carol was taking the conversation and curious if anyone else could hear them. Everyone was absorbed in their own conversations, everyone except Father Gabriel who sat off on his own staring at the ground. No one was paying them any attention.

"I felt connected to Daryl early on." Carol started to explain. "We were both damaged already and that made us different than everyone else in the group and when Sophia disappeared, he showed me more kindness than Ed did for our entire marriage, which I'll admit isn't saying much, but it meant so much to me."

Kate thought back to the awful moment when Sophia emerged from Hershel's barn, her face grayish-green and her eyes sunken and white. Daryl had held Carol back, at first to keep her from running to her daughter, to certain death, and then as she cried.

"I thought maybe, maybe that meant we would be good together and God knows I tried to let him know how I felt." She laughed. "Either he never noticed or pretended not to, because he never gave me even a clue that he was picking up on it at all, but I was undeterred. I had nothing but time. And then one day, when we were first at the prison, I saw him looking at you from across the common room. You didn't notice, you were talking to Maggie I think, but Daryl couldn't stop watching you, I know because I was so busy watching him. If you were in the room, he couldn't help himself. At first I shrugged it off, it bothered me, but I didn't really think it would come to anything. I didn't think you were interested. But then he was gone, off with Merle and I was devastated, but I realized I wasn't the only one. You were a mess, I watched you lay out by the fence and cry, and I knew then that you must've loved him too. And when he came back, well, you know how the rest of it goes."

Carol stared off in the distance and sighed, then smiled.

"For what it's worth, I was wrong, we wouldn't have been a good fit. I know that now." She looked at Kate with her cool gray eyes and Kate knew she was sincere. "There is no balance in two broken people who share the same strengths and the same weaknesses. I realized that when I saw him with you. Daryl needs a soft place to land."

Kate smiled, she felt a little overwhelmed with the confession and the unexpected emotion that came along with it. She and Carol had never been close, and with the exception of her days with the flu they'd hardly had a meaningful conversation, and suddenly she was laying her heart bare.

"I just wanted you to know, felt I owed you an explanation. I didn't want you thinking I still had feelings for your husband. I still love him, but now it's more sisterly, if that makes sense."

Kate shook head insistently and searched for the right words. "You didn't owe me an explanation. I shouldn't of..I…I was always curious, I always wondered about your feelings for him, but it never made me feel differently about you. You have to forgive me for saying what I did at the prison, you have to know, under regular circumstances, I would never, ever have brought that up."

"It's probably good that you did, so I could explain. Clear the air."

A beam of light suddenly shone in their eyes, and then swung quickly away, revealing Tara walking towards them.

"Sorry." She said. "Didn't mean to blind you. Do either of you have to pee? I'm heading to the trees - we could take turns keeping watch."

Carol stood. "I'll go with you."

They walked away and Kate surveyed the rest of the group, her conversation with Carol was a lot to take in and she needed to shake it off, to reset. Daryl was still gone, but everyone else was accounted for, sitting or standing in groups of two or more engaged in conversation. She stood up and circled the camp, stretching her legs and looking into the trees to see if she could spot Daryl.

She noticed Father Gabriel again, still sitting alone, staring at the ground. Kate hadn't made much of an effort to talk to him. If she had to come up with a reason, she guessed it was because he didn't really seem to want to talk to anyone. He just always looked like he was ready to cry or maybe throw up. His face was perpetually twisted into a look of discomfort. But tonight, when everyone seemed happy for once, her heart went out to him. He must feel so lonely, so out of place and she suddenly felt like a little kindness might do him some good.

She approached him and he looked up at her, his eyes narrowed suspiciously and his mouth agape. It was as if he couldn't imagine what she possibly could want with him.

"Mind if I sit with you?" She asked.

He closed his mouth, looked at the ground and nodded.

She sat a couple of feet away from him and folded her legs underneath her.

"Did you like the fish?"

"Yes. Thank you." He said curtly, avoiding her eyes.

"You aren't used to the road. How are you holding up?"

"I have blisters. These shoes really aren't made for this."

She looked down at the black dress shoes that sat next to him. On his feet were black socks that matched his black pants, shirt and coat. She suddenly wondered if his underwear was also black. It made her laugh.

"No, I guess they aren't." She said, not being able to stifle her giggles.

"You find it funny?" He asked, the bitterness evident in his voice, and she knew she'd offended him.

"No. I'm sorry. It reminded me of something else."

"You know, I've been watching you all tonight. Everyone seems so happy, smiling, laughing, sharing stories. It was like that at the church too, the night before they slaughtered those people. Before they spilt blood in the Lord's house."

Kate understood how upsetting it was for Gabriel, she knew how upsetting death continued to be for her, but Carol was right, they were different now and part of that was the fact that this was part of their life. Considering Gabriel had been sheltered from a lot, locked alone in his church for so long, it couldn't be an easy adjustment. She wanted him to see that there sometimes wasn't a choice and it was definitely not something they wanted to do.

"Gabriel, those people they killed, they were horrible people. The things they had done, you know about where they came from? Where the group had just escaped from, right?"

"You weren't there. You didn't see Rick. You didn't see Sasha. It wasn't right. This group, this group..." Gabriel started to shake.

"Gabriel, we've all done things. Things that in the old world we would never have imagined ourselves capable of. That doesn't make us evil, it just means we're trying to survive. To keep ourselves and our people safe. Believe me, none of us want to, we all wish it were different."

Gabriel shook his head in disgust. "Satan has fooled you into believing that your actions are justifiable, but there will be payment for these deeds."

"What about you?" She said gently. "I heard there were things that you did. Things that you must regret, that others would consider evil, but…"

"And I will pay for those sins!" He cut her off. "...but the difference is, I am not laughing and continuing on with my life like those things didn't happen. I live every day with pain and guilt and I pray for the Lord's forgiveness."

Gabriel's eyes flashed with anger and his voice was strong and full of conviction. It was if he was suddenly transported back onto his pulpit and now that he had an audience he was going to deliver his message.

"And I pray for each of you too, I pray for your souls and that each of you will repent of your sins and turn to the Lord. I've heard things too, I heard that you lost a child. I do not pretend to understand why God allows some to live, and some to perish, but what I do know is that you reap what you sow. You say that the violence is necessary, that murder is _necessary_ for the survival of the group, but God abhors violence. The Lord wants us to live in light and love, and to reap _life_ , but as long as you live in violence you will reap _death."_

DARYL

The woods were clear, which sometimes made Daryl more uneasy than not. It felt like there should be something in the trees tonight, they were making more noise than usual and the light from the fire was bound to attract something living or dead, but Daryl had circled their camp several times, weaving in and out of the balding trees and hadn't seen a thing.

He was headed back, trying to make out the silhouettes as they moved around the fire, by now they'd be finished with their fish and preparing the camp for sleep by now. He wasn't on watch tonight, and neither was Kate. Glenn and Maggie were taking first shift, and Michonne and Sasha were going to take over and watch the group until morning light. Daryl was looking forward to sleep.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw someone dart quickly from the edge of their camp, into the woods. He couldn't be sure, but he thought he saw a flash of blonde hair and that left only two possibilities: Beth or Kate. He didn't feel comfortable with either of them in the trees by themselves, and so he cut across the forest floor to investigate.

He heard her crying first, and found her in the dim light of the moon leaning against a tree.

"Kate?" He announced himself, knowing how dangerous it was to sneak up on anyone in the dark.

With one sharp intake of breath, her crying stopped.

"Ya." She answered, her voice thick and betraying any attempt she was making to sound natural.

He reached out and pulled her into his arms.

"What is it?" He asked urgently, wondering how he could have left her smiling and joking at the fireside only minutes ago, to find her so upset now. For a fleeting second he thought maybe she'd been pretending that things were getting better, hiding her true feelings from him and that scared the shit out of him.

"I'm sorry." She said, her words muffled against his body. "I'm ok."

"You ain't actin' ok." He asked again, gentler this time. "Please tell me."

She didn't answer at first and then pulled away from, leaning back against the tree and taking a deep breath.

"Gabriel happened." She said, and he could hear the bite in her voice. She was angry. "I tried to talk to him, tried to get him to talk to me. Big mistake."

Daryl could feel the fury start to come alive inside of him. "What'd he do?" He asked, pacing back and forth over the carpet of leaves.

"He thinks we're all evil. Murderers. That the fact that we can do such terrible things and then sit around a fire and laugh with each other means…"

"Gabriel is full of shit. Don't let what that asshole says bother you. Fuckin' hypocrite, you heard Michonne, you know what he did to his own people."

"I know. What he did was so much worse, but Daryl, he knows about the baby. He said that we reap what we sow."

Daryl went still. He felt like someone had dumped ice into his veins.

"How'd he know?"

"I don't know, living as close as we all do he was bound to hear something. I don't really care how he knows. Fuck, I don't even care what he says, he's a fucking coward, I told him he was too."

"Good."

"But what he said," Kate said, and she started to cry again. "I've been thinking it all along and to hear someone say it out loud."

* * *

Daryl couldn't sleep, anger kept him awake. He laid on his back and stared at the blanket of stars that dotted the black sky and thought about Kate crying and his stomach churned. It was a clear night and the moon shone brightly on the makeshift camp. The group was scattered around the stone circle where they'd made their fire. He could hear Eugene snoring and someone was talking in their sleep. Glenn and Maggie were leaning against two trees on the outskirts of camp, keeping an eye on those who slept and speaking in whispers.

Daryl turned to his side and faced Kate as she slept soundly next to him, silent except for the occasional shuddery breath that would escape from somewhere deep inside her. She always did that after she cried, she had told him she'd done it her whole life, and every time she did he thought about what Gabriel said to her and his anger grew.

He reached down and pulled the blanket over her shoulders and hoped that tomorrow would be better, that she wouldn't have gone back to that place where he couldn't reach her. Over Kate's shoulder, he saw a figure rise up from the ground and make its way to Maggie and Glenn.

He could hear Gabriel's voice, just a whisper, but couldn't make out his words.

"Gabriel, You don't have to ask permission to pee." Maggie said with a hint of humor and frustration.

Father Gabriel's shadowy figure headed towards the trees. It was exactly what Daryl had been hoping would happen. Daryl stood up quickly and followed. He nodded in Maggie and Glenn's direction, ignoring their curious stares and disappeared into the woods.

Father Gabriel walked slowly through the trees, his head swiveling left and right in search for anything that might hurt him.

Daryl stalked him soundlessly, undetected and tackled him from behind. Gabriel fell to the ground with a groan as the air was knocked from his lungs. Daryl was on him, pinning him to the ground with his weight, his forearm to his throat and his face looming over Gabriel's. Gabriel's eyes were wide and full of terror, it didn't fade when he realized he knew his attacker. His mouth gaped open, but no sound escaped.

Daryl stared into his eyes for a moment before he spoke. He wanted him to think that maybe the only reason he was out here was to kill him. He felt Gabriel's body struggle against him, and his one free arm batted against Daryl uselessly.

"My wife...she is good. But I ain't." Daryl growled, inches from Gabriel's face. His teeth were gnashed together and he could feel his own heart thundering against his chest. He pushed against Gabriel's throat harder "And if I ever, EVER hear you've been talkin' to her again like you did tonight, I will fuckin' kill you."

Daryl let off his neck and grabbed him by the lapels of his black coat, lifting his chest off the ground. Gabriel sucked in a lungful of air and started to cough.

"Understand me?"

Gabriel offered no reply, just hung limply from Daryl's grasp and panted. Daryl shook him. "DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

Gabriel shook his head frantically and Daryl could smell urine.

"You fuckin' coward." He said, curling his lip in disgust.

He let go of him and Gabriel fell back onto the decaying leaves, still coughing and curling into a ball. Daryl turned and headed back to camp.


End file.
